Appearances
by Ebony-Jayne
Summary: There's a new Cheerio at WMHS...Santana hates her, Brittany kind of likes her...lots of people think she's hiding something. Will ultimately  eventually  be Brittana  but theres a bit of Santana/OC thrown in there too.
1. Prologue

Title: Appearances

Summary: When you meet people, they appear a certain way. Mostly these appearances are natural, not consciously thought about…other times they are carefully cultivated to hide what lies beneath. What lies beneath what Natasha Isaacs shows the world? Some Santana/OC eventual Brittana.

**!WARNING!: This story will eventually deal with abuse in various forms, self harm and mentions of suicide. It may trigger so please be aware of this before you read.** This won't be for a few chapters yet though. Also a few dirty words here and there. Hence the T rating. Which may go up. Or may not…

Disclaimer: Much as I wish I owned more than just the DVD's and soundtracks from Glee I don't. Any similarities between characters and persons living or dead is purely coincidental…mostly...Hehe. UnBeta'd so any mistakes are my own…hopefully there won't be many, if any.

Glee!

Chapter One: Prologue

"YOU WANNA GO BITCH?" Santana Lopez screamed at the smaller Cheerio.

"YOU RECKON YOU CAN TAKE ME LOPEZ? HA!" the new Latina girl screamed back. Santana lunged and the girl managed to leap out of the way sending Santana careening into the lockers behind her. Santana screamed something unintelligible before lunging a second time and managing to get hold of the smaller girl's arm. She drove her back against the lockers on the other side of the hall.

"Stop it. Stop it," Brittany Pierce called out somewhat vaguely from the gathering crowd, her hands clamped tightly over her ears. She hated seeing Santana fight with people.

"AAAAAHHHH BITCH!" the girl screamed as Santana grabbed her ponytail and pulled as hard as she could. The tiny girl dropped her shoulder and rammed it into Santana's stomach, knocking the air out of her, causing her grip to loosen on the smaller Cheerio's long hair. Santana gasped, trying to draw air into her winded lungs even as she attacked again.

"Hey!" Sue Sylvester's voice called out as the tall cheerleading coach shoved students roughly out of the way. She grabbed the shorter girl around the waist and hauled her away as she tried to punch the injured Santana in the face. "Stop it! Airbags, don't you dare or so help me I will have you running suicide sprints 'til Christmas!" she snapped at Santana who was currently trying to get at the girl again. She was being restrained by Will Schuester who had come from the opposite direction to Sue.

"Calm down Santana," He yelled as she struggled hard against him in her attempts to get at the other cheerleader. Sue had actually had to lift the small girl's feet off the ground to control her. She may have only been 5 feet tall but damn she was strong.

"Fine!" Santana shrieked at him. Giving up her struggling. Will released his grip slightly then tightened it again as she lunged toward the other girl as he had known she would.

"Santana stop now!" Will hauled the girl around and dragged her down the hallway away from the others.

"What the hell is going on?" he demanded, gripping her upper arms.

"Bitch can't keep her nose in her own business," Santana spat angrily.

"That's not an excuse to pick a fight Santana!" Will cried in exasperation. "Are you ok?" he asked when Santana winced as she moved.

"Ugh, yeah. Bitch winded me," she gasped, probing her tender abdomen gently. "Ouch."

"Come on I'll walk you to the nurse," Will sighed. He rested one hand between Santana's shoulder blades and steered her in the direction of the nurse.

Glee!

In Sue's office the coach was grilling the girl as she did push ups on the floor.

"What in all holy hell is going on between you and Chesticles, Isaacs?" Sue demanded.

"She started it," the girl, Natasha Isaacs, huffed.

"I don't care who started it. I don't want my Cheerios putting on free shows of violence in front of the rest of these mouth breathers. If you're going to fight you could at least find a mud puddle, charge admittance and donate the proceeds to the Cheerios," Sue ranted. "I could use a few more confetti cannons for Nationals." Natasha faltered in her push ups, glaring at the Coach in disbelief. This woman was a fucking nut job. Natasha had only been here two weeks and was quickly realising that Sue Sylvester was the best, purely because she was batshit crazy enough to attempt things that no other coach would even have the ability to think up in the first place. Now here she was telling Natasha that she could fight only so long as she was making a profit for the Cheerios off of it, and the scary thing was Natasha didn't doubt that the woman would actually let them fight for profit. Natasha quickly resumed her push ups, not wanting to have to go through any of the weirder punishments she had seen the woman dish out in the short time since she had started at William McKinley High School. Sue continued ranting; "God knows the one they call 'Jewfro' would pay enough to see you two fight. You could literally make hundreds off of it..." Sue paused, considering. "Well, well well. I think I just discovered what the Cheerios' booth will be at the school fair this year…Sue Sylvester, you're a genius!" Sue finished her rant, more or less talking to herself at the end of it. "Get out of my office Isaacs. You and Airbags are a disgrace to that uniform and it makes my corneas burn to look at you," Sue dismissed Natasha, already pulling out her journal to chronicle what she had deemed her 'latest stroke of genius'.

Natasha quickly left the Coach's office, heading to the bathroom to try and straighten herself up before she had to go to her next class, wondering once again what she had gotten herself into by joining Sue Sylvester's Cheerios.

Glee!

"YA THINKS YA GOTS THE SHIT TO BEAT ME UP? BRING IT ON! I'LL SHOW YOU HOW WE DO IT IN LIMA HEIGHTS ADJACENT!" Santana screamed. For the fourth time this week she was duking it out with Natasha Isaacs who now had a rep at McKinley as a scrappy little bitch. People were already getting bored with the fights. There was a lot of yelling, a few cheap shots and then the teachers would turn up, break them up and haul them off in opposite directions to calm down. Today would be no different.

"Oh big whoop Lima Heights Adjacent is pathetic! I grew up in Raglan County! You don't learn how to fight until you spend a semester at Raglan County High!" Natasha spat back sarcastically.

"Come on then! Show me whats ya gots!" Santana beckoned Natasha to come closer. Natasha made like she was going to lunge, pulled back then lunged properly, taking Santana off guard and slamming her into the lockers.

"Hey! You stop this crap right now!" came a voice behind them. Quinn Fabray in all her Head-bitch-in-charge glory, stood with her hands on her hips shooting a positively murderous look at the pair.

"Fuck off Fabray!" the two girls yelled back in unison. Santana took advantage of Natasha's momentary distraction to slap her hard across the cheek. Natasha yelped and shoved Santana back.

"Stop it! Stop hurting each other!" poor Brittany called out in distress. The fighting had taken a bigger toll on the sweet natured cheerleader than it had on either Santana or Natasha. Both girls ignored her, pushing, shoving, hair-pulling and throwing each other down. Then, as predicted, Will Schuester and Emma Pillsbury came running over to separate them…accompanied by Principal Figgins.

"Shit," Natasha spat angrily. She shoved Santana once more for good measure. Will grabbed the taller girl before she could retaliate.

"Give it up Santana. It's over," Will said in exasperation.

"This isn't over bitch!" Santana yelled at Natasha who's arm was firmly grasped in Ms Pillsbury's hands. "I'm gonna kick your ass!"

"Miss Lopez, Miss Isaacs in my office, NOW!" Figgins ordered.

Glee!

"I have had enough of all of this violence!" Figgins yelled. "You two are not allowed to fight on school grounds or I will be forced to suspend you! This is your last chance. And furthermore as punishment, Miss Isaacs will join Glee Club and you two will learn to get along!"

"Oh hell no!" Natasha shrieked. Santana just let out a loud growl. Glee was her turf. The best part of her day and now that bitch Isaacs would be there every day? So not fair!

"I think that's a great idea," Will weighed in, before shrinking back from the twin glares that he was now receiving.

"Well then it's settled," Figgins said happily. "Miss Isaacs you will begin attending Glee Club on Monday."

Glee!

A bit of a random start I know but I needed this to get Natasha into Glee involuntarily. The real story begins in the next chapter.

Thanks for reading, reviews are nice…hint hint…


	2. Chapter 01

Title: Appearances

Summary: When you meet people, they appear a certain way. Mostly these appearances are natural, not consciously thought about…other times they are carefully cultivated to hide what lies beneath. What lies beneath what Natasha Isaacs shows the world? Some Santana/OC eventual Brittana.

**!WARNING!: This story will eventually deal with abuse in various forms, self harm and mentions of suicide. It may trigger so please be aware of this before you read.** This won't be for a few chapters yet though. Also a few dirty words here and there. Hence the T rating. Which may go up. Or may not…**Spoilers for season 2. **I have just decided that this story starts just after 'Duets'. So Sam is new too. I will include some storylines but not all…

Disclaimer: Much as I wish I owned more than just the DVD's and soundtracks from Glee I don't. Any similarities between characters and persons living or dead is purely coincidental…mostly...Hehe. UnBeta'd so any mistakes are my own…hopefully there won't be many, if any.

Glee!

Chapter One

On Monday all eyes were on Natasha as she slinked into Glee Club, taking a seat near the back. She had a filthy look on her face; her green eyes were full of resentment. The glare she shot at Santana as she walked past made half of the club cringe away from her in fear. She walked up to the back row, chose the furthest corner away from everyone else and flopped into a seat. Still glaring sullenly. Rachel Berry, clearly with no concept of the dangerous water she was treading, walked right up to the girl and started her usual long-winded rambling.

"Hi, on behalf of everyone, I would like to welcome you to Glee Club. I'm Rachel Berry, the star," she said straightening as she said star. More sets of eyes than Natasha cared to count rolled at the ego display. "I know that Glee isn't the epitome of coolness but if you are open and give us a shot I think you'll find a nice little family here," she told the girl. Natasha, still with the sullen glare, scoffed, before lifting her eyes to Rachel.

"Thank you," she said, sounding bored, before she dropped her eyes again. Confused and surprised looks were shooting all around the room. Kurt and Mercedes looked at each other, Kurt mouthed _'Huh?'_ and Mercedes responded with a shrug. Santana and Quinn exchanged nervous glances, both thinking that perhaps the girl was saving her usual biting aggression for later. They couldn't ponder for long though as Mr Schuester chose that moment to walk in.

"Ah I see our new member found us ok!" he said cheerily, ignoring the piercing green eyes currently attempting to glare him to death from the back row. "Guys this is Natasha Isaacs. She recently transferred here and walked onto the Cheerios. You've probably seen her around," Mr Schue grimaced slightly at the images that conjured up.

"Hey," Puck greeted, turning around to look the cheerleader up and down, a lecherous look on his face.

Natasha leaned toward Puck and spoke, her voice sweet, her eyes narrowed and menacing. "Puckerman, if you ever check me out like that again, then so help me God I will knee you in the balls so hard they'll end up lodged in your brain," the sweet voice had morphed into a vicious snarl by the end of the sentence. Puck paled slightly and turned back around his hand unconsciously shifting to cover himself protectively.

"Enough Natasha," Mr Schue groaned, he realised that the cheerleader had no intention of making friends or making this easy for him. The girl just sat back and resumed her sulking. "Ok, so today, as a welcome exercise I thought you could all pick a song that you feel describes your personality, or an aspect of your personality and we will perform them on Wednesday. It will help us get to know each other a little bit better. Which means today you are free to go off, find your song and start rehearsing. Natasha if you need some help, come and see me, or one of the others. I'm sure they'll all be willing to help you," Mr Schue said pointedly. Santana stopped filing her nails long enough to scoff loudly.

"Hey, you told me I had to join this stupid club. No one told me I had to sing or dance," Natasha leaned back and folded her arms. Mr Schue decided to let it go for now.

"Alright you can have a week to settle in. After that you will be taking part, or you will be suspended for fighting. Your choice," he told her firmly. She just glared back without speaking. "Right, now onto picking your songs-"

"Mr Schue," Rachel interrupted. "If I may, I prepared a ballad I believe will be perfect for Regionals!"

"Maybe another day Rachel. One thing at a time," Mr Schue told Rachel who looked extremely put out.

"Fine," She mumbled, going back to her seat, crossing her arms and sulking, unconsciously mimicking the position of the new girl behind her.

"Alright, well, everybody go and work on your songs!" Mr Schue told them, rubbing his hands together. The group split into smaller ones and they spaced themselves out around the room, no-one actually left to Will Schuester's surprise. Rachel took off into her own corner; no doubt making a giant list she could later narrow down –through multiple graphs and spreadsheets - to one song. Sam, Finn and Puck were hunched over Puck's folder, grinning stupidly. Mr Schue decided to leave them alone, knowing that he probably didn't want to see whatever was in that folder. Kurt and Mercedes had their heads together, plotting…or gossiping. Tina, Mike and Artie also had their heads together but were probably actually doing what they were meant to be doing. Quinn and Santana were doing their nails and Brittany was slowly inching away from Santana and toward Natasha. Mr Schue watched the tall blonde out of the corner of his eye. She was clearly trying to get to Natasha to talk to her without her best friend noticing. After a few minutes she made it and sat down next to the girl.

"How come you keep fighting with Santana?" she asked softly. Santana whipped around and glared at Brittany, who promptly aimed her best pout at the Latina. Santana rolled her eyes, then got up, dragging Quinn with her to give Brittany the privacy she wanted.

"Because Santana and I don't like each other," Natasha told Brittany.

"How come?" Brittany asked sadly, Natasha didn't like the way Brittany's sad face made her feel inside.

"Sometimes people just don't like each other Brittany," She said gently, patting the girl's pale hand. Brittany seized the opportunity to grasp Natasha's hand in hers.

"But why? I like everybody! Well except Patches…He barks at my mom…and I don't really like Karofsky because he slushies my friends…but other than that I like everyone," Brittany looked positively confused.

"We're not all as lovely as you Britt. Some people are just assholes. Santana and I? Assholes," Natasha said simply.

"That's mean," Brittany said, her confused, vaguely sad expression never changing.

"I know, but it's true," Natasha said with a sad smile.

Glee!

"Why do you keep being nice to her?" Santana demanded after Glee when she and Brittany were standing at her locker.

"Well 'cause I think she's actually really nice," Brittany replied as she attempted to remember her combination.

"Nice? She's a moron. She likes to get up in people's business and she enjoys hitting people. Which part of that is nice?" Santana scoffed.

"Well, I think she's not really like that. She just does it so people don't mess with her…or try to be her friend," Brittany seemed confused and upset which made Santana want to strangle that bitch Isaacs. No one made Brittany look like she did right now and got away with it.

"Just stay away from her Britt. She's a loser," Santana ordered before opening Brittany's locker for her and walking away, leaving a frowning Brittany behind her.

Brittany, face scrunched in confusion, peered down the hall to where Natasha finished packing books into her bag before quietly approaching Rachel, who was at her own locker. She may not have been intellectually smart but Brittany could read people the way most people could read books. But there was something about Natasha. She was hiding. Hiding behind a façade of aggression and bravado. But Brittany couldn't figure out why. Natasha was better than most people at hiding herself. Even Brittany was struggling to see her.

Glee!

Rachel was packing up books at her locker when she felt a presence behind her. She turned, bracing for a slushy in the face, but instead met the expected Cheerios uniform and newly familiar piercing green eyes which were sizing her up. Natasha Isaacs.

"Uh can I help you?" Rachel asked nervously.

"I realised that I rudely neglected to introduce myself earlier," the girl said in a surprisingly soft, calm voice.

"Uh…oh?" Rachel replied, her voice beginning to shake.

"I'm Natasha Isaacs," Natasha held out her hand to the shaking girl in front of her. Rachel shook it timidly.

"Why do they call you man hands?" Natasha asked, Rachel was searching the girl's eyes for any hint of what she was planning and why she was doing this.

"Um…I don't know. You'd have to ask Quinn that. She made it up," Rachel replied. She noticed Natasha's eyes sizing her up again and backed up, almost into her locker. Natasha cocked her head curiously at the movement.

"Interesting..." the girl replied, looking her up and down again.

"Um...did you want something...?" Rachel asked hesitantly.

"Just making myself known amongst the locals," Natasha told her. She smiled, a surprisingly friendly smile and turned to walk away. "Later, Rachel," she called back over her shoulder as she walked away.

Rachel was left standing almost in her locker, stunned by the exchange, and a little bit freaked out by it. What was the girl up to? What was she planning to do to her? Something big probably. Something that would publicly humiliate her beyond anything she had ever experienced before, that would forever ingratiate Natasha with the Cheerios. Maybe she was trying to oust Quinn from her position as head cheerleader and HBIC? Or maybe she was planning it _with _the rest of the Cheerios? That idea made Rachel feel sick to her stomach and caused a shiver to crawl its way down her spine. As Rachel finished putting the last of her homework in her bag, she vowed to be especially vigilant, to keep her eyes and ears open at all times and to prepare herself for whatever the pretty Cheerio had in store for her…As she turned away from her locker her vision was obscured by an icy wall of purple and the sounds of laughter met her ears.

"Suck that loser!" Azimio laughed. Rachel sighed, reopened her locker, grabbed her slushy kit and wondered for the millionth time what she had ever done to deserve this crap.

Glee!

Thanks for reading. Feeling like I'm still a bit rocky, but as I get into the story I should be able to bring it together and be a bit more fluid.

Reviews make me a happy, happy little writer…


	3. Chapter 02

Appearances

A/N: Just want to go on record saying that any homophobia on Karofsky's (or any other character's) part is purely for the story. It doesn't reflect the author's views by a long shot. We're made how we're made, live and let live. That said I hope you enjoy this chapter…

Glee!

Chapter Two.

"BRITT!" Santana hollered across the field at her tall blonde friend. She saw Brittany flinch in the distance and turn her head away from the tiny girl she was chatting with. Santana just angled her head toward the locker room and marched toward it, knowing Brittany would follow her. Once inside Santana opened her locker and began digging out the stuff she would need for the shower while she waited for Brittany. When the girl finally walked in Santana fixed her with her best mad-face.

"What's wrong San?" Brittany asked, confused and wracking her brain for anything she might have done to piss off her best friend.

"Britt, I told you about hanging around with _her_," Santana injected as much venom into that last word as she possibly could.

"But San," Brittany whined, "I like her."

"I don't care if you like her. She's a loser and she's bad for our reputation. Like Man-Hands," Santana tried to get her point across nicely.

"I like Rachel too," Brittney said distantly, a smile gracing her lips. Santana rolled her dark eyes.

"Britt," she said as softly as she could, dragging the girls attention back to the here and now. "You can't hang out with her ok? If you're a loser I can't be your friend anymore and that would really suck," Santana knew it was a low blow but hey, if it worked…She swallowed her guilt at the panicked look on the poor blonde's face.

"But San, that would be awful!" she gasped.

"Yeah it would," Santana agreed solemnly. "Really, really awful. So you need to stay away from her ok?" Santana saw the conflict in Brittany's sea-blue eyes and her hesitation before the blonde nodded gently. "I'm going to take a shower," Santana walked into one of the stalls and pulled the curtain across. Brittany gathered her things and went into the one beside her.

"Santana?" she called out softly.

"Yeah Britt?" Santana called back.

"I'm not sure, but I think that my cat is spying for the United States government."

Glee!

The next morning Santana wanted a fight and she knew where she could get one. She marched up to Natasha's locker as she was pulling books out and slammed the locker shut hard, almost catching Natasha's hand in it in the process.

"Hey!" Natasha yelped, breathing hard in fright.

"Lucky your reflexes are quick, loser," Santana taunted. Natasha eyed her and opened her locker, pulling another book out. Santana snarled and slammed the locker hard again.

"Is there something you want Santana?" Natasha asked, in exasperation.

"Other than to make your life miserable?" Santana smirked.

"Yeah other than that," Natasha stood with a hand on her hip and eyed Santana warily. Santana wondered why they weren't fighting yet. She decided to push harder.

"I wants to finish what we started Isaacs. And I wants you to stay away from Britts. That's all mine ya hear?" Santana got right up in Natasha's face, using the five inches she had on the other girl to her advantage.

"Whatever Santana," Santana was stunned when the other girl just calmly reopened her locker and resumed sorting her books. She stood there, staring at the other girl until she closed her locker, eyed Santana warily once again and brushed past her, heading to her first class.

Glee!

Santana had a feeling that Brittany would forget about their conversation in the locker room the day before so she decided that maybe a little visual reminder of Natasha Isaac's loser-ism was in order to keep it fresh in her mind. And besides, no one calmly walked away from Santana when she used her long practised intimidation tactics. So the next day she cornered Karofsky as he came out of the guy's bathroom at lunchtime.

"Karofsky," She drawled.

"Satan," Karofsky smirked at the Latina.

"Funny," Santana pushed off of the wall she'd been leaning against and walked toward the jock. "I wants to do a deal with you Karofsky," she stated.

"What kind of a deal?" Karofsky asked, blatantly staring at her chest. Santana rolled her eyes and folded her arms over her assets.

"I'll give you 100 bucks to slushy Isaacs," Santana told him.

"Fuck no!" Karofsky shook his head. "Fabray would have me castrated for slushying a Cheerio!"

"Fuck Fabray!" Santana scoffed. "I'll make sure she's not a problem for you." Karofsky looked dubious. "I'll make it 200," Santana offered. Karofsky looked at Santana, conflicted. On the one hand 200 bucks would get him a lot closer to getting that new iPod he wanted, on the other hand he was quite fond of his balls and despite Santana's confident assurance that Quinn Fabray wouldn't be an issue, he wasn't so sure it was a promise she would be able to keep. In the end though, his greed won out.

"Ok. 200," he agreed.

"Good boy," Santana smirked condescendingly. "You'll get your money after you give me what I want," she informed him before turning on her heel and stalking away from him.

Glee!

The next day Karofsky quite literally ran into Quinn in the parking lot, almost knocking her down. The cheerleader was in a filthy mood and Karofsky got the verbal bollocking of a lifetime from the angry blonde. She screamed at him so loudly that birds left nearby trees in flocks. It was terrifying. After she had stalked off, muttering about mowing him down with her car, Karofsky decided that maybe slushying a Cheerio today would not be a good idea. He decided instead to just shove Isaacs into her locker as he walked past in the hopes that that would at least be enough to prevent a beat down from Santana.

As he strutted down the hallway toward his target he saw that hot, dumb cheerio Brittany Pierce watching Isaacs like a damn hawk. He smirked at her as he angled toward Natasha as she put the last of her books away, totally unsuspecting. He grinned as he approached her before he shoved her into her locker. He didn't do it that hard, she was a girl after all and he wasn't so much of an asshole that he'd shove her as hard as he'd shove that homo Hummel, but suddenly, in a matter of seconds, all hell had broken loose. Natasha let out an agonised scream as her ribs hit the doorjamb of her locker, she crumpled to the floor absolutely howling in pain. She gasped and writhed on the floor, leaning against the locker under hers and clutching gingerly at her side. Karofsky felt someone slam into him. He lost his balance and stumbled against the lockers, looking up just in time to see Brittany Pierce give him one hell of a death glare. He had to give it to the girl, before now he hadn't known she'd had it in her.

Brittany had seen Karofsky walking down the hall, his eyes focused on someone in front of him. She saw him shove Natasha into her locker, he didn't even do it all that hard, then Natasha was howling in pain on the ground and Brittany ignored what Santana had told her and made a beeline for the girl. She made a point of slamming into Karofsky as hard as she could and giving him her best Santana-esque death glare as she passed him, before kneeling next to the girl.

"Natasha?" she said softly. Natasha's breath was coming in short, hard gasps. "Natasha what's wrong?" Brittany cupped the small girl's face in her hands, thumbs stroking her cheeks soothingly.

"Oh God!" Natasha gasped out. She closed her eyes and Brittany watched carefully as she tried desperately to catch her breath. After a minute or so her breathing began to even out. Her eyes fluttered open and she locked eyes with Brittany. Then she wrenched her face out of Brittany's hands, slowly hauling herself painfully into a standing position, shutting her locker carefully. Then she bolted. Brittany followed, seeing the brunette dart into the nearest bathroom. When Brittany entered the bathroom she could hear the sound of someone vomiting. There was only one stall in the bathroom that was in use and Brittany knocked gently on the door.

"Natasha? Honey?" she called softly. "It's me, Brittany Pierce." The only response she got was a pained moan and the sound of Natasha dry heaving. Brittany looked at the latch on the door. It was one of those flimsy ones that you turned on the inside and the slider changed from green 'Vacant' to red 'Engaged' on the outside. She used her thumb to slide the sign back and unlock the door. She slipped into the stall and Natasha managed a weak glare from where she was hunched over the toilet, still carefully holding onto her ribs.

"Get out," she whispered.

"But you're hurt. I want to help you," Brittany told her, confused as to why the girl didn't want her to help.

"Brittany-," Natasha warned.

"Did you hurt your side when he pushed you?" Brittany ignored the warning and crouched next to the girl she reached toward the hem of her Cheerios top.

"No!" Natasha flinched away from her, gasping at the pain the movement caused.

"Let me see," Brittany told her.

"No," Natasha repeated.

"Natasha if you don't let me see I'll tell the nurse," Brittany threatened.

"It's nothing," Natasha told her, her eyes pleaded with Brittany not to make her show her. "I fell down at a party on the weekend. I was drunk. I hit my ribs," she said softly.

"Please let me see? I won't tell anyone. Promise," Brittany told her, smiling softly. She reached for the hem of her top again. This time Natasha didn't resist, she just turned her head to stare at the wall of the stall as Brittany lifted her top.

"Natasha! Oh my god," Brittany breathed. Natasha's whole left side was black, blue and purple, there was a couple of dark red patches over a couple of her ribs. "I think you might have broken ribs," she told the girl, gently smoothing her top back down, careful not to touch her bruises.

"They're not broken," Natasha mumbled. "The doctor said they're just bruised."

Brittany reached into her backpack and pulled out an instant cold pack. She activated it and handed it to Natasha who took it and gingerly pressed it to the spot where the pain was at its worst. Brittany continued to root around in her bag until she found some pain medication. She held that out to Natasha too and the girl managed a smile. She slowly and painfully stood up and went to the sink, cupping some water in her hands and swallowing the pills. When she stood up straight Brittany was standing behind her. The tall girl handed her a stick of gum to help get the sour taste out of her mouth and smiled sweetly before reaching to tug the elastic out of Natasha's hair. She scraped the girl's dark hair back into her usual neat ponytail and secured it with the elastic tie again.

"There," she beamed, admiring her handiwork.

"Thanks," Natasha smiled a little back.

"Your hair is so soft. It's like, as soft as my cat's fur. But I don't think you're a spy," Brittany frowned when she remembered her suspicions about Charity the cat.

"Thank you Brittany," Natasha fought to keep the baffled look off of her face at the blonde girl's statement. Brittany just beamed again.

"C'mon, I'll walk you to your locker," Brittany told her.

As they walked back to Natasha's locker, Brittany felt worry build up in her stomach. She had let the small girl think that she believed her story about falling down at a party to make her feel better, hell she had been trying to make herself believe it since she had seen the bruises. But the reality was she didn't believe it…not for a moment.

Glee!

Thanks for reading. If you have time reviews would be lovely. It's nice to know what people think, if they like it, love it, have any ideas to make it better… Hoping to get the next chapter up this weekend since I intend to spend said weekend bumming around at my dad's and doing very little…


	4. Chapter 03

Appearances

**A/N: **Brittany is concerned, Santana is not. Natasha is still a pain in the ass but has a little breakthrough…I hope you enjoy!

Thanks to all who have read so far and to all who have favourite, alerted and reviewed.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Glee. If I did Brittany would have thrown herself at Santana rather than shooting her down…rant over. I also don't own any songs used in this story...

Glee!

Chapter 03:

Brittany had no idea what was going on in the movie they were watching. It must have been funny though, since Santana and Quinn were cracking up every few minutes. Usually Brittany loved Will Ferrell but today she just couldn't pay attention. Her mind kept drifting to Natasha. She was really worried about the girl. She was sure that all that bruising on her side couldn't have come from just falling down drunk. Brittany had done that more times than she could count and she had hurt herself a few times and had never had bruises that bad. It would have to have been a hell of a fall to cause such extensive bruising. Brittany was almost certain that Natasha was lying to her about how she had gotten hurt…

Brittany was pulled from her reverie when Quinn stood up and stretched.

"You staying for another movie Tubbers or have we worn you out?" Santana ribbed the blonde, who gave her a filthy look at the word 'Tubbers' then broke into a smile. Brittany smiled too. Ever since their secretly choreographed plan to get Quinn back to Captaining the Cheerios, Quinn and Santana had slipped back into being close friends. It made Brittany happy that they were getting along again. It had upset her so much having to play piggy-in-the-middle between them all of the time.

"I'm gonna call it a night," Quinn told her friends. "You ok B? You've been very quiet tonight," she said to the taller blonde.

"I'm fine. Just a little tired," Brittany told her with a smile.

"You sure?" Quinn asked, frowning. Even when she was totally exhausted Brittany was usually a lot more bubbly, talkative and 'with it' than she had been tonight.

"Yeah," Brittany nodded.

"Ok," Quinn decided to leave it alone for now. "Well I'm outta here," she told her friends.

"See you on Monday Q," Santana stood, pulling the blonde in for a quick hug. Quinn was surprised, Santana wasn't generally someone who liked or initiated physical contact, but she automatically hugged the Latina back.

"Bye Q," Quinn wasn't surprised in the slightest by the tight, warm, almost smothering hug and kiss on the cheek she received from Brittany.

"See ya," Quinn carefully extricated herself from the taller blondes arms, and headed out of the Lopez' living room, letting herself out of the front door as she always did.

Back in the living room, Santana turned the TV and DVD player off and moved to sit next to Brittany on the couch. She held up her hand, pinky extended and Brittany linked hers around it, pulling the Latinas hand to rest in her lap, and dropping her head onto her shoulder.

"What's wrong Britt-Britt?" Santana asked gently.

"Nothing," Brittany replied, the edge to her voice not going unnoticed by her best friend. Santana shifted, gently nudging Brittany's head off of her shoulder so that she could turn and actually see the girl's face.

"Britt, we're best friends. I know when you're not ok, and right now? You're not ok," Santana told her. She frowned when Brittany's sea-blue eyes filled with tears, which began running down her cheeks.

"I still want to be your friend San! I don't want to lose you!" Brittany cried, throwing her arms around a startled Santana's neck, burying her face in her shoulder.

"Britt, why would I stop being your friend?" Santana asked, gently rubbing the distraught girls back.

"Because…because I have to look out for her!" Brittany replied cryptically.

"Look out for who?" Santana asked, pulling back to look at Brittany's tear stained face.

"Natasha," Brittany whispered, refusing to look Santana in the eye.

"Ugh," Santana scoffed, reaching out to wipe Brittany's tears away.

"San, she was really hurt today," Brittany finally made eye contact, her blue eyes pleading with Santana's dark brown ones. Santana frowned.

"What do you mean really hurt?" she asked sharply.

"Karofsky pushed her into her locker and she bumped her ribs and she _screamed_," Brittany told Santana, her eyes wide and worried. "Then she fell down and she was crying, so I went to her. She ran away into the bathroom so I followed her. She was throwing up. I went into the stall and made her show me her side. She was bruised from here to here," Brittany gestured to her own body to show Santana how extensive bruising was. "It was black and purple and there were red marks over two of her ribs. I told her I thought they might be broken but she said the doctor said that they were just badly bruised-," Santana cut Brittany off gently.

"Did she tell you what happened?" Santana asked.

"She said she fell down when she was drunk," Brittany told her. She hesitated before adding; "I don't believe her San, I think someone did that to her."

"Honey maybe someone did, but Natasha likes to fight. She probably got drunk, picked a fight with the wrong person and got her skinny ass handed to her. You've seen her when she's drunk Britt. She's probably just embarrassed that she got beat and that's why she wouldn't tell you the truth. Like I said, she's a moron who enjoys hitting people," Santana told Brittany gently. Brittany nodded slowly. They had seen the new girl drunk a couple of weeks back and, if it was even possible, she was twice as aggressive drunk, than she was sober. She had tried to pick a fight with another Cheerio's cousin and Puck and Finn had ended up having to lock her in Puck's truck until she settled down a bit so Finn could drive her home.

"Maybe…" Brittany said quietly.

"Probably," Santana said firmly. Brittany looked up at her sadly.

"San if I keep an eye on her at school, does that mean we can't be friends," the blonde asked in a tiny, childlike voice. Santana took in Brittany's heartbroken expression and sighed, pulling her close for a hug.

"Of course not Britt. We will always be friends, no matter what. You keeping an eye on the moron isn't going to change that," Santana whispered. She ducked her head and began planting soft, comforting kisses along the column of the other girl's neck. She heard Brittany sigh softly and then the blonde angled her neck to give Santana better access. Santana kissed up to her jaw then brushed a couple of light, sweet kisses across her lips. The Lopez' front door opened then and the two pulled apart, smiling contentedly.

"Hey girls," Louisa Lopez smiled as she walked into the living room. She kissed both girls foreheads in greeting.

"Hi Louisa!"

"Hey Mom."

Louisa smiled as the two girls spoke at the same time.

"Are you staying for dinner tonight Miss Britt?" she asked the blonde brightly.

"Yes she is," Santana answered for her. "She's staying the night."

Glee!

"Natasha you need to contribute now. You have had your grace week but now you need to start acting like a part of this club," Mr Schuester told the furious looking Cheerleader at Glee on Monday.

"I don't want to," Natasha snarled back at him.

"Well Natasha what you want to do went out the window when you picked that last fight with Santana," Mr Schue told her. "You either contribute to Glee Club or you get suspended. Like I said last time we discussed this; those are your options. It's your choice." Natasha just glared at him. He sighed again and then went back to discussing potential songs for Regionals.

"Can't sing huh?" Puck leaned over and whispered to Natasha.

"I can sing better than you," she snarled back.

"Sure you can. That's why you refuse to get up there and perform," Puck continued to push her.

"Fuck off Puckerman!" Natasha growled.

"NATASHA!" Mr Schue yelled. The entire Glee Club shrank back into their chairs, Natasha included. Mr Schue had never yelled like that before. He seemed to realise that he had lost control and reigned his temper in. "I'm sorry guys," he apologised to the silent group. He turned to Natasha; "Natasha, enough with the back talk, enough with the language, enough with the bad attitude. You clearly don't want to be suspended because you keep coming back here but if you don't overhaul the attitude then you will be out. Ok?" he told her as calmly as he could manage.

"She just does it because she's got no talent other than flashing her undies during cheerleading routines," Puck said mockingly.

"Hey!" Quinn and Brittany cried indignantly. Santana just scoffed and rolled her eyes at the mohawked boy. They all looked warily at Natasha waiting for a response, or a violent physical assault on Puck.

"You know what Puckerman? Give me your guitar," she demanded, her eyes dark with fury.

"No," Puck said nervously.

"I'm not going to break it asshole!" she snapped. "Sorry," she shot sullenly at Mr Schue before he could reprimand her for her language. "Give it," she held out her hand for the instrument and Puck hesitantly handed it over. "Pick?" she asked, holding out her other hand, Puck handed that over too. "Thank you," she said, glaring.

She moved to one of the stools and perched on the edge, settling the guitar in place. The other members of the club leaned closer as she began to play. Tina was the first to recognise the song and jumped up, going to the piano to accompany the girl on the guitar. Natasha sent a surprised half-smile her way. After a few bars Natasha opened her mouth and began to sing.

_I linger in the doorway,_

_Of alarm clock screaming monsters calling my name,_

_Let me stay where the wind will whisper to me,_

_Where the raindrops as they're falling, tell a story,_

_In my field of paper flowers,_

_And candy clouds of lullaby, _

_I lie inside myself for hours,_

_And watch my purple sky fly over me._

_Don't say I'm out of touch,_

_With this rampant chaos – your reality,_

_I know well what lies beyond my sleeping refuge,_

_The nightmare I built my own world to escape._

_In my field of paper flowers,_

_And candy clouds of lullaby, _

_I lie inside myself for hours,_

_And watch my purple sky fly over me._

_Swallowed up in the sound of my screaming,_

_Cannot cease for the fear of silent nights,_

_Oh how I long for the deep sleep dreaming,_

_The Goddess of imaginary light._

_In my field of paper flowers,_

_And candy clouds of lullaby, _

_I lie inside myself for hours,_

_And watch my purple sky fly over me._

Natasha played the last few bars of the song then stood abruptly, thrusting the guitar and pick back at Puck.

"Satisfied?" she looked at him and then at Mr Schue before stomping back to her chair and flopping into it, resuming her customary sulking.

"Satisfied?" Mr Schue said incredulously. He moved to crouch in front of the girl. "Natasha you have an absolutely amazing voice. My God you blew me away, I think you blew all of us away!" he told her gently. For the first time since he had met Natasha she smiled, a tiny but genuine smile.

"Really?" she asked softly.

"Really!" Puck grinned at her. "Dude you sounded awesome up there! You're like, as good as Berry!"

"I don't know about that," she said, glancing at Rachel who looked indignant at the idea of anyone being as good as her. Mr Schue stood, giving Natasha's shoulder a gentle squeeze before heading back to the front of the room.

"That was so pretty Natasha," Brittany was looking at the girl adoringly. Natasha blushed and stared at her feet as the group began to praise her.

"You like Evanescence too?" Tina asked, sliding over to sit next to Natasha.

"I love them. Amy Lee is brilliant," Natasha said softly before clamming up again. She was a little overwhelmed by the attention and praise she was receiving right now. She hadn't actually performed in front of anyone since she had dropped out of her Church Choir about three years before they moved to Lima.

She sat next to Tina for the rest of the lesson, still silent as usual but no longer sulking.

Brittany watched the girl carefully, wondering why she had picked that particular song and if anyone else in the room had noticed the pained and frightened look in her eyes during the last lines of the second verse.

…_I know well what lies beyond my sleeping refuge, the nightmare I built my own world to escape…_

Glee!

Thanks for taking the time to read. Feedback is much appreciated.

Song is 'Imaginary' By Evanescence – which I unequivocally do not own. I am merely borrowing.


	5. Chapter 04

Appearances

**A/N: **Brittany can't let go of her concern, it's driving Santana nuts so Brittany finds someone else to talk to...

I am trying really hard with this story to write more in depth. I am shocking for writing fast paced, minimally detailed and very short chapters and am trying hard to get out of that habit. I've been averaging about 2200 words per chapter on this story - this one is about 2500 without the authors notes and am feeling like i am making progess. but if someone has the time can you review and let me know: does this story feel rushed? do the chapters seem really short or are they ok? am i giving enough/too little detail? I'm personally feeling like i'm doing better on this but it would be nice to know what other people think. I find i am enjoying the process much more when im slowing it down and getting deeper into it so hopefully you guys are too ;-)

Thanks to all who have read so far and to all who have favourite, alerted and reviewed.

Glee!

Chapter 04:

Quinn huffed and stared at the clock in Mr Schuester's Spanish room. She was sure it was taking twice as long as usual for this class to be over. She glanced over at Brittany whose mind was clearly floating somewhere near the exosphere, the entire lesson going completely over her head. Quinn had been waiting since Friday night to get the girl alone to talk to her and today the opportunity had presented itself. Sue Sylvester had actually called off Cheerios practice in favour of carrying out her latest half-cocked revenge scheme against local news anchor Rod Remington, so Santana had ditched last period Spanish and gone home. Quinn couldn't blame her really. Spanish was Santana's first language and she only took the class so that Brittany wouldn't fail it miserably. Quinn let out a huge sigh of relief when the bell finally rang.

"Hey Britt, want to go to the park with me? I'll drop you at Santana's after if you like?" Quinn asked the other girl with a smile. Brittany's face lit up like Christmas.

"Yes, yes, yes, yes!" Brittany clapped her hands then threw her arms around Quinn, almost knocking them both to the floor. Quinn had to laugh at the childish excitement from the taller girl. "I'll text San and tell her I'm going to be late to hers," Brittany whipped out her phone as they headed to their lockers.

"Hey Britt," Natasha smiled as she passed them at Brittany's locker, "Quinn," she sent a small smile to the head cheerleader as she passed her too.

"Hi Natasha!" Britt replied happily, Quinn just smiled warmly.

"Quinn?" Brittany said softly, suddenly sounding like a lost little girl.

"Yeah Britt?" Quinn turned to the other girl, frowning.

"Do you know my locker combo? I got excited and I forgot it again," Brittany said sadly, her cheeks pink with embarrassment. Quinn just smiled in sympathy and opened the blonde's locker for her. Santana had given Quinn Brittany's combo for situations just like this. "Thanks," Brittany smiled happily, previous embarrassment forgotten.

Glee!

At the park Brittany made a beeline for the swings, her favourite thing at the park. Quinn slipped into the swing next to her, not swinging, just trying to figure out how to start the conversation she needed to have with Brittany. Brittany swung as high as she could before jumping off at the highest point of the swing, landing catlike in the grass, laughing gleefully.

"Come on Q, you have to try it!" at Quinn's dubious look she frowned. "I'll catch you if you're scared?" she offered sweetly.

"Mmm I don't think so Britt. Coach Sylvester will kill me if I break myself…or you," Quinn told her. Brittany looked disappointed, but accepted Quinn's flimsy excuse. Quinn decided to bite the bullet and ask what she needed to ask. "Brittany, you've been quiet lately. Is something wrong?" she asked in a rush. Brittany immediately looked at the ground.

"No," she whispered.

"Brittany, I know something is wrong. Please tell me, maybe I can help?" Quinn stood from her swing and moved in front of Brittany, tilting her chin up with her fingers to try and catch her eyes. Brittany captured Quinn's hand in her own and tugged her over to a park bench. They sat down side by side and Quinn shifted to face Brittany.

"I'm worried," Brittany said simply, her eyes deeply troubled.

"About school? Santana? Your family?" Quinn pressed gently.

"About Natasha," Brittany replied.

"Natasha Isaacs?" Quinn asked.

"Yeah," Brittany wouldn't look at Quinn. Quinn reached over and took both of the girl's hands in hers.

"How come?" Quinn asked. Brittany didn't answer and Quinn started to really worry about her usually bubbly, happy friend. "Brittany, honey, why are you worried about Natasha?"

"San says if I care about Natasha then I'm a loser and I can't hang out with you and her anymore," Brittany whispered.

"Brittany that is not true. She just told you that so that you wouldn't make friends with her. Santana hates Natasha because she feels threatened by her," Quinn told Brittany sternly. She was furious inside. Santana did a fantastic job of protecting Brittany from people who wanted to ridicule her or use her due to her simplicity, but Quinn couldn't believe that she had the audacity to use that same simplicity for her own gain.

"Someone is hurting her!" Brittany blurted interrupting Quinn's thoughts.

"Hurting Santana?" Quinn lost track of the conversation.

"No. Not San, Natasha," Brittany told her. She looked up at Quinn, her face desperately worried.

"Brittany what happened to make you think that?" Quinn asked. Brittany sighed deeply and tightened her grip on Quinn's hands before launching into the story of Natasha's run in with Karofsky and what she had seen in the girls' bathroom.

"I tried to believe her Quinn but I just don't! I just can't because those red marks looked like fist marks! And San says she probably just got in a drunk fight and got her ass kicked but I can't believe that either! When she sang that song in Glee, I could see this look in her eyes, like she was trying to tell us something without actually telling us. I know I'm not smart Quinn but I know how to see people. Really see them. But Natasha is hiding so far inside of herself that even I can't really see her!" Brittany dissolved into sobs and Quinn shifted to cuddle her close, Brittany's arms immediately wrapping tightly around her friend's neck as she buried her face in Quinn's shoulder.

"Aw Britt, how long have you been hanging onto this?" she whispered, more to herself than the other girl. She dropped a kiss onto Brittany's soft blonde hair and rubbed her back until the other girl stopped crying.

"What do we do Quinn?" Brittany asked helplessly, pulling away from Quinn to wipe her eyes and straighten her ponytail.

"Sweetheart I honestly don't know," Quinn reached back to release her own ponytail so she could run her fingers through her long blonde hair. She was stumped as to what to do. Brittany read people like Quinn would read a novel so if she thought that something was wrong; chances were high that something was wrong. But other than Brittany's superior people-reading skills, they had little evidence of anything. "I knew something was wrong with her this last week, she's been stiff at practices, guarding that side with her arm…she's just lucky that Coach Sylvester has been so preoccupied with her revenge that she hasn't noticed she's off form," Quinn ran her hand through her hair again.

"Why does Coach Sylvester want revenge on Rod Remington anyway?" Brittany asked.

"Who knows?" Quinn shrugged and rolled her eyes. "He probably parked too close to her Le Car or something equally ridiculous."

"Yeah," Brittany smiled a little.

"Britt I think that we just need to keep an eye on Natasha. If you make friends with her I'm sure Santana will grudgingly be friends with her too. Just be there for her and maybe she will trust you enough to let you in. But if she isn't ready then she won't admit to anything. If anything like her side happens again then you and I will go to Coach Sylvester or Mr Schue together and tell them what's going on ok?" Quinn told Brittany, taking her hand again.

"Ok," Brittany beamed, pleased that someone else was on her side now and that they had a plan of action. At least now she didn't feel quite so helpless.

"Now come here," Quinn stood, pulling Brittany with her and into her arms, her chin resting on Brittany's shoulder. "Try not to worry too much ok? And stop listening to Santana when she tells you who you can and can't be friends with!" she scolded lightly. "She loves you too much to not be friends with you because you make friends with someone else," she said as she pulled away, brushing Brittany's bangs out of her eyes.

"Ok Quinn," Brittany smiled happily before suddenly leaning in to kiss Quinn's cheek. Quinn returned Brittany's happy smile.

"Now I'd better get you to Santana's before she comes looking for us," she told Brittany.

"Ok. You should come and watch a movie with us!" Brittany said excitedly as she bounced beside Quinn on the way to the car.

"I don't know Britt, I think Santana wants you alone tonight after I crashed your last movie night," Quinn replied.

"Oh it's ok; we're not going to have sex tonight!" Brittany replied enthusiastically.

"Wait, what? You and Santana have sex?" Quinn's eyebrows were at her hairline, her hazel eyes almost bugging out of her head. She knew the two girls were close but she'd had no idea that their relationship was sexual.

"Yeah, but we're not dating," Brittany said brightly, before bounding around to the passenger side of Quinn's car, leaving a stunned Quinn behind her.

Glee!

"So what song do you want to do?" Natasha asked Rachel that Friday. Mr Schue had decided to split them into pairs (and one group of three) and told them to do a number together. The catch was that he had mostly paired them up with people they wouldn't usually pair with in Glee. Santana had been paired with Mike, Brittany with Tina, Artie, Finn and new girl Lauren, Puck and Sam, Quinn and Mercedes and he had paired Rachel with Natasha, much to Rachel's blatant disgust.

"I have a list prepared right here," Rachel pulled out her list and held it toward the other girl like a peace offering. Natasha had insisted they go into the auditorium to work out their song. Rachel had hesitantly agreed, sure the girl was going to do something to her once she had her alone. Ever since Natasha had approached her at her locker she had been waiting for the other girl's attack. She had never felt so threatened at school. Santana, Quinn and their cronies were fairly predictable with their torture, the name calling and the slushies and the offensive, rude and/or insulting comments. She didn't necessarily know when it was coming but she always knew what. With this girl she had no idea. She had spent the last two weeks creeping around the school, keeping her head low and just waiting for whatever Natasha had planned. She was afraid to leave her house in the morning. She figured that this must have been how Kurt had felt at this school.

"Oh, there's some cool songs on this list," Natasha smiled approvingly. "What about Fallen by Sarah McLachlan? You could do lead vocals and I could do backing vocals and play the guitar? Or Lithium by Evanescence and I could back you and play piano?" she suggested, Natasha was watching the girl beside her intently. She seemed afraid of her and Natasha had no clue why. She hoped offering the girl the lead would help her a bit. It was the best she could do, she would have offered to do a show tune…but she couldn't handle show tunes.

"Um maybe the Sarah McLachlan one?" Rachel said shakily. She flinched when Natasha turned in her seat to stare at Rachel.

"Are you afraid of me?" Natasha asked curiously, cocking her head to one side. Rachel shifted away from her slightly.

"No. Uh uh," Rachel shook her head, trying not to show the girl any fear. Natasha frowned.

"Rachel, I find it hard to believe that you aren't afraid of me when you are pushing yourself as far away from me as you can, and you're shaking. You flinch when I get too close, like you think I'm going to hit you or something…Why are you afraid of me? I haven't done anything!" Rachel was surprised to see that Natasha actually looked upset. Rachel felt tears spring to her eyes, the fear and worry of the last couple of weeks catching up to her and overwhelming her.

"You're a Cheerio! They're all horrible to me! They make my life a living hell here! They call me names, they insult me, they throw slushies in my face! They're horrible! They don't speak to me on principle, and when they do? They're always planning something humiliating and mean. You're one of them. You're being nice to me and I want to know why? What are you planning to do to me? I know you're planning something so don't tell me you're not! I've been terrified to come to school for the last few weeks because I'm so afraid of whatever you are going to do me!" Rachel stopped for breath and to wipe at the tears streaming down her cheeks and Natasha was stunned. The girl's usual thesaurus sized words had, for the most part, gone out of the window. She saw Rachel draw in a deep breath and open her mouth to start talking again.

"Stop," she said gently. Rachel's mouth snapped shut and she started trembling, whether it was from fear, other emotions or both Natasha didn't know. "Rachel I am sorry. I never meant to scare you so badly. I watched you in Glee that day and I…I was intrigued by you, by your passion for Glee Club. I introduced myself because Mr Schue always says that Glee are a family and then I got scared, I was aggressive and a pain the ass in Glee because I was afraid of people knowing who I am," Natasha sucked in a breath and slowly shuffled closer to Rachel, who froze, staring at the Cheerleader in terror. Natasha reached up and released her dark hair from its tight ponytail, letting it loose to fall over her shoulders, that small lapse in the uniform almost made the girl seem less threatening to Rachel. "I guess…well I don't think I owe you an explanation. I don't owe anyone here anything. But..." Natasha looked at Rachel with teary eyes. "Maybe it'll reassure you that I'm not out to get you. I don't want you to be afraid like that," she whispered. She let her hair fall forward, blocking her face from Rachel's view so that the other girl couldn't see the emotion there. "At my old school…I was a bully. I wasn't one of the leaders but I unquestioningly carried out orders from our head cheerleader – we had our own version of Quinn, Santana and Brittany and if you think they're bad…" Natasha shuddered. "Popularity meant everything to me. So I just blindly did as I was told, despite my misgivings. Despite how it made me feel dead inside. We picked on a lot of people but one girl in particular. Rachel…it ended…," Natasha let out a small, choked sob and Rachel felt the fear inside of her dissipate a little. "It ended horrifically. That's why I came here. My Mom thought I deserved a fresh start. I don't deserve that at all but I am going to make the most of it. I swore to myself, to God, that I would never go back to that," Natasha lifted her tearstained face to meet Rachel's eyes. "I picked all those fights with Santana to prove that I won't be pushed around by them, I won't blindly do their bidding," she admitted. "Rachel we run in different social circles, we'll probably never be much more than fellow Glee Clubber's but I can promise you, with everything that I have, that I will never, ever be your bully." Natasha dropped her head into her hands, emotions from the past all coming down on her at once; she struggled desperately to contain them all. She was so focused on hanging onto her emotions that she jumped at the feel of a small hand landing on her back.

"What happened to her?" the voice asked softly.

"I…I…can't Rachel," Natasha whispered.

"It was bad?" Rachel asked.

"It was horrific. I'm a fucking monster," Natasha whispered brokenly. "Can…can we just pick a song and practice? Please Rachel?" she pleaded.

"Sure," Rachel agreed. She was still a little afraid that this might have all been part of an act but she didn't think even Meryl Streep could act the kind of emotion she had seen in Natasha's eyes.

Glee!

A/N2: I'm posting another chapter after this tonight because I've been home sick all day and figured these two chapters would benefit from me being in a miserable mood while I wrote them. Best not to get used to the updates coming so fast though. I will probably be back to updating roughly once a week after this. Thanks again to everyone who has alerted, favourited and reviewed. It makes me so happy to know that people are enjoying this little tale of mine :-)


	6. Chapter 05

Appearances

**A/N: ****Gets a bit dark and graphic in this chapter. Addresses some of the themes I mentioned in the warning on Chapter one.**A look into Natasha's past…I am unfamiliar with any laws in the states around some of the stuff in this chapter but where I live legally there is little anyone can do in this type of situation so I'm going with that for the purposes of this story.

Glee!

Chapter Five:

Rachel lay on her bed, sneaking peeks at her computer. She was reeling a little from the afternoon she had spent with Natasha in the auditorium that day. After Natasha's semi-confession the girl had dived into the project with a focus that even Rachel herself had envied. Natasha had made a lot of small talk, trying to distract herself and Rachel it seemed. Rachel had asked some questions back and had found out that while Natasha still did voice training she rarely sang in front of people anymore. She had been in choirs at her church since she was five up until three years ago; first she had been in the Sunday School Choir then the main Church Choir. She played electric and acoustic guitar, was a beautiful pianist (she had proven that to Rachel on the piano in the auditorium), she claimed to be equally as good on the violin - her favourite instrument – and she had done flute lessons for a few months at her mother's insistence. She had hated flute though, she had hated it so much she had gotten herself thrown out by her teacher for threatening to shove the instrument where the sun didn't shine after said teacher yelled at her for not practicing enough.

But through it all Rachel couldn't stop thinking about Natasha's words…what it was that she had done at her old school? What had she done that had been bad enough for her to refer to herself as 'a fucking monster'? Rachel was curious and at the same time she wasn't sure she wanted to know. One of her Daddy's favourite lectures kept winding its way through her thoughts _"Curiosity is a double edged sword baby girl, sometimes you find out great things but just as often you find out things you'd be much better off not knowing."_ He loved to tell her that when she was so desperate to know things. Rachel flopped onto her back and stared at the ceiling. She knew full well that this would be one of those things she'd probably be much better off not knowing but Natasha's broken claim of being "a fucking monster" was haunting her every move. What could they have done that was so terrible? Rachel's head was spinning, Natasha's words and a million questions floating through it over and over…

"…_Rachel…It ended…It ended horrifically…"_

How did it end? How badly could it have ended?

"_..I'm a monster…"_

But why? What could they have done?

"…_It ended horrifically…"_

"…_I'm a monster…"_

"…_I swore to myself, to God, that I would never go back to that…"_

"…_I'm a monster…"_

"…_I was a bully…"_

"…_I'm a monster…"_

"…_Popularity meant everything to me…"_

"…_I'm a monster…"_

"…_I just blindly did what I was told…"_

"…_I'm a monster…"_

"…_I'll never, ever be your bully…"_

"…_I'm a fucking monster…"_

"Damn it!" Rachel snarled. She sat up, throwing her pillow at her bedroom door. She hauled herself off of her bed and went to her computer, switching it on. Once the computer had booted up she opened her browser and clicked onto Google. She sat, fingers poised over the keyboard still trying to decide if she really wanted to know.

"…_I'm a fucking monster…"_

Rachel took a deep breath, blowing it out through her teeth in a hiss. She typed "Natasha Isaacs + Cheerleading" into the search bar and hit enter before she could change her mind. The first page seemed to be some kind of official site for the 'Raglan County High School Amazons'. Almost all of the rest were various online articles about the disbanding of the Amazons and the events leading up to it. One link jumped out at Rachel and she clicked on it. It seemed to be a site about bullying in American high schools. The page it had gone into was simply titled "Ella Farthington's Story by Lorraine Farthington". Rachel began to read…

_My daughter Ella was a bright, happy, loving girl who adored everything to do with computers. She had lots of friends and was close with her cousins who lived nearby. She had such a passion for life and everything it entailed. Then she started at Raglan County High School…Most of her friends had gone to another school and Ella had pleaded with me to let her go with them instead of going to Raglan…but Raglan had a better computer program and computer related extracurricular activities. When I told Ella this she smiled and told me she guessed it was a fair trade and hey, she would still see her friends on the weekends…God I just wish I had stopped thinking about College opportunities and let her join her friends. 9 months after she started at Raglan County High, my beautiful, loving daughter was dead, she killed herself at the age of 16 because of the bullying – or torture – she suffered at the hands of the Raglan County High School cheer squad, The Amazons. What these girls did to my precious child was revolting. I will never forgive them for taking my world away, for absolutely no reason. I cannot understand why they did this to her, a girl they had never met, who did nothing to them…why her? What would possess a group of teenagers to do the things they did to anyone? I want to blame their parents but I see their faces and I know that they are almost as shocked and stunned as I am. No words can explain the feelings I have…People think I am crazy for this but it came as a surprise to me also, to find comfort in the fact that, despite it coming too late, one member of this so-called Cheer squad defied the peer pressure from the rest of the girls and tried to save my daughter's life that night. I don't forgive this girl for her actions toward my daughter but it comforts me to know that she doesn't forgive herself either. I guess I feel this way because of her remorse and her honesty in admitting that she was pressured to do what she did, pressured not forced, and that she should have stopped it. Most of the others just blamed the three ringleaders and said they were forced into doing it and refused to acknowledge that they were at fault…I miss my sweet girl every day and I'd give anything to have her back…I'd give __everything__ to have her back. _

Rachel clicked out of the page feeling shell shocked. It didn't answer the question of what the squad had done but she now knew what Natasha meant by it ending horrifically. She started clicking on the news articles. She was in horrified tears by the end of the first one. She read for hours and hours, most of the articles all said the same things but some gave extra details. Rachel wished she could stop reading but she wanted to know the whole story. It was one in the morning when she picked up her pillow and cuddled it to her chest as she stared at the computer screen which was displaying the last article she had been reading.

Natasha had been a junior Amazon, under the "command" of Captain Zara Campbell, Co-captain Keylani Mathieson and third-in-charge Hannah Johannsen. They had evidently singled out Ella Bridget Farthington because she was a 'computer nerd' and the torture Rachel had been subjected to at the hands of the Cheerios was nothing compared to what this girl had gone through at the hands of the Amazons. In fact Rachel swore to never refer to the Cheerios bullying as 'torture' ever again. Only those three squad members had ever been publicly named; Zara, Hannah and Keylani, as they had been the ones to create and carry out 95% of the bullying of Ella Farthington, and they were the only Amazons ever charged with anything in regards to the bullying. The things they had done to that poor girl were horrifying. Every day they had locked her inside her own locker for hours, purely because they knew she was severely claustrophobic and terrified of small spaces, they issued death threats weekly, in texts, on Facebook, in notes pushed through the vents of her locker and in person, they had had members of the football team bail her up, blindfold her and hold her captive for hours, taunting her and pretending that they were going to rape her – this had happened three separate times, they stole her books, clothes and possessions and destroyed them, they would take her spare clothes then tip soda over her, leaving her with no choice but to sit in sticky, wet clothes till the end of the day. They pushed her, called her names, insulted her in every which way that they could. From what Rachel had read the Zara-Keylani-Hannah trio had been the main instigators and the jocks had done the grunt work while the rest of the squad had done the lion's share of the name calling and the insults.

Then there was their pièce de résistance, they had grabbed her as she left school, held her down, stripped her naked and tied her hands and feet to the handrail of the steps leading into the school. They had written the words 'Fat ugly loser' all over her body with permanent sharpie markers. They had taken photos and emailed them to every student in the school. Someone had let her go a few hours later, an unknown member of the squad. Ella had returned to school for three weeks after the incident, keeping her head down, pretending she was ok. Then one night when she knew that the Amazons were busy desecrating her Facebook page she had emailed a link to a live streaming video to every member of the Amazons. The only words she had spoken were "I wanted you bitches to see what you have done to me." before she had stabbed herself in the chest for the world to see. The reports, like Ella's mother's piece on the bullying page, said that a member of the squad had defied Zara's callous order to 'let her die' and rushed to the girl in an attempt to save her life, but she had been too late to save her and she had died in her arms, minutes after she had arrived. They never named that girl, but had quoted her describing herself as "an absolute monster of a human being" and that she would "never, ever be anywhere close to worthy of the Farthington family's forgiveness." She was also quoted as saying: "I will carry this with me for the rest of my life, the knowledge that I could have stopped this. I will never, ever forgive myself for what I have done."

The three girls and three members of the football team had been expelled from the school immediately and charged and convicted of assault for the tying up incident but in regards to the girl's death there was nothing they could charge them with. Legally there had been precious little they could do in the case. Aside from the six charged with assault , the football team and the Amazons had been granted name suppression from the courts, not that it did any good with the names of the high school, the football team and the cheerleading squad already released…

Rachel clicked the x to close the window and took a shaky breath. She decided to check her emails again before she went to bed. Her inbox showed 5 new messages but only one caught her attention. The email address read Tash_B_. She opened the message which contained only five words: _'I know. I'm a monster...'_One of those five words was all it took to confirm to Rachel who the unnamed cheerleader quoted in the articles was. She hit reply and paused for several minutes, trying to find an appropriate response.

_'Natasha, 'monster' implies that one does horrible things without thought or conscience. Unlike those three girls you feel remorse and regret and pain for what you did. You helped to do horrible things to that girl by not stopping what was going on, that is a fact that cannot be denied...but you take responsibility for your actions. You admit to what you did and you hate yourself for it. But you are not a monster. -Rachel'_

She waited a few minutes for a reply but none came. She logged off and went to get ready for bed and when she came back from her bathroom her phone was flashing to say she had 2 text messages. She didn't recognise the number but when she read the first message she knew who they were from: _'Thanks for trying, Rachel, but I know what I am.' _The second read: _'I got your number from Britt Pierce, in case you were wondering.'_ Rachel wondered briefly how the hell Brittany had gotten hold of her number. For someone who came across so…simple the girl was friggin sneaky when she wanted something.

Rachel stared at her phone a while, trying to come up with a reply but she didn't know that there was anything to say to Natasha to convince her that she had done horrible things but that she was not the real monster in all of this. One of the articles had explicitly stated that even when they had stripped the girl and tied her up that most of the Squad wasn't actually there, it had been three members of the football team and the three girls, the rest of the squad knew but they hadn't actually been there. As far as Rachel could tell Natasha hadn't done anything much worse than Quinn, Santana and Brittany had done to her over the years. She guessed that she was feeling guiltier over knowing what else was happening and not doing anything than she was about what she had actually done to the girl, unless there was something else she didn't know. Rachel gave up on texting back and lay down in her bed. Sleep didn't come easy to Rachel that night.

Glee!

Natasha lay in her bed that night, clinging tightly to the teddy bear her little sister had brought for her to cuddle when she had heard her crying through their shared wall. She wondered what Rachel was thinking right now. The girl had tried to convince her that she wasn't a monster. But how could she not be? She had called poor Ella Farthington names, she had insulted her every single day she had been at school, and she was awful to her…and worst of all she knew what those bitches were doing to her. And she hadn't stopped it. She thought back to that night that Zara, Keylani, Hannah and their boyfriends had tied her up. She had seen the photos in her email that night and had immediately snuck out of the house to make sure they had let the poor girl go. She couldn't believe it when she found her, sobbing, naked and freezing, still tied up. They'd even taken her clothes away with them. The girl had been terrified when Natasha had taken the blindfold off of her and untied her. They had never even spoken a word that night; Natasha had given her the sweatpants and t-shirt that her mom insisted she always kept in her car just in case, to wear and had silently driven her home. The girl had given her a grateful look and Natasha had looked away, ashamed and feeling undeserving of her gratitude.

The day after the girl had died in Natasha's arms, Natasha had received a note from her in the mail. It had taken her six weeks to pluck up the courage to open it. There was only one sentence scrawled in neat handwriting on the little card: _I always knew you were better than the rest of them, thank you for what you did that night. Ella. _It had sent her into sobs so violent that she was sure her chest would burst. How could Ella have thought she was better than the others? Just because she had made sure she was safe once, even after she had done nothing all of those other times? Natasha knew she wasn't better than any of them. Her Papi had always told her that a witness to a crime who carries on as if they never saw a thing is as bad as the person committing the crime. Natasha was that witness and as those girls were monsters, as far as she was concerned she was a monster too.

Natasha rolled over and stared at the little framed card that sat on her bedside table as a reminder, then, clutching her sister's teddy bear tighter to her chest she closed her eyes and listened to that nasty little voice in her head as it chanted _"You're horrible, you're worthless, you're a monster Natasha" _over and over until she slipped into the unfeeling darkness of sleep.

Glee!

Blech. This chapter was unpleasant to write. Had to be done as part of the story but just ugh. I hope you enjoyed it and I can't say that the next few chapters will be a hell of a lot lighter but they probably won't be quite this dark. Thanks for reading and I hope I didn't disappoint.


	7. Chapter 06

Appearances

**A/N: ****Still a bit dark in this chapter…still addressing the abuse angle.**

Glee!

Chapter Six:

"Britt, are you even listening to me right now?" Santana demanded in exasperation in Spanish on Friday. She was trying to re-explain the exercise Mr Schue had just set for them to the blonde who was clearly not paying attention.

"Sorry San," the girl replied, glancing across the room to the empty seat again. She frowned and bit her lip, staring at the seat as though the girl who should be sitting there would magically appear out of thin air.

"Brittany!" Santana shrieked, causing half the class to cower away from her. Brittany turned to face her slowly, blinking in confusion at the other girl's angry face. "For the love of God, where is your head right now?" the frustrated Latina asked.

"On my neck?" Brittany answered vaguely, confusion plastered all over her features.

"I mean why aren't you paying attention to me?" Santana replied, barely able to hold back a bitingly rude remark at Brittany's literal interpretation of her question. Brittany looked desperately past Santana to Quinn, who just gave a gentle smile.

"Natasha isn't at school today," she whispered.

"Maybe she's sick? Or ditching?" Santana suggested, annoyed.

"Maybe," Brittany said softly, glancing back at the empty seat again.

"The freak is fine Brittany, now pay attention would you!" Santana scowled. She looked down at the page and tried to remember where they were up to. Brittany looked over her head at Quinn, who shrugged and gave a half smile. Brittany sighed and tried to pay attention to Santana. She was probably right; Natasha was probably sick or just ditching for the day.

Glee!

Natasha didn't show up for Glee that afternoon either. Rachel had noticed but she guessed that yesterday had dredged up a lot of painful memories and emotions for the girl and that she just needed a little space for today. Or maybe she thought Rachel had told everyone and she was afraid. Either way Rachel wasn't all that concerned over her absence, but she had really wanted to work on their song today and she had to face it, more than that she had really wanted to try and make the girl see that she wasn't the monster she saw herself as. When Rachel got up to speak to the group, she couldn't help but notice Brittany's preoccupation with the other Cheerleader's empty seat. She wondered if Brittany knew about Natasha's past too. She made a mental note to ask the tall blonde about it later, subtly though, in case she actually didn't know.

Santana was getting really annoyed with Brittany's increasing obsession with Natasha Isaacs. At lunch she had tuned Santana out completely, so Santana had come up with a plan to capture her attention. When they had finished eating she had lured Brittany into the bathroom, dragging her into the end stall. Once inside with the door safely locked she had pushed the blonde up against it, attaching her lips to her long pale neck while her hands wandered softly over her body. Brittany's hands had come up to rest on Santana's hips but she had stood there silently, barely reacting at all to Santana's ministrations.

"Damn it Brittany!" Santana had snapped, shoving Brittany out of the way before stalking off, angrily slamming the bathroom door behind her. Sitting there in Glee watching Brittany's anxious face flit back and forward from her phone in her hands to Natasha's empty chair, Santana vowed to smack Natasha's stupid, friend-stealing face off the next time she saw her. How dare she do this to Brittany? She had the poor girl so tied up in knots that she could barely function. Santana pulled her phone out and sent a message to Puck: _Your place, tonight 8pm. _She needed to release some frustration and a quickie with Puck would be enough to hold her over until she could sort Natasha out and untangle Brittany and get her back to her old self again.

Glee!

That night Puck was lying on his bed watching as Santana slowly stripped off her clothes, teasing him. He reached out as she undid the jeans she had changed into after Cheerios and shimmied them down her legs, and she slapped his hands away. As she kicked the jeans to the side, leaving her in just her underwear, she heard the sound of her phone ringing. Santana glanced at her bag then shrugged turning back to Puck settling on his lap and leaning in to kiss his neck. Her phone stopped ringing after a while and Santana sighed in relief. Puck laid back and tried to flip them over so that Santana was on the bottom but as usual the Latina refused to be topped and flipped them back, a sly smile on her lips. She leaned down to kiss him and just as their lips touched her phone rang in her bag again. Again she ignored it but this time as soon as it stopped ringing it started again.

"Answer the damn phone Santana," Puck groaned, shoving her off of him. Santana glared and got up, walking over to her bag and grabbing her phone. It stopped ringing just as she picked it up. She glanced at the screen _3 missed calls from Britts. _She was about to turn the phone off and put it away when it rang again in her hand. Santana sighed and hit answer.

"What Brittany?" she snapped.

"Santana!" Brittany's relieved voice sounded through the device. "Santana you have to come to my house, Quinn just dropped me off and I found her, she was on my doorstep and she's hurt and she's all white and she won't talk to me. I don't know what happened and I don't know what to do and I NEED you San! Please, please come! Please?" Brittany's voice had become frantic and pleading and it dissolved any annoyance that Santana was feeling for being interrupted.

"Britt who is hurt?" she asked, her brow wrinkling in concern as she grabbed for her jeans, trying unsuccessfully to tug them on one handed, almost falling on her ass in the process.

"Natasha!" Brittany replied and Santana sighed.

"How bad is she hurt Brittany?" she asked abandoning her attempt to get her jeans on while on the phone. She jumped when another set of hands yanked them up for her, hands wrapping around her to do up the button. She turned and glared at Puck who shrugged and gave a half smile, concern in his eyes.

"Pretty bad Santana, please just come quickly," before Santana could reply, Brittany had hung up the phone. Santana dropped it into her bag and turned to look for her shirt, finding Puck holding it out for her.

"Thanks Puck," she sighed, pulling the shirt on and beginning to do up the buttons.

"Who's hurt?" he asked, the concern evident in his voice. Santana had to give it to him. He was McKinley's biggest manwhore but he genuinely cared about the people he liked.

"Natasha Isaacs apparently," Santana told him, doing up the last button. "It's probably nothing but Britt was frantic, I can't not go," she told him, now hunting through her bag for her keys.

"S'okay," Puck told her. "Let me know if I can do anything, yeah?"

"Yeah," Santana told him over her shoulder as she walked out the door. She let herself out of the house, returning the filthy look Puck's mom shot her with a smug sneer as she did.

Glee!

At the Pierce's house Santana grabbed the key and let herself in as she always did, replacing the key before going inside.

"Britt?" she called out.

"In here," she heard the soft reply from the lounge. She walked into the room and found her best friend sitting on the couch, her back to Santana. When she circled the couch it was all she could do to contain her gasp.

"Oh my God," she murmured softly. The girl was looking in her direction but her terrified eyes were miles away and she was white as a sheet. One eye was darkening into a bruise, she was holding a blood soaked towel over her mouth, there was blood in her hair, Santana wasn't sure if it was from her mouth or from somewhere else. Her shirt had ridden up a little and Santana could see new bruising covering old bruising along her left side. The sleeve of her shirt had slipped down from the hand she was using to hold the cloth and her wrist and hand were bruised. Her jeans were torn badly and both of her knees were bloody. Santana crouched beside her, very gently reaching toward the towel.

"Honey, let me see," she ordered gently, she pulled the cloth away and winced. She had obviously been punched in the mouth; there was a nasty looking split that ran across both of her lips. Santana was busy inspecting the cut and it took her a moment to register the soft, pitiful mewling sound emitting from Natasha. She took her hands away, after gently pushing Natasha's hand with the cloth back into place, and the mewling stopped. Santana's stomach dropped when she realised that the other girl was afraid of her. "I don't think her lip will need stitches. Britt what the hell happened?" Santana asked.

"I don't know. I got home and she was crying and bleeding on the doorstep. Then she went all quiet and I rang you. What do we do?" Brittany asked.

"Is Amelia here?" Santana asked, looking around for signs of Brittany's little sister, not wanting the child to see this.

"No she's at a sleepover," Brittany replied. Santana sighed, relieved.

"Hello? Britt?" Quinn's voice sounded as the front door opened.

"I called her when you wouldn't pick up," Brittany told Santana. "In here Q."

"What's going – oh my God!" she whimpered when she saw Natasha. She dropped down next to the girl, pushing her hair off of her face. "Natasha," she said gently. Natasha's eyes briefly flew to Quinn, before resuming her unseeing stare. "Natasha," Quinn said again, a little more forcefully this time. This time when her eyes fell on Quinn they stayed there. "Natasha what happened?" she asked. Natasha's eyes filled with tears. The hand not holding the cloth slipped out from under her cheek and she reached for Quinn. Quinn took her hand in both of hers, rubbing it gently. "Come on," she whispered. "We'll clean you up and we can talk later if you want," Quinn and Brittany slowly helped Natasha to her feet and led her upstairs to the bathroom. Quinn closed the lid of the toilet and sat the injured girl on it. Brittany grabbed some clean face cloths and Natasha sat staring sadly as Quinn slowly cleaned the blood off of her face, knees and hands. She was careful of the other girl's lips, not wanting to make them bleed again. She applied some Neosporin to the scrapes on her palms and knees and a little to her lips, then she cleaned the little bit of blood out of Natasha's hair with another cloth. Quinn looked down and saw that there was blood all over Natasha's t-shirt as well.

"Brittany can you get something for Natasha to wear? Maybe some pyjamas?" Quinn suggested. Brittany complied disappearing off to her room. Quinn turned to Natasha who slowly lifted her arms up above her head. Turning her head as Quinn carefully took her t-shirt off. "Oh God," Quinn softly reached out to touch the bruises down the girl's left side. Natasha flinched away and Quinn glanced over at Santana who was perched on the edge of the bath tub. The bruises themselves weren't actually that bad but sitting over the existing bruises they looked hideous. For the first time since she had met her Quinn saw Santana looking thoroughly shaken. Quinn looked back at the bruises and noticed something else. A series of small cuts just above Natasha's left hip. She silently pointed them out to Santana who nodded to let her know that she had seen them. Brittany returned then, with a pair of pink cotton pyjama pants and a pale pink long sleeved cotton top for the girl to wear.

"I have to ring my mom," Brittany whispered to Santana who nodded.

"Damn it," Quinn cussed quietly. She was trying to get Natasha to stand so she could help her change into the pyjama pants but the girls legs were shaking so badly that she couldn't stand on her own. "Santana can you help?" Quinn asked. Santana gently moved toward the girl, eyeing her warily. She leaned down and gently hooked her elbows under Natasha's arms, lifting her to stand. She expected to get a fear reaction again but Natasha just let her head drop against Santana's chest sighing as Quinn scooted behind her and helped her change into the pyjama pants. Once that was done Santana tensed as Natasha tried to snuggle into her further, seeking comfort from the taller girl. Santana shifted to wrap her arms gently around the other girl, registering how tiny she felt in her arms. Natasha gave another big shaky sigh before lifting her head.

"Ok?" Santana asked gently.

"I just wanna sleep," Natasha whispered after a moment, they were the first words she had spoken all night and Santana felt a flood of relief at the sound of her voice.

"Ok," Santana and Quinn moved to stand on either side of her, helping her into Brittany's room. Brittany had hauled the mattress they used to use for sleepovers out from under her bed and she had pulled another one into her room from Amelia's room, pushing them together and making them up with sheets and blankets. She smiled when she saw the other three, especially when she saw how huge her pyjamas looked on the tiny Natasha.

"Natasha you can sleep in my bed with me if you like," she offered. "Or you can have the bed to yourself and we'll squish on this one."

"With you," Natasha replied immediately, looking down in embarrassment.

"Ok," Brittany led Natasha to her bed, helping her to lie down before gently tucking her in.

"We might watch a movie in here for a bit ok? It's a little early for us yet," Quinn told her, it was only 9.30pm. Natasha just nodded tiredly. The three girls changed into pyjamas themselves, Santana always kept spare pyjama's at Brittany's and Quinn borrowed a pair. They chose a movie and stretched out on their respective beds to watch it. Natasha was sound asleep within minutes.

Brittany's mom came home at around 10.30pm and immediately came into Brittany's room. Brittany took one look at her mom and burst into tears. Helen hugged her daughter tightly, peering at the sleeping girl behind her anxiously as she did.

"That's her?" she asked gently stroking Brittany's blonde hair.

"Yeah," Brittany replied, pulling away so that her mom could go to the girl. Helen crouched next to the bed looking into the bruised face.

"Did she tell you what happened?" Helen asked, gently lifting a lock of Natasha's dark hair to get a better look. Natasha whimpered a little and shifted away in her sleep. Helen pulled her hand away and Natasha immediately settled.

"No, she barely said a word," Quinn replied.

"Did you put some Neosporin on her hands and that cut on her lips?" she asked, eyeing the girl's injuries.

"Yeah and her knees, she's got scrapes on them too," Quinn replied.

"Good lord. Ok. Well I'm not going to wake her and demand she talk tonight. Let her sleep and see if you can get anything out of her in the morning ok? We'll decide what to do then. I'm going to get ready for bed. Let me know if any of you need anything ok? And try not to worry. We will sort this out," she told them gently. She walked back around the bed and kissed Brittany on the top of her head and hugged her briefly before turning and giving Santana the same treatment, like always. She turned to Quinn and cupped her face in her hands. "I wish it were under nicer circumstances but it's nice to see you around these parts again Quinn," she smiled and gave Quinn a hug and a kiss too. Quinn beamed at her. She had always loved Helen and she had missed her when she had grown apart from the other two girls. Quinn had always gotten more affection from Brittany's mom in a visit than she did from her own mother in a year. "Night girls, try to sleep well," she told them. They turned the movie back on and watched quietly for a while.

"Quinn?" Brittany asked suddenly. There was no reply. Santana rolled over and snorted at the once familiar sight. Quinn was sound asleep, splayed out on her tummy, one arm curled up behind her head, one curled up in front, her fist tucked under her chin. She had always slept like that, like a little child.

"She's asleep," Santana told Brittany.

"Oh," Brittany replied. She looked at her hands, shooting the occasional sad glance at Santana. Santana sighed. She sat up and moved to sit on Brittany's bed, in front of her best friend.

"B, I'm sorry," she whispered. "I should have listened to you. I shouldn't have brushed you off when you told me that something was wrong. I was a pretty lousy friend the last few weeks. I should have been there for you B. I'm sorry," she said it all in a rush. She hated apologising; she always came off sounding like an idiot. Brittany smiled at the apology and pulled Santana close for a hug.

"Thank you," she whispered, before she kissed her softly.

"Bed," Santana whispered, pulling away and pointing to Brittany's bed as she crawled back in next to Quinn. "What are the odds I'll wake up with Miss Snuggles here all over me?" she joked, gesturing at Quinn.

"Pretty high I'd say," Brittany giggled as the two of them resurrected their old sleepover routine.

"Night B," Santana smiled.

"Night San," Brittany replied, laying down and switching off the light.

Glee!

Brittany woke at 2am, feeling watched. She rolled over and saw Natasha sitting up in the dark, staring at her.

"Are you ok?" Brittany asked her.

"I'm thirsty," Natasha told her.

"'I'll get you some water," Brittany replied. She got up and carefully walked around Quinn and Santana's bed, stifling a giggle when she saw Santana asleep on the very edge of the bed with Quinn snuggled up so close she was practically on top of her. She opened the door and jumped when she realised that Natasha was right behind her. She reached back and took the smaller girls hand, leading her to the kitchen. She sat her at the table while she filled two glasses with water, then she sat beside her as they drank. "Natasha?" Brittany asked.

"Yeah?" Natasha replied hesitantly.

"What happened?" Brittany asked.

"My brother had a party. I got in a fight with one of his friends," Natasha replied quietly. It was a blatant lie and they both knew it.

"Ok," Brittany replied. "You can tell me what really happened whenever you're ready." Natasha blinked owlishly at Brittany's statement, stunned that the girl had actually acknowledged the lie out loud and had given her an out, if only a temporary one. She sipped her water in silence. Once they were done Brittany put their glasses in the dishwasher and took her friend's hand, leading her back to bed. Natasha fell asleep quickly again but Brittany wasn't so lucky.

Glee!

"Morning girls," Helen greeted as the four girls traipsed downstairs in their pyjamas at 9am. She looked at Natasha quizzically. "Hi, I'm Helen, Britt's mom," she introduced, holding out her hand.

"I'm Tasha Isaacs," Natasha replied, hesitantly shaking Helen's hand. Brittany glanced at her when she heard the shortened name. Natasha shrugged.

"Nice to meet you Tasha," Helen smiled. "Pancakes for breakfast girls?" she asked.

"You don't have to do that Helen," Santana grinned, she always argued even though Helen always did it anyway.

"I want to. Now sit down," Helen ordered, pre-empting Santana's usual offer of help. The girls sat chatting while Helen made pancakes and served them, Santana had refused to take no for an answer and had cut up some fruit to eat with them. Natasha sat silently, watching. She had nibbled slowly on a pancake and a couple of slices of apple before pushing her plate away.

"Britt I should go home," she said softly. "Can…um…Can I borrow some clothes?" she asked.

"Sure," Brittany loaded their plates into the dishwasher before she headed upstairs, Santana and Quinn not far behind. Brittany pulled a selection of clothes that she hoped might come close to fitting the much smaller girl and Natasha picked a skirt and a shirt.

"I'll wash them and give them to you on Monday," Natasha told her.

"Tasha," Quinn began, using the nickname from earlier. "Are you going to be ok?" she asked pointedly. Natasha nodded, not making eye contact. She quickly changed into the clothes Brittany had lent her and put her shoes on. She grabbed the plastic bag Brittany had put her clothes into the previous night and looked at the ground, facing the three girls.

"Tasha you know where we are, if you need anything-" Santana began. Natasha cut her off.

"Thank-you. I have to go. My mom's going to kill me," Natasha bolted; they heard her thank Helen for breakfast on her way out. Helen was in the room a minute later.

"Did she tell you anything?" she asked. Santana and Quinn shook their heads.

"She woke in the night and told me her brother threw a party and she got in a fight with one of his friends," Brittany told her. "It was a lie. I told her I'm here when she's ready to tell the truth."

"Shit," Helen swore. "I guess that's all you can do. I'm going to call child services though. I want them aware that something is going on. If you see any new injuries on that girl I want you to tell me and I will call the cops. Understood?" she asked firmly, looking at each girl in turn.

"Yes," they replied in unison. Helen left them then to go back downstairs. The tension in Brittany's bedroom was palpable. None of them could deny the seriousness of what had happened last night and it scared them all. They couldn't write it off as drunken fighting any longer even if Natasha tried to play it that way. They were in deep now and as they looked at each other that morning they just hoped that whatever was going on in Natasha's life, they could save her from it before it was too late.

Glee!

Holy crap this chapter ended up going on forever! Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed it.


	8. Chapter 07

Appearances

**A/N:**Natasha is in denial, Quinn, Santana and Brittany are overprotective and an unsuspecting English class learns something interesting about Natasha…

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Glee or the song Fallen by Sarah McLachlan…

Glee!

Chapter Six:

_Heaven bent to take my hand  
And lead me through the fire  
Be the long awaited answer  
To a long and painful fight_

_Truth be told I've tried my best_  
_But somewhere along the way_  
_I got caught up in all there was to offer_  
_And the cost was so much more than I could bear_

_Though I've tried, I've fallen_  
_I have sunk so low_  
_I've messed up better_  
_I should know_  
_So don't come 'round here_  
_And tell me I told you so_

_We all begin with good intent_  
_Love was raw and young_  
_We believed that we could change ourselves_  
_The past can be undone_

_But we carry on our backs the burden time always reveals_  
_In the lonely light of morning_  
_In the wound that would not heal_  
_It's the bitter taste of losing everything, I've held so dear_

_I've fallen_  
_I have sunk so low_  
_I've messed up better_  
_I should know_  
_So don't come 'round here_  
_And tell me I told you so_

_Heaven bent to take my hand_  
_I have nowhere left to turn_  
_I've lost to those I thought were friends_  
_To everyone I know_

_Oh, they turned their heads embarrassed_  
_Pretend that they don't see_  
_But it's one missed step, you'll slip before you know it_  
_And there doesn't seem a way to be redeemed_

_Though I've tried, I've fallen_  
_I have sunk so low_  
_I've messed up better_  
_I should know_  
_So don't come 'round here_  
_And tell me I told you so, no_

_I've messed up better_  
_I should know_  
_But don't come 'round here_  
_And tell me I told you so_

Rachel and Natasha finished their song to distracted, half-hearted applause from the Glee Club on Monday. They were all looking at Natasha with her black eye and split lip and whispering to each other, wondering what had happened. Natasha rolled her eyes at the blatant staring.

"You should see the other guy," she smirked at them, forcing her old smug pride to ooze form every pore. "He managed to get a couple of lucky shots in before I kicked his ass." She struggled to keep the façade from slipping when she caught sight of Quinn, Santana and Brittany's concerned faces, her usual slightly elevated anxiety ratcheted up to an almost critical level and she had to fight with everything she had to keep it under her control. She was sure that the three girls would tell the others, she knew Brittany would have told Quinn and Santana about their talk in the kitchen and she was terrified that not just one, but three (possibly four if Brittany had told her Mom) people knew that someone was hurting her. It relieved her that that was all they knew though.

"Great performance ladies," Mr Schue made his way to the front, clapping his hands. "Who's up next?" he asked as the pair made their way back to their respective seats. Santana raised her hand, heading to the front with Mike. Brittany shifted forward a row to sit beside Natasha, grabbing her hand and cradling it delicately in both of hers in her lap. Natasha tensed but didn't pull her hand away, choosing instead to watch Santana and Mike's performance of Pink's 'Leave Me Alone (I'm Lonely)'. Santana sang and danced while Mike just danced with and around her as he usually did. When they finished it was to raucous applause and some enthusiastic whooping from Natasha and Puck.

"Wow that was great guys!" Mr Schue grinned. He was secretly thrilled that Santana had actually chosen to exchange the F-words in the song for less offensive ones. He wasn't going to tell Santana that though, if she knew he approved then she would probably pick the dirtiest, most swear word filled song she could think of for next time. He internally cringed at the thought of what that song might be.

Santana grinned at Mike and slapped him a high five as they went back to their seats, to her surprise she had actually really enjoyed working with the guy; he was easy going and eager and had taught her some kick ass moves. He was really fun to hang around with, making her laugh by doing impressions of teachers and other Glee Club members.

"Face it Tasha, me and Chang wiped the floor with you and Berry," she whispered in Natasha's ear as she passed her on her way to her seat. Natasha scoffed loudly.

"In your dreams Santana," she threw back at the girl. Santana winked as Quinn and Mercedes got up to perform their number.

Glee!

Natasha sighed as she was walking to her English class. Santana was walking about 10 feet behind her once again. She felt like the three girls were stalking her or something. She couldn't go anywhere in the school without one of them trailing her. Hell she couldn't even pee without one of them following her into the bathroom with the excuse of checking her makeup. It was driving her bat-shit. She knew they were doing it because they cared about her but being followed all of the time was nothing short of infuriating. She walked into the classroom and sat down, glancing at the door just in time to see Santana send a pointed look at Quinn who promptly moved to sit next to Natasha.

"Hey Tasha," she greeted brightly.

"Hi Quinn," Natasha sighed.

"You ok?" Quinn asked quickly, her voice low.

"I'm fine Quinn," Natasha said patiently, trying not to snap at the well meaning girl.

"You don't seem fine. You seem upset," Quinn pointed out. Natasha took a deep calming breath.

"Quinn I am fine. I'm just getting really tired of the three way stalking act you lot have got going on right now. I feel like I'm on suicide watch or something. I'm fine Quinn. I got in a fight, I got my ass handed to me and I got scared. It's over, it's done. I am fine," Natasha told her, trying to keep her quick temper in check. She caught sight of Rachel watching them and glared at her. "Stop eavesdropping Rachel!" she snapped. Quinn whipped around and glared at her as well.

"Turn around Manhands-," Quinn was interrupted before she could finish.

"Don't call her that. It's so degrading," Natasha snarled furiously. Quinn's eyebrows were at her hairline.

"Excuse me?" she asked snidely, her own temper flaring.

"I said: Don't call her that, it's so degrading," Natasha repeated, slowly and evenly.

"Wow. What you want to sleep with it now? You know there are rumours all over McKinley about your _orientation_" Quinn's anger sent her into full bitch mode.

"Yeah I'm a lesbian," Natasha replied with a shrug. "But no, I don't have any inclination to sleep with Rachel. What you said to her was uncalled for." Natasha almost laughed at the look on Quinn's face at her confession of being gay.

"I…uh…I…" she stammered, trying to find something, anything to say to that.

"So you are a dyke," said a voice from behind them.

"And proud of it, Karofsky, so if you even think about slushying me for it, then I will cut off your balls and feed them to you for breakfast. Ya clear?" Natasha said whipping around to face the footballer, her eyes met his, hers dark with fury. She knew about the bullying he had subjected Kurt Hummel to and she refused to be reduced to having to change schools because of this stupid, homophobic oaf of a boy. He stared into her angry eyes for a moment before nodding and dropping his head to look at the book in front of him. Natasha turned back to Quinn who still looked stunned. She glanced over at Rachel who smiled.

"Good for you," Rachel said, approvingly. "You should be proud of who you are." The teacher chose that moment to call them to attention and start the class.

No one spoke until the bell rang at the end of the class. Natasha was packing up her stuff when, out of the corner of her eye, she saw Quinn get up and block Rachel's exit from the room. She stood up, ready to intervene if necessary. She was stunned at what came out of Quinn's mouth next.

"I'm sorry _Rachel_," she emphasised the girl's given name. "Tash is right. Calling you 'Manhands' was uncalled for."

"Its fine Quinn," Rachel said softly, disbelief in her eyes as she moved to walk past the blonde girl.

"No it isn't. Truth is, you were good to me last year…through all of the crap. You had absolutely no reason to be, in fact you had every reason to do the complete opposite," Quinn cringed. "But you didn't. You still annoy the hell out of me and I still want to punch you almost every time you open your mouth, but the least I can do is stop calling you names. Later, Berry," Quinn turned and walked back to her desk, leaving a bewildered Rachel standing rooted to the spot. She visibly shook herself a little before glancing at Natasha and Quinn and leaving. "You're really gay?" Quinn asked. Not making eye contact.

"You don't have to worry Quinn, you're gorgeous but I'm not planning to jump you," Natasha replied, sarcasm lacing her voice. She had dealt with way too many straight girls who thought that since she was a lesbian that automatically meant that she wanted to sleep with them, it had actually cost her friends at her old school. She threw her bag over her shoulder and stalked off before Quinn could answer.

"I didn't mean it like that," Quinn spoke aloud to the empty room, feeling a little hurt.

Glee!

Brittany waited until Natasha was quite a way down the road before following her. She kept close to anything that she could hide behind in case Natasha turned around. She followed her for nearly 20 minutes before Natasha arrived at a house and walked up to the front door. She stood on the doorstep for a long time, staring at the door. It was like she didn't want to go inside. Brittany watched from a distance as she finally pulled out a key from her pocket, unlocked the door and disappeared inside. After a few minutes Brittany turned and walked back to her own house. Her Mom part-owned and worked at a bakery, and she worked the 5am to 2pm shift on Mondays and Fridays to spend more time with her girls, so Brittany knew that she would be at home with Amelia today. She was still relieved to see her car in her driveway. She really needed her Mom today.

"Britt!" Amelia shrieked when she saw her big sister. "Want to watch SpongeBob with me? Please? Is Santana coming today?" the 8 year old asked.

"Not today Amelia. I'll come watch SpongeBob soon ok? I have to talk to Mom first," Brittany told her sister gently.

"Ok," Amelia bounded off to the living room while Brittany went to find her Mom. Helen was out in the back yard, weeding her rose garden and humming softly to herself.

"Mom?" Brittany called out, her voice shaking already.

"Hey honey," Helen said with a smile. "Oh Britt, what's wrong?" she asked when her eldest daughter burst into tears and threw herself into her arms. Brittany just sobbed helplessly, unable to find the words to tell her Mom what was upsetting her. Helen pulled her over to the nearby picnic table and pulled her into her lap, letting her cry herself out. When she finally settled she opened her mouth to speak but her Mom got there first. "I called Child Services on Saturday about Tasha. I stupidly told them she said it was a fight but that we didn't believe her and so they said they would check it out, but since she is saying it was a fight and we have no real proof otherwise, that she will be low priority," Helen sighed angrily. "But at least they're aware of it now I guess. If anything else happens they can look back and say that they have had other suspicious injuries reported to them," Helen explained, stroking Brittany's hair.

"I'm scared for her. And I know that she's scared. I can see it in her eyes," Brittany whispered.

"I know sweetheart," it broke Helen's heart to see her daughter so scared and upset, she kissed her forehead. "I'm scared for her too." She held and rocked Brittany for a while longer before she took her inside and set to making Brittany's favourite for dinner to try to cheer her up a little.

Later that night Helen walked softly into Brittany's room, as her daughter slept, smiling when she noticed the head of the stuffed duck that Santana had given her poking out from under the covers. She sat on the edge of the bed and watched her sleep for a little bit, her face finally peaceful, blonde hair splayed out around her like a halo. Helen sent up a silent prayer to whoever was listening, that they could help Natasha in time. She didn't even want to think of what would happen to Brittany if they couldn't. She sighed softly and stood up, leaning over to stroke a few stray hairs away from Brittany's face before kissing her forehead and quietly walking out of the room again.

Glee!

Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoy. This chapter is something of a shortish filler to get a few things out there in prep for the next chapter which I am part way through already and am hoping to have up tomorrow night for you all. Thanks to all who have reviewed and favourite and alerted. I'm so pleased that people are enjoying this!

Oh and I should say that I don't know how the child welfare services work in America. I just wrote what I know would most likely – unfortunately – happen here. With a teenager who is denying abuse and giving feasible excuses they wouldn't generally act straight away unless the reports start building up or something big happens. Sucks and they'll never admit to it but that's the way it works.


	9. Chapter 08

Appearances

**A/N: **The Cheerios and Glee are prepping for Regionalsand the Football team are coming up to their Championship Game…**Spoilers for 2x11 The Sue Sylvester Shuffle. **

**Resubmitted with the some typos and errors fixed up. That will teach me not to just scan read in my haste to post!

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Glee…

Glee!

Chapter Eight:

Two weeks had gone by since Natasha had turned up injured on the Pierce's doorstep and since then things had been quiet. Brittany, Quinn and, begrudgingly, Santana had been keeping an eye on her nearly constantly at school. Brittany was basically stalking the girl home every night, making sure that she got there and she would wait anxiously for her every morning. Brittany's mom hadn't heard anything further from Child Services on the matter, not that she had thought that she would, even if they did plan on getting off their collective ass and doing something. But now Cheerleading Regionals were coming up fast and Sue Sylvester was working them like a slave driver. They had won their sectionals and were beginning to prepare for Regionals for Glee as well and as such their vigilant watch began to falter. Natasha seemed perfectly happy though and she had settled down…Aside from a near fist fight with Karofsky the week before when he had called her a dyke in the hallway…

On Friday afternoon the three girls walked to Cheerios practice together to practice Sue's latest seriously over the top, spectacle of a routine. The pyrotechnics were truly obscene in most of the Squad's opinions, especially the flaming boobs at the end, which Santana was convinced were Sue's version of an insult to her surgically enhanced chest. They got to the auditorium just before four, wondering where Natasha had gotten to.

"Who's the kid?" Santana whispered when they walked into the auditorium. The other two shrugged, as baffled as she was. Santana stared at the kid in question, a small girl with tan skin, dark hair and green eyes who was standing next to Sue and struggling to hold the Coach's clipboard and bullhorn at the same time.

"Coach Sylvester my sister isn't your packhorse!" Natasha's irritated voice sounded to their left.

"She wants to be here then she helps out," Sue replied, crossing her arms. "You watch the cheek Isaacs," she added with a glare.

"Ugh, come here Jem," Natasha took the clipboard and bull horn, handing them to Becky Jackson and led the little girl away.

"Tasha has a sister!" Brittany squealed excitedly. She bounced over to where Natasha had settled the girl in an out of the way corner with some crayons and paper, dragging Santana and Quinn with her. Now that it had been pointed out Quinn wondered how she hadn't seen it the moment she walked in the door. The kid was like a mini Tasha. "Hi!" Brittany was practically bubbling over with excitement.

"Hey, B," Natasha smiled at the girls childlike excitement.

"Is this your sister?" Brittany asked.

"Oh yeah, this is Jemimah. Jem this is Brittany, I think you go to school with her sister, Amelia Pierce?" Natasha said to the child. She looked up, scanning Brittany with piercing green eyes.

"Yep. Nice to meet you," she gave a half smile before her eyes shifted to the other two girls.

"This is Quinn and that's Santana," Natasha told the child.

"Nice to meet you," the child repeated. Her eyes held a great deal of caution in them and it unsettled Quinn and Santana a little.

"Jem, we gotta go practice now ok?" Natasha told her. "You gotta stay here, I don't want you getting trampled…or burned by any of the pyrotechnic shit in this routine," She instructed.

"Ok. I won't move. But you have to put a dollar in the swear jar when we get home!" Jemimah crowed.

"Nuh uh! Its fifty cents for 'Shit'," Natasha argued.

"Well it's a dollar now!" Jemimah cackled victoriously.

"Ok, just stay here, ok Miss Swear Police?" Natasha turned and walked away before the price got any higher.

Glee!

They finished up the ridiculously over-the-top routine – complete with excessive stunts and pyrotechnics – and the squad ended up standing in front of Sue. She glared at them all briefly before lifting her bullhorn.

"I'M BORED," she growled through the thing, making several of the girls flinch. She lowered the bullhorn, to sighs of relief before beginning her rant. "Ladies I am at a loss. Brittany please remind me of how I singlehandedly put cheerleading on the map," she instructed.

"In 1979 you directed a made-for-TV movie about the Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders, called… 'The Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders'," Brittany replied carefully.

"That is correct. In the meantime, what's changed?" Sue asked.

"Personal grooming habits?" Quinn replied, a hint of sarcasm seeping into her voice.

"What's changed is, I have completely lost interest. And ladies, I blame you. Becky! More silicon falsies!" Sue ordered.

"Got it Coach!" Becky replied, grabbing the bucket of falsies and beginning to hand them out. Natasha caught Santana's eye and the Latina gave her her signature eye-roll.

"You will each enhance your bust with an additional pair of chicken cutlets in an attempt to add some jiggle to what is _the _most boring routine I have ever witnessed," Sue told them. Annoyance flashed in Quinn's eyes.

"But Coach Sylvester! This is the most elaborate routine the Cheerios have ever done! We're shoe-ins at Regionals next week and we're the favourite to win at Nationals!" she defended her squad.

"And yet I am still SO VERY BORED!" Sue yelled the last three words through the bullhorn. "Even things I used to think were hilarious. Case in point: Sandbags!" Santana looked up, annoyed by the insulting nickname. "Slap yourself with a chicken cutlet," Sue ordered. Santana rolled her eyes and complied. "Now slap Brittany," Sue told her. Santana did, none too gently, making Brittany wince slightly. "See? Not even a chuckle," Sue shook her head.

"The problem is you keep trying to make a bigger and bigger spectacle," Quinn told her. "No matter how hard we try, we can't make a routine work unless you find a way to make it interesting for you. You have to find a way to top yourself."

"Q, you just may have a point. But to be sure…slap yourself with a chicken cutlet," Sue ordered, cocking her head to watch.

Glee!

"Well that was more humiliating than usual," Quinn observed as they went to grab their bags before heading to get changed.

"That woman is bat-," Natasha paused, glancing at Jemimah who was listening to them. "-nuts. I'm kind of afraid of what she's going to come up with next."

"Welcome to the Cheerios," Santana scoffed, rolling her eyes again. Quinn and Brittany giggled and Natasha shook her head, a grin breaking out at the last moment.

"Come on Jem," Natasha held out a hand to her sister. "We're heading for the showers babe."

"Ok, but Tash?" Jemimah asked.

"Yeah?" Natasha replied.

"Can I hold Santana's hand?" Jemimah asked. Her cheeks taking on an adorable pink flush of embarrassment. Natasha looked at Santana who looked totally bewildered at the request.

"You'll have to ask her," Natasha was clearly enjoying Santana's discomfort.

"Santana can I hold your hand to the showers?" the little girl asked obediently.

"Uh, yeah, I guess," Santana found that she couldn't say no to that cute bashful little face. She hesitantly shifted her bag to free up a hand and held it out to the child, who slipped a small hand into it, smiling at the older girl. As they headed toward the locker room Santana couldn't help but ask; "How come you want to hold my hand?"

"Because you're pretty," Jemimah told her, like it was the most obvious thing in the whole world.

"Uh, thanks," Santana replied, a tiny, genuine smile touching her lips for the briefest second as they walked out of the gymnasium.

Glee!

Natasha had bolted through the shower and then packed up hers and Jemimah's gear and headed home, leaving the other three to take their time. As they headed out of the gym a voice stopped them.

"Airbags, Q, Brittany, I'd like to see you in my office. Now," Sue Sylvester ordered. She stalked off leaving her top three Cheerios jogging to keep up with her. Once they reached the woman's trophy adorned office she gestured for them to have a seat. She took a seat opposite them which immediately set all three girls on edge. Usually when she called them into her office like this she would lift small weights, or work out on her elliptical while she ranted nonsensically about Glee Club, Will Schuester, Glee Club _and_ Will Schuester, homeless people or immigrants and her latest cunning plan to deal with the current subject of her distaste. For her to sit down formally was not normal. As usual the tall woman sensed their unease. "I called you in here today to have a very serious conversation with you," she started.

"About what?" Quinn asked. She always spoke for the other two at first.

"About your new friend, Natasha Isaacs," Sue told them.

"What about Natasha?" Quinn asked, her unease could be heard in her voice now.

"Since she joined my squad I have noticed on a couple of occasions that she's been temporarily off form, one time I distinctly saw her guarding her rib cage with her arm during routines. At first, with all the fighting she did here, I thought maybe she was picking fights with other people outside of the school, maybe even using it as some twisted form of punishment for herself for her…_indiscretions…_at her old school. I'm assuming that you three are aware of said _indiscretions_?" Sue searched their faces.

"We are," Quinn replied. Obviously they had Google searched the girl the day she started on the Cheerios, looking for dirt. And they had found the gold mine. But even Santana, who prided herself on being the cruellest and most relentless bully of the three, hadn't had the heart to use what they had found out against the girl.

"So I let the injuries slide. Then today I saw something that, if I had one, would have made my heart sink," Sue told them, leaning closer. "The little girl had a handprint bruise on one shoulder," Santana swallowed audibly, Quinn's jaw tightened and Brittany gasped. "I need to know if you three know anything about any of this, anything at all. If there is abuse going on in that family I need to know about it." Sue was searching their faces and she knew that they knew something. It was in their eyes. Suddenly Brittany burst into tears and threw herself into Santana's lap, hugging her best friend and sobbing into the front of her uniform.

"Two weeks ago Tasha turned up on Britt's doorstep," Santana began softly. "She had a black eye, split lips, grazed palms and knees and bruised ribs. We cleaned her up, took care of her. She told Britt her brother threw a party and that she got in a scrap with one of his friends. We don't believe her. She was petrified when she turned up. Then when she settled down she was just straight-up evasive…and a week before that Dave Karofsky shoved her into her locker and Britt saw she had badly bruised ribs then too." Santana got it all out in a rush. She looked up at Sue when she was done. The familiar, slightly demented look that usually graced the woman's features was gone, replaced by deep concern.

"Did you tell anyone else about this?" she asked. "A teacher? One of your parents?"

"Yeah we told Helen Pierce. Brittany's mom," Quinn replied.

"She called Child Services," Brittany lifted her face from its position in the crook of Santana's neck. "They said they have practically no proof so she's a low priority."

"Typical," Sue muttered. "Listen to me, I want you three to promise me something right here and now; if you see any- and I mean _any_- more injuries on either of those girls I want you to come to me or Mrs Pierce. Straight away if possible, if you can't find either of us go to that ginger lemur Ms. Pillsbury or dare I say it Will Schuester. Promise me this!" Sue told them firmly.

"I promise," they spoke in unison.

"If you go to someone else first I still want to hear about this. The more people Child Welfare is hearing this from the better," Sue told them. "Now get out of my office."

The three girls stood to leave and as they walked out of the door they heard the characteristic parting insult behind them.

"And Chesticles? Make sure you don't stand too close to any of the fire during that routine. I don't want your chest fruit to melt in front of the judges at Regionals and distract them from our brilliant performance!"

Glee!

Quinn, Brittany and Santana actually felt better knowing that Sue Sylvester was aware of Natasha's situation. They all knew she would be invaluable if anything went down. It lifted the weight on their shoulders a little. They were discussing it quietly in Glee on Monday as they waited for Mr Schue to arrive. Everyone else was goofing around. Natasha was chatting with Rachel Berry, Tina and Mike were dancing and Puck, Finn and Sam were also deep in conversation, about something dirty judging by Puck's facial expressions. The three cheerleaders weren't paying a lot of attention to what was going on around them until Tina spoke.

"Oh my God! Artie!" she said, shocked. The boy had wheeled himself into the choir room, dripping cherry slushy behind him. Brittany jumped up and headed toward her boyfriend immediately. Santana scowled.

"It was awful!" Artie shuddered. Brittany touched him briefly then went to her bag to get the towels she kept in there.

"That's it! Screw rehearsal! This ends here and now!" Finn jumped up, along with Puck and Sam and headed for the door.

"We're going to go all…thunderdome on those guys!" Puck growled.

"So this is what the ladies lounge looks like on the inside," Came a familiar voice. The football team were walking into the choir room.

"This is the choir room, now put your fists up 'cause you and I are going to do some dancing," Sam spat, getting up in their faces.

"I got this Sam," Puck told him, pushing his sleeves up.

"Coach Beiste told us to come. Where is she?" Karofsky asked.

"Everyone have a seat," the football Coach's voice sounded behind them as she and Mr Schuester walked into the room.

"You too guys," Mr Schue told the Glee Club. "Alright, New Directions let's give a warm welcome to the newest members of the Glee Club," he told them. A chorus of protest erupted from both the Glee kids and the Football team. Mercedes "Hell to the no Mr Schue!" ringing out over the others.

"Mr Schue are you serious? These are the guys who made Kurt transfer!" Finn protested.

"There is no way I am sharing the choir room with a known homophobe!" Rachel told Schue forcefully.

"I don't disagree with you guys," Mr Schue told them. "But I talked to Coach Beiste about it and she and I both agree that the kind of bullying David does is born out of ignorance. Having him in here, as difficult as it may be for us, is an opportunity to show him and the rest of the guys that being in Glee Club is kinda cool, and to find some common ground."

"All of you are going to be in this Glee Club for one week. No exceptions," Beiste told her boys.

"She's bluffing! Next week is the championship game. Without us she has no team," Karofsky told the others.

"With you I have no team!" Beiste growled angrily. "You guys need to find a way to come together or we're going to get our asses kicked from here 'til Tuesday finds a saddlebag full of buckwheat!" Several people looked around in utter confusion at the last part.

"If I have to stay I ain't singin' no show tunes! That's the music of my oppressors," Azimio stated.

"Do you even have any idea what we do in here?" Finn asked incredulously.

"No," Mr Schuester answered. "None of them do. We have to show them. Rachel, Puck? Haven't you guys been working on something? Why don't you give it a whirl?" he told them.

"Fine. As offended as I am by their presence here, I won't let anything get in the way of a performance," Rachel said haughtily as she got up and she and Puck headed to the front of the room. The glee club exchanged incredulous looks, barely able to believe their current situation. Glee was meant to be a safe place and here Schue had crushed that by bringing in the guys who bullied most of the club relentlessly.

Rachel and Puck gave a performance of Lady Antebellum's 'Need You Now.' Which didn't go down all that well with the football team. It went down so badly in fact that Coach Beiste had to literally haul Puck away from Azimio, whom he was hell bent on braining with his guitar, while Schue tried to block Azimio from getting to Puck and Sam had had to grab Rachel and lift her feet off of the ground as she struggled, kicked out and hurled abuse at everyone on the football team.

"Great first day right?" Schue shouted sarcastically to Beiste in the midst of the brawl.

Glee!

"Hey dyke!" Natasha turned around from her locker, her short fuse well and truly burnt out just by those two words. She was met with an ice cold blueberry slushie to the face. She wiped the god awful stuff out of her eyes, catching sight of Karofsky and Azimio laughing down the hallway. She saw Santana start to go after them but Natasha launched herself down the hallway, barking an order for Santana to back off as she passed her. The angry brunette caught up to the two football players. She slammed into Karofsky, knowing him off balance and into an empty classroom. Azimio opened his mouth to speak but Natasha, still dripping slushy, wasn't letting that happen.

"Fuck off Azimio or so help me God I will CASTRATE YOU!" she screamed. The dark skinned boy, despite being about three times Natasha's size backed down and walked away. Natasha stalked into the classroom where Karofsky still stood, shit eating grin plastered on his face, slamming the door behind her.

"What are you going to do? Fight me?" he taunted. "I'm three times your size Isaacs!"

"You think you are so fucking funny don't you Karofsky? You think you deflect attention from yourself by targeting openly or suspected gay kids at this school, but you know what? You are see-through! Like fucking cellophane," Natasha snarled viciously. "You have the worst, most obvious case of gay panic I have ever seen!"

"I'm not a fucking homo!" Karofsky snarled, stepping forward to get right up in Natasha's face. She didn't back down, in fact she took a small step forward, so that they were toe to toe.

"I know what it's like, to struggle with your sexuality in small town Ohio," her voice was still angry but calmer now. "To know that you're different and to be constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop, for everyone to suddenly realise what you are. You made a move on Kurt Hummel right? That's why you up the ante to the point where you went from bullying him to all out terrorizing and threatening to kill him? It made the paranoia so much worse didn't it? You suddenly felt like you were walking around with a fucking neon sign that said 'I'm Gay' in capital letters. You feel like you have to hide who you are from everyone that you know. You start to police everything that comes out of your mouth, every move that you make is calculated, to make sure no one sees. I understand that David," Natasha's voice had softened now.

"I'm not-," Karofsky started to snarl again but Natasha cut him off.

"Let me finish," she told him. "I fell for someone. I fell for her and then when she wanted me to come out, I wouldn't. I couldn't. I couldn't be 'that dyke' on the cheerleading squad. She hated me for that. She hated me for refusing to acknowledge and admit to what I am, to _who_ I am. So she decided that if I wouldn't out myself, that she would do it for me. It was awful, I had hidden myself so carefully for so long and now everyone knew. The guys all decided that that meant I wanted to have a three way with them and their girlfriends. My friends stopped speaking to me because if I was a lesbian then I must want to fuck them, right? Others just made nasty snide remarks, spread awful rumours. Even the teachers were in on it. My very elderly, very devoutly Christian math teacher kicked me out of his class because he was afraid teaching a gay girl would reflect poorly on him in the eyes of God. My parents were furious with me. They told me that this was a stupid phase and that I'd better hurry up and grow out of it. No-one understood me. As far as anyone was concerned I was at the bottom of the food chain. I was an outcast. If it hadn't been for other shit that went down straight after that then I'm pretty sure my cheerleading coach would have dropped me from the squad," Natasha took a deep breath, realising she was venting and not getting to the point. "Jesus, me getting outed and the consequences are beside the point though. What I am trying to get across here is that I know how much it sucks to have to hide such a huge part of who you are because you're afraid of the consequences. I know that you are nowhere close to ready to admit to anything right now. Hell you're probably still trying desperately to come to terms with it in your own head. But even though you slushied me today, simply for being who I am, I want you to know that if you want someone to talk to, someone that you don't have to hide your true self from. Come and see me," She finished.

"I'm not a fucking homo," Karofsky hissed. But Natasha could see in his eyes that her words had affected him.

"Fine. You get forgiven for this one," Natasha gestured to her wet, stained Cheerios uniform. "But do it again? I will break your fucking jaw." Natasha turned and walked to the door, leaving a stunned and angry Karofsky standing alone. "Oh and I would watch out for Coach Sylvester if I were you. She is not going to like that you wrecked my uniform. And that woman is more batshit crazy than I'll ever be." Natasha stalked out of the classroom and back to where Quinn, Santana and Brittany were waiting with her Cheerios bag and some towels.

"Tash? Did you murder Karofsky?" Brittany asked fretfully.

"Not today B," Natasha replied, rubbing the taller girl's arm and sending her a sweet smile.

Glee!

Wow ok I know I promised this a couple days ago but it ended up being a lot harder to write than I had expected! I hope the length makes up for the extra wait. It is Easter in New Zealand this weekend so I get four days off and hope to get some more written within that time. I won't promise a certain amount so that you lovely readers aren't let down if I fail to deliver…again. Thanks again to all who review, follow and fave. Makes my day!

I'd like to say thanks to SmilingManiacs for all of the lovely reviews that you have given me. Would like to have done it personally but you review anonymously so I will have to settle for doing it here instead. I'm so glad you are enjoying the story so much and I hope I didn't disappoint with this chapter!


	10. Chapter 09

Appearances

**A/N: **Brittany doesn't want to die in a human canon accident, the footballers don't want to be in Glee and Sue Sylvester gets hers…**Spoilers for 2x11 The Sue Sylvester Shuffle and 2x12 Silly Love Songs. **This is a looooong one peoples. Oh and Quinn and Finn never get "mono" in my world, because it was slightly ridiculous. That virus takes like 4-7 weeks after you get it to become symptomatic. So I'm conveniently ignoring that storyline. For the purposes of this story, Santana simply planted the idea that Quinn and Finn were cheating on Sam in his head and he's now very paranoid...

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Glee…

Glee!

Chapter Nine:

Natasha, Santana, Quinn and Brittany stood in the bathroom quietly cleaning off the awesome Zombie make up that they had put on during Glee. Mr Schue had decided that they were going to do a zombie theme for the half time show at the championship game. They were doing a mash up of Michael Jackson's 'Thriller' and the Yeah, Yeah, Yeah's 'Heads Will Roll'. It was bittersweet for the cheerleaders though as Mr Schue had told Figgins about Sue's insane plan to shoot Brittany out of a human canon at Cheerleading Regionals and Sue had retaliated by having Regional's shifted to the same weekend as the championship game. If they didn't go to Regional's they were out of the Cheerios and if they didn't go to the game they were out of Glee.

"Zombie camp was funner than I expected," Brittany suddenly spoke. "And the Glee Club together with the football team? It's like a double rainbow…A Zombie double rainbow!" she said excitedly.

"What the hell are we going to do?" Quinn asked. "If we go to our Cheerleading competition then we miss the half time show and we're out of the Glee Club. I'm torn."

"I'm not," Santana replied. Natasha glared at her.

"I'm Brittany," Brittany replied, confusion painting her features. Natasha smiled patted her arm gently.

"Couldn't help but overhear your conversation," Sue Sylvester's voice rang out behind them.

"What were you doing in there?" Quinn asked indignantly, annoyed by the woman's blatant spying.

"Enjoying the eavesdropping afforded me by the Swiss timepiece regularity and utter silence of my 2pm…ninja poops," Sue replied. The four girls grimaced. "Well I typed these up for you ladies, requiring your signature, tendering your resignation from the Glee Club," She handed the forms to Quinn. "Oh and Brittany, here's a note for you, handwritten and in crayon, from the human canon saying how much it misses you," she handed another sheet of paper to Brittany who looked a little guilty. Natasha caught Santana's eye and both saw the other's fury at the way Coach Sylvester was taking advantage of Brittany's simplicity to manipulate her into doing a stunt that was probably going to get her killed.

"Coach that canon is going to get Brittany killed! Is that really worth it to win a stupid National Championship?" Quinn was the one who pulled the woman up on it.

"SEVENTH CONSECUTIVE _stupid National Championship_," Sue retorted mockingly.

"This is ridiculous," Quinn snapped.

"You had quite a year last year Q," Sue said calmly. "As I recall you didn't have such a good time out of that Cheerios uniform," they watched as Quinn's face took on a guarded look at the reminder of the previous year. Sue smirked at the reaction. "Ladies I am giving you the chance right now to choose once and for all where your true loyalties lie. Choose the Cheerios…or choose the GLEE CLUB!" she growled the last part in a mock horror voice, before stalking out of the bathroom.

Glee!

"Ew. She didn't wash her hands," Brittany commented, apparently oblivious to the gravity of their current situation. Quinn was reading the forms in her hands which were partly a resignation letter and party a series of insults aimed at Will Schuester and the Glee Club. The top form was Natasha's and Quinn frowned when she saw the girl's full given name at the bottom. Natasha Róisín Isaacs.

"Natasha _how_ on earth do you say your middle name?" she asked staring at it.

"Ro-sheen," Natasha sounded it out. "Irish," she said by way of explanation. "What's yours?"

"Celeste," Quinn replied. "How did your parents come up with Róisín?" she asked.

"Oh lord," Natasha shook her head. "My Mom is obsessive about books, bands and TV and stuff. If she has a kid in the middle then it gets names out of said book, band or TV show. With my older brother she was obsessed with an old movie called 'Love Me or Leave Me.' She named him after two of the actors; Cameron Mitchell and James Cagney. He's Cameron James. With me it was War and Peace and the band 7 Year Bitch. Natasha was after a character in the book, Natasha Rostova and Róisín was after the band's guitarist; Róisín Dunne. Poor Jemmy got the worst of it I reckon. She was named during Mom's obsession with all things Beatrix Potter. She named her Jemimah after the duck," Natasha shook her head.

"I love ducks," Brittany interjected. Natasha smiled before continuing.

"Her middle name is Grace, after Grace Kelly," Natasha had turned back to the mirror and was taking more of her makeup off.

"That's kind of neat though, how all of your names are for something your mom loved," Quinn commented.

"I guess," Natasha shrugged.

"My middle name is Susan," Brittany told her.

"Pretty B," Natasha smiled.

"Santana's is Isabella," Brittany added, smiling cheekily at Santana.

"Personal information, B!" Santana tried to look annoyed but it found it difficult with the look Brittany was shooting her way.

"I won't tell," Natasha giggled. "That's beautiful though." She was surprised when Santana blushed under the green tinge of her zombie makeup.

"What are we going to do?" Quinn sighed helplessly, staring at the forms again.

Glee

In the end they chose to stay on the Cheerios. Finn was furious at Quinn for abandoning their Glee Club family in favour of a cheerleading squad with a coach who was so obsessed with topping herself that she would risk a student's life in order to do it. He ended up scrapping with Sam in the hallway when Sam suggested that Quinn quit Glee because he was a poor leader. Finn's anger had been easier to deal with than Mr Schuester's quiet disappointment in them though. Natasha hadn't been able to stop squirming under the man's sad gaze. And to think she had been forced into this club. Now here she was, not wanting to leave it. Rachel had been right from the very first day. She had found a family there. They busied themselves perfecting their moves and trying to figure out a way to stop Sue from firing Brittany out of that stupid oversized canon.

Come Regional's weekend they still hadn't managed to talk Sue out of the stunt. While they were waiting to get on the bus to go, Brittany had wandered off. The other three found her a few metres away. She was standing with her hands in the pockets of her jacket beside the human canon, staring at it. They walked up to flank her, Santana on one side. Quinn and Natasha on the other.

"I'm gonna die," Brittany said sadly.

"It'll be worth it," Santana said with a shrug.

"Hey!" they heard a voice behind them. The four girls turned, stunned to see Finn Hudson jogging towards them in his football gear.

"What are you doing here?" Quinn asked, angrily.

"Stopping you from going to Sue's Regionals competition. You guys gotta come to the game with me," he told them.

"Haven't you been paying attention?" Quinn snapped. "If we're not Cheerios we're nothing." That actually didn't seem so bad to Natasha.

"You think that but it's not true," Finn argued. "You joined Cheerios to be popular, but you joined Glee Club because you loved it. Sue doesn't care about you guys! She's fine with killing Brittany! Tell me, honestly, if you didn't think it would hurt your reputation, which would you choose?" Finn asked.

"Glee Club," Brittany replied without hesitation. Finn smiled and nodded, stepping closer to Quinn and turning his attention to convincing her.

"I know you," he said softly. "And you don't think you are, but you are strong enough to do this," he stared into her eyes, willing her to find the truth in his. Suddenly she smiled sweetly.

"Ok," she whispered.

"Ok?" he asked.

"Ok," Quinn replied, stronger this time. Finn broke into a grin. He turned to Santana.

"What about you Santana?" he asked, cocking his head. Santana was silent a moment before a grin broke out.

"Screw her, she put me on the bottom of the pyramid," she declared.

"Tasha?" Finn asked.

"I'm with ya," the girl replied without hesitation.

"Come on, we've only got a few minutes," Finn grinned starting to jog away.

"No time for a five-some ladies, bus leaves in five," Sue called out from behind them.

"We quit the Cheerios," Quinn tossed over her shoulder.

"You can't quit Cheerios! It's blood in, blood out. Now get your sweet little cans on that bus!," Sue ordered.

"Oh we still quit," Santana called back.

"Mmmhmmm," Natasha nodded.

"You're my stars! If you leave I have no performance," the panic in Sue's voice was incredibly satisfying to her long suffering 'stars'.

"Sucks for you," Brittany smirked before they turned and followed Finn.

Glee!

They had given an awesome performance; Puck had convinced the football boys to join them and they had had a ball. Even Karofsky had eventually joined in and they had managed to win the Championship game. The football team were heroes in the school after that. They had celebrity status within the halls and they were using it to their advantage. They had organised a mass slushie attack on the hockey team who had slushied them prior to the game. They didn't think the puck-heads would try that again anytime soon.

The Glee Club were starting to plan ways to make money to hire the special bus to get them all to Regionals. Finn came up with the idea to open a kissing booth, much to the disgust of the Glee Club. Mercedes had accused him of just wanting to kiss a bunch of girls and Santana couldn't help but get nasty.

"I have kissed Finn, and let me just say, not worth a buck. I would, however, pay a hundred dollars to jiggle one of his man-boobs," she smirked at him. Natasha ducked her head in the back row, trying not to laugh out loud.

"Don't you ever get tired of running people down?" Finn demanded.

"No not really," Santana replied evenly. Suddenly the whole Glee Club was on the attack against the Latina. When Santana declared that they all loved her and thought she was hilarious, Lauren stated that she was just a bitch. Quinn brought up the barb Santana had thrown at her a few weeks before about being upset that Quinn didn't have a lizard baby, Tina repeated her comment that Mr Schue belonged in a 12 Step Program, and then, to everyone's shock, Rachel got in on the action.

"Truth is Santana, you can dish it out but you can't take it. Maybe you're right, maybe I am destined to play the title role in the Broadway version of 'Willow' but the only job you'll ever have is working on a pole!" she spat viciously, sending the room into stunned silence. Santana felt a lump rising in her throat.

"Fine," she whispered, grabbing her belongings and walking out. She ignored Mr Schue's half-assed protest to get her back. She curled up leaning against her locker, tears pouring down her cheeks until class let out and Brittany came looking for her to comfort her.

Glee!

The next day she stupidly decided to get her own back by picking a fight with Lauren Zizes. Unfortunately she got her ass handed to her and ended up being carried in to the nurse over Coach Beiste's shoulder.

"There you go," the nurse will check you and call your mother to come and get you," Beiste set the girl down on the bed and patted her shoulder comfortingly.

"Thanks," Santana mumbled. Her whole body felt bruised. She shifted on the bed, eyes squeezed shut against the pain, until she found the least painful position possible. She jumped when someone spoke from the other bed in the room.

"What happened," Santana's eyes flew open and she whipped her head to the side. Natasha was lying on the other bed, curled on her side with her arms wrapped around her belly protectively.

"I picked a fight with Lauren Zizes," Santana told her.

"Ouch," Natasha cringed.

"Yeah. Why are you here?" she asked. Her stomach had dropped at the sight of the girl.

"Stomach ache," Natasha replied evasively.

"Right Ms Lopez, let me have a look at you," the nurse walked in. She helped Santana to take her jacket off, leaving her in a black singlet. Natasha cringed, Santana's shoulders were bruising already. The nurse had her lay back and lifted the hem of her singlet to check out her abdomen. Santana was trying to be brave but when the nurse palpated one of the bruises on her rib cage she let out a pained whimper. She heard rustling from the other side of the room and then felt a slightly smaller hand slip into hers. The nurse checked all of the bruised spots, checking for broken bones and other injuries. She squeezed at Natasha's hand and when the nurse stepped away to get her some pain meds, the smaller girl stroked her hair and leaned down to press a kiss to her forehead. Santana was a little stunned by the affectionate actions from the other girl. It must have been written all over her face because Natasha shrugged.

"It sucks being in pain," she told her. Once the nurse had given her the medicine and left to call her Mom, Santana struggled to sit up.

"Let me see," she ordered softly.

"No," Natasha replied. "It's just a stomach ache."

"Natasha-," Santana started.

"I said it's just a stomach ache!" Natasha snapped. She shook her hand free of Santana's and went back to her bed, clearly in pain as she clambered back up and resumed her curled up position from earlier. She was facing Santana but refused to look at her. She turned her face toward the bed but Santana could see tears leaking from the corner of her eye. "I'm sorry. I just don't feel good," she whispered.

"That's ok," Santana whispered back. They lay in silence until Louisa Lopez came to pick up her daughter.

"Fighting Mija? Again," the woman sighed in exasperation.

"I'm sorry," Santana whispered.

"Well maybe getting your ass handed to you will teach you something, huh?" Louisa put an arm around her daughter and helping her up, kissing her temple as she did. Santana just scoffed, a grin breaking out. "Come on," Louisa tugged Santana's hand.

"Wait," Santana turned back to Natasha. "Tash is someone coming to get you?" she asked. Natasha lifted her tearstained face.

"No. Mom can't get off work 'til 3," she replied sadly. Santana looked at the wall clock. It was 11am. She looked at her Mom who nodded.

"Mom will drop you home if you like," she offered.

"No," Natasha replied sharply without a second of hesitation. "Thank you," she added softly afterwards.

"Are you sure sweetheart?" Louisa asked. "Or you can come to our house 'til your Mom gets off work?" she offered.

"No, thank you," Natasha gave a half hearted smile. If she was stuck at Santana's she knew that the girl would interrogate her all day.

"Ok. Feel better," Louisa smiled kindly.

"Yeah, feel better Natasha," Santana sent her a glare that let her know that she was in no way off the hook for this.

Glee!

Natasha kept a low profile at school for over a week. She kept away from her friends and everyone else, shutting herself off. They never did find out where she had been hiding from them. It surprised them then when Natasha texted them all on Saturday morning.

_Jem and I are going to have a picnic in the park. Want to come? It's boring with just the two of us._

Brittany had been at Santana's for the night and Quinn had been at Finn's. She had texted Santana to ask if they were going to meet Natasha and asked her to pick her up when they said they were. On the way to the park, Brittany had insisted on stopping to get some bubble mixture for Jemimah. She couldn't decide between the Tropical and Banana scented ones and so she had ended up getting both. They arrived at the park, armed with food for the picnic, bread for the ducks (at Brittany's insistence) and the bubbles for Jemimah. They found the sisters curled up together on a park bench, talking. It was a very cute sight.

"Tash!" Brittany called out.

"Hey guys," Natasha called back, untangling herself from her little sister. She nudged the little girl.

"Hello," she waved, a small cautious smile breaking out.

"I have something for you," Brittany told her.

"For me?" the little girl seemed stunned.

"Yeah for you," Brittany smiled. She pulled the two small bottles out of her pocket.

"Oh bubbles!" Jemimah beamed as Brittany handed them to her. "Thank you!" she threw her arms around Brittany's waist, hugging her tightly. "Can we blow them now?" she asked excitedly.

"Sure!" Brittany laughed.

"You do the orange ones and I'll do the yellow!" the little girl instructed, handing one of the bottles back to the tall blonde. Soon the two of them were surrounded by a thick cloud of bubbles.

"Oh they smell good!" Jemimah commented sniffing at a bubble that floated toward her nose. "Tashie come and smell the bubbles! They smell like fruit!"

Natasha got up from where she had been sitting next to Quinn and went to stand next to her sister. "Oh wow they smell great," Natasha said as the scents of banana and tropical bubbles reached her nose.

"Wanna blow?" Jemimah asked, holding out the bottle and wand to her sister.

"Hells yeah!" Natasha took them and started blowing bubbles. She blew some straight at Brittany who laughed gleefully and blew some back. Jemimah danced around between them, waving her arms and popping bubbles. She shot away and pulled at Quinn and Santana's hands.

"Come on, come on! It's so much fun! It feels like magic," the little girls cheeks, were flushed, her eyes alight with happiness. The two girls looked at each other and smiled, letting Jemimah pull them over to the other two. Santana felt like a child again as she spun around, her arms out, her head thrown back, while Natasha and Quinn blew bubbles at her from different directions. After a while she got dizzy and collapsed in a heap on the grass, laughing happily as she tried to regain her bearings. Natasha flopped down beside her, canting her head toward Santana and blowing bubbles into the air above the two of them. They both closed their eyes and laughed as the bubbles floated softly down and popped on their faces.

"Jem's right," Santana spoke as they caught sight of Brittany galloping through the cloud of bubbles Quinn was blowing, with the little girl on her back.

"About what?" Natasha asked curiously.

"It is fun and it does kind of feel like magic," Santana smiled, turning her head to look at Natasha. Natasha smiled back and Santana almost gasped. It was the biggest most genuine smile she had ever seen from the other girl, deep dimples cut into her cheeks and her green eyes shone with happiness. Then Natasha was back on her feet, pulling Santana with her and handing her the bottle of bubbles. Santana took them and joined in the blowing.

Glee!

They had used up pretty much all of the bubble mixture before they had stopped for lunch. They had spread out a blanket and sat down together to share the various food they had all brought. Jemimah had settled herself in the vee of Santana's legs, her back against Santana's stomach. They were sharing an orange and Santana was teaching Jemimah to spit the pips that were in it. Natasha had frowned and then cracked up at the disgust on her sister's face when the first pip Jemimah had tried to spit had landed on her own hand.

"That's just a picnic game though Princess," Natasha told her sister. "Mom'll shoot me if you do that at the table!" she laughed. Brittany shuffled over and put one arm behind Natasha leaning on it so she could rest her head on her friend's shoulder. Natasha tensed a bit, still not used to Brittany's frequent and easygoing physical affection, but she soon relaxed and dropped her head against Brittany's for a bit. "Thanks for bringing the bubbles B. They were so much fun," she told her.

"Bubbles are all kinds of awesome," Brittany said happily.

"They really are," Natasha agreed.

Once they had finished eating they went over to the pond to feed the ducks. Jemimah hadn't been too keen but Brittany's childlike excitement had won her over. There weren't that many ducks around, they were just starting to come back after being gone for the winter, but the few that were there came swimming over and then waddled up onto the bank, grabbing the bread greedily. Jemimah was watching Brittany who was sitting still as a statue, her hand held out, a piece of bread resting on the palm. After a few minutes of stillness that Natasha had no idea Brittany possessed, one of the ducks cautiously waddled closer and closer until it reached out and took the bread from the blonde's palm. Brittany laughed and the duck scattered, right toward Santana who shrieked and leaped up against Natasha, who was closest to her, pressing into her hard and fisting her jacket tightly in her hands. Natasha giggled and wrapped her arms around the taller girl.

"Sorry San!" Brittany jumped up and wrapped her arms around both girls. "San's afraid of birds," she whispered to Natasha.

"I noticed," Natasha whispered back.

"Shut up," Santana said petulantly from where she had tucked her face against Natasha's shoulder.

"That's it Jem, sit really still and be really quiet," Quinn's voice instructed softly. Brittany let go of her friends and Santana pulled away from Natasha, glancing sheepishly at the smaller girl. They watched as Jemimah sat still and silent until one of the ducks came up, grabbed the bread she had sitting on her palm and then waddled away quickly to eat it a safe distance away from the little girl. Jemimah burst into giggles and jumped up to get more bread and do it again. After three or four times she got tired of the game and started chasing the ducks instead.

"Aw Jem! Poor ducks!" Natasha called out. Jemimah bent and picked something up, stuffing it in her pocket before continuing to chase the ducks. As they started to waddle closer to the four girls Natasha saw Santana tense out of the corner of her eye. "Jemimah Grace you chase those ducks in the other direction please," she warned. "Santana doesn't like them very much," she said when the little girl looked at her, as if to ask why.

A while later and Jemimah had stopped chasing the ducks and was fossicking about, stuffing things into her pocket every so often. The older girls were sitting on a bench chatting and watching her. Suddenly she stopped looking for things on the ground and came over.

"What time is it Tashie?" she asked her sister nervously.

"It's 2pm, Bub. We'll head home soon but we've got time ok?" Natasha reassured her, but the girls could sense her rising anxiety. They had been able to sense it for the last 10 or 15 minutes.

"Can we go now?" Jemimah seemed to pick on up Natasha's anxiety and her own rose with it.

"If you want to," Natasha smiled, keeping her voice and expression light.

"Ok," Jemimah seemed happy with that. Santana and Quinn traded a glance as Natasha stood, scooping her sister up to sit on her hip. She was way too big to be carried, but years of cheerleading meant that Natasha managed it easily.

"I guess we're going you guys," Natasha said brightly to the other three. "Thanks for an awesome day," she smiled, but it wasn't like the beautiful carefree smiles they had witnessed earlier. This was her usual tight, forced smile.

"Thank you, for inviting us," Quinn beamed back. They all walked back to the cars, Natasha piggy backing Jemimah. When they got to the cars Natasha put Jemimah down and the girl rummaged through her pocket. She pulled something out and hid it behind her back.

"Santana?" she said softly.

"Yeah Jem?" Santana asked.

"I have something for you," Jemimah said shyly.

"Ooh what is it?" Santana asked. Jemimah looked away and slowly produced the item that she had hidden behind her back. It was a tail feather from one of the ducks, and a beautiful one at that.

"I found it for you," Jemimah said it so quietly that Santana had to strain to hear it.

"It's beautiful Jem," Santana replied, her own voice soft and slightly emotional.

"Like you," Jemimah smiled. Santana dropped down and kissed the little girl on the cheek.

"Thank you," she told her. When she stood up she caught sight of unshed tears in Natasha's eyes. She moved to stand next to her as Jemimah rummaged through her pocket again and moved toward Brittany this time.

"I found you a heart stone," she said, handing the object to the blonde. Brittany looked down at the little heart shaped stone in her hand and beamed.

"I love it!" she kissed the little girl too and she blushed. Next it was Quinn's turn. She got a stone too, one that had little indents in it that made it look like a smiley face. While Quinn fussed over her gift, Natasha leaned close to Santana.

"She adores you," she told her quietly. "She told me before that she thinks that you are the prettiest girl ever."

"I have no idea why she likes me so much," Santana admitted, blushing.

"But she does," Natasha replied. "She adores all three of you, but you the most."

"She's met me twice," Santana shook her head.

"Kids are good like that. They only need to meet you once to decide that they love you," Natasha shrugged.

"Time to go Tashie?" Jemimah asked.

"Yeah Bub, time to go," Natasha helped Jemimah buckle herself into her booster seat in the back before closing the door and turning to face her friends. Before she could speak, Brittany had enveloped her in the biggest, warmest hug that she had ever experienced. She hugged back gently until Brittany pulled back. The blonde grinned and ducked her head to plant a kiss on the smaller girl's cheek.

"Thanks for today. It was so awesome!" Brittany smiled happily.

"Yeah it was," Natasha agreed, that genuine smile breaking out again. Santana and Quinn both hugged her quickly before they headed back to their car and Natasha pulled out of the parking lot.

Glee!

Santana invited Brittany and Quinn back to her place for a sleepover that night. Before Cheerios and all of the ensuing drama they had always gone to Santana's for sleepovers. Her Mom had had their basement soundproofed as she composed her own music and wrote her own songs, and Santana's Dad would often be trying to concentrate on his never ending paperwork. It made sense to sleepover in there, they could watch movies and talk and giggle all night long without disturbing anyone. They hadn't done it in so long.

They decided for old time's sake to watch Bring It On, the old cheerleading movie seeming so much cornier now that they were older. But as they had when they were younger, they bounced around, copying all of their routines and laughing their asses off at the ridiculousness of it all. When the end rolled around and Hey Mickey started up in the credits they all got up, dancing carelessly around the room. Brittany was laughing at Quinn and Santana who had their arms wrapped around each other and were swinging around when she heard her phone ring. She picked it up right as the two girls burst loudly into the chorus of the song again.

"Hello?" Brittany tried to block her ear and hold the phone closer to the other.

"Brittany?" a tiny quiet voice asked, so softly Brittany could barely hear it. "-hurt!" was all she heard of the second sentence.

"Hang on a sec," Brittany said to whoever was on the other end.

"Hey guys," she called out. "Guys!" they weren't listening. "GUYS! SHUT UP A SEC!" she yelled. Quinn grabbed the remote and they both looked at her, puzzled. "Hello," she said into the phone.

"Brittany?" the voice asked.

"Yeah?" Brittany confirmed.

"It's Jemimah Isaacs," Brittany suddenly tensed up, causing both Quinn and Santana to start feeling anxious.

"Jemimah? Is everything ok?" Brittany asked.

"No. He came home early and we weren't home and he got SO mad. He hurt Tash and Mommy tried to stop him and he hurt her too and then he hurt Tash some more and I tried to make him stop I _tried! _And he hurt my arm and I hid in the closet and then he went away and Mommy is hiding and she won't talk to me and Tashie won't wake up! Her face is all bleeding, and she's really, really hurt really bad and she WON'T WAKE UP!" the child began wailing hysterically on the other end of the phone.

"Oh my god. Jemimah we're coming ok? We're coming," Brittany told the child, trying to keep her own voice calm.

"Ok. But hurry Brittany. I'm scared," Jemimah wailed.

"Stay on the phone with me J-," The phone suddenly cut off and Brittany panicked. "Jemimah? Jemimah?" she asked helplessly.

"Brittany what's going on?" Quinn asked.

"It was Jemimah. She said 'he' got home early and they weren't there and he got mad and beat them all up. Her, Tasha and their Mom," Brittany sobbed. Santana was heading out of the basement already.

"Come on!" she hollered impatiently, panic seeping in. She quashed that down, knowing it was no good to her right now. "I'll drive, Brittany you call Coach Sylvester and Quinn call Mr Schue," when Brittany went to dial Santana shook her head. "In the car B," she told her. They ran out to the car, barefoot and jacketless, hoping desperately against hope that little Jemimah was exaggerating the situation in her obvious panic but that if Natasha was as bad as she had said she was that they could get there in time.

Glee!

Have written part of the next chapter and hope to get it up fairly soon so as not to leave you all hanging for too long. Hope you enjoyed this one.


	11. Chapter 10

Appearances

**A/N: **This one is a fair bit shorter but the next one will probably be a longer again. Thanks for all of the reviews on the last chapter! They were lovely. I know that they last two chapters were a bit heavy on bits from the show but i'm backing off from that again now.

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Glee…

Glee!

Chapter Ten:

Brittany was becoming increasingly grateful for all those nights that she had followed Natasha home after school, as she directed Santana to the girl's house. She had called Sue Sylvester and she had told them she would meet them there, expressly warning her not to go anywhere near that house until she and Mr Schue were there.

"Should we call the police too?" Quinn asked anxiously as they waited a couple of houses down from the Isaacs'.

"Yeah I think so," Santana replied as she spotted Mr Schue's car coming around the corner. Quinn grabbed her phone and called for the police. As she hung up a couple of minutes later, Sue Sylvester pulled up behind them and got out of her car. They all got out as Mr Schue walked up. Both adults had a baseball bat in hand.

"Did one of you call the police?" Mr Schue asked worriedly. "Whoa," he grunted as Quinn threw herself at him, hugging him tightly. No words could describe her relief at seeing a trusted adult right then.

"Quinn did," Santana replied. She moved toward the house.

"No," Sue told her, a hand on her shoulder. "Will and I go in first, you lot can follow. I know Jemimah said 'he' is gone but 'he' may have come back for all we know," she told her.

"Fine," Santana replied. "Q let go of Mr Schue," she ordered, hauling the blonde off of their teacher so that he could move.

"They said the police would be here in 20 minutes," Quinn told them as they approached the front door.

"Everyone needs to be paying attention to what's around them ok?" Sue warned. The three teenagers nodded solemnly as they reached the darkened house.

The door was just resting shut and Sue opened it gently, walking cautiously inside. The others followed, all on high alert, listening for any sounds that might be out of place. Santana had honestly never been so scared in all of her life, but if there was one thing the Latina was good at it was ignoring strong feelings. She pushed the fear down and placed herself behind Brittany and Quinn, thinking to herself that if they got approached from behind she would probably fare better in an attack than the much more passive Brittany and Quinn would. She prayed it wouldn't come to that though.

"Jemimah?" Sue called out when no sound was detected within the house. There was no answer.

"Jem we came," Brittany called out, her voice shaking. Again there was no answer. They headed further into the hallway and they all nearly died of fright when Brittany suddenly let out a piercing shriek. Sue swung around, bat at the ready, but lowered it immediately when she saw what had frightened Brittany. Jemimah had slipped, unnoticed, from wherever she had been hiding and wrapped an arm around Brittany's leg.

"Oh my god, Jem!" Brittany gasped. Her heart was pounding against her ribs.

"Who is that?" the little girl whispered, staring at Mr Schue.

"That's Mr Schue-," Brittany started.

"From Glee Club?" Jemimah asked.

"That's right," Mr Schue replied gently, crouching to the child's level. He searched her face and fought a shudder at the eerie, detached look in her eyes.

"Tashie likes you. But she said you should quit rapping," the child replied, her voice as devoid of emotion as her face. The teachers at McKinley had to attend a yearly seminar on recognising abuse and responding when they suspected abuse and as part of it they had learned about children's reactions. Some would detach from their emotions, because they were just completely unable to deal with them. He knew this was what he was seeing in the child in front of him and it made him feel sick to his stomach. He forced a smile at her statement though.

"I'll never stop rapping," he told her lightly. "Are you hurt?" he asked her. She eyed him warily, before nodding. "Where are you hurt?" Mr Schue asked her. She didn't answer, she just held out the arm that wasn't wrapped around Brittany's leg, she had previously been holding it against her chest protectively. Mr Schue gently reached out, sliding the sleeve up and he cringed. Her little forearm was black and blue, and swollen, within the bruising he could see small circles with crescent shaped scratches at the top that were darker than the rest of the bruising. Someone had grabbed her arm, hard. "Ouch sweetie," he told her, stroking the back of her hand gently with his thumb. "We're going to take you to the hospital to get that fixed, ok?" he assured her.

"Honey where are your Mom and Natasha?" Sue asked the child. Her emotions finally broke through and Jemimah began to wail in fear like she had on the phone. Brittany picked her up, mindful of her arm and Jemimah used her uninjured arm to point, first at a door a ways down the hall and then at the staircase to their left.

"Ok. Brittany you and Santana take her outside and wait for the police," Sue told them. "Take this with you," Sue handed Santana the bat with a pointed look. Santana saw what the older woman was trying to convey with that look; don't hesitate. She nodded in understanding before she led Brittany back down the hall and out onto the front steps to await the cops. "Q and I will go upstairs, you go that way," Sue said to Mr Schue, gesturing to the door Jemimah had pointed at.

"Ok," he agreed.

Glee!

"Jesus," Mr Schue gasped when he walked into the kitchen. It was a mess, there was food thrown all over the place, pulled from the pantry by the look of it, and cereal crunched under his feet as he walked toward a hunched figure underneath the table. He tucked the bat behind him as he moved toward her, he didn't want to frighten her but he didn't want that bat out of his reach either.

"Hello?" he called gently. The figure tensed slightly. "It's ok, my name is Will Schuester, I'm your daughter's Glee Club teacher," he told her. "Jemimah called us," he kept talking softly as he moved closer. The woman had her knees pulled up and her temple resting on them, she was staring at him through a curtain of long dark hair. One of her arms hung limply, hand resting on the floor, it was obviously very badly broken. Blood had soaked down one leg of her pants and he couldn't see where it was coming from. "We're here to help ok?" he reached slowly toward her. "I'm not going to hurt you, I'm here to help you and Natasha and Jemimah," he told her. He gently touched her shoulder and she tensed violently. He kept his fingers still, resting on her shoulder until she relaxed a little then he slowly lifted her hair from her face. She stared at him in silent terror, the blood on her pants, Mr Schue could see now, was from her streaming nose which looked broken too, black bruises were forming under her eyes. "Jesus," he muttered. His hand was still gently resting at her temple and he shifted it to gently stroke her hair, trying to show her that she could trust him, that he meant no harm to her. She slowly lifted her head, the terror in her eyes subsiding a tiny bit. "What's your name?" he asked her. She averted her eyes, staring blankly to the left of his head. He noticed a small square, under her hair, pinned to the blazer she was wearing. He gently shifted the hair to read the name on the badge. "Genevieve," he read out loud. Before he could say anything else the sound of a shriek from upstairs caused both of their gazes to whip to the kitchen door.

"Someone call 911, get an ambulance now!" Sue hollered through the house.

Glee!

Santana had heard the shriek and following yell from their vantage point on the doorstep.

"Britt the police will be here any minute ok?" she said to the blonde. "Here is my phone, call 911 for an ambulance, tell them that a girl has been beaten up and to get here fast," she said slowly and clearly. Brittany nodded. "I'm going to leave this here," Santana rested the bat against the doorframe. "If you see anyone that isn't a cop, put Jemimah down, stand in front of her, grab that bat and scream for me ok?" Santana asked. Brittany nodded again and Santana prayed to God that this would be one of the few instructions she had given Brittany that she would remember without assistance. She bolted into the house, straight up the stairs and found Sue backing slowly out of a bedroom at the end of the hall, one arm around Quinn's shoulders holding her tightly against her and the other holding the blonde girls head against her chest, her hand wrapped around her forehead.

"Quinn it looks worse than it is," she said in a gentle reassuring voice, but Santana could see in her eyes that she wasn't so sure about that. Santana had reached them by now and looking into the half darkened room she saw what Quinn had seen. Natasha was on the floor, unconscious and covered in blood. Sue's arm left Quinn's head and looped around Santana, leading them both away.

"Santana," she said firmly. Santana once again quashed her rising panic and looked into Sue's eyes.

"B is calling 911," Santana informed her, robotically.

"Good. Santana I need you to take care of Quinn ok? Take her downstairs and wait with Brittany and Jemimah ok?" Sue used the same slow, clear voice that Santana had used with Brittany moments earlier. Santana nodded and felt the panic recede now that she had something to focus on. Sue tightened the arm she had around Santana before releasing her and going back to Natasha. Quinn was trembling from head to toe, her hazel eyes wider than Santana had ever seen them.

"Come on Q," she said gently. She put an arm around Quinn's waist and with one last look over her shoulder to where Sue was crouched next to the injured girl, she led her downstairs and out of the house. As they got to the bottom of the stairs they ran into Mr Schue, who had led Genevieve Isaacs out of the kitchen and was moving to seat her on the stairs.

"Mrs Isaacs?" Santana asked, never having seen the woman before. Mr Schue nodded.

"Genevieve this is Santana and Quinn, friends of Natasha's," he told the woman. She stared blankly through both of them.

"Hello?" a female voice called out then. "This is Officer Jessica Roulston from the Lima Police Department."

Glee!

As Santana had led Quinn away Sue had gone back to Natasha. She turned the bedroom light on and swallowed the nausea that rose to her throat. She knelt next to the badly injured girl. She seemed tinier than ever, bleeding and broken on the floor. She didn't want to touch her, every inch of her body seemed to be cut or bruised. She couldn't even tell for sure if the girl was alive. Sue swallowed hard and pressed her fingers to the girl's neck. It took a couple of shaky attempts but finally, to her utter relief, she felt it. A pulse, slow and thready, but there. Sue sighed deeply in relief. Her eyes scanned Natasha's body, cataloguing injuries. She had been hit in the face, the right side was bruised badly, her eye massively swollen and Sue thought her jaw may be broken too. She had a large cut above her right eyebrow. Her right arm was deformed, her shoulder and elbow both visibly dislocated, the forearm was bent at a bizarre angle, and the bone had come through the skin. She was wearing a pair of pyjama shorts and one of her femurs and her knee looked broken. There was blood everywhere.

"Jesus Christ Natasha," Sue breathed. She reached out and as gently as possible she moved the dark hair out of Natasha's face. She jumped when the girl emitted a tiny whimper and her left eye flickered open. Her arm moved slightly, her hand flexing a couple of times, her eye stared pleadingly at Sue and her hand flexed again. Sue realised what she was trying to communicate and moved to kneel on her other side, taking her hand in hers. Natasha whimpered again, a tear escaping her eye.

"The ambulance is coming honey," Sue heard the cop identifying herself downstairs and felt relief swell within her. "The police are here and the ambulance is coming. Help is coming. Just hang on sweetheart, they're coming ok?" Sue told her, gently stroking Natasha's left temple with her thumb.

"O…kay," came the soft, pained reply. Then Natasha's eye fluttered closed and her hand went limp in Sue's. As she held the small, limp hand in her own, fighting tears she refused to let fall, Sue caught sight of something a couple of feet away…a bloodied baseball bat.

Glee!

The ambulance had arrived about five minutes after the police and Santana had led one of the paramedics upstairs to Natasha while the other stayed with Genevieve and Jemimah, moving away briefly to radio for a second crew to respond. In the midst of all of the action no-one noticed Quinn beginning to fall apart. It wasn't until Santana had come back down stairs, unable to watch them tending to Natasha any longer, that anyone saw her.

"Quinn?" Santana asked when she spotted her. Quinn was doubled over, gripping the wall, she couldn't breathe, she literally just couldn't catch her breath. As Santana approached her she began to sob hysterically. Santana held her in her arms, whispering gently and rubbing her back, trying to get Quinn to match her breath to hers. But it was all to no avail. Quinn just couldn't calm herself down. In fact the more he tried and failed to calm herself down the worse she became. "Someone help!" Santana finally called out frantically. One of the paramedics from the second ambulance that had turned up a few minutes before, came over quickly.

"What's your name honey?" she asked Santana, pulling Quinn more upright in Santana's arms.

"Santana," the Latina replied.

"Santana, and what is your friend's name?"

"Quinn," Santana replied. Squeezing Quinn comfortingly.

"Quinn. My name is Stacey," the woman smiled gently. "Now, Quinn, I'm going to give you something to calm you down ok?" Stacey had actually been watching Santana struggle to calm Quinn down out of the corner of her eye, she had been doing everything right and Stacey had been about to go over and assist when Santana cried out for help. While they had been talking she had taken the girls pulse and was counting her respirations, both of which were extremely quick. She calmly gave the panicked girl a sedative and within a few minutes Quinn's pulse and respirations slowed and she started to go limp and drowsy in Santana's arms. "We're going to have to take her in too, ok?" Stacey told Santana, squeezing her arm gently. "Are you able to contact a parent or someone to meet us there?" she asked the girl.

"Yeah," Santana replied, pulling out her phone and dialling Quinn's mother, the woman answered drunk and Santana hung up angrily after a few minutes of trying unsuccessfully to get through to the woman that her daughter was being taken to the hospital. They carried Natasha past on a stretcher then and two other paramedics led Genevieve out, followed by Brittany carrying a now sleeping Jemimah, complete with her arm in a splint out to the waiting ambulances. Stacey traded places with the male paramedic leading Genevieve out and he came over to Santana.

"Hi I'm Steven," he told her. "I'm going to carry your friend out to the ambulance if that's ok," he told her. Santana surrendered her friend and Steven lifted her easily, carrying her out to a waiting ambulance. They put Natasha in one, Sue climbing in to accompany her. Then they loaded Genevieve, who was beginning to become more 'with it' now, Jemimah and Quinn into the other. Santana, Brittany and Mr Schue would be following them in his car. The cops had told them that they would question them at the hospital, they had already spoken briefly to Mr Schue and Sue as the paramedics did their thing. As the car pulled away from the curb, following the flashing lights ahead, Santana's emotions finally broke free of her hold and she cried desperately in Brittany's arms in the backseat until they reached the emergency room.

Glee!

Thanks for reading and I'll try not to take too long on the next one. But I am back at work tomorrow and it's harder to get anything done through the week with the sheer amount of paperwork that they make preschool teachers do on work nights over here. *eye roll*.


	12. Chapter 11

Appearances

**A/N: **Ok I guess I lied last chapter about how long it would take to get this one up! I was on a roll and I couldn't just stop! So I stayed up half the night writing this chapter and I was so very, very tired at work today, so tired in fact that while i was trying to get a child to sleep, he almost managed to pat _me_ to sleep instead... Anyway enjoy this one.

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Glee…

Glee!

Chapter Eleven:

Once they arrived at the hospital, Mr Schue, Santana and Brittany found Sue in the waiting room. Natasha had been whisked away for a battery of tests and inevitably surgery to fix her badly broken bones and any other damage that they might uncover along the way. They sat side-by-side in chairs, all pale and anxious. They sat quietly in the Saturday night ruckus of the ER, every drunken moron ever born seemed to be there. After nearly an hour a nurse came out.

"Excuse me, I'm looking for friends of Quinn Fabray?" she called into the very full waiting room.

"Here," Mr Schue stood up, quickly followed by the others

"Are you her mother and father?" the nurse asked sceptically, eyeing Mr Schue and Sue.

"Her teachers," he told her. The nurse frowned disapprovingly. "Where are her parents?"

"I called her Mom but she's fall-on-your-ass drunk and her Dad basically disowned her, not that I know how to contact him anyway," Santana informed her. The nurse softened a little bit.

"Lovely," she commented. "I guess we can try to contact the mother in the morning. No other family? Grandparents?" she asked.

"Not in Lima," Santana replied.

"Well…She's asking for you anyway. She's very groggy from the sedative and she's pretty upset," The nurse told them. "Follow me." They followed her into the admitting bay where she led them to one of the many curtained cubicles. "Just in here," she told them. "You're welcome to stay as long as you like as long as you behave," she told them sternly, before walking away.

"Hey," Santana said softly as she walked into the cubicle. Quinn looked so small and vulnerable curled up under a warm blanket, white as a sheet and blinking rapidly as if she was struggling to keep her eyes open.

"Hey," she said shakily. "Are they ok?" she asked.

"We don't know anything yet," Santana replied.

"Damn it," Quinn replied, tears spilling down her cheeks. "Where's my mom?" she asked. Her face fell when Santana abruptly severed eye contact and Brittany climbed up onto the bed, cuddling up against her side. "Oh. Drunk," she whispered. Brittany cuddled her tighter, burrowing her head against the other blonde. Soon the taller blonde was sobbing uncontrollably and mumbling something about rainbows and unicorns. Poor Quinn looked absolutely bewildered and Santana wanted to cry too but she found that after her marathon bawling session in the car she was just too tired. Mr Schue moved to stand beside the bed, rubbing Brittany's back soothingly.

"They'll be ok Brittany. They will," he tried to comfort her. Santana sat next to Quinn on the other side of the bed, holding Quinn's hand in one of hers and stroking Brittany's hair with the other. Ten minutes later both blondes were sound asleep. Santana sighed and shifted to sit on one of the chairs that the nurse had kindly brought in for them.

"Santana maybe you should call your parents, and Brittany's Mom," Sue suggested. "Let them know what's going on?"

"Yeah ok," Santana dragged herself tiredly out of the cubicle to the pay phones she had seen on the far wall as the nurse had led them in.

Glee!

By the time Santana got back the police had arrived. They took Mr Schuester first, then Sue, then they came and got Santana. Being that she was a minor they allowed Sue, as her teacher, to sit with her as she gave her statement. Santana recounted everything that had happened that night and the incidents prior and by the time she was done she was exhausted. The police had asked a thousand questions and it had occurred to Santana during this questioning that she really knew very little about the girl. She had no idea where her dad was, she had no idea where her brother was, if one of them may have done this, if there was anyone else who might have done this. It kind of made her sad. Once she was done the police woke Brittany to talk to her and then Quinn had insisted on giving her statement then too. By the time they were done it was after 3am.

Santana fell asleep soon after, awkwardly positioned across two chairs. Brittany was curled up with Quinn again, singing to herself softly as she often did when she was very upset, and Quinn was asleep again too. Mr Schue and Sue were keeping watch over the three of them. An older nurse came in just after 7am to check Quinn.

"Hi sweetie," she said warmly as she checked Quinn's pulse. "I need to check your blood pressure then I can discharge you," she told her. Quinn obediently held out an arm. Once she was done the nurse patted her shoulder. "I'll organise your discharge papers then we can take you all up to see your other friends," she told her. Sue and Mr Schuester jumped up at that.

"How are they?" Mr Schue asked.

"I can't actually tell you that but they're asking for you. So I'll organise these papers and take you up. It should be 8am by then, visiting hours," she told them, with a reassuring smile.

"Thank you," Mr Schuester told her.

Glee!

It was nearly 10am by the time they managed to get Quinn discharged. They needed to discharge her to a parent or guardian and so Sue had gone to the Fabray's and dragged an unimpressed, hungover Judy Fabray back to the hospital to sign the papers to get her daughter out. Quinn refused to speak to or even look at her as she fussed over her in her usual over-the-top, 'I'm sorry I was too drunk to care last night' way. Once Quinn was free, Judy had taken a cab home and the nurse led them up to the ward that the Isaacs' were in. Mr Schuester and Sue waited in the waiting room while the nurse led the three girls in to the room.

"Hi Santana, hi Quinn, hi Brittany" Jemimah smiled sadly when she saw them. "I got a pink cast," she showed them her plastered arm.

"Pink is the best colour," Santana smiled tiredly, sitting on the bed and scooping the girl into her lap.

"Yeah," Jemimah yawned. She looked at tired as Santana felt. Genevieve Isaacs was watching them closely.

"Hi," Santana smiled at her. "I'm Santana."

"Genevieve," the woman replied, managing a small smile of her own. Her arm was plastered up to her armpit and there was a band aid on her nose. "You two must be Brittany and Quinn?" she asked.

"I..I'm Quinn," Quinn replied.

"I'm Brittany. Obviously," Brittany had moved to sit next to Santana, stoking Jemimah's cast.

"I hear a lot about you three," Genevieve told them. "I wish we didn't have to meet like this though," she said sadly.

"How's Tash?" Quinn asked.

"Still in surgery," Genevieve replied. "There's a lot to fix," her chest began to hitch and she burst into tears. Brittany moved to sit in the chair next to her bed, squeezing her uninjured arm gently. She didn't speak, just sat quietly next to the crying woman. Genevieve stopped crying fairly quickly. She looked at Brittany curiously before giving her a tiny smile. "Thank you," she whispered. Brittany just squeezed her arm again.

"How…how bad?" Quinn had to ask. Santana glared at her.

"Seven broken bones and some tissue damage," Genevieve told her, tears running down her cheeks again.

"Mommy don't cry," Jemimah wriggled down from Santana's lap and Brittany lifted her up to sit next to her mother.

"I'm ok baby," Genevieve replied, pulling herself together and hugging her daughter. "Is Coach Sylvester here? And uh…Will?" she asked. "His name is Will right?" she asked, screwing up her forehead in concentration. Pain meds were making her foggy.

"Yeah, Will Schuester. They're here," Santana replied. "They're in the waiting room," she told her.

"Can they come in?" she asked.

"I'll get them," Quinn told her. She went out to the waiting room, finding Helen Pierce and Louisa Lopez in the waiting room now too. She felt a lump rise to her throat at the absence of her own mother. Helen spotted her first, leaping up and throwing her arms around her.

"Are you ok sweetheart?" she asked. "Oh stupid question of course you're not!" she pulled back, cupping her pale cheeks before leaning down and kissing her forehead. "God look how pale you are," tears were pouring down Helen's cheeks now. She hugged Quinn tightly again before letting her go. Before she could move she was wrapped gently in another pair of arms and she recognised the scent of Santana's Mom's perfume. Louisa didn't say anything, just kissed her cheek and smoothed her hair before moving away again.

"Mr Schue, Coach Sylvester, Natasha's mom wants to see you guys," she said softly, still trying to swallow the lump in her throat. The two teachers stood, following Quinn back into the room. Genevieve sat up straighter as they came in.

"I just wanted to say thank you. To all of you, for all that you did for us last night," she spoke softly. "I owe you all. So much," none of them missed the guilt in her eyes. "Girls, can I get you to take Jemimah for a walk?" she asked. "I need to speak to Coach Sylvester and Will. Privately," she asked.

"Sure," Quinn told her. "You guy's moms are here, they probably want to see you," she told the other two. Jemimah allowed Quinn to pick her up and carry her to the waiting room. As soon as they walked in Louisa and Helen seized their daughters, hugging them fiercely, making the lump rise in her throat again.

"How come your Mommy isn't here Quinn?" Jemimah asked, confused.

"My mommy doesn't love me enough to be here," Quinn said without thinking, eyes focussed on the ground as she fought back tears. The warmth of a hand and the scratch of plaster against her cheeks caused her to look up. Jemimah held her face gently in her small hands; her green eyes stared lovingly into Quinn's sad hazel ones.

"Don't be sad Quinn," she said softly. "_I_ love you."

Glee!

"Who did this?" Mr Schue asked, as soon as the girls had left. "Did you tell the police?"

"Yes," Genevieve nodded, tears pooling in her eyes. "I told them everything. I should have told them years ago. I should have done something. This never should have happened," she lifted her head to look at them. "I wanted to tell you, because they just, won't understand this. They're just kids," Genevieve shook her head. "And it's up to Tasha to tell them anyway."

"How is she?" Sue asked.

"She's still in surgery at the moment. She has a lot of broken bones that they need to fix," Genevieve told them. "But they said that none of her injuries are life threatening."

"Thank God," Mr Schue sighed in relief.

"He hit her with a fucking bat. For taking her sister to the park on a Saturday!" Genevieve suddenly blurted out.

"Who? Your husband?" Mr Schue asked.

"No, not my husband," Genevieve fought to keep her emotions under control. "My son." For the next half an hour Sue and Mr Schue sat and listened while Genevieve told them about how things had started going wrong. Her eldest son, Cameron, had been a regular child up until he was around fourteen. When he hit fourteen he became aggressive, angry and violent. He seemed to target the then nine year old Natasha, probably because she was so much smaller than him. One day he had bitten her so badly that she had needed stitches. He had laughed at her when she cried and showed absolutely no remorse. But they hadn't taken him to a doctor or anything because something had usually set him off and Genevieve and her husband Greg had felt like the doctors would just tell them it was bad parenting. So they had taken to grounding him and punishing him for the outbursts when they happened. By the time they realised it was really a deep-seated problem, Cameron was seventeen years old, six foot four inches tall and weighed two hundred pounds. When they suggested he go to a doctor about his anger, he had broken his father's nose and told him he would kill him if he ever suggested that again.

From there the anger got worse and worse. Anything would set him off, he terrorised the whole family. After Jemimah was born he used threats of violence against her to keep his parents and sister under his thumbs. His reign of terror had carried on for another three years and then Genevieve had gotten pregnant again. Cameron was furious. He told his mother to abort it but by then it had been too late, she was already 16 weeks. He swore black and blue that he was going to kill the baby as soon as it was born. Genevieve and her husband had devised a plan then, to try and get away from Cameron. Genevieve would have the baby and Greg would take him and run. He would buy a house and get settled and then Genevieve would take the girls one night and contact him through an anonymous email that he would set up.

Cameron was furious when his father and the baby never came home. He realised what Genevieve's plan was and he had gone on a rampage, destroying their house and he had held Natasha – still his favourite target – at knife point for nearly six hours while he ranted and raved. That had been six months ago. He had somehow discovered that Greg and the baby were living somewhere around Lima at the same time that the business with the Amazons went down and he moved them, under the guise of giving Natasha a fresh start somewhere new. He had gotten himself an office job, working on a computer because Genevieve didn't make enough money to hire the private investigator he claimed he needed to find his father. Genevieve had never been able to get the window of opportunity that she needed to take the girls and run and so Cameron's reign of terror continued on.

Yesterday he had come home an hour early and became enraged that Natasha had taken Jemimah to the park. He had become increasingly paranoid since they had moved. He was sure that if Natasha was making friends and socialising that he would get found out. So he waited by the front door with a bat until she had gotten home. He had cracked her in the knee with it first, and then Jemimah had screamed and screamed. Genevieve had tried to get to her and he had turned on her, she ran into the kitchen and he followed tearing the place apart, terrorising her before he had brought the bat down toward her head. She had thrown her arm up and the bat had broken her arm and with the angle he had hit her at; her arm had smashed into her nose, breaking that too. When she had hit the floor he had gone in search of Natasha again. Dazed and injured Genevieve had no idea what had gone down after that. She had no idea how Natasha had ended up upstairs.

Glee!

"You must think I'm terrible," Genevieve hung her head in shame when she was finished.

"I think you were terri_fied_," Sue said gently. They sat silently for a while. The awful truth of what the Isaacs' life was hung heavy in the air between them. A nurse broke the silence, quietly opening the door.

"Mrs Isaacs your daughter is out of surgery. Her surgeon is here to speak with you," she told her.

"We'll leave-," Mr Schue began.

"No, please stay," Genevieve begged. Mr Schue sat back down. The surgeon, Dr Marcott, was a kind, gray haired man who sat on the edge of Genevieve's bed and held her hand gently in both of his as he informed her of her daughter's condition.

"Natasha is doing very well, all things considered," he told her, his voice soft with a southern lilt to it. "We have stabilised her eye socket and wired her jaw 'til it heals. We've reconstructed her knee and plated and screwed her femur. She's got a big ol' brace on that leg and she'll be in that for 8 weeks or maybe longer, depending on how she heals. We popped her shoulder back in and straightened up her elbow, we had to glue some bone together in there to fix that up and we had to put plates in her arm too so she's in a special back slab cast so that we can keep an eye on the incisions from that. There were no internal injuries, but she's got a lot of bruising. She's heavily sedated and very full of pain meds at the moment and it may be a few days or longer before the pain settles enough for us to wean her off of the sedation," Dr Marcott explained. "She's in recovery at the moment and after that she'll go to step down care, which is where she will be 'til we can get her off the sedatives. They monitor more closely in there than on the ward so she will be in good hands." He smiled kindly again. "I've instructed the nurses to call up here the second they move her to step down so that you can see her. That'll be a few hours yet though," Genevieve was nodding, trying to take it all in. "Do you have any questions?" Dr Marcott asked.

"Will she be able to walk ok again?" Genevieve asked. "She's a dancer. She loves to dance," her voice shook.

"Well it's going to take time, a lot of time," Dr Marcott replied truthfully. "But she's a healthy, fit, seventeen year old girl, if she works hard at it with the physiotherapists she'll certainly be dancing again one day. She looks like a tough little cookie to me," he smiled.

"She's a fighter," Genevieve smiled at the man's keen observation of her daughter. Dr Marcott smiled and patted her shoulder before he said goodbye and left.

Glee!

While the adults spoke, the girls entertained Jemimah in the waiting room. There was a basket of books and toys and when Jemimah had decided that the toys were boring and all of the books were 'lame', Santana had used her little known talent for creative storytelling to make up a story on the spot about 'Pirate Jem and her Pretty Pink Cast'. Jemimah and Brittany were cuddled together on the floor in front of Santana's chair, enthralled as Santana told them how Pirate Jem had chased away the scary blue sea tigers with her pretty pink cast which, as it turned out, had magical powers. Quinn watched the scene from a distance, still feeling upset about her lousy excuse for a mother not being there. She found herself waiting and hoping that her mother might show up. She just needed her Mom so badly right now and the woman couldn't pull herself away from her own life long enough to be there for her. The lump in her throat came back when Helen got up to go to the bathroom, spontaneously bending to kiss Brittany's hair as she passed her daughter. Tears pooled in her eyes and she found herself viciously wishing that Helen was her mother or even just that Judy would show her any form of affection at all. She sat silently, trying to hold herself together. It worked for a little bit longer before her need for comfort was just too strong. She stood, walking over to where Helen had sat back down a few moments earlier, her eyes so blurred with tears that she could barely see where she was going.

"Helen?" she asked, her voice shaking badly.

"Yes honey," Helen had yet to look up.

"Can I have a hug?" it came out as a broken sob. Helen was on her feet in an instant.

"Oh baby, come here," she hugged the blonde girl tightly as she sobbed her heart out. She led her away from the others to the couch Quinn had been sitting on before. She sat down and pulled Quinn beside her, before pulling the young girls legs up across her lap so that she could hold her tightly. She rocked her gently and whispered comfortingly to her until her sobs began to subside.

"My mom sucks," Quinn sobbed out, sending herself bawling again.

"Where is she?" Helen asked gently, rubbing Quinn's back soothingly.

"At home. Hungover," Quinn replied calming down enough to talk fairly quickly, a small hiccupping sob breaking out. She took a big breath. "Santana rang her to say I was in the hospital, sedated for a panic attack last night and she was so drunk she didn't care," Quinn's ragged, uneven breathing made it hard for her to even get the words out.

"Honey I'm sorry. Mine was the same," Helen said softly. "She was so wrapped up in herself that she had no idea how much she was hurting my sister and me. That's why I don't drink. I saw what it did to her," Helen pushed Quinn back a little bit, palming her cheeks to dry her tears. "It's not that your mom doesn't love you Quinn. She does, with all of her heart, I'm sure. She's just got no idea how to show it. Sometimes I wonder if Judy has any idea that she _needs _to show it. My mother just assumed we knew I think. I swore I would be better for my own girls, that I'd show them I loved them so often it'd drive them crazy." Helen smiled. "And I know it drives Amelia crazy. Brittany on the other hand…Affection is like oxygen to that girl. She just can't live without huge amounts of it," they both looked over at the other blonde and just as Helen finished speaking, Brittany's hand shot out to grab Santana's pulling it to cup her cheek. "Case in point," Helen chuckled. Quinn managed a giggle too.

"You're an awesome mom Helen," Quinn whispered, blushing and snuggling her head back onto Helen's shoulder.

"Thank you," Helen kissed Quinn's hair. "And honey, I know it's hard but I think you should try talking to your mom. Preferably when she hasn't got a drink in hand," Helen sighed. "Tell her how you feel. I left it 'til my mom was dying to do it and realised far too late that if I'd said something earlier, things could have been very different. You've got nothing to lose by trying. And Quinn," Helen pushed Quinn back a little and cupped her face again, "Anytime you want to talk or if you just need a hug and no-one's around you come to me ok? Anytime. I don't care if it's 3am," Helen told her. "Ok?" Helen searched Quinn's eyes. Quinn nodded, smiling a little.

"Ok," she whispered. Helen gave her another tight hug and Quinn felt her lips press against her hair. When she let go, Quinn climbed out of her lap and headed to the bathroom to wash her face. She cringed at the sight of her puffy, blotchy skin. She bent over the sink, splashing water on her face and she jumped when a voice spoke behind her.

"Quinn?" It was Santana, looking younger and more vulnerable than Quinn had ever seen her look. Her hair was a mess, her makeup all but gone, dark circles under her eyes from lack of sleep. "Are you ok?" she asked.

"Yeah. I'm ok," Quinn smiled a little bit. "Are you?" she asked. Santana's face crumbled immediately and she shook her head hard, almost as if she was trying to shake the tears away. Quinn stepped forward, wrapping her arms around her. Santana's arms wound around her back, her face found the crook of Quinn's neck and she hung onto her for dear life as sobs wracked her small frame. Quinn just held her tightly, not knowing what else to do, never ever having seen Santana cry like this before. She had seen her hysterical drunken bawling of course, everyone had seen that more times than they could count. She had seen her cry legitimately a few times, like when she almost broke her arm at Cheer Camp and when her Abuela had died but this was different. This was the kind of desperate broken crying that almost ripped you in two. She continued to hold Santana tightly, for an unmeasured amount of time until, to Quinn's relief; Louisa came in, looking for her daughter. The woman looked at the pair for a moment and rushed forward, wrapping both of them in her arms. It was only then that Quinn realised that she was sobbing again too. Louisa, crying herself now, whispered comfortingly in a mixture of Spanish and English. Santana calmed quickly, with her mom whispering comfortingly to her. Her breathing slowed and evened out a bit. She lifted her head slowly from Quinn's shoulder.

"Sorry," she whispered, her voice hoarse from crying. "I got tears and snot all over you."

"No different from most weekends," Quinn quipped, a dig at Santana's hysterical drunken bawling episodes. It had the desired effect of making Santana laugh. Louisa rolled her eyes and shook her head, a smile breaking out at the last moment.

"Ok Mija?" Louisa asked her daughter. Santana nodded tiredly. "Good. I came to find you because Mr Schue and Sue came back and wants to talk to us all," She told them. Both girls quickly washed their faces before heading back out to the waiting room. On the way Louisa tugged Quinn back long enough to kiss her cheek and whisper a 'Thank you' in her ear. When they got back Brittany planted herself in between Quinn and Santana, hanging onto both of them tightly. Jemimah was gone, presumably back with her mother.

"Ok so the surgeon has just been in to see Genevieve," Mr Schue told them. "Natasha is out of surgery and doing pretty well all things considered," he took a deep breath before the next part. "She's beat up pretty badly though. She's had a fractured eye socket, broken cheek bone and jaw. They had to reconstruct cartilage in her knee and screw a plate to her femur, she's got two plates in her arm and they've had to glue her elbow joint back together and she had dislocated the elbow, her shoulder and her kneecap," he stopped, letting that all sink in. He was met with three sets of wide, fearful eyes. "They said that it's going to take time but that if she's willing to work at it that she will heal up pretty nicely. She may not be as good as she was before but if she works hard she won't be too far off. It's going to take time and effort though," he stressed.

"Where is she now?" Santana asked.

"In recovery for the next few hours. She's heavily sedated and full of pain meds and will be for quite a while. They're hoping to move her to something called step down care by tonight where she'll stay until they can start weaning her off the sedatives. We can't see her today, I'm sorry but they said if she's doing ok tomorrow afternoon they will let us in to see her then," he explained.

"The plan is for us all to go back to the Lopez's now for some food and sleep, ok?" Helen told them. They nodded gratefully, needing the food and sleep, but needing to be together now more than anything else.

Glee!

Longer than the last one at least! It's getting more and more draining to write this story at the moment so if I slow off the pace that's probably why. It will start lightening up eventually but for now the angst and drama reign supreme… thanks for reading/reviewing/favouriting/alerting!


	13. Chapter 12

Appearances

**A/N: **The Unholy Trinity visit Tash in the hospital and the rest of the Glee Club learn of the weekend's events…bit of angry swearing in this one.

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Glee…

Glee!

Chapter Twelve:

"I hate seeing them all so shaken and scared," Louisa whispered to Helen. They were standing in the doorway to Santana's bedroom, watching their daughters and Quinn sleep. They had put out a mattress for one of them to sleep on but they had come back to find them all squished in Santana's bed in a tangled mess of bodies. Quinn was in the middle, on her tummy as always, one hand under her chin and the other tangled up in one of Brittany's hands behind her. Brittany was on her side, the arm not tangled with Quinn's was thrown over the other blonde, her hand tightly grasped in Santana's. Santana had one arm tucked tightly against Quinn's side and was curled around with her head resting on the blonde's shoulder blade while she held Brittany's hand.

"Me too," Helen replied. She reached out, catching Louisa's hand and giving it a brief squeeze before releasing it. "Remember how we would always find them like this when they were younger?" she asked, small smile touching her lips as she recalled happier times.

"Yeah. Even when I'd set up three separate mattresses in the basement, I'd come to check on them and they would have pushed them together and fallen asleep all tangled up. They were so close," Louisa smiled at the memory. "Then they joined the Cheerios and suddenly it was just Britt and Santana. Quinn was the one they all sucked up to in person and bitched out big time about behind her back. They stopped inviting her over. Everything became about finding new ways to stab her in the back," Louisa said sadly, pulling her daughter's bedroom door shut and heading back to the lounge.

"But they seem to have put that aside for now," Helen commented. "Which is a great thing, because they're really going to need each other right now."

Glee!

Santana had no idea what had woken her. She cracked one eye open, and groaned at the light that seeped in. They had left the bedside lamp on when they had fallen asleep. She glanced at her bedside alarm clock; it was 3am.

"Ugh," she groaned rolling onto her back, gently disentangling herself from Quinn's tight hold as she did. She lay still a moment before she realised what had woken her. She could hear soft crying coming from the other side of the bed. "Britt-Britt?" she mumbled, sleepy concern lacing her voice.

"San?"came the shaky reply.

"What's wrong?" Santana asked, dragging herself into a sitting position, peering over at the blonde. Brittany was curled up on the edge of the bed, knees to her chest, hugging herself.

"I had a bad dream," Brittany replied, hiccupping in the middle. Santana assessed the situation. Brittany would want to cuddle until she fell back to sleep but Quinn was in the way. Santana stood, slid her arms under the blonde and lifted her, shifting her into the spot that she had just vacated, pulling the covers up over her. Quinn barely even stirred. Santana made her way to the other side of the bed, nudging Brittany until she moved into Quinn's old spot and Santana climbed in behind her. She spooned up against her friend, slipping a leg between hers and one arm under her to wrap around her waist. With her free hand, Santana reached up and brushed Brittany's soft blonde hair away from her face. Wrapped lovingly in her best friend's arms, Brittany's crying quickly began to quiet. After a few minutes she turned in Santana's arms to face her. Santana lifted her free hand again to wipe the tear tracks from the blonde's face. Brittany smiled a little, catching the hand and placing a kiss on the palm, then one on the wrist.

"Do you want to tell me?" Santana asked, smiling slightly at the affectionate actions. Brittany's face clouded over and she shifted, wrapping her arms around Santana's waist and tucking her head under the dark haired girl's chin.

"I dreamed that we were too late," Brittany burst into tears again. She didn't have to elaborate any further. Santana knew exactly what she meant and that thought sent chills cascading down her spine.

"We weren't too late B. We weren't. I know it's so easy to slip into 'what ifs', but you just have to keep reminding yourself that we did get there in time," Santana's voice broke at the last second and she sucked in a shaky gasp in an attempt to control her emotions. Brittany lifted her head, peering into Santana's dark, dark eyes, seeing Santana's own 'what ifs' lurking in there.

"This is all just so awful," Brittany said sadly.

"I know B. I know," Santana replied. She was about to say something else when suddenly Brittany's lips were on hers, gentle and warm and seeking as well as giving comfort. Santana kissed back equally gently, shifting them so that Brittany was on her back and Santana on her stomach beside her. They traded gentle, comforting and increasingly sleepy kisses back and forth until a voice caused them to jump apart.

"Ew. With me in the bed? Really?" Quinn was propped up on her elbows, blonde hair all over the place, her voice laced with sleepy disgust.

"It's my bed Tubbers. Deal," Santana dropped a brief kiss onto Brittany's lips to illustrate her point. Quinn gave her a filthy look and Santana smirked. "You're just jealous it's not you I'm macking on," she added a sultry look to the smirk.

"Um, no. I'm really not," Quinn replied, smiling at Brittany who beamed back. Suddenly Santana's smirk dissolved into fear when she realised that she had pretty much outed herself to Quinn. "You can't tell anyone about this. If you do I will end you!" she snarled. Quinn watched as Brittany's face fell as Santana moved away from her on the bed, breaking contact completely.

"Santana cool off," Quinn sighed irritably. "What you do with Brittany in the privacy of your own bed is your business. That said you could at least have the common decency not to do it while I'm in the bed with you."

"We weren't 'doing' anything," Santana grumbled. "Britt had a nightmare, I was making her feel better," Santana looked at Quinn, a searching look in her eyes and something Quinn almost couldn't place, it being so foreign on Santana: vulnerability.

"Whatever you say," Quinn smirked. She lay down and pulled the covers up to her chin. She pushed herself up a little when the bed started moving. Santana and Brittany were trading places. "What are you doing?" Quinn asked nervously.

"Switching places," Santana supplied, grunting as Brittany elbowed her in the stomach in her quest for comfort.

"Why?" Quinn demanded grumpily.

"San doesn't like it when I climb over her when I get thirsty or have to pee," Brittany explained. Brittany turned off the lamp that they had left on, plunging them into darkness. The room was still and silent for a moment then Quinn felt hot breath on her ear.

"You know you're jealous," came the teasing whisper. Quinn almost leaped out of her skin when full lips brushed the corner of hers. Quinn froze briefly, but then she heard Santana's breathing change as the Latina tried desperately to hold back a laugh and she reached out to thump her on the arm.

"Fuck you Santana!" Quinn tried to growl but she ruined it by laughing at the last second at her friend's failed attempt at messing with her.

"Goodnight Quinn," Santana said suggestively, causing all three of them to break into giggles again.

Glee!

"I'm scared to see her San," Brittany whispered, clutching at Santana's hand and playing with the bag she was holding in the other. Their mothers had gotten them the day off so that they could rest and visit Natasha just after lunch. They had had a call from Genevieve that morning, saying that Natasha was already mostly off of the sedatives. She was still doped up to her eyeballs on painkillers but she was awake, fairly alert and asking for her three friends.

"It'll be ok B," Santana told her firmly, more to convince herself than the blonde. They stood in the corridor outside of Natasha's room, waiting for the nurse to finish checking her vitals before they went in to see her. Helen and Louisa were in the waiting room a small way down the hall. "Ok ladies, you can go in. Just try to keep it quiet and calm ok? She needs her rest," the nurse smiled at the girls as she exited the room.

"Oh God," Quinn muttered softly. She sucked in a couple of breaths before following Brittany and Santana to the room. Santana was the first to enter and she fought the gasp bubbling up from her throat. Brittany took one look at Natasha's badly bruised and swollen face and burst into tears.

"I'm sorry!" she whimpered as Santana pulled her into a corner and hugged her tightly.

"S'okay," Natasha rasped softly. Quinn felt relief flood her at the sound of the girl's voice, it overtook her shock and Quinn managed a smile.

"Hi sweetheart," she whispered, stepping up to the bed. "How are you doing?" she asked. She looked awful. The bruising had really set in now, most of the skin that Quinn could see was black and blue. One leg was in a large brace, one arm was in a back slab from her wrist to her armpit. Her face was even more swollen than it had been the day before.

"I'm enjoying my drugs," Natasha's lips quirked up and Quinn laughed.

"Good on you," she laughed. She eyed Natasha's uninjured arm, she wanted to pick up her hand but the IV stuck in the back of it looked painful and Quinn didn't want to cause Natasha any more pain.

"Tash?" Brittany said softly, her breath still coming in slightly ragged gasps.

"Hey sweetie," Natasha managed a tiny smile again. "Don't cry. I bet it looks a shitload worse than it feels." Brittany swallowed hard. She reached into the plastic bag she was holding and produced the stuffed cat she had picked out from the gift shop for Natasha, tucking it gently against her cast arm. Natasha's swollen face lit up when she saw the cat. "So cute," she told the blonde. A small sob escaped from Brittany and fresh tears cascaded down her face. She sucked in a gasp and reached into the bag again.

"I…brought you…my iPod…to borrow. They won't…let me…get yours yet," Brittany's words were punctuated by gasps and small sobs. She placed the device along with headphones on the table next to Natasha's bed. The tall blonde took a deep shaky breath before pulling out the other objects that she had brought.

"Amelia said you could borrow her portable DVD player, 'cause she never uses it. And we picked out some DVD's for you too," Santana explained softly. "You might not be up to it now but it's there if you get bored," she smiled nervously.

"I put chose some books for you. Your Mom said you love to read," Quinn told her. "I didn't know what you liked though so I just chose some of my favourites."

"You guys rock," Natasha said in that same raspy voice.

"Who did this? I need to know so I can kill the bastard," Santana suddenly blurted. Natasha jumped fearfully. "Sorry, I'm sorry," Santana apologised quickly, pulling her anger back under control.

"My brother. Cam," Natasha told them, surprising them all. "My mom told Schue and Sue. I thought they would have told you," Natasha said softly.

"They said it was up to you, what you wanted people to know," Quinn told her.

"Nice of them," Natasha said tiredly. She yawned awkwardly and painfully, her sore, wired jaw pulling at the action, making her wince. "Ouch," she groaned. Another sob slipped from Brittany's lips.

"I wish I could make you better," she managed to get out. Natasha was slipping off to sleep now but she managed to speak again.

"I know B. You're too sweet," Her words were vague and she fought sleep.

"Go to sleep," Quinn whispered. "It's ok."

"Hold my hand," Natasha kept fighting the fast invading sleep, lifting her arm ever so slightly. Quinn gently slid her hand under Natasha's, cradling it gently in her own, careful not to bump her IV cannula and hurt her. Natasha's eyes fluttered shut and her breathing evened out quickly as she gave in to sleep.

"Are we allowed…to stay?" Brittany asked, still crying softly.

"I don't know B but I'm not leaving yet," Santana whispered. She sat in one of the chairs next to the bed and pulled Brittany into the one beside it. "Where's that pen and paper you brought?" she asked. Brittany pulled them out of the bag and handed them over. Quinn sat down in another chair on Natasha's other side, still holding her hand. She felt the overwhelming panic building inside her and took a few deep calming breaths. It wasn't helping. She lifted her other hand to Natasha's and started doing something that she hadn't done in a long time; she prayed. She prayed that the police would find Cameron Isaacs, she prayed that Natasha's wounds would heal well, she prayed that Natasha would have the mental and emotional strength to get through this. She prayed with everything that she had in her, she had no idea for how long until she heard giggling from the other side of the bed. She lifted her head, feeling totally calm now and saw Santana and Brittany hunched over a lined writing pad, Santana's left hand flying over the page, sketching something out. There were several sheets of paper resting on Natasha's braced leg. Quinn reached over and picked them up. She laughed at the top one. It was a sketch of Mr Schue with a baseball cap on backwards, seemingly rapping, the second one was of Rachel in the midst of a high note, face scrunched up, arms out, looking totally ridiculous, the third was of Natasha sulking in her seat, the fourth and last one was of Finn looking blank. Quinn giggled again, the sketches were quick and rough but she had to marvel at the likeness in Santana's drawings. Santana had always been brilliantly creative and talented artistically. She would never let on, for fear of being labelled an art-freak, but she probably had more artistic talent in her little finger than the rest of the school had combined. Even Rachel Berry had commented on how skilfully drawn the pornographic pictures of her scrawled all over the bathroom walls were, although she didn't know who had drawn them. Another sheet of paper fluttered in front of her face. This one was of Mercedes, mid power wail. She smiled at the page then over at her friends who were back to drawing.

"These are fantastic Santana," Quinn said quietly, watching Natasha's face for any sign that she might wake. Santana shrugged and continued whatever she was drawing now. "I must say I'm impressed that you drew Berry with her clothes on this time." Santana glared.

"Britt made me. She wants to hang them up in here and she wasn't sure that Tash would appreciate naked Berry pictures, given that she actually likes the dwarf," Santana mumbled as she drew. Half an hour later and Santana had drawn most of Glee Club, Brittany had managed to get some tacks from one of the nurses and was attaching Santana's drawings to the corkboard that was in the room for patients to put cards etc on and Quinn was lost in thought, her mind miles away. She didn't realise that she was quietly reciting the Lord's Prayer until a soft, sleepy, slightly garbled voice recited the last lines along with her.

"And lead us not into temptation but deliver us from evil, Amen," Natasha finished softly, smiling at Quinn. "Oh…," Natasha said, in that same quiet rasp as she saw the pictures Brittany had finished putting up. She glanced at Santana who was finishing off her last drawing, this one of Kurt in the midst of some particularly flamboyant gesturing. "Santana, those are awesome," her voice turned from a rasp to a croak at the end and Santana put the picture down, picking up the glass of water and straw from the table beside her. She wordlessly pressed the straw to Natasha's lips and the girl greedily sucked the water down, until the cup was empty. "Good," she sighed contentedly. Her eyes darted back to the board seeing Quinn with her eyes closed and a peaceful smile on her face, Santana and Brittany with pinkies linked, examining their nails, Puck leering at something, Sam playing guitar, Lauren looking bored, Tina and Mike cuddled up together and Artie pulling a wheelie in his chair.

"San drew them to cheer me up," Brittany told her. Her eyes were red and swollen from all of the crying she had done in the last hour but she was happier.

"And to give you something to look at," Santana said, her head down in embarrassment.

"I love them. And now I know who drew the naked Rachel Berrys in the bathroom at school," Natasha giggled a little before groaning in pain. "Quinn could you hit the button? Please?" Quinn hit the nurse button.

"Damn straight I did those drawings," Santana muttered.

"You're talented. Even if those pictures were mean and…naked," Natasha told her. "Hey," she said, suddenly noticing something as Santana went back to her drawing. "You're a leftie too." Santana nodded before handing her now finished Kurt sketch to Brittany to hang up.

"You beeped Natasha?" a nurse said from the doorway.

"I'm getting pretty sore," Natasha admitted, Quinn noticed that she seemed to have a little trouble opening her mouth and figured that must be from them wiring her jaw.

"You're due for a top up on your meds," the nurse said, looking at her chart. "And I'm sorry but I think it's time your friends left and let you rest," the nurse said gently, shooting apologetic looks at the three girls.

"That's ok. It is time we left," Quinn told the nurse. She stood, studying Natasha a moment before leaning in and kissing her forehead. "We'll come back tomorrow after school," she told her, finally releasing her hand.

"Ok," Natasha said sadly. Brittany came over next, following Quinn's lead and kissing an uninjured patch of Natasha's forehead, stroking her hair back out of her face. Brittany's bottom lip started to tremble and Natasha lifted her hand slowly to rest in on the blonde's cheek, stroking over her cheekbone with her thumb. "I'll be ok Britt," she said, giving the girl a small reassuring smile, trying and succeeding in holding off the wince at the pain smiling caused. "Come see me tomorrow and you can tell me all the gossip from school ok?"

"Ok," Brittany replied tearfully. She stepped away, seizing Quinn's hand and clinging on tightly. Santana moved up to the bed next. She took Natasha's hand and squeezed gently Natasha could see the Latina struggling to find words.

"I'm sorry this happened to you," she settled for saying. "I hope you feel better soon," she finished lamely. She pressed the briefest kiss to the girl's knuckles before darting out of the room, with Brittany and Quinn close behind.

Glee!

While the girls were off visiting Natasha, Mr Schue had the unpleasant task of filling the rest of the Glee Club in on what had happened. He had had a call from Genevieve that morning telling him that Natasha wanted him to tell them that Cameron had done it. He arrived early and paced anxiously as the kids started to arrive. Once they were all there, including Emma Pillsbury, he opened his mouth to speak but as usual Rachel beat him to it.

"Where are the others? They should be here by now! It's extremely rude to keep us all waiting and cut into our rehearsal time! We really do need to start planning our setlist for Regionals-."

"Rachel stop," Mr Schue cut in. "I need you to sit down." He watched as the kids looked at each other, wondering what was going on.

"Mr Schue is something wrong?" Mercedes asked, eyeing Ms Pillsbury. "Did something happen to someone?" her panicky voice made panic begin to rise in the others.

"Yes," Mr Schue told them. "But you all need to stay calm and listen to me ok?" he said as reassuringly as he could. He received nods and took a deep breath. "On Saturday night Brittany, Santana and Quinn received a frantic phone call from Natasha's little sister saying that she, her mother and Natasha had been hurt by someone. The girls called Sue and myself and we met up at Natasha's house. It was pretty bad," Mr Schue visibly cringed as the memories flooded back. "Jemimah had a broken arm, Mrs Isaacs had a very badly broken arm and a broken nose. But Natasha," his voice waivered a little, causing more alarm to the kids. "Natasha was a mess. We took her to the hospital and her mother was able to tell us, and the police that her son, Natasha's older brother, had attacked them with a baseball bat because Natasha took Jemimah to the park," he told them.

"What the fuck?" Puck roared angrily.

"Is she ok? Is she going to die?" Rachel asked hysterically.

"No!," Mr Schue told her. "No, no, no. She's got a lot of injuries but she's going to be ok."

"What kind of injuries?" Puck demanded. Mr Schue tool a deep breath, this was the part he was really dreading.

"He hit her in the face, the arm and the leg and they think he kicked her a few times in the ribs. She had a broken jaw, fractured eye socket, broken cheek, badly broken and dislocated elbow, dislocated shoulder, broken forearm, dislocated kneecap, cartilage damage to her knee and broken thighbone," he told them in as gentle a voice as he could. He wanted to be straight up but he knew this was a lot for them to take in.

"Oh god," Rachel gasped.

"Did they catch the motherfucker?" Puck asked. "Because if they haven't I'm going to find him and fucking kill him myself!" Puck's blood was boiling, he had a mom and a sister and he couldn't imagine ever being violent toward them. Even when his Mom was being a total grade-A bitch he would never even entertain the idea of hitting her. This douche had beaten his sister to a pulp with a bat. He deserved a fucking beat down.

"Not yet, but Puck he's going to pay for this," Mr Schue said gently, walking over to put a hand on the angry teenager's shoulder. "Natasha was in surgery most of yesterday and they've patched her up. But it's going to be a long, hard road to recovery for her. So we need to be ready to support her. She is really going to need it these next few months," Mr Schue told them. "Her mom said she's sore today but doing pretty well-," Mr Schue noticed multiple sets of eyes dart to the door and turned to see Quinn, Santana and Brittany walking in.

"She is doing ok right now. She's really tired and really sore and I don't think that it's really hit her yet," Quinn swallowed hard. "What happened." Brittany burst into tears again and Santana pulled her close for a hug.

"Did she talk to you? Is she awake?" Rachel asked.

"She talked a bit. I asked her how she was and she told me she was enjoying her drugs," Quinn smiled a little.

"Fighter," Puck grinned.

"Yeah she is," Quinn nodded.

"We're not going to rehearse today. I was hoping that we could just hang in here and talk about what happened. But you're free to leave if you want to," Mr Schue told them. "If anyone wants to talk to Ms Pillsbury then they're welcome to." At that they all began to talk amongst themselves. Puck strode over and wrapped his big arms around both Santana and Brittany hugging them tightly. Finn was making a beeline for Quinn but suddenly got shoved out of the way and Quinn found herself wrapped in Rachel's arms.

"I'm so sorry Quinn. That must have been so awful to see. Are you ok?" Rachel asked, and then winced. "Stupid question, of course you're not ok," she rambled. Quinn stood stiffly for a moment then just relaxed and let Rachel's incessant rambling wash over her. It was almost soothing. She saw a couple of the others give her weird looks but she didn't care right now. Comfort was comfort even when it was coming from Rachel Berry. Brittany had finally let go of Santana and was sitting on Artie's lap, as he talked to her soothingly. The thing that seemed to be freaking the other club members out more than Rachel hugging Quinn was Santana. The usually fiery Latina was tucked quietly under Puck's arm, curling into his side slightly. Lauren Zizes, who would normally hand Santana's ass to her for cuddling her boy toy like that, was awkwardly patting the Latina's arm. Santana was clearly fighting tears, and slowly but surely losing the battle as more and more escaped silently down her cheeks. Finn tapped Rachel on the shoulder then and the small girl reluctantly let Quinn go and stepped away so that Finn could talk to her. She walked unsteadily to her seat and sat down, her stomach lurched and churned and suddenly she felt nauseous. She took off for the bathroom and spent the next ten minutes dry heaving over the toilet. When her stomach finally settled again she walked out, only to find Santana gripping the edge of the sink as tears poured silently down her cheeks.

"S…Santana," Rachel stuttered cautiously, approaching the other girl. Santana opened her mouth as if to speak but all that came out was a small sob. Rachel very slowly inched closer, lifting a hand and resting it on Santana's back. When the girl didn't hit her or scream at her she got braver, sliding her arm around the girl's waist, her hand coming up to loosen Santana's grip on the sink. She continued moving slowly, turning the taller girl and standing on tiptoes to embrace her gently. Santana didn't hug back, she just stood stock still, crying silently as Rachel hugged her gently, rubbing her back to soothe her. Soon she managed to get control over herself again and pulled back slowly. Her eyes met Rachel's own puffy, wet eyes and she saw the silent promise in them that Rachel wouldn't tell anyone about this. She squeezed the other girl's wrist before wiping her eyes and walking out of the bathroom, not really giving a shit that she was a total mess. She figured that she was allowed to be right now. Rachel waited a few minutes before following her out. Back in the choir room, Santana was promptly tucked back under Puck's arm securely. Brittany was already tucked under the other one. Quinn was now wrapped up in Mercedes arms, the dark skinned girl crying softly, while Quinn just stood tiredly, her head resting on Mercedes shoulder. Mr Schue looked around at his dazed class and swallowed hard. It broke his heart to see them all so battered and shaken by the god awful turn of events. At the same time though it warmed him to see that when they needed to, they could put all of the drama and crap aside and be there for each other and they sure as hell needed each other right now.

Glee!

The next one will really be getting into the fallout for Natasha and will they or wont they be able to catch Cameron Isaacs?

As always thanks for reading and for the feedback, it is much appreciated. Also an apology for how long this took to get up. I have so much going on at work right now (I work at a preschool in Christchurch, New Zealand and we have another preschool combined with ours right now because they lost their building in the earthquake in Feb.) that I've been falling asleep at 7.30pm, which doesn't really leave much time for writing. I hope to get the next chapter up a bit quicker but I'm not making any promises!


	14. Chapter 13

Appearances

**A/N:** Natasha gets an unexpected visitor, Quinn has a confrontation and where the hell is Cameron Isaacs? Sorry this chapter jumps around a bit and comes across a little rushed because of it…

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Glee…

Glee!

Chapter Thirteen:

Natasha lay in her hospital bed, trying to will her eyes to open again. Her eyelids felt like someone had tied weights to them. They just didn't want to open. Her body was swimming in painkillers and it made her feel vaguely like she was underwater. She finally managed to open her eyes a crack, light flooding in. She wondered why she felt like this. She had been groggy before but this was something else entirely.

"Hi, baby," she heard her Mom's voice. She tried to force her voice to work.

"Mom?" it came out as a raw croak. A straw was pressed to her lips and she sucked, the cool water flowing down her throat woke her a little. "Mom?" more clearly this time.

"I'm here baby," her Mom replied. "You were in a lot of pain around midnight so they gave you extra meds." So that was why it was so much harder to wake up this morning…Natasha managed to force her eyes open the rest of the way, blinking as the harsh hospital lights flooded in.

"Oh," she managed to respond.

"Baby, someone is here to see you," Genevieve said, severing eye contact with her daughter. She stood and walked to the door nodding to someone outside. Natasha tried to crane her neck to see who it, but it hurt and accomplished nothing so she gave it up. Her mom walked in followed by the last person Natasha had expected to see.

"Dad?" she rasped incredulously.

"Hi beautiful," Greg Isaac's said softly. Natasha looked at him, tears pooling in her eyes, a lump rising in her throat. She tried to swallow it but she couldn't.

"Daddy," she whispered brokenly, lifting her good arm, reaching for him. All of the anger she had felt at him for leaving her faded for the time being, she would deal with that later. For now she was just so happy to see him. He stepped forward, taking her hand. She tried desperately to pull him closer to her, only managing a few weak tugs at his hand. Greg leaned down carefully, resting his forehead against hers, cradling her face with his free hand. Natasha pulled her hand from his and, with some effort, managed to lift her good arm to wrap around his neck. Greg shifted his head so that it rested next to Natasha's on the pillow, his lips next to her ear.

"I'm so sorry Natasha. I'm so fucking sorry. I can't believe what he's done to you. I should have been there. I should have stopped this. I should have ended this so long ago," his voice broke and Natasha sobbed harder. "I love you so much. I missed you so badly…" Greg's voice hitched and he broke off into an uneven chant of 'I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry' over and over and over. Natasha had no words and no idea how long they stayed that way but it was a long time. She vaguely wondered if her Dad's back was hurting. Then something else occurred to her, her still groggy mind seizing on it hard.

"Dad?" she asked. He pulled back, wiping at his eyes.

"Yeah baby?" he asked, his voice even in spite of his tears.

"Is Elijah here?" she asked, her voice raspier again now, from crying. Her dad picked up her water, holding the straw to her lips before answering.

"Yeah. He's out there with your Mom," he told her carefully.

"I want to see him," she said immediately. "I want to see him Dad," she pleaded. "Please?"

"I'll get him," Greg placed the cup back on the table and left the room. He came back in a few minutes later, with the slightly sleepy looking baby in his arms. Natasha drank him in, he was beautiful. He had the same tan skin that she and Jemimah had, inherited from their Puerto Rican Dad, but he had also inherited their Dad's chocolate brown eyes, rather than their grandmother's startling green. He had tufty brown hair and he was watching Natasha curiously. As her Dad carried him closer the baby beamed at her. Natasha had been waiting for this moment since her parents had told her that Genevieve was pregnant. It had killed her when her Dad and the baby had disappeared without even giving her the chance to say hello let alone goodbye. She smiled carefully back as Greg sat the baby on the bed under Natasha's good arm at her hip level.

"Hi Elijah," she said softly. The baby gurgled and grinned, drooling on the bed in the process. He flapped his little arms and Natasha reached out, catching a little hand in hers. Elijah grasped her finger in his, then grabbed her palm with his other little hand and tried to stick her fingers in his mouth. "Uh uh," Natasha pulled her hand back a little. The baby frowned, put out at being denied. Natasha laughed gently and Elijah laughed back at her, revealing one little white tooth at the bottom of his mouth.

"He thinks people laughing are hilarious," Greg told her, smiling. Elijah strained forward, reaching for Natasha's face. Greg shuffled him forward a little. He promptly grabbed a handful of Natasha's hair, pulling hard.

"OW! That's attached little man," Natasha frowned, reaching up awkwardly to pry the small hand out of her hair. She pulled it to her mouth and kissed it gently. The baby gurgled happily and Natasha wrapped her arm around his back, stroking gently up and down. It was the closest to a cuddle she could give him right now and her heart ached. She just wanted to hold her baby brother.

"Isn't he cool Tashie?" Jemimah bounded in then and Greg barely managed to catch the little girl with the arm that wasn't resting on the baby before she launched herself onto her injured sister.

"Slow down kiddo, your sisters not quite up for that yet," Greg told her lightly.

"Oh yeah, sorry Tash," Jemimah said sheepishly.

"S'ok Jem. Just try not to forget when there's no one to catch you," Natasha said gently.

"Yeah ok. But isn't he cool?" Jemimah's mind went back to her previous statement as she reached up to pet the baby's head.

"He's awesome," Natasha replied, smiling slightly at the happy little guy who was currently focussed on gently grabbing at the skin on her arm with both hands. "He's perfect," she whispered, stroking his chubby cheek.

Glee!

That night while Natasha was still marvelling over her baby brother in the hospital, Quinn paced anxiously in her living room, waiting. She was going to do this damn it. She was going to talk to her mother while the woman was sober and the only time she would get her sober was if she intercepted her as soon as she got home from work, before she opened the bottle. She had it all planned out in her head what she would say. She had been practising it all day at school, over and over in her head. It was perfect. Rational and heartfelt without being overly emotional…that in itself should have served as a warning.

"Quinnie?" Judy called out as she let herself in the front door.

"Hi Mom," Quinn called back. Taking a deep breath Quinn walked into the kitchen. "Mom I want to talk to you," she blurted in a rush.

"Sure honey," Judy frowned. She walked to the fridge, reaching in for her wine bottle.

"Damn it Mom!" Quinn shrieked, her anger bursting from the neat little compartment she had packed it away into. "Put the Goddamn wine away for five minutes! I want to talk to you sober for once!"

"Quinn Celeste Fabray! Do not take the Lord's name in vain!" Judy shrieked back. She pulled out a glass. Quinn stalked over, ripping the bottle from her mother's hand and tipping it down the sink. "Quinn!" her mother yelled angrily. Quinn's carefully prepared speech went straight out the window as her fury took over.

"Don't 'Quinn' me, Mom! You have no right! You suck! You suck Mom!" Quinn screamed, tears running down her cheeks.

"What is going on?" Judy asked, completely stunned by Quinn's display of emotion.

"What's going on? What's going on? Fuck, Mom, I don't know! One of my friends is in the hospital beaten nearly to death by her own brother. I ended up sedated and in the hospital myself because I had a massive panic attack. My friend's Moms raced to support them but my own Mom was too fucking drunk to care. Coach Sylvester had to drag your hung-over ass out of bed and to the hospital so that they could discharge me and did you stay with me? Did you support me through one of the most traumatic things I have ever been through? No! You took a fucking cab home to sleep it off! You let me down! You are so absorbed in your own crap that when I needed my Mom, you let me down. Again! You suck," Quinn stopped, sucking in hitching, painful breaths as she tried to reign in her anger. "You suck." Quinn repeated, softer now. "You suck and I think I hate you." Quinn gripped the table as sobs wracked her body at her last statement. She hadn't meant that, but her anger had made her run her mouth. She saw movement through her tears and then an arm wrapped around her and she was being led somewhere, her eyes so blurred from tears that she couldn't see where. Then she was in her Mom's lap, cradled in her arms like a small child. She could feel her Mom's chest hitching as she sobbed too.

It was all Judy could think to do, just pull her distraught youngest daughter into the living room to the couch and just cradle her in her arms. She began sobbing herself as Quinn's words sank in and the truth along with them. She held her tightly, reaching up a hand to stroke her blonde curls, her cheeks, her hands, trying desperately to comfort her. Quinn turned in her arms, wrapping her arms around her neck, burying her face into her shoulder and Judy adjusted her arms to hold her tightly and stroke her hair. It took a long time but eventually Quinn's sobs quieted to sniffles and she relaxed a little in Judy's arms. Judy cleared her throat, hoarse from crying.

"Quinnie I am so sorry," she began. "I just…I'm so sorry." She couldn't figure out where to start, there were so many things that she wanted to apologise for. Quinn climbed out of her lap, moving to the end of the couch, as far away from her mother as she could get.

"Sorry doesn't mean shit, Mom," she said evenly.

"Quinn, please stop swearing and listen to me," Judy said firmly.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck, shit," Quinn spat petulantly, folding her arms like a child, her anger flaring that after everything her mother fixated on her language of all things.

"Ok, fine, keep swearing and listen to me then," Judy took a deep breath, she hated swearing but she realised that now just wasn't the time. "Quinn you're right. I suck," Judy cringed at the slang. Quinn looked up in surprise at hearing it. "I'm probably the worst mother in the world. I have let you down so many times. I never stuck up for you when your father kicked you out, I never questioned it. I let him do it. Then after I left him I dragged you home and expected everything to go back to how it was. And it did. I went back to leaving you to yourself, drinking myself into numbness every night, expecting you to look out for yourself and to be ok with it all. Then this. This. I don't even know what to do with this. I've been so caught up in myself for so long that I've forgotten how to just be there for you. I should have been there, Quinn. I should have taken care of you. You must have been so scared, to find your friend like that. How is she doing?" Judy asked hesitantly.

"She has a lot of broken bones. She's going to be ok," Quinn said quietly. Surprised at her mother's openness.

"How are you doing Quinnie?" she asked.

"Horrible," Quinn's lip trembled and tears began cascading down her cheeks again. "Horrible. I can't make that image go away. We found her on her floor in a pool of her own blood. I can't get that out of my head. And I'm mad. I'm mad at you. I'm mad that I had to break down in Mrs Pierce's arms instead of yours when I was upset. You should have been there Mom. Even Louisa was there. She's totally oblivious to Santana ninety percent of the time, hence the extreme behaviour, but at least she's there when Santana needs her the most. You should have been there," Quinn rambled honestly.

"I know," Quinn had never seen her Mom look so ashamed. Judy slowly shifted closer to Quinn. Quinn sat still, not moving a muscle. "I'm sorry Quinn. I'll try harder. I can't promise to be perfect but I can promise that I'll try harder."

"You don't have to be perfect Mom. You just have to be there," Quinn told her. She leaned into her mother when she wrapped her arms around her again, head on her shoulder. She was quiet for a moment. "I don't hate you. I just don't like you very much right now," she admitted.

"I think that's fair," Judy replied.

"I'm sorry…about the swearing," Quinn blushed. "That was childish to the extreme."

"I think you're spending too much time around Santana," Judy replied evenly. "I swear there were times when the three of you were growing up that I actually considered using a gag to stop the flow of filth that spewed from that child's mouth. Good Lord," Quinn pulled back to stare at her mother, bursting out laughing when she saw the slight smile and the twinkle in her eye. She hadn't seen that in so long. Judy laughed too.

"She had a pretty impressive vocabulary for a six year old didn't she?" Quinn laughed.

"I had never heard the likes of it before and I don't think I have since or ever will again," Judy smiled. She hugged Quinn tighter and kissed her forehead. Quinn tucked her head against her shoulder and sighed somewhat contentedly. She internally told herself not to get her hopes up too high but she couldn't help feeling kind of good right now.

"I'm going to take a shower. I'm kind of a mess," Quinn was hesitant to break the moment but at the same time she needed some space to process what had just happened.

"Ok, sweetheart," Judy kissed her forehead again. Quinn stood and walked away, hesitating in the doorway.

"I'm still mad at you," she said, without looking at her mother.

"I know," Judy replied. She watched her daughter walk away. She stood in the doorway until she heard the bathroom door lock and the water come on before walking to the kitchen. She pulled out the phonebook and found what she was looking for. Judy Fabray took a deep breath before she punched in the number for the private alcohol counselling service.

Glee!

"San?" Brittany asked. They were stretched out side by side on Brittany's bed, fingers laced together between them.

"What?" Santana asked.

"Q told me you behave like you were raised by wolves to get attention because your Mom is oblivious. I don't know what that means," Brittany told her, rolling to face Santana.

"It means I'm going to punch Quinn in the head tomorrow," Santana growled viciously.

"Huh?" Brittany was staring at her like she had just asked her what the square root of a million was.

"It means that my Mom doesn't pay attention to me so I get in trouble and shit so that she will. But it's not true. Q is full of shit. That's why I'm going to punch her in the head," Santana replied, as calmly as she could manage, her fists clenching on the bed.

"Oh. I don't like it when you hit Quinn," Brittany said sadly, looking like Santana had just kicked a puppy. "And besides, I don't think she was trying to be mean." Brittany reached over to tickle the inside of Santana's wrist, the way she always did when she wanted something. Santana almost always gave in to that.

"Well why else would she say it?" Santana yanked her arm away, giving Brittany a sullen 'I know what you're trying to do' glare.

"I think she was talking about her Mom," Brittany frowned. Her hand shot out catching Santana's arm, yanking it back pointedly and resuming her gentle tickling.

"About her Mom?" Santana frowned, giving in to the tickling.

"Yeah. She said that even though your Mom is oblivious, even when you behave like you were raised by wolves to get her attention, that at least she's there and isn't drunk when you need her," Brittany parroted the words she had heard Quinn say earlier. "I didn't really understand. She was kind of all over the place."

"She's upset that her Mom didn't come to the hospital when ours did B," Santana explained, her voice had lost its angry edge now. "Quinn's Mom kinda sucks that way," she told the blonde.

"Oh!" Santana could almost see it click in Brittany's head. "Poor Quinn," her face fell as she processed the information a little more.

"Yeah. She's right about my mom too. She's oblivious most of the time but at least I know that she cares," Santana mused, lying back down her head tilting to rest against Brittany's shoulder, pulling her hand out of Brittany's grasp slightly to link their fingers again.

"I wish that you guys could have my Mom. My Mom is awesome," Brittany told her, smiling happily.

"Your Mom is totally awesome," Santana agreed, her eyes beginning to get heavy.

"Are you really going to punch Q tomorrow?" Brittany asked with a yawn.

"Maybe not this time," Santana replied. Brittany smiled to herself, wrist tickling always worked…

Glee!

Natasha was propped up in bed staring at the door. Something was going down. Something big. When she had woken up this morning there were four cops outside her door. A nurse had said that there were cops outside her Mom and Jemimah's door too and that her Dad and Elijah had been told to stay in there with them. She kept calling out to them but none of them would give her an answer. She felt the anxiety coiling up inside her, making her feel edgy. What if he was here? What if he was sneaking around in the hospital somewhere, looking for her? Natasha started to hyperventilate a little bit. She closed her eyes and took a few deep breaths. When she opened her eyes they fell on the cork board full of Santana's drawings of the Glee Club. She looked at each picture in turn, Rachel belting out a note with her face all scrunched and intense, Mercedes in mid wail, Kurt, who Natasha didn't really know that well, gesturing flamboyantly, Quinn in a rare peaceful moment, without that weary look in her eyes, her eyes traced Santana and Brittany's linked pinkies then dropped to Puck's leering face. Natasha's anxiety faded as she stared at them all and she had the sudden realisation that she missed them, their teasing and bickering. She even missed Mr Shue's terrible rapping. She wondered if they would all come and visit her in the hospital. She wanted to ask Brittany or Quinn if they would ask them for her. She was busy wondering what they were up to when a bunch of cops ushered her Mom, Dad and Jemimah and Elijah into her room. She frowned, turning to look at them all.

"What's going on?" Natasha asked.

"We don't know baby," Genevieve replied. She glared at the cops.

"I'm sorry ma'am but we can't tell you anything until our Captain gets here," One officer said apologetically. Genevieve scoffed and rolled her eyes.

"Gen," Greg said gently, squeezing her arm. He followed Natasha's eyes back to the pictures on the board, she was trying to calm herself again. "I noticed those earlier. Who drew them?" he asked.

"My friend Santana," Natasha replied. "You see the one of the two girls with their pinkies linked? She's the dark haired one," she pointed out.

"She's a brilliant sketch artist," Greg replied. "Who are the others?"

"The rest of the Glee Club. I'm in Glee Club now," Natasha told him.

"Singing and dancing?" her dad asked, confused at the term.

"Yeah," Natasha replied.

"That's good. You were always great at singing and dancing," Greg smiled.

"I didn't want to join. I got in four fist fights with Santana in a week. They made me join…but now I kind of love it," Natasha said shyly.

"Fist fights Tash? I thought she was your friend?" Greg asked, exasperated and confused.

"She comes on a little strong at first," Natasha said fondly. It seemed like a million years ago that she and Santana had been enemies.

"Right," Greg drew the word out, shaking his head a little bit in disbelief.

"I'm sorry to interrupt," a deep voice spoke from the door. "I'm Captain Adamson. I'd like to talk to you if that's ok."

"Ok," Genevieve said, taking in the man's grim face.

"Maybe the younger ones can play with Officer Anderson here for a bit," the man gestured to a kind faced female officer. Genevieve reluctantly handed the baby over and Jemimah shyly too her hand and allowed herself to be led away. Captain Adamson glanced at Natasha.

"Whatever you have to say, Natasha can hear it," Genevieve said staunchly.

"That's your choice ma'am," The man stepped further into the room, pulling one of the seats to the foot end of Natasha's bed, sitting down on it. "I'm sure you're all wondering about the presence of the police in the hospital tonight. We have been tracking your son, brother," he looked at Natasha who cringed. "So far he had managed to avoid us quite spectacularly. There were three high speed chases and the little bastard managed to get away from us every time. We put officers in a few places we suspected that he might go. Kept an eye on things. Last night we got a phone call from a source of a sighting near your residence, Mr Isaacs, and we headed out there to check it out. We arrived to find the house a mess, turned upside down from one end to the other," The officer cleared his throat. "We checked the answering machine which was the only thing still sitting there seemingly untouched. It still had the message we left for you Mr Isaacs, to tell you that your wife and daughters were here-."

"Fuck me! That was fucking stupid!" Greg cursed at his own stupidity.

"Maybe, maybe not. We figured he would come here so we got SWAT set up here, we wanted to be prepared for anything, we waited for a long time. About three hours ago it occurred to us that the sneaky bastard might get in here somehow so we sent officers up here to guard the rooms. About an hour ago he finally showed. He tried to get in the front doors with flowers and balloons and his best caring face on. When we tried to stop him he dropped it all and pulled a gun. We tried to reason with him, tried to get him to hand over the gun. We almost had him, and then he opened fire on us. He took down two officers; there were innocent people all around. We were left with no choice. I'm sorry Mr and Mrs Isaacs, but we were forced to take him down. Your son was killed in the fire fight," Adamson said as gently as he could. Genevieve began sobbing, Greg held her silently, tears running down his cheeks. Natasha could only try desperately to figure out how she was supposed to react to this cop informing that her abusive bastard brother was dead, by a hail of police gunfire…

Glee!

How was that? Did I get ya? Let me know what you think. I actually had other plans for Cameron but when I set to write this was what came out. I hope you all liked it.


	15. Chapter 14

Appearances

**A/N:** Natasha and her family deal with her brother's death, the glee club visit Natasha... **Quite a few four letter f words in the first part of this one…Not sure if I should put the rating up for that..?**

Sorry, sorry, sorry for the delay in getting this one up! Management decided last week to carry out an internal audit at my work next week so we've all been really busy trying to make sure everything was in place for that, then on Tuesday (of this week!) they told us it had been brought forward to today so the last few days have been a frantic and stressful blur and my muse ran and hid so I've been chipping away at this one for about a week now, trying desperately with precious little luck to get another chapter up for you lovely readers. Thanks for your patience! The audit went well, the stress has settled, the muse has come crawling back with her tail between her legs and I managed to write a chapter. Yay me!

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Glee…

Glee!

Chapter Fourteen:

Natasha lay in stunned silence as her Dad tried to comfort her Mom beside her. Captain Adamson had left to let them process what he had just told them. Genevieve was sobbing helplessly while Greg held her gently, his face a stony mask and his eyes far away. Natasha had no idea what she was meant to feel. Somewhere deep inside of her there was a long buried part of her that was grieving for her brother, the boy who had lovingly stuck a whole box of plasters on her scraped knees when she fell off her bike when she was five, the boy who, when she was six, had gotten grounded for a week for feeding her eight cookies right before dinner when their mom wasn't looking. But that part of her had been grieving for that boy for a long time, long before all of this. Now she couldn't see that boy anymore without seeing the monster he had become. And Natasha couldn't grieve for that. She glanced over at her Mom's heartbroken face and anger boiled up inside her. She reached to the table with her good hand and grabbed her water cup, hurling it across the room as hard as her tired muscles would let her. It hit the wall with a thud, bouncing off and skittering across the floor. Natasha looked around for something else to throw but her Dad yanked the table away from her before she could. He stood up, catching her flailing arm and gently but firmly pressed it down to the bed beside her.

"Natasha please don't, honey, you'll hurt yourself," he said gently. Natasha's seething anger exploded at that simple request.

"Fuck you Greg!" she screamed as best she could, pain ripping through her tender jaw at the action. "Who the fuck are you to protect me from myself when you ran away and left me with him?" Natasha whipped her head to glare at her still sobbing mother. "Stop fucking crying Mom!" she yelled before whipping back to her father. "You don't get to tell me what to do anymore! You forfeited that right when you pissed off and made your own nice new life and left the three of us with him!"

"Honey we had to get Elijah away from there-," Greg began, guilt and hurt rising in his eyes. He had been waiting for this since he had gotten back.

"I'm not mad at you for protecting Eli, Dad! Truthfully I'm not actually all that mad at you for not protecting me. I'm mostly mad at you for not taking Jem! She's just a little girl and now her innocence is just gone! No little girl should have to spend every minute she's out of the house worrying that we won't get home in time and that he'll be mad! She had to watch her brother beat her mother and sister half to death with a baseball bat! She should never have seen that and now she will never, ever be able to un-see it! And I blame you! I blame you!" Natasha screamed, tears cascading down her cheeks now, half from her emotions and half from the pain ripping through the side of her face. "Get out of my room," she snarled, her fury ebbing. When neither of her parents moved her anger flared. "Get out of my fucking room! Both of you just get out!" she screamed. Greg pulled Genevieve to her feet and began leading her from their daughter's room. As they opened the door a sob escaped Genevieve again. "For fuck's sake stop crying Mom!" Natasha yelled. "This is the best thing that ever happened to us!" she yelled. As her parents closed the door Natasha dropped her head back on the pillows, her breath coming out in harsh sobs. Her bruised ribs were sending fiery pain up one side of her body, she had jolted her injured arm and that, along with her jaw, was throbbing like a bitch. She was still breathing hard when the door opened and Lorraine, her nurse came in.

"Your parents think we need to sedate you," she stated, picking up the girl's chart.

"No!" Natasha shook her head, her eyes widening fearfully.

"Relax baby, I'm not going to sedate you for being upset," the pretty, dark skinned woman told her with a small smile. She moved to perch on the edge of the bed, picking up Natasha's left hand, rubbing gently around her IV with her thumb. Natasha's lip trembled and her eyes filled with tears.

"Thank you," she whispered.

"Would you like me to call your friends?" Lorraine asked gently, grabbing a tissue and dabbing gently at the tears on Natasha's cheeks. Natasha sniffled and shook her head.

"They're coming over after school anyway," she whispered sadly. She absently reached up to rub gently at her throbbing jaw.

"How about some pain meds then? That jaw has to hurt after all of that yelling," Lorraine smiled again.

"Please," Natasha managed a small smile back.

Glee!

"Knock, knock," Quinn said softly as she, Santana and Brittany walked into Natasha's hospital room.

"Hey," Natasha smiled lazily at them. She was in heaven. Lorraine had decided that the girl needed a little pampering and had brought in a bowl of warm water to wash her hair. She had her all propped on pillows, her head hanging over the bowl and was currently rinsing conditioner out of her long dark hair.

"Enjoying yourself there?" Santana asked, smirking.

"Oh yeah," Natasha sighed happily.

"Sorry to tell you I'm all done," Lorraine smiled, wrapping her hair up in a towel and removing the bowl. She helped her to settle back into the bed properly before she went to empty the bowl.

"Can I braid your hair?"Brittany asked excitedly.

"Sure," Natasha told her. "It might be a little awkward though," she admitted.

"That's ok, I'll figure it out," Brittany said happily. She eyed Natasha for a few moments before coming up with a plan. She gently propped a pillow under her arm and one behind her back so that she was sitting forward enough for Brittany to reach her hands under her head. "Is that ok?" she asked, perching next to her on her left side, a little concerned at the pained look on Natasha's face.

"Yeah," Natasha grunted. The pain, which had increased by her moving around, soon dulled back to its usual steady throb and she relaxed a bit as Brittany gently towelled as much water out of her hair as she could.

"Where's your Mom?" Quinn asked casually.

"I don't know," Natasha said sharply. "Probably crying somewhere with Dad," she added bitterly after a moment.

"Wait what?" Quinn shook her head, confused. "Your Dad is here? I'm confused."

"My Dad arrived yesterday. And the cops killed my brother this morning," Natasha said flatly.

"Oh my God, Natasha!" Quinn gasped in shock. Natasha's lip trembled but she tried to keep her face indifferent as Brittany began running the comb gently through her hair. Natasha saw Santana shoot a look at her and felt Brittany shrug beside her.

"What happened?" Santana asked. Natasha was quiet for a while; so long in fact that the others thought that she wasn't actually going to answer her. Then, as Brittany put down the comb and began running her fingers soothingly through her hair, Natasha spoke. She told them about her Dad arriving yesterday with the baby. About the cops that had been hanging around outside her door that morning and about Captain Adamson telling them that Cameron had opened fire on police and civilians, giving them no choice but to take him out.

"Mom wouldn't stop crying. Then I got mad and I yelled at both of them. They left and they haven't come back," Natasha's voice trembled.

"Oh my God. They just killed him?" Santana shook her head in disbelief.

"Yeah I guess," Natasha replied as Brittany began sectioning her hair. "But I think…" Natasha faltered, not sure if she wanted to voice the thought that had been plaguing her all day.

"You can tell us," Quinn seemingly read her mind.

"I think that once he saw them he knew he was screwed. He couldn't get in and he couldn't get away from them he was going to have to face the consequences. He never does that. When things get bad he runs away. When he couldn't run away…I think he fired pot-shots at them so that they'd shoot him…" Natasha finished, feeling stupid. It sounded ridiculous when she said it out loud.

"Suicide by cop?" Quinn asked. Natasha nodded, avoiding eye contact.

"I guess we'll never know though," Natasha replied. They were all silent a while, except for Brittany who was humming softly as she French braided Natasha's hair gently and fairly awkwardly. When she finished she realised she didn't have a tie to secure it. She looked over at Santana and Quinn, waving the unsecured end of the braid which she had pinched between her fingers. Quinn pulled a tie from her bag, handing it to the blonde.

"It'd make sense though," Brittany suddenly commented as she secured the braid.

"Huh?" Santana shook her head, not understanding.

"That suicide thing. If he always ran away so he didn't have to deal with the stuff that he did then that would be the easy way out wouldn't it?" she said absently, admiring the perfectly neat French braid she had somehow managed to create. Natasha turned her head to look at the blonde, a little shocked. Then her face darkened.

"I don't want to talk about it," she mumbled. Brittany gently eased the pillow from behind her and helped her to settle back against the bed.

"Ok," Quinn said quickly. "Did you get to see the baby?" it was a gamble but Quinn had a feeling it would be a happier topic. Natasha shot her a smile, nodding slightly.

"He's so perfect," she said dreamily. "I really want to show him to you but I don't really want to see my parents," she frowned.

"I'll go get him!" Brittany leaped up excitedly. "I love babies, they're better than ducks and rainbows. They're better than a duck-rainbow!" Natasha shook her head in disbelief as Brittany bounced out of the room, not waiting for an answer. Santana laughed at the look on Natasha's face.

"You gotta love her," she said ruefully. "One minute she's wise beyond her years and the next she's like a child."

"She's intriguingly baffling," Natasha replied, shaking her head a little.

"The Glee Club is headed this way. They'll probably be here shortly. They gave us a head start but they're all dying to see you," Quinn told her. Natasha's face lit up and she smiled, the torment in her eyes fading briefly.

"I was going to ask you to tell them to come and see me," Natasha told them. "I miss them."

"Ew," Santana said, rolling her eyes. The corners of her lips twitched up though and Natasha smirked.

"Oh get over yourself and admit that you like them," she ribbed the other girl.

"Never," Santana shot back. Brittany chose that moment to walk back in, sleeping baby in her arms.

"He's asleep," she told them, unnecessarily. "Your parents are telling Jemimah about Cameron," she told Natasha, who flinched at the name. Brittany, oblivious to the reaction, walked up to the bed and placed the blanket swaddled baby in Natasha's good arm, tucking him against her side in something of a cradle hold, and tucking his soft blanket around him tighter. Quinn jumped up and lifted the railing on that side of the bed in case he rolled or something.

"Thanks," Natasha stared wordlessly at the bundle in her arm until Santana spoke.

"Ugh stop making googly eyes at the baby," she said in her bitchiest voice. "Wanna know what I did today?" Natasha looked up in time to see Santana's best devious face staring back at her; chin tilted down, dark brown eyes rolled up to look at her, smirk firmly in place on her lips.

"I'm not so sure I do," Natasha replied, warily. Santana ignored her.

"I drew a fairly graphic picture of Mr Schue and Miss Pillsbury doing it and stuck it on the dry erase board in the choir room," the Latina stated proudly, devious look still firmly on her face.

"Oh Lord," Natasha shook her head a little as she tried to erase the pictures her mind was creating. Santana now looked proud and devious.

"But first we photocopied it and printed a ton of copies using the Glee Club password and pinned it to every notice board in the school. You should have seen them running around trying to find them all," Brittany told Natasha proudly.

"We also mailed copies to their houses," Santana's smirk got even more obnoxious if that was even possible.

"I had nothing to do with this," Quinn announced holding up her hands. "It was pretty funny though," she grinned.

"I wish I could have seen that," it was the wrong thing to say because next thing the two girls were pulling out their phones and showing her the videos they had sneakily recorded on their phones. As the other three were distracted Quinn stared at the sleeping baby, her heart felt like it was shrivelling in her chest. He was just a few months younger than Beth. Quinn stood, moving forward slowly as her friends laughed at Miss Pillsbury freaking out on Santana's phone. Her fingers drifted out to touch the baby; his skin was soft beneath her fingertips, his breath warm where it hit her wrist as she stroked his forehead. Her fingertip brushed over his slightly parted little pink lips and he twitched, frowning in his sleep at the gentle touch. Quinn felt a lump in her throat and moved away, trying hard to contain it.

"Hey Warrior Princess! Up for some visitors?" a voice called out from the doorway. Puck leaned on the doorframe, lecherous look firmly in place, although the shock in his eyes at the sight of Natasha's injuries was evident.

"Hey," Natasha smiled. "Come in, save me from this lot," she inclined her head at the three girls. Puck entered the room followed by the others. Even Kurt was there in his Warblers uniform.

"Oh good Lord, tell me that isn't yours!" Kurt's voice rang out as Brittany moved and their eyes fell on the baby.

"My baby brother, Eli," Natasha frowned at them. "Don't wake him," she ordered. Everyone was quiet for a few minutes, all staring at the injured girl, trying to process the image in front of them. The swelling on her face had gone down dramatically, her eye was still swollen mostly shut and her cheek and jaw were a little puffy but nothing like they had been. The bruising was a hell of a lot worse though. Purple and red coloured almost the whole right side of her face. Natasha turned that side of her face against her pillow. "Stop looking at me!" she grumped.

"Sorry. It's kind of a lot for us to process. We brought you things!" Rachel told her. "Good Lord that baby is cute!" she frowned staring at the baby. She shook herself and placed a gift bag on the bed. "I'll just show you the stuff because clearly you aren't able to remove it from the bag yourself right now-"

"Jesus Berry, just do it already!" Santana interrupted, glaring at the girl. Rachel glared back and Santana growled slightly causing Rachel to let out a squeak of fear and hurriedly turn back to the bag.

"It's mostly candy, with some music," Rachel told her, pulling out various candy and Natasha's iPod which thrilled Natasha. She appreciated Brittany lending her her iPod but Brittany's taste in music was pretty different to hers. "Oh my God Noah! I told you not to put that in there!" Rachel shrieked when she shifted a block of chocolate and saw what was underneath. Puck grinned like an idiot from where he stood next to Natasha.

"Do I want to know?" Natasha asked, glaring at Puck.

"Probably not," Rachel replied, giving Puck the best death glare that she could summon up.

"Just show her," Puck grinned. Rachel made a sound of disgust as she gingerly hooked the item out of the bag with her little finger. Natasha snorted when she saw it, which made her face hurt and she cringed.

"Oh my God I had no idea you could get those in key rings," Natasha laughed softly as she stared at the bright blue miniature TruckNutz.

"Ow!" Puck yelped as Kurt whacked the back of his head with his palm.

"Noah those are revolting!" the smaller boy admonished. Puck rounded on him and he let out a squeak before he darted away, hiding behind Mercedes, who rolled her eyes and glared at Santana who had opened her mouth, a look of pure glee on her face at the raft of gay jokes that had probably just popped into her head. Santana glared back at Mercedes and if looks could kill the other girl would have been dead about ten times over, but she kept quiet.

"Hang them on the IV pole," Natasha pointed up at the pole in question and Puck grabbed the key ring, hanging them up there. "They are so gross," Natasha cackled gleefully. Rachel shook her head in disgust at the two of them.

"There is something wrong with the two of you," she stated in disgust. Puck and Natasha grinned at each other. "The rest of us put nice things in here," Rachel said pointedly, before she pulled out a headband with five little gold stars on it, and put it on the defenceless Natasha's head, beaming proudly. "Very pretty. That's from me of course," she said, still admiring it. There was a collection of various other trinkets from the other members of the club. A little coloured glass angel from Mercedes, which the girl refused to let Puck desecrate by hanging it next to his gift, a small fluffy stuffed bear from Kurt and Finn that Finn had embarrassedly admitted to picking out himself, there was a framed photo of the whole club dressed as Zombies including Natasha, that she had forgotten they had taken, from Tina and Mike, Tina had decorated the frame herself with little painted skeletons, and then the other club members had contributed various candy. Lauren made sure Natasha knew that the good stuff was from her.

"I think I love you," Natasha told the girl, eyeing the Cadbury eggs eagerly. "Thanks you guys," she smiled then winced.

"What's wrong?" Rachel asked quickly, her face turning worried.

"Broken jaw," Natasha told her frankly. "Pulls when I smile, or talk too much."

"Can you eat?" Rachel asked.

"Probably only through a straw right now," Puck told her, shrugging. When everyone looked at him he shrugged again. "I broke my jaw at that party two years ago remember?"

"Oh yeah," Santana snorted. "We were playing truth or dare and I dared him to nut punch the biggest guy on the wrestling team," she told them. "I thought he had more brains than to actually do it," she turned to look at him smugly. "I gave him too much credit." Puck flipped her off and Santana promptly returned the gesture.

"There's a lot of people in here," came a stern voice behind them. One of the nurses was standing in the doorway, hands on her hips, tapping her foot.

"Sorry. We're behaving though," Natasha said, her bruised face pleading. The nurse sighed.

"20 minutes. Then they have to start clearing out," she told them. She came in and took Natasha's vitals quickly and gave her a light top up of her meds. "Oh now that just isn't right!" the nurse suddenly spluttered, spotting the addition to Natasha's IV pole. It was met with muffled sniggers and a snort from Puck.

"It was a gift," Natasha said fondly.

"Charming," the nurse replied, recovering and unable to stop the small smile that broke out at the teenagers' antics. She marked Natasha's chart and left the room, only stopping to call out "20 minutes," over her shoulder.

Glee!

"Did they catch him?" Mercedes asked softly, breaking the long silence that had fallen on the room after the nurse had left.

"He turned up at the entrance here with a gun. He fired at police and some innocent bystanders. The cops shot back. He's dead," Natasha replied, her voice carefully devoid of emotion.

"I'm sorry," Mercedes said, moving to touch Natasha's shoulder. "I bet it's hard to know what to feel about that huh?" she asked tenderly. Natasha looked up at her, surprised.

"Yeah," she replied, tiredness seeping into her voice. "I really don't know what to do with it," she shrugged helplessly.

"Well if you want to talk just call me ok?" Mercedes smiled reassuringly. "Our numbers are all on a piece of paper in the bag," she told her.

"Thanks," Natasha smiled gratefully, the painkillers working to make the action less painful now.

"Aw look he's awake!" Brittany suddenly cooed, moving toward the bed. Natasha looked down into a pair of big brown eyes. Elijah grinned and cooed up at his sister eliciting a series of 'Aaaawww's from the females in the room. He wriggled to free his little arms from his blanket and he tensed his little stomach muscles, trying unsuccessfully to sit up. Puck picked him up and turned him around, sitting him under Natasha's arms like her Dad had done the previous day. Natasha sent him a grateful smile, noting but not commenting on the guarded look in his eyes.

"Hi Bubba, look at all of the people," she said to the baby who was looking around, wide eyed and bewildered at the crowd watching him. His eyes fell on Brittany who was closest and he gurgled, reaching out to her. She picked him up and he promptly grabbed her cheeks with both hands, leaning forward in her arms to put his forehead against hers his eyes right up close to hers. He held that pose a moment before he giggled and pulled back, trying to stuff a handful of blonde hair into his mouth. The conversation all but stopped as their attention turned to the baby who got passed around like a party favour until it was time for them all to leave. Natasha received various, careful hugs, touches and kisses goodbye, along with promises of future visits, as they filed out one by one. Tears welled in her eyes as she watched them go, not wanting them to leave and for reality to set back in.

"Q?" Natasha snapped out of her sad haze at the concern in Santana's voice. She looked over at Quinn who Tina had evidently thrust the baby at as she left. The blonde girl was holding the baby at arm's length, tears pooling in her eyes and her throat working convulsively as she tried desperately to hold in sobs. Elijah was squirming, reaching for her face and grabbing at her clothes, trying to get closer for a cuddle.

"T-take him, p-please," Quinn stuttered, her eyes begging Santana to just do it. Santana immediately reached out and took the baby, who gurgled and snuggled into her shoulder. Quinn backed quickly to the door. "J-just g-give me a m-minute," she said, her voice cracking.

"Ok," Santana nodded. Quinn was gone in seconds and Natasha looked at Santana and Brittany, confused. "Uh, Q had a baby last year. She gave her up," she explained briefly.

"Oh. I heard something about that but I didn't know if it was true and I never heard the whole story," Natasha replied. "I feel bad. Maybe you should take him back to Mom?" she suggested.

"No, if she didn't want him in here she would say so. This is Q trying to face it," Santana responded. "Although, I think you can have it back B," Santana wrinkled her nose and held out the child who let out an indignant squawk before cuddling into Brittany. "Ugh, how did it manage to drool into my bra?" Santana groaned in disgust, grabbing a paper towel from the dispenser to mop up the offending substance, glaring daggers at the baby's back as she did.

"Not like it's a small target," Natasha quipped, pointedly looking at the tops of Santana's breasts that were peeking out of her low cut top. Santana glared and flipped her off and Natasha just laughed.

"What's funny?" A small voice asked from the door. Quinn was back and a bit of a mess. Her cheeks were flushed, her eyes were red and puffy and she had the hiccups.

"Eli drooled in Santana's bra," Brittany informed her. "Then Natasha insulted Santana's boobs."

"I see," Quinn's eyes were fixed on the baby.

"Do you want Britt to take him back?" Natasha asked gently.

"No," Quinn shook her head. She took a deep breath. "I want to hold him." She stepped forward, holding out her arms, her eyes sad but determined. Brittany stood, turning the baby to face Quinn and held him out. Quinn took him, holding him at arm's length again, before slowing drawing him closer to her body until he was resting against her chest. Elijah gurgled and smiled, reaching out and touching Quinn's nose. It didn't take long for Quinn to warm up, and soon she was bouncing him in her lap as they talked about stuff that was going on at school. Quinn was quieter than usual, a sad reflective look in her eyes even as she smiled and talked to the baby. All too soon though it was time for them to leave. Santana and Brittany both went to take the baby back, Santana wanting to see Genevieve and Jem, leaving Quinn alone with Natasha.

"They told you?" Quinn asked.

"Not in detail," Natasha shrugged. "That must have been hard Quinn. It must be hard to look at him and wonder about your baby," she said softly.

"Yeah," Quinn said shakily.

"Come here," Natasha ordered softly. "On my good side." Quinn did and Natasha lifted her arm, pulling at Quinn until she bent down and let the other girl hug her gently. She felt lips press against her temple and pulled back slowly. Natasha let out a frustrated sigh. "I hate not being able to hug people properly!" she stated grumpily. Quinn smiled. "It'll get easier," she whispered. The double meaning in her words wasn't lost on either girl.

Glee!

"Is she ok?" Genevieve asked as she stroked a sleeping Jemimah's hair. The child was curled into her mother, her face blotchy and puffy as if she had cried herself to sleep. It made Santana's heart hurt to think that that was probably exactly what had happened.

"She's confused. She has no idea how she's supposed to feel about this. Right now I think she's just relieved that she doesn't have to be afraid of him anymore," Santana explained.

"Is she mad at us?" Greg asked as Santana handed him the baby.

"I don't think so. She said she got mad and yelled and I think you were probably just the easiest target to aim it at," Santana replied.

"Greg that's Santana by the way, Santana, my husband Greg," Genevieve cut in with her introduction.

"The artist," Greg smiled, his eyes confused when both Santana and Brittany giggled.

"You could say that," Santana said, biting back her laughter.

"Am I missing something?" Greg asked, looking back and forward between the two girls.

"Uh, let's just say that I don't usually use my powers for good," Santana said cryptically with a smile.

"Yeah she usually uses them for porn," Brittany told them. Santana blushed crimson as Greg burst out laughing at the blonde's announcement.

"Oh that is classic!" Greg crowed with laughter.

"Thanks for that B," Santana muttered, embarrassed.

"What? You do use them for porn," Brittany said, confused.

"I think she means she didn't want you to tell us that," Greg elaborated, patting the blonde on the shoulder.

"Oh I get it," Brittany beamed.

"On another topic," Santana said loudly, her eyes determinedly focussed on her feet. "Coach Sylvester and Mr Schue wanted me to ask you if you wanted them to find you guys somewhere else to live. They said if you do, they'll sort it out and even help you move your stuff, or do it for you if you prefer not to go back…" Santana trailed off.

"That would be fantastic. I don't want to go back there," Genevieve shook her head.

"I'm happy to help them with that," Greg pulled out a business card and handed it to Santana. "They can reach me on my cell any time after six," he told her.

"Ok. I'll let them know," Santana tucked the card in her pocket. "Come on B, I'd better get you and Q home," she said shyly, tugging at Brittany's sleeve.

"Bye," Brittany said brightly as Santana tugged her out of the room with a brief wave.

"They're funny," Greg smiled at Genevieve after the two girls had left. "And sweet," he added.

"They really are. They've been great to Tasha," Genevieve smiled back. "We owe them big time."

Glee!

That's all for this one. Next up…I don't know yet. I had a plan, I have deviated from the plan…so now I will just go with it and see where we end up…could be interesting.

That little moment with the baby grabbing Brittany's cheeks and putting his eyes right up to hers is something that one of our seven month old babies at work does to me, only he gives me sweet little kisses on the tip of my nose before he pulls away. It is completely and utterly adorable and I must confess to practically melting into a puddle every single time he does it.


	16. Chapter 15

Appearances

**A/N:** Natasha comes home. Starting to get more into the Brittana aspect now, since you are all losing patience with me haha. Nah not really. Truth is _I'm_ losing patience with me and can't be bothered depriving myself of getting into their relationship any longer, so enjoy!

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Glee…

Glee!

Chapter Fifteen:

Three weeks after the attack Natasha was finally released from the hospital. The entire Glee Club were waiting for her when the car pulled up in front of their new house. Natasha beamed happily when she saw them all, standing under a 'Welcome Home' banner. Her smile faded when her Dad got the wheelchair out of the trunk though. Her leg was healing well but because of her injured arm and shoulder she couldn't use crutches. They were planning on putting a walking cast on in three weeks time, if her surgery scar looked ok, and getting her walking in that, potentially with one crutch, but until then she was in a wheelchair. And she hated it. Worse than the pain, the bad dreams and flashbacks and the constant hunger from only being able to eat liquids with her wired jaw, was her complete dependence on other people for the most basic of things, getting dressed, bathing, using the bathroom…it was humiliating and Natasha couldn't wait until she was more mobile and could begin to do things for herself again.

"Hey Warrior Princess," Puck grinned as he gently scooped Natasha out of the car and set her in her chair. Natasha rolled her eyes at Puck's new favourite nickname for her, but then she supposed it was better than his previous favourite nickname for her, Carpet Queen…

"Puckerman," she smirked. "You know you can do that without copping a feel," she told him as he pulled his arm out from under her back, accidently brushing her breast as he did it.

"Yeah right," Puck laughed making a point of leering down her top. Natasha raised her good hand and flipped him off over her shoulder as he wheeled her toward the house.

"Now, now, that's no way to thank the guy who gave up his precious time to make your new room all pretty for you!" Puck scolded jokingly as they reached the rest of the club.

"Yeah yeah, hey guys," Natasha smiled shyly at the rest of the club.

"Come on you have to see your new room!" Brittany shrieked excitedly over the chorus of greetings, from where she was sitting on Artie's lap. Natasha looked up at the blonde and did a double take when her eyes landed on Santana. She was scowling darkly at the back of Artie's head but that in itself wasn't what surprised Natasha. What surprised her was the fleeting hurt look in the Latina's eyes and the almost imperceptible tremble of her bottom lip when Brittany impulsively kissed Artie's cheek. The look was gone as quickly as it appeared though and Natasha shook it off, storing it away for analysis later.

"Lead the way B," she smiled at the blonde who leaped up and walked into the house. They had clearly been thinking about Natasha's recovery and mobility when they had picked this house, there were no steps to the front door, just a small lip to get her chair over and it was all one storey. Brittany led them down a hall and stopped in front of a door, shifting from one foot to the other in anticipation. She beamed at Natasha again before opening the door to let Natasha see the result of their hard work.

"Oh wow!" Natasha breathed. The walls had been painted a pretty lilac colour, Natasha's favourite, her parents had bought her all new room furniture which was beautiful wood stained black, and there was a pale blue comforter on the bed with lilac sheets and pillow cases. "I love it," she whispered.

"We all thought you deserved a nice room," Puck told her, with a genuine smile. "Brittany found out your favourite colour and then Kurt designed around that," he told her.

"I wondered," Natasha said softly, craning her head to smile at Kurt who was proudly admiring his handiwork. "Thank you so much," she told them.

"All of your stuff is here. If you can't find anything, there are a few boxes in the closet, it'll be in there," Quinn told her. "Santana, Brittany and I moved your room," she explained. Natasha had a sudden thought. Her eyes scanned the room and landed on the bedside table. Sitting there in its frame was her precious note from Ella. Natasha breathed a sigh of relief. A hand landed on her shoulder and Natasha looked up, locking eyes with Rachel.

"I figured that was important to you," she whispered, nodding toward the framed note, her eyes communicating that she had realised it's significance.

"Thank you," Natasha nodded, gratefully. They showed her around the rest of the house before she got tired and then took her back to her room, Puck scooping her up again and setting her down on the bed. "Thanks Puck," she yawned.

"Anytime Warrior Princess," he told her, leaning down to kiss her cheek. Everyone hung around a while longer at Natasha's request, all lounging around her room. Brittany had practically bowled Quinn over in her haste to curl up next to Natasha on the bed. Natasha had noticed that same fleeting hurt look in Santana's eyes as her eyes landed on their hands; Brittany's fingers were tickling the inside of Natasha's wrist. Natasha gently pulled her arm away from Brittany's, scratching her other arm as a cover for the action and shooting Santana an apologetic look. Santana looked away, realising she had been caught in a vulnerable moment. They filled Natasha in on all of the gossip about school, and regaled her with the tale of their near miss with Figgins, after they had all gotten drunk before a performance resulting in Brittany and Santana vomiting on stage, during an assembly for alcohol awareness week. Soon people started heading out and it wasn't long until it was just Natasha, Quinn, Santana, Brittany and Rachel left.

"Between the four of us we have all of your classes covered at school. One of us will always be there if you need anything ok?" Quinn told her. Natasha was going to start back at school on Monday. Just a few hours at a time to start with since her pain meds and the effort of doing anything meant that she got tired very easily.

"Ok," Natasha said, sadly.

"Honey, I know you hate this but it won't be for too much longer," Brittany told her gently, wrapping an arm around her waist comfortingly. Natasha just looked at her, that same sad look in her eyes before she looked away.

"Can you get the pictures out of my bag?" she asked softly after a moment. "Mom put them in a binder for me." Santana grabbed the bag from where Greg had placed it in the hallway and located the binder, handing it to Natasha, who flicked through quickly before setting it down beside her. "Thanks."

"Do you need us to go?" Quinn asked gently.

"I don't know," Natasha whimpered; tears gathering at the corner's of her eyes. "I don't know what I want. I don't know what I feel. I'm anxious and scared and happy to be away from the hospital and upset to be out at the same time. I love my new room but I miss my old one and I feel like I won't get closure until I can go back there. I'm so confused!" the words all tumbled out of Natasha's mouth at once, leaving her gasping for air when she finished. "I think I need a sleep," she whimpered.

"We can stay until you fall asleep if you like?" Quinn asked gently, sitting next to Natasha and wiping a few tears from her cheeks.

"Ok," Natasha said softly. Brittany helped her change into a pair of shorts and a tank to sleep in and helped her to get semi comfortable in her bed, before curling up next to her, stroking her hair and humming softly. Natasha was asleep in minutes, exhausted from the physical and emotional upheavals of the day.

Glee!

When Natasha finally woke it was pitch dark out. She glanced at her clock and the red glowing numbers read 11:28. She was trying to gently shift her sore leg to get more comfortable when she heard a scrape outside the window and froze. The window opened and an oddly familiar shadowy figure climbed in. Natasha felt terror begin to rise but it subsided just as quickly when the moonlight from a gap in the curtains briefly illuminated her intruder's face. It was Santana. Santana came closer to the bed and Natasha faked sleep, now curious as to what the other girl was doing. She felt the back of a cool hand brush her uninjured cheek gently, then soft lips on her forehead. Then all contact was gone and she could hear Santana's breathing from somewhere near the end of the bed. Natasha continued to fake sleep until she heard Santana's breathing even out, and then she opened her eyes. The Latina was curled up, sound asleep, sitting on the floor against the end of her bed, her head resting next to Natasha's feet. Natasha watched her sleep a while, still wondering why she was here, until the other girl's peaceful, even breathing lulled her back to sleep herself. When she awoke at 7am the next morning the other girl, and all traces of her presence, were gone.

Glee!

Santana wordlessly pulled Brittany's soft blonde hair into a pony tail as the other girl sat, seemingly lost in thought, her face was troubled. When Santana had tightened her pony and moved to redo her lip gloss Brittany told her she wanted to talk. Next thing the other girl was on about how she and Wheels would talk about feelings when they were together. Panic rose inside Santana as Brittany initiated the one conversation Santana had been terrified of having since they had started messing around together. She shot back with a simple "Why?"

"Because it's better with feelings," Brittany told her, her face simultaneously, confused, anxious and sulky at Santana's sudden attitude.

"Are you kidding?" Santana threw out flippantly. "It's better when it doesn't involve feelings. I think it's better when it doesn't involve eye contact." Santana held in a grimace at how defensive she sounded as she said it. She busied herself picking clothes and pillows up off the floor where they'd landed during their romp on Santana's bed.

"I don't know Santana, I think we should talk to someone. This relationship is really confusing for me," Brittany said softly.

"Breakfast is confusing for you," Santana spat back bitingly, her eyes darting around the room, refusing to fixate on Brittany for more than a few seconds at a time, lest the other girl see how much she was freaking out right now.

Glee!

Natasha awoke at 3am and spotted the now familiar and surprisingly comforting silhouette of Santana curled up at the end of her bed. She had been sneaking in every night since Natasha had moved home. Tonight something was off though. Natasha stared at the Latinas face, her normally peaceful expression was now troubled, she had dried tear tracks on her cheeks and her eyes were red and puffy.

"Santana?" Natasha called out softly. The other girl woke with a start and almost leapt five feet into the air.

"Holy shit!" she gasped in a loud whisper.

"Sorry," Natasha whispered apologetically. "You don't have to sleep on the floor you know," she told her friend, awkwardly shuffling closer to the edge of the queen sized bed and patting the empty space beside her. Santana moved to sit next to her, feeling awkward at being caught playing guard dog.

"Thanks," she said, her voice reflecting the awkwardness she was trying to hide. "I…um…I didn't want to be alone tonight," Santana tried to cover her tracks. It wasn't a lie exactly, more of an omission of parts of the truth.

"Santana you've been here every night since I came home," Natasha smiled slightly.

"You knew?" Santana asked, looking away. "How come you didn't say anything?"

"I was afraid you'd stop coming," Natasha admitted. "It's comforting knowing you were here. Looking out for me," Natasha's hand found Santana's and she squeezed it gently. "Are you ok?" she asked gently, cocking her head to one side, her eyes concerned. "You look upset."

"I'm fine. I'm just…going through some stuff. I don't wanna talk about it," Santana surprised herself with her own honesty.

"Ok," Natasha squeezed her hand reassuringly again. "You can get under the blankets," she told her.

"I'm in clothes. I don't want to get your bed dirty," Santana replied.

"There's pyjamas in there somewhere," Natasha gestured to the dresser with a nod of her head. "Help yourself." Santana stood silently and grabbed a pair of shorts and a tank top, quickly changing into them, and crawling into the bed next to Natasha.

"Thanks Tasha," she whispered, snuggling down into warm sheets that smelled like lavender fabric softener and Natasha. A soft hand found its way into hers in the middle of the bed and squeezed gently before slipping away again. Santana closed her eyes and heard Natasha give a contented sigh before her breathing quickly evened out into the lulling rhythm of sleep. Santana shuffled slightly closer to Natasha before she gave in to sleep herself.

Glee!

How she had ended up singing the ultimate unrequited love song to her best friend, with Holly Holliday, in front of the Glee Club was still somewhat of a mystery to Santana. One simple conversation about feelings with Brittany and Pandora's Box had opened, spilling out all of the feelings that Santana had kept neatly and safely locked away since she started sleeping with her best friend nearly two years ago. Santana was caught in a whirlwind of emotions, a lot of which she couldn't understand, and she was so overwhelmed by it all that she could barely figure out which way was up anymore. Her life had turned upside down, things that she had packed away and refused to acknowledge before had clawed their way to the surface and were all begging to be dealt with at once. The one thing she did know for sure scared her more than all of the things that she didn't. The one thing Santana Lopez knew for sure was that somewhere along the way she had fallen head over heels in love with her best friend…and she was going to tell her. She took a deep breath and walked over to where Brittany was retrieving books from her locker. Mindful of the people around her, Santana began pouring her heart out, talking about how she had realised that she was a bitch because she was angry and she was angry because she had feelings for Brittany and that she couldn't act on them for fear of the consequences. Brittany looked confused and when Santana asked if she understood what she was trying to say, Brittany admitted that she didn't.

"No, not really," she shook her head slightly.

"I want to be with you, but I'm afraid of the talks and the looks. I mean, you know what happened to Kurt at this school," Santana told her, her voice trembling.

"But, honey, if anybody were to ever make fun of you, you would either kick their ass or slash them with your vicious, vicious words," Brittany said gently.

"Yea, I know, but I'm so afraid of what everyone will say behind my back," Santana's voice was cracking now. "Still, I have to accept that…I love you. I love *you*, and I don't want to be with Sam, or Finn, or any of those other guys. I just want you. Please say you love me back. Please," Santana begged, tears escaping down her cheeks. "

"Of course I love you! I do! And I would totally be with you if it wasn't for Artie," Brittany replied gently. Santana felt her heart shatter into a million pieces.

"Artie?" she said, confused.

"I love him, too. I don't want to hurt him, that's not right. I can't break up with him," Brittany tried to explain.

"Yes, you can! He's just a stupid boy!" Santana cried.

"But it wouldn't be right. Santana, you have to know, if Artie and I were to ever break up, and I'm lucky enough that you're still single, I'm so yours. Proudly so," Brittany said, using that same soft, comforting voice that made Santana angrier and more devastated with every word.

"Yeah, well, wow. Whoever thought that for being fluid, you could be so stuck," she sobbed. Brittany stepped forward trying to hug her.

_"_Get off me!" Santana sobbed angrily, pushing Brittany's shoulders hard and stepping away.

"Don't," Brittany tried to stop Santana from running away. "I'm sorry!" she tried, but Santana was stalking away from her. Brittany could see her shoulders shaking with sobs as she all but ran down the hall to get away from her.

Glee!

Santana went home first, curling up on her bed and sobbing until her ribs hurt. When she finally calmed a little she realised that her sheets and pillows smelled like Brittany, which sent her into a new round of hysterical sobbing. She ripped the sheets off the bed, taking them down the hall and throwing them into the washing machine and using way more detergent and fabric softener than was strictly necessary. Then she went back to her room. Everything there reminded her of Brittany though and of the moments that they had shared in there. In an emotional frenzy Santana threw the framed photos of the two of them on the ground, shattering the glass, she yanked open a drawer and pulled out her keepsake box, pulling out everything that pertained to Brittany, more photos, every friendship bracelet the blonde had ever made her (about 25 in total), notes that they had written to each other and threw it all in her trashcan. Then she had to get out. So she slammed her bedroom door and ran out of the house. She arrived at Quinn's just in time to see Quinn let Brittany in the front door.

Glee!

Natasha was watching some terrible, based-on-a-true-story movie that her Mom had gotten out when her bedroom door suddenly opened, revealing an absolutely distraught Santana sobbing her heart out.

"Santana!" Natasha said, shocked by the girl's appearance. "Sweetheart what's wrong?" she asked worriedly. Santana's mouth opened and closed a few times but she could get the words to come out. "Is someone hurt?" Natasha asked anxiously. Santana shook her head as she stepped into the room. "Come here," Natasha held out her good arm and Santana's sobs ratcheted up in intensity as she all but collapsed onto the bed, crawling up to lie beside Natasha. Natasha wriggled painfully closer, tugging at Santana, trying to get the girl closer so that she could hug her properly. She reached out with her heavy cast, managing to roll Santana toward her a little. "Stupid, fucking casts," she hissed as she tried to manoeuvre the two of them into a comfortable position. Her insistent tugging eventually got through to Santana who rolled properly onto her side, curling up against Natasha's left side, burying her face in the crook of her shoulder. She felt the heavy cast of Natasha's injured arm come to rest across her back and felt her good hand tangle in her hair, holding her as tightly as she could as Santana just sobbed and sobbed. She jumped when she felt the bed dip behind her, not having heard anyone come in.

"Oh baby," she heard Genevieve sigh softly from behind her. "What happened?" she asked her daughter.

"I have no idea. She's crying too hard to tell me," Santana vaguely registered that Natasha's voice sounded wobbly, like she was about to cry too.

"Jem let her in and then came and told me she was crying really bad," Genevieve said quietly, as Santana felt the bed shift and felt the woman moving to sit on the bed next to her, using her own good arm to rub her back and stroke her hair. The room lapsed into silence, and Santana's mind was so tired that while she was aware of the goings on around her, they were extremely vague, like she was underwater or something. She felt the comforting touches from Genevieve and Natasha, she was aware of being sat up and a glass of water being pressed to her lips, she felt the cool water sliding down her throat as she drank greedily, dehydrated from all of the tears she had shed.

She was laid back down and a blanket was tucked around her and the last things she felt before she fell into an exhausted sleep were the small body wriggling into the space between her back and Genevieve's legs, the small hand stoking her forehead and the familiar little voice cooing soothingly into her ear "Don't cry 'Tana, It'll be ok, I promise."

Glee!

A little heavy on the show dialogue in places but I just loved how that exchange went down and I wanted to include it in this chapter…

Also a bit shorter than previous chapters but it's an update!


	17. Chapter 16

Appearances

**A/N:**Sorry, sorry, sorry it took so long getting this one up and that it isn't the best I've ever written. I've just been so blocked lately, it's been ridiculous. I must have tried writing this one five times before I got anywhere with it! Thank you, thank you, thank you for your patience!

Also to the person/persons who feel the need to leave somewhat rude reviews anytime I use dialogue and plot from the show, My plan is for the Brittana storyline to run alongside that of the show up until Rumours (-ish) so there will be more of that happening for a while. Kindly refrain from the quasi-rude comments. If you don't like it either bear with me for the next few chapters until I deviate from the show or read something else please.

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Glee…

Glee!

Chapter Sixteen:

"Tasha?" Natasha frowned and tried to ignore the voice that was trying to interrupt her sleep. "Tasha?" the voice trembled and Natasha forced one eye open, the clock read 11.10pm.

"Huh?" she mumbled. As consciousness crept back in Natasha realised that Santana was sitting up beside her, poking at her arm, her face still puffy from earlier. "What's wrong Santana?" Natasha asked sleepily, running her good hand over her face.

"Sorry I woke you," Santana apologised. "I needed to talk," her voice hitched and Natasha's heart ached. Even with just the dull glow given off by her nightlight to see by, Natasha could see the intense pain in the other girl's dark eyes.

"That's ok," Natasha yawned, wincing at the pull in her jaw and wriggled a little to try and loosen up her stiff muscles. She sat up and wriggled back to lean against the headboard, waiting for Santana to speak. When she didn't, Natasha reached out and grabbed her hand, threading their fingers together comfortingly. Santana gave a quiet sob and Natasha tugged at her hand, urging her closer. Santana ended up settled with her head on Natasha's shoulder and after the longest time she finally spoke.

"Thanks," was all she could find to say.

"Welcome," Natasha said lightly. "Look, Santana, I know you aren't ready to talk about whatever it is that happened today and that's ok. I'm not going to push you. But I'm here if you ever need to talk. About anything. Ok?" She told the other girl, squeezing her hand and smiling. She felt Santana nod against her shoulder.

"Thank-you," she repeated, lifting her head to kiss Natasha's cheek, resting it back against her shoulder afterwards. "I'm sorry I hit you…and tried to eye gouge you...and that I told everyone you're a lesbian. I didn't know that was true. I was just being mean," Santana blurted randomly, her need to apologise for past behaviour suddenly getting the best of her. She lifted her head in alarm when Natasha's shoulders began shaking, surprised and a little confused to find that she was shaking not in tears as she had expected, but in silent laughter. "What's funny?" she asked.

"That was you?" Natasha spluttered breathlessly.

"Yeah," Santana hung her head. She felt awful having accidently outed the girl. She had an all new respect for gay teenagers had the courage to be out and hold their heads up high in spite of the bullying they experienced. Natasha stopped laughing when she saw the look in Santana's eyes. Her green eyes bored into the darker ones in front of her and Santana got the sudden, distinct feeling that Natasha was staring straight into her soul, reading her as easily as she would read a book. She squirmed uncomfortably under the intense gaze, looking determinedly down at her hands.

"Hey," Natasha used her fingers to tilt Santana's face back up to look her in the eye. "It's ok. I'm actually grateful for it," at Santana's questioning gaze Natasha shrugged. "I like not having to hide. Even if I did take a slushie to the face over it. You did me a favour."

"I did?" Santana's voice was small and laced with confusion and a little relief that Natasha was seemingly keeping the conversation about herself.

"Yeah you did," Natasha nodded with a small smile. "Look at us. Who'd have thought that after all of that fighting we'd end up here? Friends," Natasha changed the subject lightly and smiled again as she thought back over how far they'd come in the space of a few short months.

"Why did you start picking fights with me?" Santana asked the question that had been bugging her for months. The girl had swept into McKinley, immediately picked Quinn, Brittany and Santana as the Head Bitches, then honed in on Santana as the scrappy type and started provoking her.

"I wanted to show from the start that I wouldn't be bossed around. I wouldn't do anyone's bidding…ever again," Natasha severed eye contact, her green eyes going brighter as tears welled in them. Santana followed her line of sight, her eyes landing on the framed card on the bedside table beside her. She picked it up, running her fingers over the frame, before gently replacing it.

"Yeah, I get that," she said gently, trying to show the girl that she knew what she meant. Natasha wriggled slowly down the bed until she was lying down again, her head turned away from Santana, who watched her for a few moments before lying down beside her, shifting across the bed until their arms were pressed together between them, canting her head toward the other girl. "I'm glad we're friends," she offered. Natasha turned her head back to Santana, the corners of her lips quirking up in a tiny smile.

"Me too," she whispered. Both girls lapsed into silence, Natasha falling asleep a few minutes later.

Glee!

Quinn wriggled uncomfortably, trying to move away from Brittany and free her arm from where it was pinned under the other girl's ribcage, all without waking the sleeping blonde. It was like a Chinese finger trap; the more she tried to wriggle free the tighter Brittany's grip on her became. Quinn blew air out through her teeth in frustration.

"B you have to get off of my arm," She said, shaking the blonde lightly. Brittany rolled away mumbling something that sounded vaguely like 'Sorry Q,' before curling into herself and settling back into sleep. Quinn curled onto her side, watching the other girl, whose usually peaceful face was troubled, even in her sleep. Quinn still had precious little idea of what had transpired that day. Brittany had turned up on her doorstep after school; distraught and mumbling incoherently about breaking Santana's heart and not wanting to hurt Artie. As soon as Quinn had held out her arms the taller girl had thrown herself into them, sobbing inconsolably. Quinn had tried everything to get her to stop crying but nothing had helped at all so in the end she resorted to an old trick. She put Anchorman in the DVD player, pulled her secret stash of chocolate out of her underwear drawer and just cuddled up with Brittany until her whimpers turned to sniffles and she eventually quieted. Ron Burgundy had just been fired when Brittany spoke.

"I think Santana hates me," she had said sadly before turning her attention back to the movie. She hadn't said anything else and Quinn had known better than to push her. She figured it had something to do with their performance of Landslide during Glee. Quinn didn't think she had ever seen Santana show any emotion that wasn't angry or horny so strongly. Quinn had shifted closer to Brittany and gently brushed her bangs out of her eyes before turning her own attention back to the movie. After the movie she had made Brittany dinner and then curled up with her to watch The Lion King at Brittany's request. Brittany had fallen asleep about two thirds of the way through, curled in Quinn's arms like a child.

Glee!

"Natasha? Honey there's a very nervous looking boy here to see you," Genevieve stuck her head into her daughter's room, hoping she wasn't waking her. Natasha looked up from her book, confused.

"Who?" she asked.

"He says his name is Dave and he refuses to come into the house until I make sure it's ok with you," Genevieve shrugged.

"Dave? Tall, solid guy in a football team letterman jacket?" Natasha asked. Surely Karofsky wouldn't be here.

"Yeah that's him," Genevieve nodded.

"Yeah tell him to come in," Natasha marked her page and put the book down. She shifted into a more upright position on her bed as her mom disappeared again. She was glad Santana had helped her to clean up her room and make her bed that morning before she had gone home. There was a light knock on the door then. "Come in," Natasha called out.

"Um…hey," a very nervous Dave Karofsky walked into her room.

"Hey," Natasha smiled slightly. Karofsky approached the bed and looked around for a few seconds before producing a beautiful pink lilly from where he had had it tucked behind his leg. He held it out to her awkwardly, not looking her in the eye as he did. "It's beautiful, thank you," Natasha was floored to say the least. "Lillies are my favourite."

"I…um…I know. I asked Brittany which ones you like," he replied, further stunning the brunette.

"That was sweet of you," Natasha smiled at him.

"I…I…" he stammered before suddenly striding over and closing the door. He came back over and hovered awkwardly until Natasha told him he could sit down. He sat near her feet, his back to her. "I wanted…to…to take you up on your offer," he said quietly. Natasha frowned a moment before it hit her; "_I want you to know that if you want someone to talk to, someone that you don't have to hide your true self from. Come and see me." _

"Ok," she said gently.

"I'm confused," he whispered. "I'm confused and scared and I feel like everyone knows. I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop, for the day when I walk into that school and get slushied, or thrown in a dumpster, or toppled in a port-a-potty…or worse…" he dropped his head into his hands and scrubbed at his temples.

"Yeah I know that feeling all too well," Natasha replied gently. "Honey I know it feels like it's tattooed on your forehead right now, you feel like it's all so strong that it must be showing on the outside, but it isn't. No one knows," she assured him.

"You knew," he shot back, finally looking up at her, his eyes accusing.

"I have excellent gaydar," Natasha deadpanned.

"Kurt Hummel knows," Karofsky told her.

"Again, excellent gaydar. Not as good as mine though," Natasha joked lightly. Karofsky stood and moved to sit closer to Natasha on the bed. She watched as his hand moved toward hers on the bed and then stopped, resting a couple of inches away.

"No," he said softly. "I kissed him." Natasha had not expected that and it took her a moment to recover. She shifted so that she could reach his hand and slipped her uninjured hand into it. "I threatened to kill him if he told," Natasha sucked in a breath suddenly understanding what had made the boy go from pushing Kurt to death threats. "I can go-," Karofsky tried to pull away but Natasha held on tight.

"Don't," she ordered softly. "Hey, you freaked. You panicked. What you did was wrong, yes, but I understand why you did it. Look at me," she told him, tugging at his hand, trying to get him to look up. "You need to apologise to Kurt," she told him.

"I can't…I can't look him in the eye right now and say-," he began.

"You don't have to," Natasha interrupted. "You could write him a letter first. He and Blaine visit here a lot. I can slip it to him when Blaine's distracted."

"I don't know if I can," Karofsky told her.

"You need to do something," Natasha pressed.

"I know. I'm a terrible person," he told her.

"No. I'm sure as shit not condoning what you did, but when you're so confused, conflicted, scared…it makes you do stupid shit. And let me tell you from personal experience, when that stupid shit involves hurting other people, you should try to make it right as soon as possible. Or you might never get a chance to," Natasha told him, her voice gaining in intensity as she spoke. "And no one wants to live with that on their conscience," Natasha gave an involuntary shudder. Karofsky studied her for a few moments before turning to face her properly for the first time since he had come into the room. His grip on her hand tightened and he took a deep breath as Natasha watched him carefully.

"Natasha," he said quietly. "I'm gay." He let out a huge breath of air and shot her a small smile.

"David, so am I," Natasha grinned, ignoring the slight pain it still caused.

"I never told anyone that before." Karofsky told her. Natasha smiled back at him again.

"Feels good to tell someone though doesn't it?" Natasha asked, receiving an answering nod. "Look at us bonding!" she joked making Karofsky laugh.

"Yeah, well…I'm still going to be an ass to you at school. You know that right?" he told her.

"And I'm still going to use every excuse to threaten to cut your balls off," Natasha replied, with a nonchalant shrug of her shoulders.

"Fair enough," Karofsky grinned. Natasha sat up and held out her arms.

"Come here and let me hug you," she ordered, surprised that he immediately leaned down, gently wrapping his arms around her.

"Thank you," he whispered next to her ear.

"Anytime," she whispered back.

"I'll uh, see you at school," Karofsky told her as he walked toward the door, awkwardness beginning to creep back in as his walls went back up.

"See you at school. Thank you for the lilly. I love it," she told him as he pulled her door closed behind him.

Glee!

Two days after Santana's emotional confession and Santana was standing at her locker when a soft, sad voice spoke up beside her.

"Hey." Santana didn't answer so Brittany pushed on. "Can I ask you a question? We used to be really close, and I really miss being your friend."

"Still waiting for the question," Santana snapped angrily.

"Did I do something wrong?" Brittany's voice was so heartbreakingly sad that it almost broke through Santana's anger. Almost.

"I don't know, did you?" Santana snapped, turning to look at the blonde. "All I know is that you blew me off to be with Stubbles McCripplepants," Brittany flinched at the insult but Santana ignored it and kept going. "But it's your loss," she said flippantly. "Because now I get the chance to write an awesome heterosexual song about Sam, that we're going to sing at Regionals." Brittany looked confused.

"Wait, you're still dating Sam?" she asked. "But you told me you were in love with me."

"Honesty I don't know what I was thinking," Santana said, turning back to her locker. Brittany stared at her sadly. "Look can you stop staring at me? I can't remember my locker combo." Brittany was about to speak but she was interrupted by a voice behind them.

"Well, well. If it isn't tweedle-dumb and tweedle-fake-boobs," Sue Sylvester sneered. Brittany surprised Santana by standing up to the woman, saying she couldn't speak to them like that anymore now that she wasn't their cheer coach. Sue proceeded to rant about how that was their fault and the exchange ended with both girls opening their lockers and ending up covered in the piles of dirt that Sue had put in there the night before.

Ten minutes later they stood awkwardly in the bathroom as they both tried to clean themselves up as best they could. They were both lucky to have changes of clothes in their bags that day. Once she had washed her face and rinsed the dirt out of her mouth, Brittany started pulling her clothes off. Santana huffed and picked up the blonde's bag, shoving her none too gently into a stall and dropping the bag in after her, pulling the door shut and locking it from the outside. She went into the furthest stall away and began to change her own clothes.

"San?" Brittany called out softly, confused as to why Santana had just done that when usually they had no issue with changing in front of each other. Santana ignored her, fighting back tears as she pulled her clean shirt on. Brittany didn't call out again and soon they were standing at the sinks again, reapplying their makeup. Brittany kept looking at Santana, who was doggedly focused on her own reflection, trying to ignore the hurt blue eyes that were almost burning her with the intensity of their gaze. Wordlessly Santana finished applying her makeup and checked her hair one last time to make sure all of the dirt was gone before picking up her bag and moving to leave. On her way out she paused, briefly, to brush the last little bit of dirt that Brittany had missed out of her silky blonde hair. Then she was gone, leaving Brittany in the bathroom, alone, with a lump in her throat and tears in her eyes.

Glee!

Puck was pushing Natasha's wheelchair out to the parking lot to meet her mom when they ran into a crying Rachel Berry in the hallway.

"Rachel? What's wrong?" Natasha asked worriedly.

"Nothing," Rachel sobbed. Natasha looked at her, her head cocked to one side.

"Rach take Tash out to meet her mom would you?" Puck said, deserting as quick as he could, leaving Natasha to deal with yet another crying girl.

"Come on Rachel, come and tell Tashie what happened," Natasha cooed, like she was talking to a three year old having a tantrum. It had the desired effect of making Rachel smile and Natasha grinned back. "Made ya smile!" she said victoriously.

"Shut up," Rachel laughed slightly. "Quinn got mean," she said by way of explanation. "Nothing new."

"Well if it isn't Dyke on Wheels!" Karofsky sneered as he and Azimio walked past Natasha.

"Fuck your Mom Karofsky," Natasha snapped back, fighting a smile. "What did Quinn do this time?" there was a flash of anger in Natasha's eyes as she spoke. Rachel, sniffling the whole way through, recounted her encounter with the prickly blonde in the auditorium.

"I love him. I love him and she doesn't. She just wants him so that I can't have him!" Rachel's voice got so high in her anger that Natasha thought her eardrums might pop.

"Well, maybe that's true," Natasha nodded to placate the upset brunette. "Or maybe she's got her claws in him so deep because she's afraid that if she lets go of him she might never find anyone else. She'd rather settle for someone she doesn't love than risk ending up with no one." Natasha couldn't not stick up for Quinn and she watched as Rachel mulled her words over. Her face went from angry, to sullen, to something Natasha couldn't place. Then her chair was moving and Rachel was babbling at a million miles an hour about not giving up without a fight and about having an idea for a song and needing to write it down. She handed Natasha off to Genevieve in the parking lot and took off without saying goodbye.

When she got home and the emotion hit her all over again, Rachel Berry spent hours bawling her eyes out and writing an awesome song for Regionals.

Glee!

Thanks so much for reading! And thanks again for your patience with me. Hopefully I'm past the worst of this ridiculous block and can get on with it a bit quicker. I might get another chapter up this weekend since it's a long one for Queen's Birthday but not promising anything. Thanks also for all of the lovely reviews!


	18. Chapter 17

Appearances

**A/N:** Glad you all are enjoying the story so much and I can't tell you how grateful I am for all of the lovely reviews you all have been giving me. For those who came looking for a Brittana fix and are loving the story despite the slowness of that storyline, thanks for sticking with it and I'm glad you have come to like it for what it is. There will be Brittana that much I promise. I truly write for writing's sake but the lovely feedback and the alerts and favourites are an awesome added bonus for me.

And smilingmaniacs your reviews crack me up and make my day. You don't have to apologise for them!

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Glee…

Glee!

Chapter Seventeen:

Santana waited until she heard her father's loud snoring coming from down the hall before she slipped out of her room, crept down the stairs - careful to avoid the creaky one – and grabbed her keys from the hook. She was about to sneak out of the front door when a voice startled her.

"Santana where are you going?" Louisa asked from her position leaning against the wall. At her daughter's deer in headlights look Louisa rolled her eyes. "I'm not that oblivious Santana. I hear your car leave. Where have you been going?" she asked. Santana looked around evasively before looking back at her mother. She considered lying but figured she wasn't doing anything wrong so she may as well be honest for once in her life.

"Tasha's house," she admitted.

"Really?" Louisa asked disbelieving.

"Really Mami," Santana said, her voice trembling. Louisa moved closer to her daughter, cupping her cheeks and staring into her eyes, searching. She was surprised to see only truth in the dark brown orbs. Santana stared up at her mother, into eyes so like her own, and felt her walls begin to crumble. She suddenly wanted her mother to know how desperately confused and unhappy she was. She fought it though, her terror of the consequences overtaking the urge to tell.

"Why?" Louisa asked, stroking the girl's cheeks with her thumbs. Concern rose within her as her daughter's eyes darted all over the place, pain and terror evident in the dark orbs. Santana mumbled something that Louisa couldn't catch and a tear leaked from the corner of her eye. "I can't hear you mija," she said softly, rubbing the tear away with her thumb.

"To protect her," Santana repeated, louder, her voice cracking.

"From what Santana? Her brother can't hurt her anymore," Louisa pulled Santana into the living room, sitting her down on the couch as the teenager struggled to find the words, tears now streaming down her cheeks.

"But the memories can," Santana sobbed. "She has bad dreams Mami. She screams and cries in her sleep. She _pleads_ withhim to hurt her and not her Mom and sister. I hold her and cuddle her and sing to her until she settles down. Mostly she doesn't wake up, and even when she does she goes right back to sleep and doesn't remember in the morning," Santana told her, the words all spilling out on top of each other. "I can't leave her to face that alone! She needs me!" Santana tried to pull away from her mother but Louisa held tight.

"And you need her. You need to hold her, and soothe her, and make it all better because it makes you feel less helpless, it makes you feel needed," Louisa stroked her daughter's hair, trying to swallow the lump in her throat as she felt Santana nod against her. She sighed deeply and pulled back again to look in her daughter's eyes. "Santana I'm so worried about you. You're just not…you anymore. You're quiet and withdrawn, and you walk around here like a little zombie, looking…so desperately sad...haunted even. You haven't had Britt over here in weeks. You don't even talk about her anymore. You just don't talk. You've lost weight, probably because you barely eat, it just seems like you're swimming through your life right now, barely keeping your head above the water," Louisa lost it then, her breath coming in ragged gasps as she held her daughter closer. "What's going on in your head Santana? Where are you?" It came out before Santana could stop it. Like word vomit.

"I love her Mami! I love Brittany and she doesn't love me back!" as soon as she realised what she had said; Santana froze. Then she was writhing against her mother's hold, scratching at her fingers and throwing her weight, fighting desperately to get away.

"Santana stop! Baby stop fighting me," Louisa held on to her daughter even as she dragged them both off of the couch and sent them crashing to the floor as she desperately fought to escape. "Santana it's ok, baby it's ok, it's ok, it's ok," Louisa chanted over and over as Santana slowly stopped fighting, gasping for air, her eyes wild with fear and panic.

"I'm sorry Mami!" Santana cried out hysterically. "I'm sorry! Please, please don't hate me. Please," she begged, her voice desperate and terrified.

"Oh my God Santana," Louisa sobbed, holding her tight. "Oh I could never ever hate you. Not for anything. Never," Santana was now in the vee of her Mom's legs, being held so tightly to her chest, her face buried in the crook of her neck, her arms gripping her mom's shoulders tightly.

"What's going on?" Carlos Lopez asked from the doorway, his face scrunching in concern as he saw his wife and daughter sobbing in each other's arms on the living room floor. "Santi?" he moved to kneel next to them as Santana's sobs ratcheted up in intensity, rubbing her back and looking fearfully into his wife's eyes. "Louisa what is going on?" he asked. Neither of them could speak and so Carlos just wrapped his arms round them and held them until Louisa settled down. Santana's breath continued coming in ragged gasps but she had stopped sobbing and she had collapsed, completely limp, against her mother.

"Santana, baby, no matter who you are, or who you love, your Papi and I love you," Louisa said as firmly as she could, stroking damp strands of hair out of Santana's face. Santana tensed again, her terrified eyes darting to her father's. He sat frozen in place, his eyes darkening. She waited for him to explode, to yell and scream and throw her out and tell her never to come back, she waited for him to tell her he hated her. He took a few steps back and sat, stock still and expressionless for what felt like hours to Santana.

"You hate me," she whimpered, turning her face away from her father, clinging to her mother, the tears beginning to flow all over again. Suddenly she felt herself being pulled from her mother's arms; she had no time to react before finding herself cradled against her father's chest, his arms tight around her, her face in the crook of his neck. She could feel his chest hitching and a few moments later she felt tears landing in her hair. Then she felt her mother shift and rest her head against her shoulder, her arm wrapping around Santana. Santana let out the breath she hadn't realised that she was holding. They weren't throwing her out. They weren't telling her they hated her. Her dad stroked her hair and pressed kisses to her head, over and over. Carlos couldn't find the words to tell his daughter that there was no way in the world that he could ever hate her. Instead he held her and kissed her hair for the longest time, until Louisa broke the silence.

"She's asleep," she said, her voice hoarse from crying. "God Carlos. She's just in agony over this." She stoked the long, jet black hair again.

"She's gay? That's what all this was?" he managed to croak out.

"I don't know. Maybe. All she said was that she loves Brittany and that Britt doesn't love her back," Louisa told him.

"How could she think that we would hate her?" Carlos asked, incredulously, lifting a hand from his daughter's back to scrub at his face.

"I don't know," Louisa shook her head. She reached over and shifted Santana back into her lap so that Carlos could stand up. He leaned down, sliding an arm behind his daughter's back and one under her knees, lifting her carefully. She stirred, wrapping her arms around his neck before drifting off again. Carlos carried her awkwardly up the stairs and into her room, setting her down gently on the bed. He stepped back as Louisa pulled Santana's shoes off and pulled the blankets up and over her. Louisa retrieved a damp face cloth from the bathroom and used it to wipe the dried tears from their daughter's cheeks, feeling the lump rise in her throat again at the sight of her daughter's swollen face.

"Louisa, look," Carlos said, pointing at Santana's garbage can. Louisa moved to stand beside him, staring at the contents of the bin. The broken photo frames and photos, the notes, the friendship bracelets. Everything Brittany had ever given to Santana. Louisa knelt next to the bin, carefully pulling out the contents, mindful of the broken glass in there. She carried everything to her and Carlos' bedroom, putting it neatly in a box in her closet, knowing that her daughter would regret losing it all if the maid threw it all out. She went back into Santana's room, finding Carlos perched on the edge of the bed, stroking her hair. They sat with their daughter a while before tucking her in, turning out the light and heading back to bed.

Glee!

Natasha was just drifting off to sleep at about 9pm when she heard her window slide open. She cracked an eye, confused as to why Santana was there so early, only to find teary blue eyes staring back at her.

"Britt?" Natasha mumbled sleepily.

"I didn't mean to wake you. Q said you leave the window open for Santana to sneak in," Brittany said, her voice shaky.

"Are you sad Britt?" Natasha tried to force her eyes to stay open.

"Can I cuddle with you?" Brittany asked, ignoring the question, her voice cracking and tears spilling over. "Just until San comes? Quinn wasn't home."

"Of course," Natasha said, propping herself on her elbows and squinting at Brittany. The blonde was swallowing hard, trying not to burst into tears as she crept around to the other side of the bed, pulling off her coat to reveal her pink duck pyjamas. She kicked off her shoes and crawled onto the bed, gently curling herself up against Natasha. "What's going on B?" Natasha asked, stroking blonde bangs away from blue eyes.

"My heart hurts," Brittany's voice broke and she didn't say another word, she just rested her head against Natasha's shoulder, her silent tears soaking into Natasha's top as Natasha held her. Natasha fell asleep quickly and Brittany followed not long after.

Natasha was awoken just after midnight by the ring tone of her cell phone. Thankfully Brittany had moved away a little and her good arm was free to grab the device. Natasha frowned when she realised Santana wasn't there. She guessed she had snuck in, seen Brittany and left again.

"Hello?" she answered the phone sleepily.

"Hi honey, it's Santana's mom Louisa," a voice said at the other end.

"Hi," Natasha's brain was sluggish with sleep.

"I'm sorry to wake you but I thought I should let you know that Santana won't be there tonight. She…uh…she's been a bit upset and she's crashed out. I know she comes every night and I thought you might worry when she didn't turn up," Louisa told her.

"Oh. Ok. Thanks for letting me know," Natasha said, quietly, struggling to stay awake. "I'll be ok. Britt is here," she told the woman.

"Oh good. Sleep tight honey," Louisa said gently, receiving a drowsy reply of 'Night,' before the phone went dead.

Glee!

"Alright Miss Natasha," Graham, Natasha's physiotherapist stated stepping back. "Let's see if we can't get you up on that thing!" he grinned. Natasha looked at her new leg cast nervously. Her xrays from the day before showed that her bones were healing nicely and they were going to try and get her walking a bit in a leg cast, to try and preserve some of her muscle tone.

"Ok," she agreed. Graham moved forward, grasping her left hand in his right and hooking his other hand behind her hip, pulling her to a standing position. Natasha's left leg almost immediately buckled, not having held her full weight like this for a while. Graham had been working that leg hard over the past few weeks, keeping her muscle tone up but her balance was all over the place. Graham held her until she got the leg under her properly. Then he stepped back, loosening his hold on her a bit.

"Alright, moment of truth," he beamed. Natasha hesitantly pushed her cast leg forward a few inches then lifted her good leg to catch up to it. She wobbled badly but stayed upright. A smile began to spread across her face as she took a second step, then a third. She giggled as she overbalanced and crashed into Graham on the fourth step. "Woohoo! That's a great start! We'll have you walking miles in no time!" Graham hugged her enthusiastically. He let her rest then had her do some more small steps, repeating the process over a few times before they shifted focus to her working her arm for the second half of her appointment.

She was sent home with instructions to walk as much as she liked, but not to push too hard and to always have a spotter. For the first time, Natasha really felt like she was healing.

Glee!

Santana slipped quietly in through her window just after 10pm that night. Natasha was awake and waiting for her. She was worried about her and having had a day full of specialist appointments she hadn't been at school.

"Shit, you're awake!" Santana got a fright when she turned and saw big green eyes watching her. She walked to the recliner and picked up the shorts and tank that had kind of unofficially become hers over the past few weeks.

"Mom washed those for you," Natasha told her, smiling. Her door opened as she said it and Genevieve came in.

"Oh hi Santana," she said and Natasha rolled her eyes, knowing that her Mom had been listening intently in the hallway, waiting for the girl to arrive.

"Hi Gen," Santana replied with a smile.

"You all set for the night Tash?" Genevieve asked.

"Yeah Mom," Natasha replied.

"Good. Sleep tight," she kissed her forehead and stroked her hair, before turning to Santana. "You too honey," she said softly, leaning in to give her a light hug. "Thank you," she whispered in her ear as she pulled back. She glanced into Santana's eyes checking that Santana understood. When she was satisfied, she left, closing the door gently behind her. Santana silently stripped off her clothes and pulled her shorts and tank on before taking her place in Natasha's bed.

"You got new casts," Santana observed. "How'd it all go?"

"Great. Got my jaw unwired," Natasha opened her mouth wide to show her. It was still slightly painful but it was nothing on what it had been.

"Awesome," Santana smiled.

"I walked!" Natasha told her excitedly. "I can only do a few steps at a time right now and my balance kinda sucks but I walked," she beamed at Santana happily and Santana smiled back.

"That's amazing Tash," she squeezed her hand.

"I have my first session with a counsellor tomorrow," Natasha's face fell briefly but then she smiled again, shuffling down into her bed, the task made a whole lot easier by her new, slightly lighter casts. "They said they might take the arm cast off completely in about two weeks. The leg one they're not sure about but they said maybe another four to six weeks. I can't wait!"

"I bet you can't," Santana rolled to face Natasha who had settled on her side, facing her with a pillow supporting her cast leg, her left arm curled up with her hand under her cheek and her right arm with its new purple cast resting on the bed between them. Natasha studied Santana for a moment, frowned and then lifted her right arm, reaching out to stroke Santana's temple gently with her fingers, her cast scratching lightly against Santana's cheek as she did.

"Santana what's going on?" Natasha asked softly, lowering her arm back to the bed.

"Nothing," Santana tried to play it off.

"It's not nothing Santana," Natasha replied half gentle, half exasperated. "I've never seen anyone look as sad as you do right now. It's like…" Natasha thought a moment. "It's like you're sad all the way down to your soul. Like you're so sad it's tearing you up inside." Natasha reached out, brushing Santana's cheek with the back of her left hand. The contact broke Santana's resolve and tears sprang to her eyes.

"She doesn't love me back," she whispered.

"Oh yes she does," Natasha replied immediately. Santana's eyes flicked up to meet bright green, surprised that Natasha already had it figured out.

"She turned me down," Santana's voice went high and tears sprang to her eyes. "She turned me down for a stupid boy!"

"And it's destroying her, Santana. She came here last night, begging for cuddles," Natasha told her. "She curled up and cried herself to sleep. She refuses to talk about it because she doesn't want to out you," she told her.

"Why is she doing this to me?" Santana asked, wiping at her eyes. "She made me tell her everything then she shut me down. She broke my heart!"

"I don't know why, San," Natasha told her. She shifted uncomfortably. "Goddamn it! Can we switch sides?" she asked suddenly. Confused Santana switched sides of the bed with her. Natasha rolled back onto her side, her left hand now free to reach out and touch Santana. "Only Britt knows why she's doing this and she isn't telling."

"Maybe if you tell her that you know she'll tell you and you can tell me?" Santana asked; her voice small. Natasha stared into the brown eyes in front of her and wanted to cry at the soul crushing pain she could see in there.

"I'll try Santana," she promised. Santana leaned back and turned the bedside light off, rolling back to face Natasha.

"I'm sorry I didn't come last night," she whispered into the semi darkness.

"That's ok," Natasha whispered back. Santana's warm hand slipped into Natasha's on the bed between them and they both fell asleep like that; side by side and hand in hand.

Glee!

When Natasha awoke at 7.15 am she was shocked to find Santana sitting next to her, knees hugged to her chest, watching Natasha.

"Hey," the Latina greeted softly.

"Hey," Natasha blinked owlishly up at her, her forehead wrinkled in confusion. "I have to pee." Santana snorted and moved to help Natasha up. "If you help me up and hang onto me then I can walk," Natasha told her.

"Alright," Santana helped Natasha to slide her cast leg off of the bed and pulled her to stand. Natasha's hands were on Santana's shoulders and Santana's hands rested on her hips as Natasha focused on finding her balance. She almost had it when Santana's shoulders began shaking under her hands. She looked up to find the Latina with tears streaming down her cheeks, her lip trembling.

"Hey," Natasha said gently. "Santana what's wrong?" she asked. Santana just shook her head. Natasha took a careful step forward and slid her arms around her friend, hugging her tightly. Santana's arms wound around her, holding her back equally tightly. Santana's face dropped to rest in the crook of Natasha's neck as she cried silently. She cried and cried until she felt Natasha's legs start to wobble and pulled back.

"I'm sorry," she whispered. "I'm a fucking mess."

"Yeah…well…you're _my_ fucking mess so I forgive you," Natasha wiped at Santana's tears, smiling at her. "It'll all turn out ok. You'll see," she told her, leaning close to kiss her cheek. Santana just turned and helped Natasha walk slowly to the bathroom. Once they got back to her room they got dressed before heading out for breakfast.

Glee!

"Hi Natasha," the older, motherly looking woman greeted, a soft smile on her face. "My name is Anna."

"Hi," Natasha said shyly, picking at her arm cast.

"Now just so you know, anything that you say in here, stays in here. This is a safe place for you to express how you're feeling. I know it's awkward but it'll get easier," Anna told her.

"Ok," Natasha replied.

"How about we start this session with you telling me a little about you? About your family. I'm going to write a few things down to help me remember ok?" she told her.

"Ok," Natasha peeked at the woman out of the corner of her eye.

"Ok, well, can you tell me about your family, friends?" Anna asked.

"I live with my mom and my dad, and my younger brother and sister. My older brother is dead," Natasha looked at Anna for a reaction. She got an understanding nod.

"What are your siblings names?"

"Jemimah and Elijah," Natasha replied, pointedly leaving Cameron out.

"I bet they love you," Anna replied.

"I guess," Natasha shrugged.

"How about friends?" Anna asked.

"I'm in Glee Club. They're all my friends," Natasha smiled, thinking about them. Anna asked her questions about them, and Natasha warmed up as she spoke about them all.

"They sound like a lot of fun," Anna grinned. "Are you particularly close with any of them?"

"I guess. Santana, Brittany and Quinn. But right now I think I'm kind of closest to Santana," Natasha replied. "She looks out for me."

"How so?"

"She sleeps at my house every night. She sneaks in after I fall asleep," Natasha told her.

"Why does she do that?" Anna asked, and Natasha noticed the small amount of concern in her eyes.

"She says it's to protect me. But I think she kind of does it for her too. I think I have nightmares," Natasha explained.

"You think you do?" Anna asked.

"I never remember. But sometimes I remember feeling scared and her comforting me," Natasha frowned as she tried to describe it.

"Can we talk about what happened?" Anna asked cautiously. She wanted to push but not too hard.

"I don't remember much," Natasha told her. "Just…the girls and I took Jem to the park. We had an awesome day. But when we pulled into the street we saw Cam's car in the drive. I almost turned around and drove away. I wanted to get Jem away from there so bad but I couldn't leave Mom alone with him." Natasha sucked in a wobbly sigh, she felt the words bubbling up inside her, she hadn't realised how much she needed to vocalise what had happened. She hadn't told anyone yet, too afraid of upsetting them. "So I pulled in. As soon as I opened the front door he swung a baseball bat at me. It hit my knee. He was yelling about us going out without his permission and something about me ratting on him. Then Jemimah started screaming and trying to get between him and me. She was so scared, but she tried to protect me from him. Mom tried to grab her and then he chased her with the bat. Jemimah was trying to get me to go upstairs with her and hide. I managed to get up the stairs. I have no idea how. The pain was awful," Natasha shuddered. "Then my memory gets choppy. It's all bits and pieces," she told Anna. "I remember mom screamed somewhere, then he was back and Jem threw herself over me. He yanked her away by the arm. Then I just remember pain exploding in my leg, then the bat coming at my head and then just pain. Pain everywhere. And then quiet. Just quiet. Then I remember Quinn and Coach Sylvester," Natasha's voice was even and detached, her face scrunched in concentration.

"Coach Sylvester?" Anna asked.

"My old cheer coach," Natasha elaborated.

"They found you?" she asked.

"Jem called them apparently. Well she called Brittany, who was with Quinn and Santana, who called Coach Sylvester and my Glee teacher Mr Schue," Natasha relayed the second hand information she had gotten from her mom.

"What do you remember about them finding you?" Anna pressed.

"Just remember Quinn screamed and Coach held my hand," Natasha shrugged. She felt a wash of emotion as she mentioned Quinn's reaction to seeing her. She couldn't forget the terror she had briefly seen in the blonde's eyes that day.

"Do you remember how you felt through all of this?" Anna asked.

"I just…I…" Natasha stammered a little, trying to put it into words. "I just went numb. And I kept thinking, praying that if he was going to kill me, that he would stop with me, and leave my Mom and Jem alone."

Glee!

Santana was waiting when they got home and she didn't comment when Natasha just wanted to lie on her bed. She kept her back to the Latina as tears dribbled down her cheeks. She hadn't cried in front of Anna but now she couldn't seem to stop. All the feelings she had been pushing down were now clawing their way back to the surface and she felt overwhelmed. Santana's fingers pulling gently through her hair and tickling her back were the only thing keeping her from losing it completely. After a few hours she finally turned to look at Santana who looked about to fall asleep despite it only being 8pm.

"Shouldn't you be going home?" she asked. "Do your parents know where you are?"

"Do you want me to go home?" Santana asked, her dark eyes sad.

"No. Please don't go," Natasha pleaded.

"I'm not going," Santana told her. Natasha looked relieved. She turned and grabbed a lip gloss off of the table beside her. "That smells awesome." Santana commented as Natasha capped the little tube.

"Shortbread cookie. It was Jem's. But I stole it from her. She has like a thousand of them. She hasn't even noticed," Natasha told her. Santana reached over and grabbed the tube.

"And now I'm stealing it from you! Because I wants to eat it," Natasha lunged at her but he casts weighed her down.

"No it's mine! And it doesn't taste good anyway so you don't want to eat it. Give it!" she demanded.

"Nope. Its mine now!" Santana held the tube high out of Natasha's reach and then shrieked as fingers began tickling her ribs, she dropped the tube as she curled away from the maddening tickling.

"Haha! Victory is mine!" Natasha shrieked grabbing the tube and shoving it in her bra victoriously, before flopping onto her back, breathing hard. The room was still a moment, and then the bed moved and Santana was on her stomach, so close to Natasha that her warm breath hit her cheek at every exhale. Natasha's green eyes locked on Santana's dark brown and she saw something lurking there. She had no time to process it before Santana's head ducked and her lips pressed to Natasha's, very, very gently. For a moment, everything was gone, the fear, the sadness…there was just her and Santana. Natasha kissed back out of reflex and within seconds Santana's lips were gone and she had rolled to face away from Natasha, breathing hard.

"I'm sorry," came a tiny whisper.

"Please don't go," Natasha whispered back.

"I won't."

They didn't speak another word that night. Both eventually falling asleep on opposite sides of the bed, a huge gap in between them, and when Natasha awoke in the morning, Santana was gone.

Glee!

**A/N2: **As promisedthis story will be Brittana eventually but there will be a little 'Santasha' in there.


	19. Chapter 18

Appearances

**A/N:** God I was nervous about that last cliff-hanger! I'm so glad you all liked it. Managed to get this one up quicker than expected after scoring a day off after the earth shook big time twice in one afternoon (5.7 and 6.3 magnitude respectively) and half of Christchurch fell down AGAIN! That's the third time in a little over 9 months now! Earthquakes suck! But we are Cantabrians and if nothing else we are resilient. However, I may get even less frequent with updates (I'll try not to) because there's going to be a lot of stress over the next few weeks until things settle down again and that's not conducive to my writing. Please bear with me, I'm not going to abandon this fic now, it's just not my biggest priority under the circumstances.

Smilingmaniacs sure you can link on Facebook ;-) I'm flattered you want to!

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Glee…

Glee!

Santana sighed as she quietly let herself into her house, kicking herself for her moment of weakness last night. She had just been so desperate to forget all of the emotional turmoil and had acted before she had thought it through. She shook her head, trying to forget it had even happened.

"Santana! Thank God! I was starting to think you wouldn't come home," Santana nearly leapt out of her skin as her mother threw her arms around her, hugging her tightly. After her initial fright Santana leaned into her mother, her own arms coming up to hug her back, her head turning to rest against her shoulder.

"I love you Mom," she whispered. Her mother's arms tightened around her and she turned her head to plant a kiss on Santana's hair.

"I love you too Santana," Louisa's voice shook a little as she held her daughter. "No matter what," she added. She pulled back, cupping Santana's cheeks and looking into her eyes. She was relieved to see that some of the pain and most of the fear had receded since the other night. "No matter what," she reiterated. A tiny smile passed across Santana's lips at Louisa's words.

"I thought you'd throw me out," she whispered. "I thought you'd hate me."

"Never," Louisa tucked Santana's hair behind her ear. She averted her eyes briefly before asking. "So you're…" she trailed off, unsure of how to finish.

"I think I'm a lesbian" Santana whispered. "Please don't tell people. I'm not ready for that."

"I won't. And there's nothing wrong with taking the time to figure out who you are. You don't have to label yourself for our sakes," Louisa told her daughter gently.

"Thanks Mami," Santana sighed. Louisa hugged her again, and Santana relaxed into it sighing deeply.

"I've missed you Santana," Louisa admitted softly. They both knew what she meant. She had been working so much the last few years that she had barely seen her daughter and Santana had pulled away and turned into a different person as a result. Where they had once been so close they were now worlds apart, Louisa barely knew who her daughter was anymore. Santana had become rude, obnoxious and distant, sneaking out of the house at night, drinking, shoplifting, getting into fights and sleeping with any boy who offered. Louisa knew it was all to get her attention and she had treated Santana's behaviour like she had her childhood tantrums, studiously ignoring it and hoping that it would stop. But if anything Santana had gotten ruder and more obnoxious, she had gotten in more fights and slept with more boys and she had taken every opportunity to throw it in her mother's face.

"I've missed you too," Santana mumbled back.

Glee!

"Whoo! Look at this!" Puck crowed as Natasha walked slowly into the choir room, hanging onto to Quinn tightly for support. She was getting good now but after a few messy falls she was hesitant to walk without hanging onto someone. "She walks!" he cried out dramatically as the rest of the club erupted into cheers and whoops and Natasha laughed.

"Hell yeah she does," she beamed. Quinn led her toward Santana but Natasha pulled back, moving closer to Tina and Mercedes instead. Quinn frowned but went with it. Once Natasha was seated and chatting to the two girls, Quinn went and sat next to Santana.

"What's going on between you and Tash?" she asked quietly.

"I fucked up," Quinn was taken aback when Santana spilled straight away.

"What did you do?" she asked. Santana dropped her head into her hands, threading her fingers into her hair.

"I…," Santana leaned closer to Quinn. "I kissed her," she whispered.

"Did she get mad?" Quinn asked, unable to get a read on Santana.

"No she…kissed back. It was really good," Santana groaned quietly. "But it got weird."

"It's only weird if you let it get weird. Look at me. I got pregnant by my boyfriend's best friend. It got so weird. But Finn and I made a decision to get past it and we have. We're dating again," Quinn told her. "Talk to Tash." Mr Schue chose that moment to begin the lesson.

"Right, guys we're going to work in pairs today. The assignment is one hit wonders. I want you and your partner to choose a band who had one hit and perform that hit as a duet. I've already paired you up as follows; Rachel and Brittany, Quinn and Lauren, Finn and Artie, Puck and Sam, and Tasha and Santana, Mercedes, Tina and Mike you guys are working as a group - Santana why are you looking at me like that?" Mr Schue cut himself off at the look on the Latinas face. "Do you not want to be paired with Tasha? I thought you guys were friends?"

"Its fine," Santana shook her head, shooting a small smile at the teacher, causing him to take a physical step back.

"Ok…" Mr Schue was still looking at Santana like she had grown a second head, but he continued where he had left off. "You can all go off and start researching your songs in your pairs. On school grounds," he emphasised. "Come to my office and let me know which song you are doing once you've chosen it so I can make sure we don't get double ups!" Everyone jumped up and paired off, all disappearing to work on their songs.

"We should so do 'Tubthumping'," they heard Brittany say as she and Rachel left the room.

"No Brittany," Rachel said in complete exasperation. With their departure that left only Quinn, Lauren, Natasha and Santana in the choir room.

"Wanna hit the library computers Fabray?" Lauren asked, moving to tower over Quinn.

"Uh…ok," Quinn squeaked, she looked relieved to be going somewhere public with the intimidating girl. They grabbed their bags and headed off, leaving Natasha and Santana alone in the choir room. They both stood silently for a few minutes, neither girl able to look at the other.

"Santana-,"

"Tasha-,"

They both began at the same time.

"You go," Natasha giggled.

"Can you go? I actually didn't have anything I was going to say," Santana admitted.

"Ok," Natasha took a deep breath. Then she suddenly took a couple of steps forward, hooking her hand around the back of Santana's neck, pulling her face down and kissing her hard. As soon as she felt Santana respond, Natasha pulled back. "There," she breathed; her voice deliciously raspy. "Now we're even and this can stop being weird," she lifted a hand, brushing her fingers over her own lips. Santana floundered for a few seconds, swallowing convulsively as Natasha backed up and sat down.

"We should sing Nothing Compares 2 U, by Sinead O'Connor," She finally spluttered out.

"Totally!" Natasha agreed enthusiastically. "Let's tell Schue now then we can go somewhere and practice," she smiled at Santana, who smiled back, the awkwardness between them dissipating somewhat.

"Ok," Santana agreed.

Glee!

"That looks totally awesome," Brittany commented around a mouthful of popcorn. Quinn looked up from where she was painting Brittany's toenails, and smiled at the blonde. When Quinn had offered to paint her nails Brittany had produced five bright colours and sweetly requested 'rainbow toes'.

"It totally does B," Natasha replied, shuffling around on Brittany's bed, trying to get comfortable. She shot a smile at Quinn when the girl looked at her in concern. The three of them were lounging in Brittany's room, Natasha and Brittany were sitting side by side against the headboard and Quinn was sitting on the end of the bed, cross legged with Brittany's feet in her lap. "I wish San was here to see them," Brittany said sadly. "I miss her. I miss all of us together."

"Me too," Natasha and Quinn replied in unison.

"Brittany, just so you know, Quinn and I know about you and Santana. You can talk to us. It's ok," Natasha told the blonde. Brittany's eyes widened and then words were spewing out of the blonde so fast that Natasha and Quinn had a hard time keeping up.

"I do love her, I do. I love her with all of my heart. And honestly I don't love Artie that much. I mean I love him as a friend but I don't _love _him love him. I just told San I did because I didn't want to hurt him because I didn't know how to tell her that I want to be with her but that I don't want to be her dirty little secret anymore. I don't want to hide. But until Santana learns to accept herself that's what will happen. I can't do it anymore!" Brittany shuffled closer to Natasha, who lifted an arm to cuddle her close. "It's just easy with Artie," she whispered.

"That's why you did it isn't it?" she asked the blonde.

"Did what?" Brittany asked, confused.

"Made Santana talk about her feelings. You wanted to push her so that she would have to deal with it instead of pushing it all away," Natasha observed. Brittany tucked her face against Natasha's shoulder.

"It sounds all mean when you say it like that," she mumbled.

"Britt, we know you weren't trying to be mean," Quinn said softly, shifting Brittany's feet out of her lap and moving to sit behind her, staring at Natasha over her shoulder. When Natasha caught her eye Quinn mouthed 'tell her' over Brittany's head. Natasha gulped but nodded.

"Britt, please don't be mad at me," Natasha started, causing Brittany to look up at her.

"Why? What did you do?" Brittany asked curiously.

"Santana kissed me…and I kissed her back," Natasha whispered, looking down. "I'm sorry Britt."

"Why would I be mad at you?" Brittany asked, confused. She looked at Quinn who just shrugged and canted her head toward Natasha.

"Because I kissed the girl you love?" Natasha whispered, her own confusion evident as she looked up at Brittany.

"But we aren't dating," Brittany replied, looking at Quinn for help understanding again.

"But you love her," Natasha repeated.

"And I'm with Artie," Brittany replied sadly. Her face became concerned when she saw the mix of fear and confusion in Natasha's face and she reached up to brush the hair out of her eyes. "I'm not mad at you. I never expected Santana to sit around and wait for me," she told Natasha, resting her palm against her friend's cheek. "If you like each other and want to be together then you can. I want her to be happy, even if it's not with me." Natasha's eyes filled with tears at that.

"Brittany you are the most selfless person I know," Natasha told her, her voice trembling a little.

"Can I give you rainbow toes?" Brittany asked randomly, her blue eyes pleading with Natasha to say yes.

"Sure," Natasha giggled.

"Yay!" Brittany beamed, scrabbling to the end of the bed and gently lifting Natasha's feet into her lap. Natasha looked at Quinn, baffled, and the other girl just smiled back and shrugged, mouthing 'Brittany' as an answer to Natasha's silent question.

"Tash you have pretty toes," Brittany commented as she uncapped the purple nail polish and set to work.

Glee!

"Brittany are you ok?" Quinn asked when she got back from dropping Natasha at home. Brittany just shrugged and held out a bottle of purple nail polish, wiggling the fingers of her other hand. Quinn smiled and took the bottle, sitting down next to the taller blonde and pulling her hand to rest on her thigh.

"I feel sad. But it was my choice. I turned her down," she admitted.

"I'm sorry," Quinn said gently, leaning against Brittany for a second. Brittany dropped her head onto Quinn's shoulder as Quinn began painting her fingernails.

"I really do hope she's happy with Tash. I keep trying to tell myself that I hope they're miserable together, but I just can't feel that way," Brittany told her.

"Brittany that just shows how much you love Santana. You love her so much that you're willing to let her go. To be happy with someone else. Natasha was right. You are so selfless. And I know you're hurting right now but Brittany things will work out. One way or another," Quinn told her.

"Thanks Q," Brittany said softly, her voice unsteady. "I love being your friend again."

"I love being friends again too Britt," Quinn replied with a smile.

Glee!

"Santana?" Jemimah asked as she climbed all over the Latina girl sitting in her sister's bed. The little girl settled into the space between the two girls.

"Yes?" Santana asked.

"When I grow up I want to sing like you and Tashie," the little girl beamed up at her, she reached out to put the warm bottle she had just gone to get into her brother's waiting mouth since Natasha couldn't hold it herself with her cast. "How come you're so good?"

"I did lots and lots of lessons and practice," Santana told her.

"Just like you do Jem. If you keep practicing I don't doubt you will be as good as us. Maybe even better…Than me anyway," Natasha told her, shooting a glance at Santana, who blushed.

"I want to sing a song now!" Jemimah leapt up and the bottle fell out of Elijah's mouth. The half-asleep baby shrieked and at Natasha's pleading look Santana shuffled closer, picking up the bottle and holding it in the baby's mouth. Jemimah had shot out of Natasha's room and a few minutes later she came back in with an old toy microphone. "I'm going to sing my favourite song from Aladdin," Jemimah announced. "Tashie will you sing Jasmine for me?" she asked.

"I get to be Jasmine?" Natasha said excitedly, winking at Santana.

"Yeah!" Jemimah replied.

"I'm in!" Natasha told her.

"Cool. I get to start," Jemimah went quiet for a few minutes, seemingly overtaken by shyness. Then she began singing and Santana's jaw dropped. The little girl was _good_.

_I can show you the world  
Shining, shimmering, splendid  
Tell me, princess, now when did  
You last let your heart decide?_

I can open your eyes  
Take you wonder by wonder  
Over, sideways and under  
On a magic carpet ride

A whole new world  
A new fantastic point of view  
No one to tell us no  
Or where to go  
Or say we're only dreaming

Santana turned to look at Natasha as she began to sing her part, pulling the now empty bottle from Elijah's mouth.

_A whole new world  
A dazzling place I never knew  
But when I'm way up here  
It's crystal clear  
that now I'm in a whole new world with you_

Jemimah came in again for a line before Natasha took over again.

_Now I'm in a whole new world with you_

_Unbelievable sights  
Indescribable feeling  
Soaring, tumbling, freewheeling  
Through an endless diamond sky_

Santana laid back, watching in awe as they went back and forward, singing the lines, obviously having done this many times before.

_A whole new world  
Don't you dare close your eyes  
A hundred thousand things to see  
Hold your breath - it gets better  
I'm like a shooting star_  
_I've come so far  
I can't go back to where I used to be  
A whole new world  
__Every turn a surprise  
__With new horizons to pursue  
Every moment gets better  
I'll chase them anywhere  
There's time to spare  
Let me share this whole new world with you_

A whole new world  
A whole new world  
That's where we'll be  
That's where we'll be  
A thrilling chase  
A wondrous place  
For you and me

They finished the last line together and burst into giggles.

"Wow you guys are awesome!" Santana said honestly. "Jem you're very talented!" Santana had had idea that a 7 year old could sing like that. She was quite stunned.

"Thanks," Jemimah was looking at her feet, her cheeks a cute shade of pink. "We sang Elijah to sleep," she giggled pointing to the baby who was now sound asleep against Natasha's chest, she had sat him up to relieve the pressure on her arm. "I'm going to put my mic away!" she took off out of Natasha's room again

"Oh my God that is too cute!" Santana said, smiling at the sight. She grabbed her phone and turned the camera function on. "Oh come on Tasha smile nicely," she said when Natasha stuck out her tongue at the device. Natasha smiled obediently and Santana snapped the photo. When she viewed it she frowned at the screen before glaring at Natasha who was trying not to laugh. "Ok can we do a nice one? Minus the sneaky middle finger this time?" she reached over and slapped the other girl's leg, careful not to disturb the sleeping baby. She deleted the photo then held up the camera again as Elijah let out a cute, sleepy little grunt and yawned, Natasha glanced down lovingly at her brother and Santana took a photo quickly, catching the sweet moment. Natasha didn't notice and looked back up as Santana took another photo.

"Happy?" Natasha ribbed.

"Yes," Santana smiled as she set the first photo as her wallpaper. "Want me to put him to bed for you?"

"Nah. I want to cuddle him for a while," Natasha said, smiling softly.

"Mom says I have to say goodnight and go to bed," Jemimah spoke sullenly from the doorway.

"Aw no fair!" Santana told the little girl.

"I know right?" Jemimah replied in the same sullen voice. Santana had to fight a laugh. Jemimah clambered up onto the bed and threw her arms around Santana. "Night 'Tana," she announced before placing a sloppy, noisy kiss on her cheek.

"Night Jem," Santana giggled.

"Night Tashie," Jemimah carefully hugged and kissed her sister, then her brother before she clambered back over Santana and onto the floor.

"Night Jem," Natasha called after her as she shot out the door. "She's so crazy," Natasha said lovingly.

"She is," Santana laughed.

"So I talked to B at Quinn's tonight," Natasha told her. Santana visibly paled.

"Yeah?" she said, shakily.

"Yeah," Natasha laid down a little further, adjusting Elijah a little.

"Why did she do it?" Santana asked, her heart pounding in her chest.

"She told me that she loves you but she's tired of being your dirty little secret," Natasha told her gently. "She made you tell her how you feel to try to make you deal with your feelings, instead of packing them away in a neat little box like you were before. She wants to be able to love you and have the world know it."

"I'm not ready for that!" Santana whimpered, her eyes wide and terrified.

"That's why she turned you down, she told me she doesn't love Artie like that but that it's easy with him," Natasha told her, her words frank but her tone achingly gentle. She looked away from Santana. "I told her that we kissed."

"Was she angry?" Santana asked.

"No. She said she just wants you to be happy. Even if it's not with her," Natasha repeated the blonde's words. "She loves you that much…and she misses you Santana."

"I miss her too," Santana said, choking up. She rested her head against Natasha's shoulder for a while, watching the soft rise and fall of Elijah's chest as she tried to gather her emotions. After a while she pulled out her phone, opening it she composed a picture message attaching the two photos of Natasha and Elijah and writing a simple message.

_Hey B, How cute is this? – S_

She hit send and closed her phone. Natasha grunted and shifted uncomfortably.

"Hey San can you put Eli in bed for me?" she asked.

"Sure," Santana carefully scooped up the sleeping baby and managed to get him into his crib without waking him. When she got back to Natasha's room she saw that the other girl had fully crashed out in the few minutes she had been gone. Santana gave a soft laugh, shaking her head as she tucked her in, turning off the light and climbing in next to her. She picked up her phone apprehensively, wondering if Brittany would respond. She smiled slightly when she saw she already had a new message from the blonde.

_That is the cutest thing I have ever seen! Thanks for sending it to me San…I miss you :'-( - Britt_

Santana typed out a quick reply.

_No problem…I miss you too Britt :-( – S_

_:-) - Britt_

Santana couldn't help but smile at that. She typed out a quick reply.

_Night B. Sleep tight – S_

_Night San :-) – Britt_

Santana put her phone down on the bedside table and rolled over, a weight lifting at the tiny amount of progress with her best friend. She wriggled closer to Natasha, closing her eyes and letting the other girl's even breathing lull her into sleep.

Glee!

Hope you enjoyed!


	20. Chapter 19

Appearances

**A/N:** A new chapter…I hope you enjoy…

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Glee…

Glee!

"Jesus! Hang on!" Natasha shouted frantically as the doorbell rang. She put Elijah down on the ground awkwardly with her left arm and pushed herself up, hobbling unsteadily to the front door. She peeked through the peephole and saw Karofsky standing on her doorstep.

"Hey," she greeted as she opened the door.

"Hey," he replied, studying her. "Are you ok? You're all flushed and you look stressed out."

"I'm fine," she told him. "Jemimah Grace Isaacs turn the damn stereo off now!" she shouted over her shoulder as music started thumping and a baby started crying from somewhere in the house. "Sorry. Dad cut himself doing God knows what in the garage, so mom had to take him to the emergency room to get stitches and my sister chooses now to be a total pain in my ass!" she ranted, angrily blowing a strand of hair out of her eyes. "What's up?" she smiled sweetly.

"Well, um, I was just coming to give you these," Karofsky handed her her pink iPod headphones, the ones she couldn't for the life of her find when she got home from school that day. "They were on the ground beside your locker and I thought you might be looking for them. Um, I can stay and help you. If you want," he shrugged nervously. He grunted when Natasha threw herself into his arms, hugging him tightly.

"That would be fantastic," she said, incredibly gratefully. Karofsky followed her inside once she had pulled back from him and she led him into the living room. Jemimah hadn't turned the stereo down and was sitting on the couch sulking, her arms folded over her chest while Elijah cried on the floor. Natasha hobbled to the stereo and turned it off, turning around just in time to see Karofsky pick up the crying baby.

"Hey little man," he said to the now curious baby in his arms. "That was a big noise huh?" he said softly. Elijah cooed at him and Karofsky smiled at him.

"Who is he?" Jemimah asked, eyeing Karofsky.

"My friend Dave. Jemimah why acting like this?" Natasha asked tiredly.

"I'm mad at you," Jemimah said darkly.

"Why? What did I do?" Natasha asked confused.

"You were talking to Eli and you weren't listening to me," the child replied.

"Honey I'm sorry but sometimes you have to wait your turn," Natasha scolded lightly.

"I don't like waiting," Jemimah sulked.

"Neither do I but life is full of it. What were you trying to tell me?" Natasha asked, exasperatedly.

"Can we watch Despicable Me?" Jemimah asked.

"If you put your pyjamas on and brush your teeth then you can watch it," Natasha told her.

"Yay!" Jemimah took off into the bedroom.

"What's this little guy's name?" Karofsky asked from where he was sitting on the couch, he had Elijah standing on his knees and the baby was giggling and grabbing at his face.

"Eli," Natasha told him, grinning. "You're good with kids," she told him.

"I have three younger siblings. 13, 7 and 3," he explained.

"Ahhh, "Natasha grinned knowingly. "Brothers? Sisters? Both?"

"I have two sisters and a brother; Sarah, Keeghan and Lacey," Karofsky replied.

"Are you close with them?" Natasha asked, returning the little wave that Eli gave her.

"More with Keegs than the girls," Karofsky shrugged.

"Is he the 7 year old?" Natasha asked curiously.

"Yeah, he'll be eight in two months," Karofsky had relaxed on the couch, calmly playing with Eli as he talked about his family. It was nice, not having to think too hard about what he was saying…it was nice to be able to be himself.

"He's just a little older than Jem," Natasha observed. "We should take them to the park sometime.

"Yeah totally," Karofsky grinned.

"Dave?" Jemimah suddenly asked from the doorway.

"Yes?" he replied, smiling.

"Have you seen Despicable Me?" Jemimah asked, eyeing him warily.

"I have. I took my brother and sister to see it when it was at the movies," he told her.

"My favourites are the minions. What's your favourite?" Jemimah asked as she put the DVD in the player.

"I like Gru. 'Cos he's misunderstood," Karofsky replied quite honestly, glancing at Natasha as he did. Jemimah climbed up on the couch between the two teenagers and looked between them, studying Karofsky intently.

"Dave are you a lesbian like my sister?" she asked frankly. Karofsky paled and then stuttered and stammered as he tried to find an answer.

"Jemimah!" Natasha shrieked. "You can't just ask people stuff like that!"

"Why? There's nothing wrong with being a lesbian. Why can't I ask him if he's a lesbian?" Jemimah interrogated, her tone demanding.

"Because it's rude," Natasha explained patiently. "And sometimes people are uncomfortable with answering. I'm lucky, I have a family who love me whatever I am and whomever I love; but not everyone does. So not everyone is comfortable with answering that question."

"Oh. Dave's Mommy and Daddy don't want him to be a lesbian?" Jemimah asked, confused.

"Gay, Jemimah. A lesbian is a gay girl," Natasha corrected.

"My family don't know," Karofsky suddenly spoke, quietly. Jemimah turned to look at him, her bright green eyes staring searchingly into his.

"That's ok Dave. I'm good at secrets," she answered finally, patting his arm gently.

"How does she know?" Karofsky asked Natasha nervously.

"She has excellent gaydar for a seven year old," Natasha responded drily. "And she listens through my door when I have friends over," Natasha glared pointedly at her sister who suddenly became very interested in finding the remote and starting up the movie. "I'm sorry," Natasha mouthed over her head to Karofsky. He just shrugged in reply, turning his own attention to the TV.

By the time Natasha's parents got home the movie was almost done, Elijah was sprawled across Natasha's chest, asleep, and Jemimah was starting to nod off, leaning against Karofsky's arm. Genevieve took Elijah to put him in his bed and Greg led Jemimah to hers, leaving Natasha to slowly walk Karofsky out.

"Thanks, so much for tonight. And I'm sorry about Jem and her questions," Natasha smiled.

"That's ok," Karofsky said quietly. "See you at school?" he asked.

"See you at school," Natasha echoed, stepping forward and leaning up awkwardly to give him a warm hug.

Glee!

Almost the entire Glee Club was in complete hysterics. Natasha was laughing so hard that at one point if it wasn't for Lauren's quick reflexes behind her she would have ended up in a heap on the floor. She glanced back over her shoulder, smiling her thanks at Lauren before looking over at Quinn and Santana who were both dabbing at their eyes and trying to breathe through their laughter. Even Mr Schue was cracking up. They were performing their one hit wonder duets in Glee and Sam and Puck had insisted on going first. They were currently doing an extremely raucous and hilarious performance of Carl Douglas' 'Kung Fu Fighting', jumping around the room like a pair of idiots. When it was over they ended up standing back where they had started, slapping each other high fives and breathing hard.

"Well that was a very entertaining start to the lesson guys. Well done," Mr Schue said, laughter in his voice. "Right, who's up next?" he asked the group.

"C'mon Fabray, let's show these losers how it's done," Lauren stood up, walking past toward the front of the room, yanking the smaller girl, who squeaked in protest, up by her arm as she passed her. They had chosen to perform 'It's Raining Men' by the Weather Girls. Next up was Rachel and Brittany singing 'Breakfast at Tiffany's' by Deep Blue Something, then Artie and Finn singing Mungo Jerry's 'In the Summertime'.

"Nice work guys!" Mr Schue complimented the two as they headed back to sit with the rest of the club. "Santana and Tasha, you're up." He nodded to them.

"Oh boy," Natasha sighed, awkwardly manoeuvring to her feet and hobbling to the front of the room to stand alongside Santana it was her first performance in weeks and she was actually nervous.

"Oh come on," Santana rolled her eyes playfully. "We're the best singers in this room," she smirked at the others and Rachel huffed and crossed her arms in annoyance. Brittany beamed at them and clapped her hands excitedly. The music started and Natasha took a deep breath as Santana began to sing.

_It's been seven hours and fifteen days  
Since you took your love away  
I go out every night and sleep all day  
Since you took your love away_

Natasha's breath caught when she noticed Santana's eyes kept flickering to Brittany as she sang, but she recovered in time for her lines.

_Since you been gone I can do whatever I want  
I can see whomever I choose  
I can eat my dinner in a fancy restaurant  
But nothing, I said nothing can take away these blues_

As they sang the chorus together Natasha watched Santana as her eyes flickered wildly, always coming back to land on Brittany.

_`Cause nothing compares  
Nothing compares to you_

Santana had the next few lines and Natasha tried to push everything but the music out of her head, trying to lose herself in their performance.

_It's been so lonely without you here  
Like a bird without a song  
Nothing can stop these lonely tears from falling  
Tell me baby where did I go wrong_

Natasha had to fight to keep her voice from shaking as she took over again. Realisation of why Santana had wanted to do this particular song hitting her like a ton of bricks.

_I could put my arms around every boy I see  
But they'd only remind me of you  
I went to the doctor n'guess what he told me_

She was relieved when Santana came in to sing with her, the other girl's strong voice covering the slight tremble in Natasha's.

_Guess what he told me  
He said girl u better try to have fun  
No matter what you'll do  
But he's a fool_

_`Cause nothing compares  
Nothing compares to you_

_all the flowers that you planted, mama  
In the back yard  
All died when you went away  
I know that living with you baby was sometimes hard  
But I'm willing to give it another try_

Brittany cottoned on to the tension coming from Natasha and caught the girl's eyes, trying to figure out what was going on. Natasha averted her eyes though so Brittany watched carefully until she caught the girl's eyes flickering to Santana and turned her head to look at her best friend as they came to the last part of the song. Santana's eyes were darting all around the room, but always falling back on her when she sang the word 'you'.

_Nothing compares  
Nothing compares to you  
Nothing compares  
Nothing compares to you  
Nothing compares  
Nothing compares to you_

Brittany swallowed hard and looked away as they finished, glancing at Natasha. The brunette suddenly looked like she wanted to throw up, or run away, or maybe both.

"Very nice girls, very nice," Mr Schue clapped, smiling proudly at them. As Mercedes, Tina and Mike got up to do their song, 4 Non Blondes' 'What's Up', Brittany shifted to sit next to Natasha, taking her hand in hers and squeezing gently as they watched their friends perform. Brittany shuffled even closer and put an arm around her friend when Natasha stopped looking slightly sick and began to just look sad.

Santana looked over to where Brittany was seemingly comforting Natasha and wondered vaguely what was going on. She had felt the change in Natasha's demeanour while they were singing but she didn't know what was going on with her friend. As soon as Glee was over Natasha and Brittany shot out of the room as fast as Natasha could go. Santana chased after them but just managed to catch sight of their backs disappearing into the lunchtime throng of students. She sighed deeply and waited for Quinn to catch her up before heading to the cafeteria, where Brittany joined them ten minutes later.

Glee!

Natasha sat awkwardly in Anna's office that afternoon. She really just didn't want to be here. She was incredibly thankful for Brittany's intuitiveness after Glee, her whisking her away to meet her Mom before Santana could start questioning her about her mood swing during their song. She just wished her Mom was there to take her home and not to freaking therapy.

"Natasha you seem preoccupied today," Anna said gently as Natasha picked at her cuticles and tried to force her mind to be present.

"I guess," Natasha replied softly.

"You want to talk about it?" Anna offered.

"Things are just complicated…with Santana," Natasha was surprised to find herself wanting to talk about it. To get it out.

"Your friend that sleeps over?" Anna verified. At Natasha's nod she continued. "How has it gotten complicated?"

"Well she's gay. Way in the closet gay. And way in love with her best friend Brittany," Natasha looked cautiously at Anna, seeing only her warm smile and genuine lack of judgement gave her the green light to go ahead. "But Britt doesn't want to be in a relationship she has to hide. So she pushed Santana to tell her how she felt…then turned her down for a boy she doesn't even love."

"Trying to make her deal with her feelings," Anna said, in understanding.

"Yeah. They're both in so much pain…then…," Natasha trailed off, suddenly unsure if she wanted to divulge the rest.

"You can tell me Natasha. It stays between us," Anna reassured her, that same soft, warm smile touching her lips, her eyes still free from any judgement.

"After our last session I was…upset…overwhelmed I guess," Natasha began nervously wriggling in her seat. "She kissed me," she whispered.

"Are you a lesbian?" Anna asked outright.

"Yes," Natasha replied, without hesitation.

"You seem very sure," Anna told her.

"I think I've always known. I've experimented. I dated boys at my last school to keep up my image, to hide what I am. But I like girls," Natasha said defensively.

"I'm not implying anything Natasha. It was just an observation," Anna said gently. "She kissed you. Now it's awkward?"

"It got awkward. Then I kissed her back the next day and we called it even. But…" Natasha trailed off again.

"But you're attracted to her," Anna said, knowingly.

"And you're annoyingly intuitive," Natasha deadpanned.

"Thank you," Anna laughed a little.

"Yeah. I'm attracted to her. I like her a lot," Natasha sighed.

"Natasha I'm going to be brutally honest with you here ok?" Anna said, putting her pen and notes down on the coffee table next to her and placing her glasses on top, turning to face Natasha properly. Natasha nodded, looking slightly alarmed.

"It won't work between the two of you," Anna said gently, reaching out to put her hand on top of Natasha's. "It's not because you're not compatible and I'm not saying it will never work. I barely know you and I don't know Santana at all but what I'm saying is; it won't work right now. You have just been through something hugely traumatic. You both have, in fact. If Santana loves Brittany as much as you say she does then that's not going to go away overnight. She wants to be with you right now because you're not pushing her to go public while she's still trying to come to terms with her own sexuality within herself. You're safe, comforting, she feels in control of things when she's with you. Someone I get the distinct feeling, very much understands what she is going through right now," Anna explained. Natasha nodded, hanging onto her every word. "And Natasha I'm going to take a stab in the dark and say that when you kissed Santana, or when she holds your hand, or hugs you, or smiles at you that you feel safe with her. That it feels like the world can't touch you when you are with her," Natasha was nodding furiously. "She's a distraction for you Natasha, from everything else that's going on for you. From the horrific things your brother did to you and your family," Natasha flinched hard at mention of Cameron. Then, as she absorbed Anna's words, her eyes filled with tears.

"You're right. She doesn't really like me like that. I'm just a placeholder for Brittany," she said sadly. Anna patted her hand gently. "I love being around her. She makes me feel like me again. Like the world isn't slowly collapsing out from under me. She's my safe place too."

"And that's not necessarily a bad thing. But you can't become completely dependent on her which is where I think you are heading right now. It's ok to have a safe place, or a safe person but you can't live there Natasha. You have to deal with reality or it's going to come crashing down around you," Anna explained. "Natasha have you spent a single night alone since you got home from the hospital?" she asked.

"No. The one night Santana wasn't there, Brittany was," Natasha admitted.

"When you think about sleeping alone, how do you feel?" Anna asked. She got her answer when Natasha immediately paled and began to shake.

"I feel terrified," she whispered, her breathing beginning to speed up.

"Natasha take a deep breath," Anna ordered firmly. Natasha complied sucking in lungfuls of air and letting them out slowly.

"What is it about sleeping alone that terrifies you?" Anna asked. Natasha thought for a few minutes.

"There wouldn't be anyone there to keep the bad memories away. Or distract me from thinking about things I'd rather not think about," Natasha eventually told her.

"They can't keep coming over every night forever," Anna told her. "I think maybe it's time to start trying to sleep alone," Anna told her.

"But I don't want to!" Natasha near wailed. In that moment she looked so much like a lost little girl that Anna almost wanted to relent and go easy on her. She knew that it wasn't going to help her in the long run though and so she took a deep breath and pushed on.

"It needs to be gradual Natasha. To slowly get you used to it. Is there a guest bedroom at your house?" she asked. Natasha nodded, her eyes still wide and terrified. "Ok. So how about from tomorrow night, Santana can stay with you until you fall asleep and then she can sleep in the guest bedroom? That way you're not falling asleep alone but you'll get used to not having someone beside you all night and she's still close by if you get scared or upset. Then next time you come here we can talk about how that went and where we can go from there," Anna suggested. Natasha seemed to calm a little at the realisation that this wasn't going to be a sudden, cold-turkey adjustment but more of a gradual weaning process.

"Ok," she agreed softly, her eyes sad.

"I know it's going to be an adjustment, Natasha, but you're strong enough to do this. And it's better to do it now," Anna reassured her. "You'll be ok."

"Maybe," Natasha replied sadly.

Glee!

"Are you awake?" Santana whispered as she quietly slid the window closed.

"Yeah," Natasha replied.

"Are you ok? I know you had therapy today," Santana asked, stripping off and pulling on her pyjamas, frowning when she realised that Natasha's nightlight was off tonight, the room much darker than usual.

"I guess," Natasha replied. Santana paused, about to climb into bed, surprised that she knew the room well enough not to knock into anything in the darkness.

"I'm going to take that as a no," she said, sitting down and shuffling closer, freezing when Natasha shifted away, not letting her touch her. "Whoa, what's wrong? Natasha tell me," Santana tried to move closer again but this time Natasha actively pushed her away. Hard. Santana actually toppled onto her side on the bed from the force of the shove. Her eyes had adjusted now and she could see Natasha fairly clearly through the darkness now, her eyes black and her body trembling in fury.

"Don't," she snarled viciously. Santana almost fell off of the bed she was so shocked. Anger boiled up inside her, but as quickly as it came, it went, replaced by hurt and sadness. In an uncharacteristic move Santana backed away, tears welling in her eyes.

"What did I do?" she asked, her voice barely audible as tears spilled down her cheeks. The bed shook as Natasha suddenly burst into tears her hands flailing in the darkness until one hit against Santana's arm. Natasha pulled at her desperately and Santana hesitated before shifting closer. As soon as she got close enough, Natasha shifted, twisting at the hips to throw her arms around Santana's neck. Santana winced as her cast dropped heavily against her shoulder, the purple outer layer scratching against her skin. She slid her arms around her friend, holding her tightly as she sobbed brokenly into her shoulder. Santana was crying herself as she felt Natasha's head turn and her face press tightly against her neck, tears falling onto her bare skin. She was so absorbed in trying to comfort her that it took her several moments to realise that Natasha was chanting something against her skin. She pulled back a little to try to make the words less muffled. Natasha was murmuring the word sorry over and over. Santana tried to pull her closer again but Natasha pushed her away, gently this time.

"I'm sorry Santana," she sighed. Her breathing beginning to calm.

"What was that about?" Santana asked, her own voice shaky and hoarse from crying.

"I don't, I can't...," Natasha stared before her voice cracked. "I don't know!" she wailed. She felt terrible for her angry outburst, pure fury had overtaken her so fast it almost made her head spin.

"Did I do something?" Santana asked timidly, sniffling a little.

"No! No, I just…I got overwhelmed," Natasha shook her head.

"Did something happen in therapy?" Santana asked, her voice still timid, she very slowly reached out a hand to push damp hair out of Natasha's face, relieved when the other girl allowed the touch.

"She said you have to stop coming over at night," Natasha's lip trembled and her voice shook but she held herself together.

"Why?" Santana burst into tears, much to Natasha's shock.

"She says I can't be dependent on you. That I can't get better if I am," Natasha said, reaching out to hold Santana's hand. "She says you can stay tonight, then we have to start slowly stopping."

"What do you mean 'slowly stopping'?" Santana asked, her voice wobbly as she tried to stop crying.

"First she said that you can still come over but after I fall asleep you have to move to the guestroom. So I get used to being the only one in my bed again. Then next time I see her she'll tell me what comes next," Natasha explained, sounding worn out now.

"Do we have to?" Santana asked, a few stray tears running down her cheeks.

"She's right Santana," Natasha said softly, pulling the hand she was holding into her lap and running her fingers softly up and down the inside of her wrist. "I haven't spent a single night alone since it happened. You've been here every night since I got home from the hospital except for one and that night Brittany was here. I have to learn to sleep alone again Santana. You can't come over every night forever. I love you Santana and I'm so grateful to you for everything but I can't depend on you forever," Natasha said sadly, shifting to rest her head on the taller girl's shoulder. They sat like that a while then Santana slowly shifted from under Natasha's head, pulling her hand free. Natasha watched through the darkness, frozen as Santana came closer again, lifting one leg over Natasha's so that she was hovering over her lap, one knee on either side of her legs. Careful not to put any pressure on her right leg, Santana lowered herself, thanking God and Coach Sylvester for the physical strength to be able to hold herself there. Then carefully, painfully slowly, she leaned forward until her lips pressed against Natasha's. Natasha groaned quietly, knowing that she needed to push her away but wanting so desperately to pull her closer. When Santana's tongue slipped out and brushed her bottom lip Natasha was lost. She opened her mouth, allowing Santana's tongue in to brush against hers, whimpering softly into the other girl's mouth. One hand came up to cup Santana's cheek and pull her closer as the kiss deepened. Santana's hands rested on Natasha's shoulders. Eventually they pulled away, the need for air and the protesting of Santana's leg muscles forcing them to part. Santana shifted back to her side of the bed and they both sat their quietly for a few minutes, catching their breath. Santana suddenly became aware that Natasha was trembling on her side of the bed.

"Are you ok? Tash, I'm sorry," Santana said quickly, wide eyed and nervous.

"I'm ok," Natasha said, her voice distant, the fingers of her left hand lifting to gently brush over her swollen lips.

"Are you sure?" Santana asked hesitantly.

"Yeah," Natasha's voice was stronger now.

"You're being weird," Santana said softly.

"I just…I…I'm trying to figure out which way is up. You are _good _at that," Natasha smiled sheepishly.

"Of course I am. I'm the hottest girl at school," Santana puffed out her chest in mock pride, trying to ease the weirdness.

"Ohhhhhh. So you've had a lot of practice then," Natasha deadpanned.

"You bitch!" Santana spat playfully, reaching over to slap her leg.

"Oh you know I love you and your slutty ways," Natasha teased, patting Santana's arm.

"Careful. I'll give you a taste of how we do it in Lima Heights Adjacent," Santana threatened, throwing an arm around the other girl.

"I could take you. Even with two casts. I'm from Raglan County," Natasha threatened back, copying Santana's earlier action of puffing her chest out in mock pride. She laughed when Santana's answer was cut off by a giant yawn. "Maybe we can settle this in the morning. It's late," she smiled before yawning herself.

"Good plan," Santana smiled, lying down and pulling the blankets up over herself. Natasha lay down too and they were quiet for a few minutes.

"I'm really going to miss this," Natasha said softly.

"Me too. Honestly I think I've needed this as much as you have," Santana replied. "It'll be weird."

"It'll be ok," Natasha said, her voice confident.

"Yeah I guess it will," Santana replied. "Night."

"Night Santana," Natasha replied.

Santana fell asleep quickly that night but Natasha didn't. She was absolutely kicking herself. She should never have let that kiss happen. Not when she knew that whatever was going on between them beyond friendship had to end, for both of their sakes. But she hadn't and once Santana got going she just couldn't bring herself to stop it. She hadn't been lying to Santana when she said she was good. Before she finally fell asleep Natasha made a pact with herself that that was the last time. She wouldn't let it happen again.

Glee!

Hopefully it makes sense and there aren't too many mistakes. It is extremely early in the morning here. I got woken by a quake at 1.30. Nothing to write home about but big enough to shake me awake and I couldn't get back to sleep, so I finished this chapter. It is currently 2.55am. Please let me know if you spot any ridiculous errors or typos and I will edit and repost the chapter. Right now I am posting it as it is because my brain is basically mush now. Other than that I hope you enjoyed it. Night night!


	21. Chapter 20

Appearances

**A/N:** Ok so I'm not a doctor and I don't know much about surgery to put plates in arms so I'm basing this off a guy I went to school with who smashed both bones in his arm skateboarding and had to have both bones plated and screwed back together…Also SORRY, SORRY, SORRY for the delay in getting this one up. I was so ridiculously blocked and had written a frag of this chapter months and months ago and couldn't for the life of me work out how to frame it to get it in here. But I got there, eventually, after much, much writing and rewriting…and swearing…and throwing things…and yelling at the screen like it was the computers fault my brain wasn't cooperating. It's a long one though, a little over 7000 words so hopefully that will make up for the wait a little bit. Sorry!

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Glee…

Glee!

Chapter 20:

Natasha sighed and got up, crossing her room to put a DVD on, hoping it would distract her from her building anxiety. She chose Mean Girls, a movie she must have watched a million times over and still loved. As she pressed the button to close the DVD tray the door to her room opened.

"Hey Tash," Santana said smiling.

"Hey," Natasha smiled back. She stood very still as Santana came closer, leaning down to kiss her softly. After a few seconds they separated and Natasha reached up to wrap her arms around Santana's neck, hugging her tightly. Santana abruptly pulled back, reaching for Natasha's right arm, cradling her forearm gently in both of her hands. She beamed at Natasha when she saw that her cast was gone, replaced by a stocking bandage.

"You got your cast off!" Santana stated the obvious, stroking her fingers over the stretchy cotton bandage.

"I did," Natasha giggled.

"Does it hurt?" Santana asked her.

"A little but not too much. Mostly it hurts when I bend my elbow, which physio says I have to do as much as possible. It feels so light though. And kinda naked," Natasha told her, wriggling her fingers a little. Santana's gentle fingers trailed up to the top of the bandage.

"Are the scars bad?" Santana asked.

"Well…yeah," Natasha admitted, her face falling.

"Can I see?" she asked. Natasha hesitated briefly, frowning.

"Ok. Just be gentle," she finally told her. Santana slowly and very carefully rolled the bandage down her arm. The first scar started about two inches above her elbow and curved down around the outside of the joint, ending about two inches below. Santana's breath caught and a lump rose in her throat at the sight of it. At what would be one of multiple physical reminders of that night, of what she had been through. As Santana rolled the bandage down further she began swallowing convulsively at the sight of the other scar. If she had thought the first one was bad, it had nothing on this one. It was nearly five inches long, it was wide and an angry red, another nasty scar bisected it about an inch and a half above her wrist. It was vicious. Santana stopped rolling the bandage at Natasha's badly scarred wrist. "Impressive huh?" Natasha asked lightly as Santana's index finger traced the skin beside the marks almost lovingly. The Latina didn't respond, she just gently rolled the bandage up and smoothed it back into place. She cradled Natasha's arm gently for a few moments before pulling the smaller girl into a careful hug. Natasha wrapped her arms around Santana's waist gently as she felt the other girl begin to shake against her. Natasha rested her head against her chest, hearing her heartbeat pounding reassuringly next to her ear and sighed. She was supposed to be breaking whatever this was between them off tonight but here, held gently and lovingly in Santana's arms, feeling her cheek against her head and her uneven breaths rustling her hair, she couldn't think of anything she wanted to do less. She reasoned that Santana was pretty upset tonight so maybe now wasn't the best time to break her heart. They held their embrace for the longest time, until it was interrupted by Genevieve walking in.

"Hey girls," she smiled slightly when she locked eyes with her daughter who smiled back from where she was snuggled against Santana's chest. Genevieve's brow furrowed when she registered the pain in Santana's eyes, the dried tear tracks on her cheeks, the way she held Natasha gently, like she might break, but protectively, like she was trying desperately to shield her from the world. Genevieve moved closer reaching out to push the taller girl's hair out of her face. "I was just popping in to say goodnight, and Santana, honey, let me know if you need anything in the guestroom. I put some extra blankets in there for you," she told them. She palmed Santana's cheek, eyeing her worriedly before leaning to kiss Natasha on the cheek.

"Night Mom," Natasha smiled. She frowned when Santana let go of her.

"Night Gen," Santana whispered. "Thanks."

"You're welcome honey," Gen smiled. "Have a good sleep ok. You'll be fine," she told them both. She smiled again before leaving, closing the door behind her, leaving the girls alone.

"What are we watching?" Santana asked quietly.

"Mean Girls," Natasha smiled, making her way over to the bed and lying down. Santana put her pyjamas on and crawled in next to her, picking up the remote and hitting play. "I have to take this off to sleep," Natasha said, gesturing nervously at her bandage. Santana winced but nodded, turning her eyes to the screen as Natasha carefully took off her bandage, rolling it down like Santana had, before pulling it off and dropping it on the bedside table. She rested her oddly naked feeling arm on a pillow that she had propped between herself and Santana, observing how the Latina pointedly kept her eyes locked on the screen, not looking at Natasha's damaged arm. Natasha sighed and pulled the sheet up to cover her arm, so that if she did look down Santana wouldn't have to see it. Then she turned her attention to the movie, mouthing her favourite lines along with the characters. They were about 20 minutes into the movie when Natasha felt the sheet being lifted off of her arm. She kept her eyes on the screen, letting Santana look. Soft fingers trailed lightly over her arm, near but not touching the scars. Out of the corner of her eye Natasha saw Santana's eyes were focussed on her arm. She watched the other girl carefully, keeping her face toward the TV and Santana in her peripheral vision. After a few minutes Santana's stroking fingers traced lightly over the big scar on Natasha's forearm. The sensation gave Natasha chills and she shivered, goose bumps spreading up her arm. Santana yanked her hand back.

"Did I hurt you? I'm sorry," she said immediately.

"No," Natasha laughed a little. "That tickles."

"I don't want to hurt you," Santana whispered.

"I know," Natasha reached over to cup her cheek gently, before removing her hand and turning back to the TV. A little while later she jumped at a light brush on her arm. She looked down and realised that Santana had leaned down and brushed the gentlest of kisses over the spot where the two scars on her forearm intersected. Natasha's breath hitched at the sheer intimacy of the gesture. Santana looked up and caught her eye then leaned down to press another kiss to her elbow scar. Natasha watched with wide eyes as Santana leaned toward her. Their lips met and Natasha sighed against the other girl's mouth, her eyes slipping closed. When Santana's tongue slipped out to touch her bottom lip Natasha suddenly realised that she just couldn't let this go on. She very gently pulled back, her heart aching at the hurt and confusion in the dark, dark eyes in front of her. She smiled slightly before snuggling further into the bed and turning her attention back to the movie. She tried in vain to gather up the courage to talk to Santana, to explain herself, but she just couldn't do it.

Santana stared at the girl beside her, wondering why she had pushed her away like that. She could almost see the cogs turning in Natasha's head as she stared unseeingly at the TV screen, and wondered what the other girl was thinking so hard about. She had a gut feeling that she knew, but she pushed it away, hoping against hope that she was wrong. Santana shook herself lightly before resting her hand over Natasha's and trying to focus on the movie playing, and when she looked over at Natasha again a few minutes later, she realised that the smaller girl had fallen asleep. Santana sighed deeply. This was the part of the night she had been dreading. She got up and turned off the TV and DVD player, deciding that it was best just to get this over with. She crouched down next to Natasha, staring at her sleeping face a moment before stroking her hair and tucking her in. It was one of the hardest things she had ever done in her young life, dragging herself away from the sleeping girl, who had been through so much and who had needed her so badly the past few months…Who she had needed so badly the past few months. Looking at her now, she suddenly seemed so much tinier, so much younger, so much more _vulnerable_ than she ever had before and it caused a lump to rise in Santana's throat. She swallowed hard, cursing her bottom lip as it began to tremble and blinking hard in a vain attempt to keep her tears from falling. She stroked Natasha's cheek one last time before tearing herself away, turning off the light and closing the door behind her.

"OK honey?" a voice asked off to Santana's left. She jumped and whipped around to find Genevieve leaning against the wall, a few feet down the hallway, clearly waiting for her to come out of Natasha's room.

"I'm fine," Santana internally cringed at the waiver in her voice.

"No you're not," Genevieve said lightly, pushing off the wall and stepping toward Santana. "Of course you're not. You've practically been living here since she got home, practically living and breathing _her_. You need her as much as she needs you." Genevieve felt her heart ache at the look on the face of the young girl in front of her. She looked so young, so lost and so vulnerable. Santana looked up and locked eyes with the older woman and in that moment Genevieve could clearly see how traumatised Santana was by everything that had happened and it almost broke her. She stepped forward as Santana's chest began to hitch and carefully wrapped her arms around her. Santana tensed briefly before relaxing into the hug and laying her head on Genevieve's shoulder.

"I feel lost without her," she whispered.

"I bet you do," Genevieve stroked a hand over Santana's dark hair before pulling back. "Come on," she smiled softly and took Santana's hand, leading her to the guestroom. Once inside Genevieve pushed her gently toward the bed and Santana sat nervously on the edge. "Honey, where are your Mom and Dad?" Genevieve asked, sitting next to Santana, who shrugged.

"At home," she replied, picking at her nails.

"Do they know what happened? Where you go at night?" Genevieve probed.

"Yeah. Mom came to the hospital that night. She knows I come here," Santana replied emotionlessly.

"Santana are your parents around much?" Genevieve asked.

"No. They work," Santana used that same emotionless voice again.

"What do they do?" Genevieve noticed the shorter, sharper tone and the monosyllabic answers and hoped the girl wouldn't get angry with her questioning but she needed to know. She knew if the positions had been reversed that she would have never let Natasha go running off to her house every night and get to this point of dependence on someone else's child.

"Dad is a doctor, Mom is a lawyer," Santana replied. She looked Genevieve up and down and sighed deeply. "They work long hours; I have no brothers or sisters, only child. I spend most of my time alone. They think that giving me free run with their credit cards makes up for them not being there much. It doesn't…but they love me. They're there when it counts," she told Genevieve, an edge of defence creeping into her voice at the last sentence.

"Ok," Genevieve smiled a little, her voice pacifying. Santana eyed her warily. "It's getting late and you have school tomorrow. You should try to sleep," she said, backing off and changing the subject. Santana looked down at her hands and sighed.

"I guess," she said softly. "I don't think I'll be able to though," she admitted.

"Oh I think you will," Genevieve said, a knowing smile on her face. "Goodnight Santana," she reached out and palmed the girl's cheek before standing to leave.

"Wait, Gen," Santana called out. When Genevieve turned around she was standing, looking shyly at her feet. "Can I…," Santana started. She swallowed hard. "Can I please have a hug?" she whispered, her voice tiny. Genevieve immediately held out her arms and Santana stepped into them, wrapping her own arms hesitantly around the older woman. Genevieve pulled Santana against her, holding her tight and stroking her hair a little before pulling back.

"You can have a hug whenever you need one," Genevieve told her with a smile.

"Thank you," Santana smiled tentatively back. She climbed into bed as Genevieve left the room, closing the door behind her. As Santana got comfy in her bed she suddenly noticed that one of the pillows didn't match the others. At first she thought it was the pillow from her side of Natasha's bed, but when she pulled it closer she realised that it wasn't, it was Natasha's pillow. She hugged it tightly to her, and rested her head on it. It smelled like Natasha and that was more comforting than Santana would ever let on. She lay, curled around the pillow, for nearly an hour before her eyelids began to flutter and droop and just before sleep claimed her, Genevieve's knowing smile from earlier suddenly made sense. She had put the pillow there to help her sleep. Santana smiled softly to herself and drifted off to sleep.

Glee!

"Hey guys, sorry I'm late-," Mr Schue began. He frowned when no one paid attention to him, they were all crowded around someone and chattering. "What's going on?" Mr Schue asked.

"We're checking out Tasha's war wounds," Puck told him. "She got her arm cast off." The others had moved back and were taking their seats again now. Giving poor Natasha some much needed air. Mr Schue stepped forward and cringed at the sight of the angry marks on the girl's arm.

"Oh Tasha those are vicious," he commented with a grimace.

"I reckon," Natasha agreed. She giggled when Brittany planted a ridiculously over the top kiss on her arm and the blonde beamed back at her, thrilled to have gotten a laugh. Natasha rolled her bandage back up and glanced around the room, looking for Santana. She was sitting alone, at the back of the room, hands folded in her lap and her head down. It unnerved Natasha because it was so unlike the other Latina. Brittany had gently tangled her left hand in Natasha's right though so Natasha decided it would be easier to wait to talk to her after class and ask her what was wrong then.

"Ok your assignment this week is to pick a song that you feel describes another member of Glee Club and we will perform them next week," Mr Schue told them.

"Can we sing about ourselves?" Rachel asked.

"Uh, sure," Mr Schue fought the urge to roll his eyes at the predictably selfish question, which half of his students were already doing.

"Modest much, Manhands?" Santana snarled. Natasha turned her upper body to glare at her friend. Her glare almost became a grimace when she saw Santana's face; her lip was curled back in a vicious sneer aimed at Rachel who squeaked and cowered slightly when she saw it. When Santana caught sight of Natasha and Brittany's identical glares she turned her sneer on them, stunning them both, before dropping her gaze back to her hands where they were folded in her lap. Natasha and Brittany looked at each other worriedly before turning back to face the front.

"That was unnecessary, Santana," Mr Schue scolded lightly. Santana gave no indication that she had even heard him.

"Do we have to tell who we are singing about?" Sam asked.

"Not if you don't want to," Mr Schue told him.

"Can we sing about more than one person?" Natasha asked.

"Sure, I don't see why not," Mr Schue answered her as everyone started talking amongst themselves about the songs they were going to sing.

"I'm totally going to sing about you Tash," Brittany leaned close and whispered in Natasha's ear. Natasha leaned back and smiled a little.

"That's sweet, Britt," she whispered back, leaning over to rest her head on the blondes shoulder. She could almost feel Santana staring daggers into her back. They spent the rest of the lesson until the bell went talking about Nationals and arguing about what they were going to sing. As soon as the bell rang, Santana shot out of her chair and tried to get away, but Natasha was too quick and grabbed her arm as she walked past her.

"Wait, Santana, I need to talk to you," she said gently.

"No. I don't want to," Santana's bottom lip trembled. Everyone else had filtered out by now and with her back to the door, Santana couldn't see Brittany hovering in the doorway.

"Why not?" Natasha asked, reaching out to touch Santana's hand, swallowing hard when the taller girl yanked it away, tucking it safely at her side.

"Because if I talk to you, you're going to break my heart," Santana's voice cracked. She stared searchingly into Natasha's eyes. "Aren't you?" Natasha felt her own heart shatter at the look on Santana's face.

"No," she said softly, trying to keep her own voice steady. "I'm going to break both of our hearts," she lost the battle then, her own voice cracking with emotion. She reached out, taking both of Santana's forearms in her hands, stroking gently with her thumbs. "And it's not because I don't love you Santana. Because I do love you, so much. But you and I both know, we can't keep pretending that this is something other than what it is," Natasha said softly.

"I don't understand," Santana choked out brokenly.

"Yes you do," Natasha smiled slightly. "We're doing this for all of the wrong reasons. You're using me as a substitute for Brittany, and I'm using you as a distraction from the crap-fest that is my life right now. We're both using each other as a safety blanket," Natasha reached up in an attempt to comfort the taller girl. Surprisingly Santana let her tuck her hair back and run the back of her hand along her jaw. Santana's bottom lip trembled and tears spilled from the corners of her eyes. What Natasha was saying was true but this really hurt. No one had ever broken up with Santana before; she never gave them the chance to. Natasha's hand left her face and caught her right wrist, her other hand sliding down her left forearm to capture the left wrist lightly, wary of jolting her own arm. "I'm so sorry I'm hurting you like this. But it's for the best," Natasha whispered.

"You're right," Santana's voice cracked again and she turned her arms gently so that she could slide her hands into Natasha's. "I know you're right. I love you too Tash, but I'm in love with her. I'm in love with her," tears spilled over her cheeks.

"I know," Natasha pulled Santana into her arms, hugging her as her own tears spilled over. Santana didn't speak, she just tucked her face into the crook of Natasha's neck. The two girls stood in each other's arms, crying, until Natasha spotted Brittany watching them, tears running down her pale cheeks. "I have to go now San. I've got Physiotherapy," she whispered. She turned her body to block unwanted eyes and gently lifted Santana's hand, placing a brief kiss on her palm. "I'm sorry. I understand if…," she stopped, choking back a sob. "I understand if you don't want to come over tonight…or anymore," she sobbed. She turned to walk away pausing to whisper back over her shoulder "You know, Santana, in another lifetime you and I would have made an awesome lesbian power couple," she smiled when Santana did then she walked away leaving the taller girl in the empty choir room with a sad little smile and tears on her face. Natasha paused in front of Brittany as she walked away.

"Go Britt. Go take care of her," she whispered brokenly. Brittany looked so torn, obviously wanting to comfort both of her friends. "Go to her. She needs you more," Natasha choked out. She walked away, making a beeline to the bathroom, where she crumpled carefully to the floor in tears, her heart aching.

"Tasha?" a voice sounded, high and frightened. "Are you hurt? What happened? Should I take you to the nurse? What should I do? What do you need?" Rachel rambled hysterically.

"A hug, please?" Natasha sobbed brokenly. Rachel, overwhelmed with relief that Natasha wasn't physically hurt, knelt down beside her, wrapping the crying girl up gently in her arms. She rested her cheek against her head as she felt Natasha embrace her back, holding on tightly. She stroked her back and arms gently, making soft shushing noises until the smaller girl's sobs quieted, her harsh breathing evening out a little.

"What the hell?" Quinn said angrily when she came upon the scene in the bathroom a few minutes later. "What did you do to her?" she glared at Rachel, rushing forward to touch her friend, sending Natasha into fresh sobs.

"I didn't do anything to her!" Rachel said indignantly, hugging Natasha tighter to her. "I found her like this. I don't know what happened."

"Sorry, I…I'm a little protective of her," Quinn apologised, rubbing Natasha's back gently.

"Maybe we should take her home?" Rachel suggested.

"We'll take her to mine. Her house will just remind her," Rachel could see that Quinn already knew what had upset Natasha. The blonde was gently stroking damp strands of dark hair from the crying girl's face. Natasha had calmed again and shot her a grateful, teary smile. The two girls helped Natasha to her feet and led her past her locker to grab her things, then out to Quinn's car. After making sure she was buckled in, Rachel moved to walk away.

"You're coming too," Quinn told her. Folding her arms and trying to look demanding instead of awkward.

"I am?" Rachel asked, disbelieving.

"Get in the car, Berry," Quinn got in the driver's seat and waited until Rachel opened the back door, cautiously climbing in.

Glee!

Back in the choir room after Natasha left, Santana walked robotically over to a corner of the room and slid down to the floor, wrapping her arms around herself and dropping her head onto them, sobbing brokenly. She almost jumped out of her skin at the feel of familiar fingers brushing lightly over the back of her hand. She didn't even realise that she was holding her breath until Brittany spoke from her seat on the floor beside her.

"Santana, honey you have to breathe," Brittany carefully rested her hand between Santana's shoulder blades as the Latina sucked in a couple of choked breaths.

"Don't," Santana hiccupped and tried to shrug the hand off of her back.

"Santana," Brittany pointedly left her hand where it was. "I know that Natasha broke up with you," she said gently. "You need a friend right now. Let me be your friend again." Santana sobbed harder at the blonde's pleading words. Brittany sighed and was trying to think of a new plan when she glanced at Santana. She felt her heart leap at the simple, familiar gesture. The darker girl was in the exact same position as before, but she had shifted her hand ever so slightly, and extended her pinky finger. Brittany reached out and linked her own pinky with it, squeezing tightly, pleased when Santana squeezed back. They sat in silence, pinkies linked, until Santana slowly lifted her head and leaned over to lay it against Brittany's shoulder, sniffling softly.

"Hey," Brittany said softly, swapping one pinky finger for the other and gently laying an arm across Santana's shoulders.

"Hey," came the quiet, hoarse reply. Santana turned her head slightly so that her cheek pressed against Brittany's bare shoulder, her cool skin soothing against Santana's overheated face. Brittany dropped her head to rest her cheek against the top of Santana's head.

"Wanna get ice cream? I'll get you mint chocolate chip," Brittany asked, trying to tempt Santana with her favourite treat.

"With chocolate syrup?" Santana asked, her voice still small but steadier.

"With anything you want," Brittany told her, a smile lighting her lips.

"Good. Cos' I wants to get my chocolate syrup on." Santana announced and Brittany could hear the hint of a smile in her voice. "But you better be ready to run all that sugar off with me in the morning."

"Absolutely. What are friends for?" Brittany asked, pulling Santana tighter against her with the arm over her shoulders.

"Ok," Santana agreed, lifting her head. She smiled slightly at Brittany who positively beamed back at her. The blonde stood up, tugging Santana with her by her pinky before hauling the shorter girl into a tight hug.

"I miss you," she whispered, before pulling back, smiling and tugging at Santana's hand, leading her out of the choir room.

Glee!

"Wow," Rachel commented as she stepped into Quinn's bedroom. It was huge and beautifully decorated. She almost dropped Natasha as she tried to drink it all in.

"It's just a room Berry," Quinn muttered self consciously.

"It's gorgeous," Rachel replied, smiling warmly at the blonde as they set the now eerily silent brunette down on the bed. Natasha awkwardly crawled up the bed, one armed and dragging her cast leg, so that she was on the bed properly, her head on Quinn's pillow. Quinn pulled Natasha's shoe off before tucking her up in the big fluffy blanket that sat at the end of the bed.

"What happened?" Quinn asked softly, she lay down behind her friend, draping an arm over her. Rachel awkwardly shifted closer, taking one of Natasha's hands in both of hers.

"I broke up with Santana," Natasha all but wailed, bursting into tears. Quinn snapped her eyes to Rachel's, which were slightly surprised but the brunette didn't ask questions or comment like Quinn expected her to, she just gripped Natasha's hand tighter, stroking the back with her thumb.

"Sweetie I'm sorry," Quinn sighed, hugging Natasha tighter.

"I did the right thing Quinn. She doesn't love me. She loves Britt and I can't compete with that!" Natasha choked out between sobs. Quinn's eyes went to Rachel's, this time finding no trace of surprise in the brown orbs. "I never should have let it get to this! I'm so stupid," Natasha sobbed angrily.

"You're not stupid Natasha-," Rachel began.

"I am! I put my heart out there, knowing it was going to get trampled all over! That's stupid! Who does that?" Natasha interrupted.

"Hey, shut up a minute and listen to me," Rachel scolded, causing Quinn's eyebrows to lift almost to her hairline. Natasha closed her mouth, her eyes lifting to Rachel's. "You are not stupid. You've been through so much the last year, well your whole life really but that doesn't really pertain to what I'm about to say so -,"

"Rachel! Point!" Quinn prompted, exasperated.

"Right. You've been through so much in the last year, and you found someone who made you feel happy and whole, and safe, and comforted. It's only natural that you would want to feel that way, even if on some level you knew that it would end like this. It doesn't make you stupid, Tasha, it makes you human. And with all that Santana has been going through recently with Brittany, I'm sure you made her feel that way too," Rachel told her. Quinn lifted her head and looked at Rachel somewhat astonished by her insight. Maybe the girl hadn't been lying when she said she had a sixth sense. Natasha looked at her searchingly then rolled over to face Quinn and buried her face against her shoulder, nuzzling in close. Quinn hesitated before wrapping her arms around her friend, holding her tightly. Rachel shifted further up the bed, stroking Natasha's hair and singing softly until Natasha's breathing evened out. When she was sure the girl between them was asleep, she sat on the edge of the bed and looked at Quinn. "You know, don't have to be afraid of her Quinn. She doesn't like you like that. She just likes physical contact," she stated boldly. "I'm not saying she doesn't think that you're beautiful because you are and anyone would have to be blind not to see that," She added hastily at the look Quinn gave her. Quinn looked down, embarrassed both by the complement and the fact that Rachel had seen her hesitate when Natasha had cuddled into her and called her out on it.

"I didn't mean to do that," she said softly. "It's not that I have a problem with her being gay, because I absolutely don't. It's just…," Quinn trailed off, quickly dropping her face and staring at the bed. She wasn't quick enough though and Rachel caught sight of the shame in her eyes.

"What?" Rachel asked gently. "You can tell me y'know."

"It was just a kneejerk reaction. My father drilled into me for a lot of years that gay people are bad and sinful. He's my father, of course I believed him, completely. It wasn't until I joined Glee and got to know Kurt that I started questioning what he instilled in me," Quinn told her softly. "I don't think there's anything wrong with it anymore," she added quickly, averting her eyes again, unnerved by the surprisingly honest moment they were sharing.

"I understand," Rachel said honestly. She smiled at Quinn as though she was proud of her. They both went quiet for a while, the silence quickly becoming awkward. "I guess I should be going, now that Tasha's ok. Can you let me know if she's staying here or going home tonight? I'd like to bring her some homemade chocolate chip cookies to cheer her up," she told Quinn.

"Uh yeah, sure," Quinn told her. "Do, uh, do you need a ride?" she asked.

"Oh I'm only a few blocks from here. I'll just walk, Thanks, though," Rachel smiled, picking up her bag. Quinn stood and walked her to the front door to let her out. "Bye Quinn. Tell Tasha I said goodbye?" Rachel said brightly.

"I will. Uh, Bye Rachel," Quinn replied awkwardly before heading back inside. She stopped at the fridge to grab a couple of bottles of water, then headed back to her room. Natasha was awake and sitting up, waiting for her. "Rachel said Goodbye," Quinn told her, handing her a bottle of water.

"Thanks. Do you have any aspirin? I have a headache," Natasha asked quietly. Quinn reached into her bedside table and produced a bottle of pills. Natasha took two and handed the bottle back. "Thanks," she said again.

"How are you doing?" Quinn asked tenderly, brushing Natasha's hair out of her eyes.

"This really, really sucks, Quinn," Natasha replied, her voice wobbling. "I hope she's ok. I really hurt her," her voice cracked then.

"She'll be ok," Quinn assured her, putting an arm around her. "You both will. I promise."

Glee!

Natasha sat in her recliner chair, slowly eating a cookie and watching the window instead of the movie playing on her TV. She didn't expect her to come but she couldn't help but hope. She had sent Brittany a text earlier, asking if Santana was ok. She had gotten a reply immediately: _She's stuffing her face with ice cream and being very rude to the lady at the counter. She's sad but she's ok. Don't worry, be happy Tash! - Love B._ Natasha couldn't help the little smile that crossed her lips as she recalled Brittany's sweet words. She was so lost in thought that she didn't hear the door open.

"Hey," came a soft voice. Natasha jumped and whipped her head around toward the sound.

"Hey Tash!" Brittany said excitedly.

"Hey," Natasha smiled briefly at Brittany before her eyes fell on Santana, who was shifting nervously, her dark eyes incredibly sad. Brittany, oblivious to the almost palpable tension in the room, bounced happily over to the smaller girl and leaned over to plant a kiss on her forehead.

"I just came to drop San off, I have to get home before curfew so I don't get grounded," Brittany pouted and Natasha tried to look as sympathetic as possible. Brittany beamed at her effort and leaned over to kiss her head again. "Night night Tasha, sweet dreams! I'll see you at school tomorrow," Brittany called over her shoulder as she left. As she passed Santana she paused briefly to grab the shorter girls hand and kiss the back of it gently. She whispered something to her but Natasha was too far away to hear what it was. She wasn't too far away to see how it affected Santana though. The pain in her eyes deepened considerably and she began to swallow convulsively. Brittany left with a last wave, and the tension got thicker without Brittany as a buffer.

"I didn't think you'd come," Natasha said softly, staring at her hands.

"I wasn't sure I was going to come," Santana replied, stepping further into the room and sitting cautiously on the edge of the bed.

"So why did you?" Natasha asked.

"Because I may not be _in love_ with you, but I do love you Tash. I couldn't stay away," Santana said softly, her hair falling in a curtain, shielding her face from view. Natasha had never seen the girl look so timid. She hauled herself to her feet and slowly made her way over to her friend. She could see Santana get more and more tense with each step she took toward her. When she reached her, both girls sucked in deep shaky breaths. Natasha reached out, tucking glossy black hair behind Santana's ear.

"Look at me," Natasha ordered softly. Santana looked up but her eyes focussed just off to the left of Natasha's head. "Look at _me_," Natasha repeated, hooking her fingertips under Santana's chin and turning her head toward her. Dark brown eyes finally met bright green. "I love you too, Santana. I don't want to lose you as a friend over this. Can we try to get past this? Please?" she pleaded. Her eyes filled with tears, her lip trembled and Santana's heart nearly shattered into a thousand pieces. She stood and slowly pulled the shorter girl into a hug, holding her tightly, tears running down her face and falling into the dark hair beneath her cheek. Natasha hugged back and Santana could feel her body begin to shake in her arms.

"I don't want to lose you either," Santana managed to choke out brokenly. Natasha just hugged her tighter, pushing up on tiptoes to bury her face in the crook of Santana's neck. They held their embrace for the longest time, until Natasha had to pull back, her left foot aching from holding all of her weight for so long and her right arm aching from the position she had been holding it in. They separated slowly, awkwardness settling back in. Natasha groaned in pain as she hobbled over to her bed and sat down. "I'm sorry, did I hurt you?" Santana asked worriedly.

"No, no. Just stiff from standing like that for so long," Natasha said, wincing slightly as she slowly and carefully straightened and then bent her elbow as much as she could, which still wasn't much.

"This is so awkward," Santana sighed.

"I know," Natasha said, flopping back onto the bed. "I guess we just have to keep working at it 'til it isn't."

"Yeah I guess so. God if it's this awkward after a couple of kisses, I'm really glad we never had sex," Santana stated outright. Natasha threw her head back and laughed until tears ran down her cheeks and she was gasping for air. Santana couldn't help but laugh with her and it felt good.

"Oh God," Natasha gasped as she wiped her eyes and tried to catch her breath. She grinned at Santana who grinned back and both girls were relieved to feel some of the awkwardness slip away. Santana reached over to brush away an errant tear and Natasha giggled at the gesture.

"So what movie are we falling asleep to tonight?" Santana asked.

"I don't know. You pick," Natasha told her. "Something funny would be awesome but whatever you want is fine." Santana scanned over the titles in the rack, eventually settling on Bruce Almighty, which she hadn't seen in years.

"You have Berry cookies!" Santana exclaimed when she went to put the DVD in and saw the bright pink box on top of the player. She turned to Natasha, her eyes alight and pleading.

"You can have some," Natasha giggled as Santana whipped around and grabbed a cookie, shoving it all into her mouth at once. "Santana Isabella Lopez! That is so impolite! You're as bad as Elijah!" she scolded, doing her best imitation of her own mother and trying not to laugh.

"Bite me," Santana mumbled around a mouthful of cookie.

"You're gross, Santana, just gross. Put the damn DVD on," Natasha couldn't help the smile that escaped at the last second.

"You love me anyway," Santana said, having swallowed most of her cookie already.

"Yes I do. But I will slap you upside the head if you keep eating like a pig," Natasha informed her, channelling Rachel's haughtiness.

"What did you do to deserve Berry cookies anyway?" Santana moved to sit on the bed, as close to the edge as possible, so there'd be a wide gap between her and Natasha. Natasha still hadn't moved from the end of the bed and they both looked away as awkwardness settled in again.

"She and Quinn took me home from school. She, uh, made them to cheer me up," Natasha glanced at Santana, then looked away as she gave the short answer, leaving out the bit where she had sobbed like a baby on Quinn's bed for God knew how long.

"Nice of her," Santana commented awkwardly.

"Yeah. I uh, I have to brush my teeth and stuff. You can start the movie without me if you like," Natasha stood up and hobbled to the bathroom. When she came back she saw that Santana had waited for her to come back to start the DVD. The taller girl hit play as Natasha crawled under the covers, right on the edge of the bed, facing away from Santana. Santana had chosen to stay on top of the blankets, feeling like it would just be far too familiar, far too intimate to climb into the bed like she usually did. They didn't speak another word and Natasha fell asleep about halfway through the movie. Santana watched it until the end before standing up, stretching her tense muscles and moving to turn the TV and DVD player off. She headed for the door and then stopped, moving back to kneel next to Natasha, staring at her sleeping face. She reached out a hand and rested it gently against her warm cheek.

"We'll be okay Tasha," she whispered softly. "I promise," she leaned in, gently brushing her lips across Natasha's forehead. She tucked the blankets tighter around the sleeping girl before heading to her room. She found Genevieve waiting for her in the hallway again.

"Night honey," Genevieve smiled. "You know where I am if you need anything."

"Yeah I do," Santana smiled slightly. Genevieve held out her arms and Santana stepped into them. Genevieve hugged her tightly for a moment, placing an impulsive kiss on the top of her head, before pulling away. "Night Gen," Santana smiled before heading to the bathroom to brush her teeth and wash her face. She walked into the guestroom and frowned when she saw a pink box with a purple ribbon sitting on her bed. She walked over and picked it up, pulling an envelope from under the ribbon. Her name was written in Rachel Berry's familiar loopy scrawl on the front. Why would Berry make her cookies though? She opened the envelope and pulled out a piece of paper.

_Dear Santana,_

_I know that you are hurting right now and I thought that some of my cookies would cheer you up. I know that you like them. I also know that you dislike me intensely but I just wanted to inform you that if you need someone to talk to; that you know where I live (I know that you know where I live because you used to hand deliver insulting letters to me on your way home from school. I saw you.) and that you are welcome any time. Please don't kill me for this._

_Sincerely,_

_Rachel Berry_

There was one of Rachel's trademark gold star stickers next to her name. Santana was stunned and a little touched by the gesture. Most people had come to the conclusion that she didn't have feelings and so they never went out of their way to acknowledge them. Santana placed the letter back in the envelope and put it, along with the box of cookies, on the nightstand before climbing into bed. Natasha's pillow was still there and the familiar smell made a lump rise in Santana's throat and tears well in her eyes as the hurt rose up all over again. She sat up and threw the pillow as hard as she could at the wall, a sob escaping her with the effort. She laid back down, pulling another pillow to her, sobbing brokenly into it until she finally cried herself into an exhausted, dreamless sleep.

Glee!

Sorry again for the huge delay in getting this up! Thank you for your patience and thanks for reading. I hope it was worth it!


	22. Chapter 21

Appearances

**A/N:** New chapter finally. A bit from the Moms' side, a lot of vulnerable!Santana struggling with the weight of everything she's dealing with now and some older issues, and more...enjoy! Also, I'm watching my new favourite movie Burlesque as I write. Hence the references haha. And the tiny little bit of messing with the universes, I just couldn't resist it!

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Glee…Or Burlesque, the only parts of this that are mine are Natasha and Family.

Glee!

Chapter 21:

_There will be no fade-out,_

_This is not the end,_

_I'm down now but I'll be standin' tall again,_

_Times are hard but, _

_I was built tough,_

_I'm gonna show you all what I'm made of!_

Louisa and Genevieve laughed as their daughters belted out the song along with Cher on the screen, Genevieve doubled over as the chorus started and Santana had to reach out and steady Natasha for about the tenth time when she went for the power note and lost her balance as she tried to widen her stance. Jemimah, who had come out just for this song, desperately tried to keep up, mumbling through the verses then trying to belt out the chorus, the only part of the song the little girl knew. When the song finished the three girls flopped onto the couch giggling wildly.

"Beautiful, girls," Louisa laughed and she and Genevieve applauded the performance.

"That's my favourite song in the movie," Natasha commented, as she curled into Santana slightly, leaning her head against her shoulder.

"Girls you're squashing poor Santana," Genevieve laughed as Jemimah snuggled into the Latina on the other side, practically on top of her.

"We're making a Santana sandwich!" Jemimah informed her mother, and then giggled at her own joke.

"I can see that," Genevieve rolled her eyes before turning her attention back to the movie. It had been nearly two weeks since Natasha had broken up with Santana and after a few days, the awkwardness had surprisingly let up and they had, for the most part, returned to their easy camaraderie. Seeing this Genevieve had decided that a girls' night was in order and had invited Santana and her Mom over for dinner and a movie, in the hopes of getting to know the older Lopez. The girls had picked Burlesque to watch and they were more entertaining than the film.

"God Cam Gigandet is so hot," Natasha commented randomly to Santana, who giggled.

"Total man-candy," she agreed.

"Tashie I thought lesbians didn't like boys?" Jemimah said, staring at her sister in confusion.

"Uh…," Natasha floundered, trying to think of a G-Rated answer to give her little sister.

"Doesn't mean we don't think that boys can be pretty. He is a very pretty boy," Santana supplied casually, her nails sinking into Natasha's arm. This was the first time since she came out that she had talked about this kind of thing in front of her mother.

"Exactly," Natasha smiled. She glanced at the screen while discreetly prising Santana's sharp nails out of her skin and giving her hand a squeeze. "Uh Mom?" she called Genevieve's attention. "Might want to put the small one back to bed before the pretty boy gets his mack on with his pretty roommate," she said pointedly, slightly mimicking Santana's gangsta speak. She caught Louisa's eye roll.

"Oh lord Natasha don't you start that gangsta speak," she grumbled as Genevieve paused the movie while she took her younger daughter back to bed.

"This is how you gots ta speak if you wants the respect of the masses…or to puts the fear into them," Santana informed her mother, throwing her shoulders back, her chest out and tilting her chin up, adding the attitude to the words.

"Stop it," Louisa warned, her lips lifting at the corners slightly.

"Never. Me and Tashie gots our reputations to uphold," Santana slung an arm around the smaller girl, her dark eyes challenging her mother. "We da badass bitches from the wrong side of the tracks!"

"Santana we live in the richest neighbourhood in town. And this one is pretty nice too," Louisa pointed out.

"Oh Mom. You're so old," Santana rolled her eyes, exasperation lacing her voice.

"Hey!" Louisa yelped indignantly.

"Well you are," Santana turned her head resolutely to look at the frozen TV screen as her mother glared at her. In that moment Natasha discovered exactly where Santana had learned her death glare. Genevieve came back in then and hit play. When the movie was done the two girls shot off to Natasha's room giggling, and saying something about texting Quinn to tell her that they thought the angry, bitchy girlfriend character looked like her, leaving their mothers alone in the lounge.

"They're very close," Louisa commented.

"Yeah they are, abnormally so, given everything," Genevieve replied.

"What do you mean?" Louisa frowned.

"They had a brief 'thing' with each other," Genevieve frowned back. "You didn't know?"

"Santana doesn't exactly talk to me about her life, or anything else, anymore," Louisa replied sadly. "She only told me she was gay by accident."

"I'm sorry. I swear teenage girls are from another planet," Genevieve said softly.

"You seem to get on ok with yours," Louisa told her.

"We do now…on the surface anyway," Genevieve sighed. "She doesn't talk to me about much either. She talks to Santana. Or Brittany, Or Quinn. I get left in the cold. But I expected as much after everything."

"I'm sorry," Louisa said awkwardly, not knowing what to say to that.

"I've uh…been meaning to get hold of you recently. To talk to you a little bit about Santana," Genevieve said nervously.

"What about Santana?" Louisa asked.

"I'm…I'm a little worried about her. She's become incredibly dependent on Natasha. I think…I mean…Is she in any therapy? After what happened?" she asked hesitantly. Louisa glared and Genevieve put her hands up. "I'm not questioning your parenting Louisa, believe me. It's much harder to see it when it's your own child. God knows _I_ know that. I couldn't see it with my son and look where that got me," she ran her fingers over her own badly scarred arm. "I just think it might help. I know that Brittany and Quinn have been seeing people; I got that much out of Quinn last time she was over here."

"You think Santana isn't coping?" Louisa asked, she averted her eyes, ashamed that she hadn't thought to talk to Santana about seeing a therapist. "She seems to be doing ok."

"I think she's using Natasha as a crutch to cope. And I know Natasha is using Santana to cope. Natasha's therapist is trying to teach her to be less dependent on other people and to cope by herself and she's getting better, but I think Santana may be struggling a lot more with it," Genevieve told her.

"I just…I didn't know," Louisa said softly.

"After what they saw that night I think she needs to unload it all on someone who can help her to learn to cope with it instead of distract herself from it," Genevieve said gently.

"I don't even know what happened really. Just that your son lost it and beat you all up," Louisa said. "I don't know how the girls ended up in the middle of it."

"They had taken Jem to the park that morning. Jem adores Santana, Quinn and Brittany. He lost it when he came home early and they weren't there. He didn't like them going anywhere without his permission and he never would have let them go to the park with other people. He attacked Tash and then me and Jem when we tried to defend her. After he finally left Jem found Tasha's phone and rang Brittany, pleading for her to help because Natasha was bleeding and she couldn't wake her. The girls had the presence of mind to call two teachers to meet them there," Genevieve explained briefly, her hands shaking a little where she held them clasped in her lap. "Tash…Tash was in a very bad way. It was traumatic enough seeing her after they had patched her up. I can't imagine what it must have been like to find her like that."

"I'll talk to Santana. I'll try and get her to talk to someone," Louisa said after a minute or two of silence, staring at her hands. "I'm not a very good Mom," she said, so sad and defeated that it almost broke Genevieve's heart. "I love being a lawyer. I mean, I took nearly fourteen years off after Tana was born to raise her, and I loved being there for her and raising her, I really did. I used to love writing music and I even got back into that for a while, but then I just got bored of being a stay-at-home-Mom, when Tana was there it was fine but when she wasn't I was just so _lonely _and I _missed _being a lawyer. So I went back full time. I figured she wouldn't miss me that much, I mean she spent all of her time with Brittany anyway. Then the hours got longer and she started rebelling. She got rude and obnoxious at home, I started getting calls that she was shoplifting, fighting at school, and then she got arrested when she was fifteen for stealing her father's car. Well, she didn't get arrested for the car, she actually got arrested for kicking the cop who pulled her over in the cojones and trying to run away when she realised she was in deep shit," Louisa shook her head. "She started having sex with every boy who offered and then throwing it in my face. I just kept giving her money, ignoring her behaviour and hoping it would go away," Louisa trailed off, realising that she was sitting here venting to a woman she barely knew about her inadequacies as a mother. "I'm sorry," she said sheepishly.

"Hey, I'm sure any mother could sit here and make a list of things they feel like they did wrong as a parent. It's hard to raise kids. I mean my son was fighting, stealing and doing drugs and had huge anger management issues and I just buried my head and hoped it would go away, that he would grow out of it. I buried my head in the sand and before I knew it the situation was totally out of control and there was nothing I could do. That's why I brought this up. Santana is an amazing girl; she's sweet, funny, beautiful and an amazing friend to Tasha. She's fiercely protective of the people she loves. But she's on a slippery slope. She needs your attention and she needs you to be a mother to her and to do what's best for her. Don't ask her if she wants to see the therapist, she'll say no way. No one _wants_ to go to therapy. Tell her she needs to go, make the appointment. Offer to go with her. Drag her kicking and screaming if you have to. You still have a chance to turn this all around Louisa. Don't let it get away from you," Genevieve finished passionately, her eyes pleading with Louisa.

"Yes," Louisa nodded; new resolve lighting in her eyes. "You're right. I can't…I can't let her get any further away from me. How did you get so wise about all of this?" Louisa asked, unthinking.

"Hindsight is a bitch," Genevieve deadpanned and the other woman paled.

"Shit, I'm sorry," she said, humiliated that she had said that.

"Don't be," Genevieve sighed and then smiled bravely. "If I can use the shit I went through to help others avoid the same or similar situations then maybe I can feel like I went through it all for a reason."

"You are one tough lady. Badass as my daughter would so eloquently put it," Louisa smiled. "Speaking of my daughter, do you have any idea when she might start sleeping in her own bed again?" she asked.

"They're working on that. They're starting small and pacing themselves. First it was get Santana out of the room after Tash was asleep, now it's get her out of the room before Tash falls asleep. I think the next step will be to get Santana in her own bed, but that will be a few weeks down the track I think," Genevieve told her.

"Right, I should know this. I should be supporting her through this," Louisa said determinedly.

"I'll keep you informed in case she doesn't," Genevieve smiled. "We'll work as a team. Get these kids happy and healthy and back on track. God knows I need someone to vent at," Genevieve eyed Louisa up and down.

"Do you know anyone else in town?" Louisa asked, out of curiosity.

"Not really. Just Will Schuester and Sue Sylvester. They've both visited a few times to check up on me. Will is clueless, but he's nice enough and Sue, Sue is just…frightening," Genevieve shuddered a little.

"I do not know how those cheerleaders don't all have nervous breakdowns," Louisa said in agreement. "But more than that I don't know how 'Tana and Q actually seem to thrive under her. Or how Britt doesn't have a total mental collapse, she's too sweet to withstand the kind of insults that woman comes out with."

"That last one I think I can answer. I once heard Natasha say that even Sue Sylvester respects McKinley High's cardinal rule: You don't make Brittany Pierce cry. That and I think that most of Sue's insults are a little too…uh…complicated, for Britt to decipher," Genevieve said as delicately as she could.

"Well that's true. Y'know, we should have a ladies night one night, I'll invite Helen Pierce and Judy Fabray even, I actually heard from someone the other day that she's sober now," Louisa suggested.

"That sounds really great. Cam-," Genevieve stopped, sucking in a deep calming breath. "_He_ never let me do anything like that. He was afraid I'd spill, I think. I haven't had friends in years." Louisa smiled compassionately, reaching out to squeeze the other woman's hand gently.

"That I can help you with," she smiled again.

Glee!

Natasha and Santana crept quietly back to Natasha's room from where they had been listening to their mothers at the lounge door. They sat silently on the bed a few moments before Santana spoke, her voice trembling and sad.

"Wow. I had no idea my Mom felt like that. I thought she just didn't care," a tear made its way down her cheek and Natasha wiped it away absently.

"I had no idea my Mom was so perceptive," she shook her head lightly.

"I thought she didn't love me," Santana continued, not hearing Natasha's words. "I thought she got sick of me and didn't want me anymore and that that was why she went back to work and was never there. I thought she didn't want me," Santana suddenly burst into tears, throwing herself at Natasha and sobbing into the front of her shirt. Natasha wrapped her arms around her friend, a little bewildered at the turn of events. She was contemplating how to comfort the girl when she pulled back a bit. "I want to talk to her. I want…," Santana burst into tears again.

"Do you want me to get her?" Natasha asked.

"No," Santana choked out, trying desperately to suck in a deep breath and calm herself. After a few minutes she had herself back under control, it was tentative control at best, but she could speak at least. "No, not tonight. I need to process right now."

"You thought she didn't want you?" Natasha asked, wonder in her voice, her hands rising to cup Santana's cheeks.

"Yeah," Santana averted her eyes, trying to turn her face, only to have it pulled back by Natasha's gentle hands. The other girl stared at her for a long time, her mouth opened as if to speak a few times but then she closed it, as if words had failed her. Eventually she gave up on words, settling on tugging Santana close to her and holding her tightly. They were still in that position about forty minutes later when Louisa came in to say goodnight. Santana had calmed and was playing absently with Natasha's bracelet, while the shorter girl told her filthy jokes to make her feel better.

"Hey, you two, can I come in?" she asked, smiling.

"Sure," Natasha smiled back.

"Hey Mami," Santana said, sitting up and hoping she didn't look like she had been crying.

"I'm calling it a night and heading home now. I just came to say goodnight," Louisa smiled at her daughter. "Hey, tomorrow is Saturday. How about I take you out to lunch? We can do some shopping? Mother, daughter day?" she asked, stepping forward to smooth Santana's dark hair out of her face. "I hardly ever see you anymore. I miss you Tana," she said, using the girl's childhood nickname.

"I'd like to spend time with you. But can we just stay at home?" Santana asked.

"Whatever you want," Louisa told her, surprised that her daughter actually wanted to spend time with her.

"Ok. I'll come home around 9," Santana told her.

"Ok I'll see you then," Louisa smiled again.

"Goodnight Mami," Santana threw her arms around her mother, almost knocking her over, and hugging her tightly. "I love you."

"I love you too," Louisa replied, looking questioningly at Natasha over Santana's shoulder. The small girl shrugged and mouthed 'tired, bit upset'. Louisa smiled sadly at her. When Santana finally released her, Louisa reached up to palm her cheek before moving around to sit next to Natasha on the edge of the bed. Natasha sat up and cocked her head questioningly. "Thanks for taking such good care of my girl Tasha," Louisa said softly. "I owe you one," she looked down hesitantly. "Can I give you a hug?" she asked. Natasha beamed and held out her arms, wriggling her fingers like a small child would. Louisa laughed at her actions and leaned in, hugging the girl gently. Natasha leaned her head against Louisa's shoulder and sighed.

"Thanks for letting me steal your girl from you all the time," she told her. Louisa pulled back and cupped her cheeks, leaning in to kiss her forehead.

"You should come and stay at our house sometimes," She invited.

"I'd like that. A change of scenery would be really nice," Natasha said ruefully. "Not that the beautiful room my lovely friends did up for me isn't fantastic," she added with a cheeky grin.

"Why did I not come over here and meet you earlier Tasha?" Louisa asked, smiling. "You're adorable."

"I am not," Natasha groaned.

"You are," Louisa teased, before she stood and wrapped her arms around her daughter again. "I'll see you in the morning," she pulled back and kissed Santana's forehead before moving to the door. "Night girls," she called back.

"Night," they replied in unison. When they heard Genevieve let Louisa out of the front door, Natasha turned to Santana.

"So will you go to therapy?" she asked.

"I don't want to," Santana replied stiffly.

"If you won't go for her…will you go for me? I didn't want to go either. And it's not like it's fun. But it helps. It really does help," Natasha told her, her big green eyes pleading.

"I don't want to," Santana repeated, with much less conviction this time.

"Please?" Natasha reached out, taking Santana's face in her hands again, gently pulling her eyes up to hers. "Please, Santana? I'm worried that when you stop sleeping here, and you don't have me as a distraction from everything, that you'll just crumble under the pressure of it all. You're my rock, Santana and I can't be strong for you without you to be strong for me. I know that doesn't make much sense… But, please go to therapy? Please?" Santana stared into the now watery green eyes in front of her unable to look away. There was so much in Natasha's eyes; so much that she was letting Santana see after weeks and weeks of locking it all away inside. There was pain, anguish, fear, anger, worry and torment swirling in the bright green pools, but pushing through it all there was hope. Santana finally forced herself to drag her eyes away.

"Ok," she whispered, barely audible.

"Ok?" Natasha asked hesitantly. Santana nodded.

"Ok. I'll go. For you," Santana told her.

"Thank you!" Natasha managed to semi-launch herself across the bed to wrap her arms around her friend. "I love you!" she squealed.

"You love me?" Santana asked grinning teasingly.

"Well, yeah," Natasha blushed. "You are like, my closest friend at this point in my life. And hey, we've been sleeping together for how many weeks now?" she grinned cheekily.

"Well don't say it like that! God if your parents hear that they'll think I'm some creepy, sex pervert who sneaks in your window every night for a quickie," Santana joked, not hearing the door open behind her.

"I'd never think that about you Santana," Greg said sweetly from the doorway. Natasha threw her head back and roared with laughter and Santana blushed bright red from head to toe.

"Aw fuck!" she murmured, throwing herself face down on the bed. "You weren't meant to hear that," came her muffled voice from the pillow. She reached out blindly to whack Natasha who was practically pissing her pants she was laughing so hard.

"You have stunning timing sweetheart," Greg laughed, reaching over to give the girl a gentle shove in the ribs, before leaning over her to kiss Natasha's temple. "Goodnight you two," he said, leaving them alone again.

"Oh my god," Santana lifted her head off of the pillow and glared at Natasha who was still giggling slightly.

"Poor Dad, I bet you've given him nightmares!" the smaller girl cackled, trying unsuccessfully to dodge the pillow Santana threw at her head.

Glee!

"I'm not on the Cheerios anymore," Santana said around a mouthful of pancake. Louisa paused in the midst of pouring maple syrup on her own pancakes.

"Shit," she said softly. Their mother-daughter day was just straight up awkward so far. She was so out of the loop on everything pertaining to Santana's life and she felt like she barely knew the girl in front of her. She was so different to the rude, obnoxious, brooding teenager she had been living with the past couple of years, but she was also so different from the girl she had been before. Spending time with her this morning Louisa had quickly seen that the innocence Santana had possessed before was totally gone, replaced by a kind of tormented wisdom that no girl her age should have possessed. "Uh, when did you quit?" she asked, shaking herself out of her thoughts, determined to try to get to know her daughter again.

"A few months ago, like right before nationals. Sue was going to shoot Brittany out of a human cannon as part of our routine and when Brittany didn't want to do it she gave us an ultimatum, Glee or Cheerios. All four of us quit," Santana explained.

"You all quit?" Louisa asked, surprised.

"She was going to get Brittany killed," Santana glared at her mother.

"Fair enough," Louisa told her.

"And how is Glee going?" she asked.

"Good. We're going to Nationals in New York in a few weeks," Santana told her. "We're meant to get the permission slips and stuff this week once they've sorted where we'll stay and shit," she added.

"Wow. You guys must be really good," Louisa said, a little shocked.

"We are. I sang the solo at sectionals this year. I was awesome," Santana said proudly.

"What did you sing?" Louisa asked, rolling her eyes at the show of arrogance that Santana was putting on.

"Amy Winehouse's version of Valerie," she replied.

"Wow," Louisa said, a little sadly. That was something she should have been there for. Santana had told her when sectionals were on but she had been in the midst of a big case and had been thinking about nothing else. She couldn't even remember if Santana had told her that she had a solo.

"Mami," Santana said softly. "Last night…," she trailed off. "I know it was rude and horrible, but Tash and I were listening to you and Gen talk," Santana dropped her eyes, feeling shame rise up inside her.

"Santana that is so rude," Louisa sighed.

"I know, I'm really sorry," Santana replied. "But we…we heard Genevieve say that she thought I should go see someone…like a therapist-," Santana began.

"Santana, I know you don't want-," Louisa began, interrupting Santana, but her daughter cut her off.

"I'll go. I want to go," she said softly.

"You do?" Louisa asked, a small smile lifting the corners of her lips.

"Yeah, I do," Santana told her. "I need to learn to live my own life again, instead of living Natasha. And maybe…maybe I can learn to be ok with myself so I can…," Santana trailed off, averting her eyes and blushing a little.

"So you can what, Tana?" Louisa encouraged, reaching out to grip her hand.

"Never mind," Santana replied, her blush deepening.

"You can tell me," Louisa smiled encouragingly, stroking her palm with her fingertips.

"So I can get my girl," Santana whispered, keeping her eyes on her plate, embarrassed. She glanced up through her eyelashes when her mom chuckled a little.

"Brittany?" she asked, carefully. Santana nodded. "Do her parents know?" she asked.

"No. I don't think so. Why?" Santana grilled, her hackles raising.

"So I don't say something where I shouldn't," Louisa's tone was rueful. "Mija if you love her and she loves you then I truly hope that the two you can work through the issues that you have and be together, if together is where you're meant to be," she added, honestly.

"Thanks," Santana mumbled uncomfortably. She wasn't used to shit getting so honest with her Mom. It felt kind of weird after all the years of telling her virtually nothing and getting virtually nothing in return. But it was weird in kind of a nice way…

Glee!

"Hold on! Hold on!" Rachel yelled out as she ran down the stairs as quickly as she could as someone leaned obnoxiously on the doorbell. She had no idea who it could be at 10am on a Sunday morning. She threw the door open and froze, staring in shock at the person on the other side. She opened and closed her mouth like a goldfish for a few seconds before she found her manners. "Uh, good morning Santana," she greeted nervously.

"Berry," Santana replied, her voice was the usual cold and bitchy one she used with Rachel but her eyes darted around, betraying her nervousness.

"Can…can I help you with something?" Rachel asked, playing anxiously with a belt loop on her jeans and looking past the girl, expecting to see the football team waiting, slushies in hand.

"I wants to learn how to make those cookies," Santana replied, still with the attitude, but Rachel was almost shocked to find dark, dark eyes openly pleading with her to say yes.

"Um sure. Come in," Rachel stepped back to let the other girl in, still looking for the trap. Santana smirked and stepped past her. But as she did she paused right next to Rachel, just long enough to mutter a soft 'thank you'. Rachel led her to the kitchen before turning around.

"Are you going to do something to me?" Rachel asked abruptly.

"No," Santana replied, leaning on the doorframe looking slightly bewildered at the sudden question.

"You really just want to bake cookies?" Rachel asked, cocking her head and studying the Latina for any sign that she was lying.

"Yeah," Santana shrugged.

"Why?" Rachel demanded.

"Well, because…," Santana looked away and sighed, deciding that since honesty was her new policy these days anyway, that at least partial honesty was probably the best route here. "Artie called Brittany stupid on Friday. She broke up with him and she's kind of devastated. She loves your cookies. I wanted to make her some to cheer her up," she admitted, leaving out the part about how she was meant to go on Brittany's lame YouTube talk show and say yes to going to prom with her.

"That bastard!" Rachel snapped, she was surprised at the Latina's honesty but anger toward Artie pushed that out of her mind "How dare he say that to Brittany? She may be a little slow to catch on sometimes but she is not stupid! Poor Brittany must have been so hurt!" Santana was stunned and more than a little pleased at Rachel's well directed anger, she hadn't know the girl actually cared that much about anyone other than herself.

"First time I've heard you swear, Berry, I'm impressed," she smirked.

"You know, you aren't much better Santana Lopez," Rachel continued her angry ranting, advancing on the Latina and courageously poking her finger into Santana's chest. "I watch Brittany's 'Fondue for Two' show and I know you stood her up. We all know you like her. Why can't you just admit it out loud? The world isn't going to fall away from under your feet because you're a lesbian or bi-sexual Santana," Rachel finished, her voice taking on the tone of a mother scolding a naughty two-year-old. It was Santana's turn to imitate a goldfish as she stared at the shorter girl in front of her, panic rising inside her, causing her breathing and heart rate to skyrocket.

"Just help me bake the freakin' cookies Rachel," She finally sputtered, desperately trying to push the panic down. Was she really that transparent? Did everybody really know? She had been terrified enough of her parents finding out but for some reason she was more afraid of her peers knowing what she was. High school was enough of a fucking shark tank without being the token lesbian. She didn't want to be Kurt Hummel 2.0; that idea scared the living shit out of her. It hadn't escaped her notice that Natasha had been left alone despite being openly gay, but she had figured it was because no one wanted to be the one who bullied the girl who almost got beaten to death with a baseball bat by her own brother.

"When you're ready to come out to us let me know. I have the perfect song you could sing," Rachel told her, her voice suddenly gentle and reassuring. Santana hauled herself out of her thoughts and just glared until Rachel huffed and started rummaging through the cupboards for ingredients. "I'm kind of surprised you didn't bring Tasha with you. You two are attached at the hip these days," she said conversationally. "And she would have served as a buffer between the two of us."

"Yeah well. I have to live my own life again at some point," Santana shrugged, ignoring Rachel's last comment. "Can we talk about something else?" Santana whined. This was getting too personal for her liking.

"Like what?" Rachel asked, lining up dry ingredients on the counter before reaching into the fridge for egg substitute and almond milk.

"Like how you should dress like this at school and not like a toddler-slash-grandmother," Santana stated with a smirk, blatantly checking looking the other girl up and down, she actually looked really good in bootleg jeans, bare feet and a plain black baby tee. Rachel just glared briefly before shrugging and turning back around. "Really though," Santana said seriously. "You look nice right now," she said awkwardly, not used to saying anything about Rachel's clothes that wasn't snarky and mean.

"Thank you," Rachel smiled slightly and beckoned Santana to come over to the counter. They washed their hands before setting to making cookies, in a surprisingly companionable silence. An hour and a half later Rachel walked Santana to the door, the Latina clutching a garish sky blue box with brightly coloured rainbow ribbon tied around it. Santana thought it was hideous. She knew Brittany would love it. As they reached the door Santana spun around abruptly, almost causing Rachel to slam into her.

"Thanks, for this," Santana told her, dropping the attitude and reaching out to rest her hand on the other girls forearm.

"You're welcome Santana. Any time," Rachel replied with a smile, gently patting the hand on her arm.

"I'll see you," Santana said gruffly, before turning and walking out to her car. Rachel just smiled and closed the door behind the other girl, shaking her head at the day's strange turn of events. If someone had told her a week ago that Santana Lopez would be asking her to help her bake cookies for the girl she loved she would have lectured them on the downfalls of the use of recreational drugs.

Glee!

Wow this one ended up being very Santana-centric! The next couple will be fairly heavily Brittana themed as i have promised from the start. I think I have about two or three more chapters and an epilogue left to do…Thanks to everyone who has read this one. I hope you enjoyed.

Extra Notes:

RIP Amy Winehouse, a tragic end to a life with so much potential. I know a lot of people say she brought it on herself, but she was just a young woman who made bad choices, we all make bad choices - some worse than others – and we need to learn to own our them and to learn from them. That said, addiction is such an awful disease and to try and deal with it with the world breathing down your neck must be near to impossible.

Also RIP to the poor souls killed in the attacks in Norway. I don't think there are words to describe the horror of what has happened over there, or to ease the pain of all of those families. Tragic.


	23. Chapter 22

Appearances

**A/N:** This one rushes the story along a little bit but it needed to happen to get it to where I wanted it. Hopefully the time jumps aren't too confusing…and I hope you enjoy.

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Glee…

Glee!

Chapter Twenty Two:

It was nearly 2am and Natasha was sound asleep when Santana crept silently back into her room. The Latina had had her first therapy session this afternoon. Her therapist was a woman named Jessica and she was nice enough. She had mostly just tried to get a little background on Santana's life, asking about her family, what her parents did for a living, where she went to school and who her friends were. Santana hadn't spoken much, just giving short, mostly one word answers to the woman's questions. Toward the end, Jessica had asked about Santana's love life and Santana had freaked out. Emotion boiled up inside her and Santana was shocked and humiliated when she uncontrollably burst into tears in front of the woman. Jessica had just smiled reassuringly, handed her some tissues and gotten her a cup of water. Once Santana had calmed down, Jessica had told her that she was in a safe, no-judgement zone and that anything she said was between them and no one else. Santana had been surprised to find herself believing the woman, although she hadn't really said anything else, just that she was in love with someone who didn't love her back. The whole session had brought a lot of emotion to the surface and Santana had found herself a little bit overwhelmed by it all and unable to sleep. She picked up Natasha's favourite blanket from where it had fallen on the floor and wrapped herself in it before curling into the recliner chair. She shifted when something dug into her back, reaching behind her and yanked out the toy cat that Brittany had given Natasha in the hospital. Santana tucked it under her head like a pillow and closed her eyes, listening to Natasha's soft breathing on the other side of the room. It didn't help, her mind still wouldn't quiet. After nearly 45 minutes Santana groaned and flicked Natasha's reading light on, picked a book at random from her bookshelf and began reading.

She was still reading when Natasha awoke at 6am.

"Santana?" the other girl mumbled sleepily.

"Yeah?" Santana asked, lowering the book slightly to peer over top of it.

"How long have you been awake?" she asked, rubbing at her eyes before peering at the clock.

"I don't know," Santana shrugged. "Like four hours I guess."

"Couldn't you sleep?" Natasha asked, a little alarmed.

"Nah," Santana said quietly, shaking her head gently.

"Why didn't you wake me? I could have helped," Natasha sat up, placing her feet on the floor. She stopped there though, still hesitant about putting weight on her leg with the cast off.

"I doubt it," Santana replied with a sad little shrug.

"Yes I could!" Natasha replied, looking affronted. Then her expression turned shy and vulnerable and she looked down at her bare toes. "I'd have cuddled you and sang you to sleep…like you did for me," she said softly, her voice just a whisper. Santana could have sworn her heart melted into a puddle in her chest in that moment. She put the book down and got up, walking over to the bed. Wordlessly she pulled Natasha up and into her arms, hugging her tightly.

"Thank you," she murmured, her words muffled against Natasha's neck. As she pulled back her right hand accidently brushed over Natasha's left hip, exposed from where her tank top had ridden up, and her fingertips brushed rough, scratched skin. She pulled back, looking down and Natasha reacted like she had been electrocuted, wrenching away from Santana and pulling her tank top down hard. Too hard it seemed, as the stretchy material pinged back up, exposing what Natasha was trying to hide. Above her left hip bone were nine small cuts, one lined up under another, all in various stages of healing. Santana's mind instantly rewound to the night Natasha had turned up at Brittany's house, injured and terrified. She suddenly remembered Quinn silently pointing out three small cuts above the girl's hipbone as they'd helped her change into pyjamas. "Tash-," she began.

"Don't," Natasha whimpered.

"It's ok," Santana smoothed her hair back. "It's ok," she repeated with a sigh. "I just…have you told Anna?" Natasha nodded, keeping her eyes down, not wanting to see the disappointment in Santana's eyes.

"I'm working on it," she said softly.

"Ok," Santana said lightly. "Tash, look at me," she tilted the other girl's chin up gently. Natasha's eyes flitted about before they finally settled on Santana's. She was surprised to find no disappointment there at all. "I'm here. If you need to talk, or you need a distraction, or anything. I'm here. If I can help you, please, tell me Tasha. Even if it's 3am."

"Kay," Natasha replied.

"I'm proud of you. I'm proud of how far you've come. I want you to know that," Santana told her.

"Thank you," Natasha smiled softly.

"Let's get ready for school," Santana said, changing the subject abruptly. Natasha groaned in reply.

Glee!

Brittany was trying in vain to get the clip back onto the end of her braid without letting go of the braid when the door to the girls' bathroom swung open. She didn't even spare a glance at whoever had come in; too busy with her hair, the fine blonde strands refusing to do as she wanted them to. She almost jumped out of her skin when warm hands landed on hers, taking the clip and the end of the braid. Santana kept her eyes fixed on the blonde hair as Brittany's hands dropped away, letting her clip the braid neatly in place. Her hands dropped away when she was certain Brittany's hair was perfect.

"Thanks," Brittany beamed, inspecting her hair happily. She turned to smile brightly at her friend and almost had the wind knocked out of her as Santana threw her arms around her waist, her head falling against Brittany's shoulder as she pulled the blonde to her, holding on tight. Brittany immediately wrapped her arms around the girl, one hand travelling up to tangle in thick black hair. "What's wrong?" Brittany asked.

"It's all just so hard Britt," Santana mumbled against her shoulder.

"What's hard honey?" Brittany asked, legitimately confused.

"Everything," Santana replied. "You, Natasha, Me. It's confusing and it's scary and it's just hard." Santana tightened her arms around her friend, to a point where Brittany's ribs began to ache.

"I bet it is. Well, it's hard for me too but I know it's harder for you," Brittany's hand in Santana's hair began to move, stroking through her hair, nails gently scraping against her scalp every so often. The arm wrapped around her waist loosened and then a hand began travelling slowly up and down her back. When Brittany began humming softly, Santana's grip loosened and her tense muscles began to relax under Brittany's ministrations. The blonde dropped a kiss onto the shorter girl's head before resting her cheek on the same spot. Santana felt the calmness she had been seeking seep into her body, the calmness that only Brittany had ever been able to instil in her. She missed being held like that so bad it hurt.

"I miss you Britt," Santana mumbled softly.

"I miss you too," Santana could hear the smile in the blonde's voice. Brittany dropped another kiss onto her head before pulling back. She reached up to wipe tears from Santana's cheeks, tears the darker girl hadn't even realised she had been crying. "You don't have to miss me you know," Brittany told her softly.

"Brittany don't," Santana replied, her voice equally soft.

"Ok," Brittany gave in, knowing better than to push while Santana was feeling so vulnerable. "But even if you're not ready to be with me, you need to stop hurting me." Santana's eyes dropped, her heart aching at Brittany's words. She was well aware at how she had fucked it up this time. Campaigning for prom king and queen with Karofsky as her beard and vice versa had been cruel enough but telling Jacob Ben-Israel that they were soul mates, while Brittany watched on with a look of absolute devastation on her face, was something Santana would hate herself for forever. The fact that in spite of how badly Santana had hurt her, Brittany had fully supported her when she lost Prom Queen to Kurt just made her hate herself even more.

"I am so sorry B," she whispered.

"Just stop ok?" Brittany pleaded, she couldn't take much more of that kind of pain.

"Ok," Santana nodded, tears escaping down her cheeks again.

"And please, please, break up with him Santana. It's not fair on anyone," Brittany begged.

"I don't…I can't," Santana stammered.

"Yes you can. You're both just lying to yourselves and you're hurting me," Brittany saw Santana's eyes widen when she realised that Brittany knew about Karofsky. "You know me San. I've always been good at knowing. I knew about Natasha," she said by way of explanation, she had originally been the one who had told Santana that she thought Natasha was gay. "And he's not exactly careful with his ogling."

"Britt I can't…I," Santana tried again.

"Santana, if you love me at all, you will," Brittany told her, her eyes and voice taking on a hard, angry edge that chilled Santana to the bone. It was so out of place on the usually bubbly blonde. Brittany reached out and tangled her pinky with Santana's for a brief few moments before releasing it and walking out of the bathroom, leaving Santana to her thoughts.

Glee!

"Wait! What are you doing?" Rachel yelped nervously when Santana grabbed her by the arm and yanked her unceremoniously into one of the plane bathrooms a week later. "You're not going to rape me are you? I have a rape whistle!" Rachel squeaked out indignantly, her hands shaking as she tried to extract said whistle from her pocket in the tiny space.

"Jesus Fucking Christ Berry! Do I look like a rapist to you?" Santana snarled.

"You threatened to kill me in New York," Rachel muttered indignantly.

"That would make me homicidal, not a rapist," Santana spat back in utter exasperation. "You are so dramatic."

"Forgive me for being a little afraid of you when it required Mike, Sam _and_ Quinn to hold you back to keep you from attacking Finn and I after Nationals!" Rachel shot back, her voice still high pitched and her eyes darting around fearfully as her mind flickered back to Santana raving like a lunatic in Spanish after Rachel and Finn's onstage kiss cost them Nationals. Santana was so sure that if they hadn't done that then her song would have won it for them.

"Oh for the love of God," Santana shook her head. "Wait here," she stalked out of the stall and came back a few seconds later with a half-asleep Natasha in tow. She managed to squish all three of them into the tiny bathroom and close the door.

"Santana what the fuck?" she mumbled, voice thick with sleep. She was pressed almost chest to chest with Rachel and Santana was standing in what little space was left behind her.

"Berry thinks I dragged her in here to rape her. You're here because she knows you wouldn't let that happen," Santana explained in exasperation.

"Sure," Natasha mumbled, dropping her head onto Rachel's shoulder and wrapping her arms loosely around her waist. "I sleep, you talk," she mumbled.

"Berry you told me that when I was ready to come out to Glee Club to tell you. That you had the perfect song for me to sing," the anger and exasperation were completely gone from Santana's voice now. Natasha's head shot up off Rachel's shoulder and she spun around, accidently elbowing Santana in the boob as she did, causing the taller girl to let out a pained yelp and clutch at her chest.

"Sorry. Tana are you sure?" she asked, her eyes wide.

"No. I have never been less sure about anything in my whole fucking life," Santana told her, her voice shaking.

"Then why-," Rachel began.

"Because there's something else that I have never been _more_ sure of in my life," Santana interrupted. "I can't lose her. I can't," she whispered, her voice desperate.

"You know that we'll support you Santana. We're a family. We'll love you no matter what. I know you're scared Santana. Of a lot of things. But one thing you never have to be afraid of is rejection by us. That'll never happen," Rachel told Santana gently, reaching around Natasha to capture Santana's hand.

"Just tell me the song Berry," Santana sighed. She rolled her eyes but her hand clinging to Rachel's for dear life meant she wasn't fooling anyone.

"Oh it's going to be so perfect!" Rachel beamed. "Brittany is going to love it. When do you want to sing it?"

"Last Glee Club meeting of the year," Santana replied instantly. Rachel let out a happy little squeal before she enthusiastically filled Santana in on her plan. Santana was surprised to find that it captured what she wanted to tell Brittany perfectly. Later, after they had gone back to their seats, Rachel to make a detailed outline of the performance and a rehearsal schedule to perfect Santana's song in a little over 72 hours, Natasha leaned over to Santana.

"I am so proud of you," she whispered, squeezing the other girl's hand.

"I think you bruised my boob," Santana replied, a brief smile the only acknowledgement of Natasha's sentiment.

"Oh toughen up. I didn't hit it that hard," Natasha rolled her eyes. "Goof."

"I'm not a goof," Santana retorted.

"You are a goof. You're a goofball. Goofiest goofball ever. It's a fact," Natasha teased.

"It is not a fact," Santana argued.

"It's a fact because I say it's a fact. I'm from Raglan County," Natasha couldn't help the smile that broke out.

"Raglan County my ass. Lima Heights Adjacent would kick Raglan County's ass," Santana retorted.

"In your dreams woman," Natasha came back, sitting back in her seat as they both laughed softly. "Hey," Natasha reached out to tilt Santana's face toward hers. "You know I have your back right? At school and stuff? If anyone gives you or B shit they'll answer to me," she told her seriously.

"Thank you," Santana said softly, through a very watery smile.

Glee!

The first practice session was an absolute shambles. Santana was edgy and getting edgier as her nerves grew. She messed the song up over and over until Rachel got extremely annoyed and snapped at her, causing Santana to fly off the handle and into one of her infamous rages, hurling abuse at the other girl in Spanish before lunging at her. As she lunged however, she accidently bowled Natasha over, causing the smaller girl to land on her still tender right arm and scream in pain. Louisa Lopez had arrived home early 20 minutes later and walked into the living room to find both Santana and Natasha crying and one very exasperated Rachel Berry trying to simultaneously hold an ice pack on Natasha's sore arm and calm Santana, who was now hyperventilating as she apologised over and over.

"What is going on?" Louisa asked, putting her bags down and heading for Natasha first.

"Santana tried to kill me and in the process she knocked Natasha over and she landed on her bad arm. Now Tasha's in pain and Santana is having a nervous breakdown or something!" Rachel told her, her brown eyes pleading for Louisa to do something to help.

"Ok. Honey there are painkillers in the cupboard above the sink in the bathroom. Aspirin, paracetamol and ibuprofen I think, Tash you can take your pick," Louisa told Rachel and Natasha as she turned Santana around and wrapped her arms around her, pulling her daughter's back against her chest. "Tana you need to slow your breathing. Listen to me carefully and try to do what I say. Ok, I want you to cup your hands over your mouth. Good girl, now big breath in…big breath out…big breath in…big breath out…that's it, just keep doing that," Louisa instructed, carefully letting go of Santana with one hand to reach out and wipe tears off of a sniffling Natasha's cheeks with her thumb. "Are you ok?" she asked. "Big breaths Tana," she reminded her daughter as she felt her breathing quicken again.

"I'm ok," Natasha hiccupped. "Just in pain is all," she sniffled miserably. Louisa brushed damp strands of hair off the girl's face as Rachel came back with the ibuprofen Natasha had requested. Rachel had opted to go home soon after, leaving Louisa to an evening of trying to cheer up two very miserable girls.

The second practice the next day went about as well as the first only this time Santana didn't try to lunge at Rachel, she just screamed in Spanish until Rachel burst into tears and Natasha stunned them both into silence when she started screaming back in flawless Spanish that kind of put Santana's rusty threats and insults to shame. Natasha had then stormed out of her own room pausing only to shriek one last insult back over her shoulder, in English this time.

"Fuck I am so glad you only have to come out to Glee Club once Santana, because if you had to do it again I'd probably fucking murder you! With my bare hands!"

Thankfully the third and final practice went off without a hitch, Santana managing to divert her anger into a grim determination to nail the song. They practiced all afternoon, with Rachel trying especially hard to be patient with Santana, bringing her warm water with lemon and honey to soothe her voice a couple of times and trying not to nitpick her technique too much. Natasha for her part kept a quiet watchful eye over everything, encouraging Santana when she needed it and sending her death glares if she looked like she was about to explode again. When it started getting late they decided to call it a day.

"Thanks, Rachel," Santana said as she pulled her jacket on.

"You're welcome," Rachel smiled tiredly. "See you both at school tomorrow."

"See you Rach," Natasha leaned in and kissed the other girl's cheek affectionately before they left and Santana drove them back to Natasha's house to drop the other girl off. They travelled the distance in silence, neither girl speaking until they pulled up to the curb outside Natasha's house. Natasha turned to Santana. "Want to stay over tonight?" she asked.

"No that's ok," Santana shook her head.

"Ok," Natasha smiled. She reached out and grabbed Santana's hand, lacing their fingers together. "Try to get some sleep ok? And try not to be too nervous," she told her.

"I'll try," Santana shook her head slightly. "I can't believe I'm going to do this. This is scary shit," she gripped Natasha's hand tightly.

"Yeah I know," Natasha told her. "But Rach and I will be there. And Britt is going to love this. Just think, that this time tomorrow she'll be yours."

"Maybe," Santana corrected. "Maybe she'll be mine."

"There's no maybe about it Santana," Natasha told her. "She'll be yours." Natasha gently untangled her fingers from Santana's before leaning over to kiss her cheek. "Night Santana." Natasha got out of the car, beaming proudly at Santana before she closed the door and disappeared into her house. Santana watched her until she was safely inside before heading home. She tossed and turned all night, finally falling asleep at around 4am.

Glee!

"I don't know if I can do this," Santana's voice shook with the force of her nerves. She had never been so terrified in her life. She was about to lay herself out, not just to Brittany but to the entire Glee Club. Her hands shook and she dropped the lip gloss that she was attempting to apply. "Fuck," she cursed angrily.

"Breathe, Tana," Natasha soothed, bending to pick up the tube and pushing Santana's hands away when she reached for it. "Here," Natasha unscrewed the cap and pulled out the wand, carefully applying the gloss to Santana's lips. "There, beautiful," she smiled sweetly. She winced when she was pulled into a vice-like hug, crushed tightly against Santana's chest.

"Tasha, I...You're…Fuck I can't find my words," Santana let go of the smaller girl, throwing her hands over her eyes.

"Santana just try to breathe. The right words will come. We're going to be late, honey," Natasha pointed out.

"Oh god," Santana almost cried. Her heart was pounding in her chest; her pulse thumping in her neck, her breathing was incredibly ragged. She wasn't sure which she wanted to do more, throw up or cry. Her stomach was full of butterflies and she realised that this was it. The moment she had dreaded and simultaneously craved for so long. She sent up a silent prayer – something she hadn't done for a long time – that Brittany would want to be with her after this. "Ok. Let's do this. Before I lose my nerve altogether," Santana took a deep breath and looked in the mirror, smoothing a few strands of her hair back into place.

"Let's do it," Natasha held the door open and Santana walked out.

They sat next to each other in the Choir Room as Mr Schue showed them their 12th place trophy and told them how proud he was of them and of how far they had come. Santana thought he was never going to stop talking and she was beginning to lose her nerve. She felt herself start to freak out and decided enough was enough.

"Mr Schue I have a song. Please?" she asked shakily.

"Are you ok Santana?" Mr Schue asked in concern.

"I'm fine, I just have to do this. Now, before I lose my nerve. Please?" Santana begged, the shaking getting noticeably worse.

"Sure, go ahead," Mr Schue nodded, eyeing her worriedly.

"Ok," she breathed out, closing her eyes and rubbing at her temples. The panic rose up and the feeling of wanting to cry or throw up came back. She gasped a few times before her eyes flew open and her eyes searched the worried faces of her friends until she found the one she wanted. "Tasha help, please?" she pleaded.

"Ok, ok," Natasha walked over and took her by the hand, lacing their fingers together tightly. "Breathe sweetheart, you can do this." Santana pulled in a deep shaky breath and squeezed Natasha's hand painfully tightly.

"I…I…I," Santana stammered. The whole Glee Club were looking at her in deep concern now, never ever having seen the fiery Latina like this before, shaking uncontrollably, terror in her eyes. "I want you all to know," Santana swallowed hard and sucked in another deep breath. "That I…I…I love Brittany," It was out. It was out and the words came easier to Santana then. "I'm in love with Brittany and I'm tired of hiding and hurting. Britt this is for you," Santana finally released Natasha's hand, smiling slightly when she caught sight of Kurt, silently clapping his hands in excitement in the back row, a look of absolute pride on his face. She nodded at Brad and he began to play the opening bars to the song. Santana sucked a breath in and closed her eyes to focus on the music.

_Lying beside you, here in the dark  
Feeling your heart beat with mind  
Softly you whisper, you're so sincere  
How could our live be so blind _

_We sailed on together  
We drifted apart  
And here you are by my side_

So now I come to you, with open arms  
Nothing to hide, believe what I say  
So here I am with open arms  
Hoping you'll see what your love means to me  
Open arms

Living without you, living alone  
This empty house seems so cold  
Wanting to hold you, wanting you near  
How much I wanted you home

But now that you've come back  
Turned night into day  
I need you to stay.

So now I come to you, with open arms  
Nothing to hide, believe what I say  
So here I am with open arms  
Hoping you'll see what your love means to me  
Open arms

Santana had had her eyes closed the entire song and now she opened them slowly, her eyes roving over the other Club Members. Natasha had crept back to sit next to Quinn and the two of them along with Kurt were beaming proudly, Santana could see the sheen of tears in Natasha's eyes. Finn looked flummoxed, Mike and Puck both looked proud too, Artie looked like he wanted to hit something, Lauren smiled and nodded at her, Rachel had tears streaming down her face, Mercedes was trying to discreetly wipe at her eyes and Tina gave her a beaming smile and a thumbs up. Mr Schue looked prouder than she had even seen him look before. If that was even possible. Her eyes finally drifted to the person whose reaction meant the most to her. Santana's breath caught in her throat at the sight. Brittany's cheeks were streaked with tears, her blue eyes even bluer than usual and she wore the brightest, most beautiful smile Santana had even seen.

"Brittany I love you. This is the hardest thing I have ever had to do, and I can't describe how afraid I was to do it. But I did it. I did it for you. I did it because popularity and not getting bullied wasn't worth not being with you. You're my best friend and you're my whole world Britt, well most of it," she glanced up at Natasha and Quinn with a smile. "Britt, I'm running out of words can you say something, please?" she said shakily, tears escaping to run down her cheeks. She glanced down briefly and when her eyes lifted again a blonde blur was coming toward her. Brittany almost bowled her off her feet.

"I love you too. I love you. I'm so, so, so proud of you. Oh Santana I knew you could do it! You're the bravest, most amazing person I know," the blonde sobbed out, she pulled back and leaned it to plant a quick kiss on Santana's lips, before hugging her tightly.

"Santana?" Artie's voice broke into the moment. Santana looked down at him, steeling herself, but only seeing a resigned sadness in his eyes. "Way to get your woman," he told her, holding out his hand. Santana took it hesitantly. "That was really brave."

"Thank you," Santana said, stunned. Artie just shrugged and wheeled himself away. Santana found herself being hugged silly by every member of the Glee Club. Puck picked her up and swung her around before setting her back on the ground and kissing her cheek, Lauren gave her hand a squeeze and gave her an encouraging smile, their former rivalry ended immediately at the knowledge that Santana actually didn't still have eyes for Puck. Kurt hugged Santana so tightly she thought she might break in two, as did Rachel and Quinn. Mercedes and Mike slapped her high fives and Natasha just stood back and smiled brightly at the whole scenario. Santana and Brittany had been pulled apart in the midst of the chaos but their eyes kept finding each other across the room and as soon as the others headed back to their seats they were wrapped in each other's arms again.

Santana felt so free, for the first time in a long time she was free to be herself. She felt like the weight of the world had been lifted from her shoulders and it felt _good._ It felt incredible. She knew that it wasn't going to be an easy road but for now she was content to let it play out how it played out and deal with any crap as it came, instead of worrying about it beforehand. Brittany pressing her lips against hers again pulled Santana from her thoughts and the two went to join their friends on the risers, hand in hand.

Glee!

One more chapter and an epilogue to go ;-)


	24. Chapter 23

Appearances

**A/N:** This one is kind of fluffier than I usually write, but there's still angst as well. I hope you all enjoy and sorry for the delay. I'm working on too much at once right now!

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Glee…

Glee!

Chapter Twenty Three:

"I am totally spending the rest of the summer right here," Natasha sighed happily. She was stretched out on a towel on the grass next to the pool at Santana's. Brittany and Quinn were stretched out on towels on either side of her and Santana was floating on her inflatable raft in the water. They were all drinking cocktails and just soaking up the sun.

"Me too," Quinn replied sleepily, turning onto her back.

"Santana?" Brittany was sitting up, pulling uncomfortably at the halter strap of her bikini.

"Yeah?" Santana's relaxed voice floated over from the raft.

"Can I take my top off?" Brittany asked.

"No, B," Santana quickly replied.

"But it's annoying me! I hate it," Brittany pouted miserably.

"You hate clothes in general B," Santana replied dryly. If Brittany had her way she would be running around naked all of the time.

"I know but I hate this the most," Brittany continued to pout.

"Clothes on today B, there are other people here," Santana said warningly. She couldn't see the other three as her raft had turned around on the water and her back was to them.

"I'm taking it off," Brittany leaned close to Natasha to whisper.

"Go for it B," Natasha whispered back, suppressing her laughter, this was bound to be entertaining.

"Yay!" Brittany whispered back, taking the top off in record time. Natasha fought even harder to hold in her laughter as the dancer crept over to the side of the pool and pinged the top over the back of the raft, landing it neatly on Santana's head.

"Brittany Susan Pierce!" the Latina shrieked when she realised what had landed on her. She tried to turn in the raft to glare at her girlfriend but in her haste she managed to capsize it and ended up in the pool with a splash. Natasha and Quinn cracked up as the Latina surfaced, coughing and spluttering, the bikini top still clasped in her hand. "Put it back on!" Santana yelled.

"No!" Brittany yelled back. Santana hauled herself out of the pool, glaring threateningly at the topless blonde.

"Brittany-," she warned.

"Make me!" Brittany shrieked. She took off as Santana lunged at her and ran around to the other side of the pool, tossing pool furniture into Santana's path as the other girl gave chase.

"Brittany you are not running around my back yard topless!" Santana shrieked.

"Nope!" Brittany yelled back, stopping briefly to yank her bottoms off too.

"Oh my God! Brittany put that back on now!" Santana yelled in horror as her girlfriend streaked around the back yard buck naked. She glared absolutely murderously at Natasha and Quinn who were laughing hysterically, but it was pointless since both of them had their hands clapped over their eyes. "Oh fuck me! Brittany no!" Santana shrieked, her voice slightly desperate now. Natasha and Quinn peeked through their fingers just in time to see Brittany going for the gate that led to the front yard. The naked blonde stopped though, turning around and sticking her tongue out at her furious girlfriend. Santana came to a stop in front of her holding out both pieces of her bikini.

"Are you done?" she asked. "Now that you've given Tash, Quinn and half of the neighbourhood a free show," she added.

"Yes," Brittany replied grinning cheekily. She took the bikini from Santana and pulled her bottoms back on, before heading over to the others, still topless.

"Britt!" Santana yelled.

"Just a sec San," Brittany replied. "Tasha?" she asked as she got to the other girls.

"Yeah?" Tash asked, averting her eyes lest Santana decide she was perving on her girlfriend and smack her.

"Can we swap tops?" she asked sweetly. "It's too small and it cuts in and you can't adjust the halter. Yours has spaghetti straps," the blonde explained. Natasha laughed and took the offered top, putting it on and then removing her tankini top from underneath and handing it to the blonde, who started putting it on. Natasha squirmed a little uncomfortably as Santana's dark eyes quickly travelled to the newly revealed skin above her hips, obviously checking for fresh cuts. Her eyes registered relief when they found none. "Happy?" Brittany asked Santana once she had Natasha's slightly too small top on. Santana was actually surprised it fit at all given the size difference between Natasha and Brittany. The tankini top had sat loose and just above the hips on Natasha but on taller, slightly broader Brittany it was tighter and sat just above her belly button.

"If any part of that bikini comes off outside again then so help me I will glue it on," Santana warned in exasperation.

"It won't! I'm comfy now," Brittany smiled contentedly, trying to squeeze onto Natasha's towel with her, wrapping an arm around her waist before picking up her drink and taking a sip.

"Sometimes I feel like I'm dating a three year old," Santana mumbled as she stalked back over to the pool, grabbing her raft out before it floated back out into the middle of the pool, before coming back to lie on her towel to dry out.

"You guys going to Puck's tonight?" Quinn asked.

"His end of year/start of summer party?" Natasha asked, trying to subtly wriggle away from Brittany's fingers that were completely innocently wandering along her bottom rib.

"Yeah," Quinn confirmed.

"I don't know. Who's going?" Natasha asked.

"The rest of Glee Club, few Cheerios and football guys," Quinn shrugged.

"Well that party is going to be a powder keg waiting to go off isn't it?" Santana grinned deviously. "We are so there. Right B?"

"Right. But I hope no one fights," Brittany said, her forehead crinkling adorably in worry.

"Yeah I guess I'm in," Natasha decided. "If Q is," she looked to the smaller blonde questioningly.

"I'm going," Quinn told her.

"It's on then," Natasha nodded, rubbing her hands together with a grin.

Glee!

"Oh my God! That is fucking hilarious!" Natasha cackled gleefully as a red faced Brittany recounted the story of what had happened that afternoon after Natasha and Quinn had left and she and Santana had gone back to her house. "Ow!" she shrieked when Santana punched her none too gently in the arm. They were at Puck's party, sitting on the couch which had been pushed back against a wall.

"It was not hilarious! It was mortifying! God the sex talk when I was thirteen was bad enough but having to sit there while both your mom and your girlfriend's mom talk you about respectful sex practices was just humiliating!" Santana had a nice pink glow to her cheeks as well.

"At least you know that your parents know now Britts!" Natasha cackled evilly. Brittany just buried her face in her hands and shook her head. Natasha laughed again and leaned over to plant a kiss in her perfectly curled blonde hair. As she leaned back she noticed a girl across the room watching her. The girl, a Cheerio whose name Natasha had forgotten, had been eyeing her all night and whispering to her friend. Natasha figured that they were just gossiping about her or Santana and Britt and so she glared at her before deciding to ignore her. "I'm done, I'm done," she laughed, pulling her attention back to the conversation at hand, lifting her beer to her lips, taking a sip and glaring at Santana who was lining up tequila shots. Natasha tried to quell the urge to laugh again as she thought over the story she had just heard, thoroughly amused by the fact that Helen Pierce had actually called Louisa Lopez to come and give their kids a talk on respect after catching the two girls in an extremely compromising position on Brittany's bed.

"What are we talking about," Quinn asked as she sidled up to sit next to Natasha, her face flushed from dancing with one of the football guys.

"Santana and Britt getting caught having sex by Britt's mom," Natasha told her. Quinn snorted and choked on her wine cooler.

"Oh that is awesome!" Quinn laughed. "But seriously, do you not lock the door?"

"No! Not awesome! Not funny and not awesome! And we just forgot this time!" Santana had downed two tequila shots in quick succession and between that and the several beers she had had already she was fast heading into weepy-hysterical territory, tears pooling in her eyes.

"Oh honey, I'm sure it was awful!" Quinn said, her voice shaking with barely suppressed laughter.

"It was," Santana said sullenly, apparently placated for now.

"Uh, hi," a voice spoke from beside Natasha. She turned and found the Cheerio who had been eyeing her all night standing beside her.

"Hi," Natasha smiled her sickly sweet 'I'll slap you if this wastes my time' smile. "Can I help you with something?" she asked, arching an eyebrow and engaging her HBIC face.

"I just, uh, my name is Jennika Peterson. I'm on the Cheerios with you," the girl stammered. She shrank back as Santana and Quinn both put on their HBIC glares as well.

"I know that," Natasha replied, her eyebrow arching even higher.

"I um, um, I...I…wondered if you wanted to maybe go out to Breadstix with me sometime?" the girl blurted out. "Like on a date," she whispered afterwards, staring at her shoes, her confidence draining under the pressure of three harsh glares. Natasha's HBIC act abruptly disappeared, surprise writing itself all over her face in its place.

"You want to go out with me?" she asked, stunned.

"Yeah, like a lot," Jennika replied, a small smile pulling at the corners of her lips.

"I…I'd like that," Natasha replied, suddenly nervous. She looked up and caught sight of Brittany beaming at her, nodding furiously, and Santana with an eyebrow raised.

"Great. Um, I have your number from the Cheerios list. I'll call you sometime?" Jennika asked, a small nervous smile on her face.

"Yeah, ok," Natasha smiled genuinely and Jennika's face lit up.

"Awesome!" she beamed happily. Suddenly her nervousness took over again when she moved to stand in front of Santana. "Um, Santana I just, I wanted to say thank you. What you did, coming out for Brittany? It was really, really brave…and it made me feel like I don't have to hide anymore. So, uh thanks," Jennika told her, holding out a cautious hand to the Latina. Santana swallowed hard, her eyes wide and shocked, and shook her hand. "I'll call you," Jennika said to Natasha again before she walked back over to her group of friends.

"See San?" Brittany said softly, her smile stretching from ear to ear. "I told if you would just be yourself then everybody would see how awesome you are and love you for it!" the blonde threw her arms around her girlfriend's neck, almost smothering her in a tight hug.

"She's cute," Quinn said to Natasha, with a giggle.

"Cute? Should I start calling you Quinn Fab-gay?" Santana taunted, seemingly recovered from her shock at Jennika's speech.

"Oh that's original," Quinn rolled her eyes. "And I'm just saying," she giggled again, her cheeks flushing pink as she took a sip of her wine cooler.

"Did you just get asked out by that hot brunette Cheerio Issacs?" Puck's voice boomed out from behind her. Natasha turned to glare at the boy, smiling and shaking her head at the signature waggling eyebrows.

"I did. Hey Lauren," she greeted Puck's girlfriend who had just arrived. Lauren gave a small wave in greeting.

"Nice," Puck beamed. "Did you say yes?"

"I did," Natasha repeated, blushing a little.

"Told her you would," he beamed. At Natasha's questioning look her elaborated. "I overheard her friend tell her to go for it and I told her she should, that you'd totally say yes," he beamed at her, proud of his matchmaking.

"Thanks Puck," Natasha beamed back. "Who knew you had a sweet side? I thought you were just all man whore-y all the time!"

"Nah. You deserve a good woman, Warrior Princess," he told her, bending to kiss her forehead affectionately before he ruffled her hair, earning him a glare. "Now speaking of good women, Puckasaurus must go dance with his before she gets mad at him. Later ladies," he grinned as he got dragged off by Lauren.

"Come on B," Natasha said, finishing the last of her beer before standing up and holding out her hand to the blonde. "I believe you promised me a dance!"

"Yay!" Brittany bounced up and nearly pulled Natasha over in her haste to get to the impromptu dance floor in the middle of the Puckerman's living room. Santana laughed as the two of them started pulling out ridiculous old-school moves on the dance floor, cracking each other up.

"Wanna dance Quinnie?" Santana asked, holding out her hand to the blonde.

"Why not?" Quinn asked, taking the proffered hand and allowing herself to be pulled to her feet. A slow song came on as they reached the other two and Santana immediately wrapped her arms around Quinn lightly, pulling her closer as Natasha and Brittany did the same. About halfway through the song, they did a swap around, Natasha pulling Quinn into her arms, allowing Brittany and Santana to dance together. Natasha led them away a little bit.

"They're so happy now," Natasha smiled softly, resting her head against Quinn's shoulder.

"They are. I'm kind of jealous," Quinn admitted.

"Me too," Natasha giggled.

"Hey at least you got yourself a date tonight!" Quinn told her, lightly pinching the hip her hand was resting on.

"You looked like you were enjoying your dance with that Timothy guy," Natasha retorted.

"He's sweet," Quinn told her. "And really genuine. I think I kind of like him," she admitted.

"Good. You deserve someone to love you too Quinn. Someone other than me that is. I love you this much!" Natasha told her, stretching out her arms to demonstrate. Quinn laughed hugging the girl tighter to her. Natasha laughed back, dropping her head back against Quinn's shoulder, snuggling into the taller girl affectionately. "Shit," she swore suddenly, as she glanced over at Brittany and Santana, who were dancing with their eyes closed, unaware of the two senior Cheerio's sneaking up on them one holding a big glass of beer, obviously intending to upend it on the two girls. Natasha wrenched out of Quinn's grasp and took off in their direction ducking between them just in time to grab the girl's wrist. She pushed her back, away from Santana and Brittany and forced her wrist up roughly, causing the girl to tip the beer all over herself instead.

"Bitch!" the beer-soaked girl's friend shrieked.

"Yeah!" Natasha seethed. "You wanna see how much of a bitch I am?" she asked. She dropped the cup, pulled her left arm back and then slapped the other girl hard across the cheek, leaving a bright red palm print. The girl lunged at her but Natasha ducked, slightly awkwardly given that her leg still wasn't even close to 100% and the girl lost her balance and staggered past her. She whipped around only to cop another slap across the face from Natasha.

"Why are you defending those filthy fucking dykes? Their 'relationship' is an abomination! They're fucking disgusting! But I guess since you're one of them you'd better stick up for your own!" the girl snarled cruelly at Natasha, holding her hand over her now bruising cheek.

"Yup, and I will always stick up for them!" Natasha responded angrily. She glanced around; realising that someone had turned the music off and everyone at the party had circled around them, anticipating the fight. When her eyes fell on Brittany's face Natasha felt her anger turn into pure, unadulterated fury. The usually bubbly blonde had her face half buried into a distraught looking Santana's shoulder, and the half of her face that Natasha could see was stained with tears, her blue eye expressing the depth of her pain. "I'm going to fucking kill you!" Natasha shrieked, launching herself at the two girls managing to scratch the girl who was still dripping with beer across the cheek before two sets of strong arms wrapped around her waist and hauled her off them. "No one makes Brittany cry! You watch your fucking back because I am going to fucking get you! I will fucking cut you!" she screamed as Finn and surprisingly, Karofsky grabbed the other two girls and escorted them out of Puck's house. "Fucking bitches!" Natasha screamed after them, putting up a damn good fight to get out of Sam and Puck's arms. They lifted her up until her feet were clear of the ground so that she couldn't get away.

"Tasha stop it! Calm down. They're gone. Go take care of Santana and Brittany," Puck said soothingly into her ear, grunting as she fought him. Then suddenly Natasha deflated in their arms, her anger draining out of her, and the two boys set her down and let her go. She sucked in a deep breath and turned to where Santana was still standing, rooted to the spot with her arms loosely wrapped around a now sobbing Brittany. "Move along people," Puck called out as Natasha moved toward the two girls.

"Santana?" Natasha said gently. Quinn had managed to break through the dispersing crowd and get to them now too. Santana didn't move, fat tears spilled over and ran down her cheeks. "Aw honey," Natasha reached up, wiping at Santana's tears before leaning up to kiss her cheek. She ran the fingers of her other hand through Brittany's silky blonde hair. Santana finally seemed to snap out of her daze.

"I knew it'd happen eventually and I knew it'd be bad," her voice cracked. "But that was awful!" she tightened her hold on Brittany as she lost control and her chest started hitching.

"I'm so sorry," Quinn whispered softly, rubbing Santana's arm, trying to give the girl some comfort. Natasha glanced pointedly at Quinn, then Santana before she gently prised Brittany out of a now sobbing Santana's arms, pulling her into her own. Quinn led Santana away in one direction to try to settle her down while Natasha stayed put, hugging Brittany tightly to her.

"I'm sorry sweetheart. You never should have had to go through that," Natasha crooned softly to the blonde, gently stroking her hair.

"It's ok," Brittany said softly, her voice wobbly and broken. The blonde's voice combined with the deep hurt in her eyes made Natasha feel like someone had ripped her heart out and stomped on it.

"No it's not Brittany. It's not ok. They had no right to do that. No right to make you feel like less of a person because of who you love. That will never be ok," Natasha leaned back palming the tears off of Brittany's cheeks with both hands. "But having said that I want you to ignore them, ok? The people who love you support you and Santana fully and we're the ones who matter. Ok?" Natasha asked, looking deep into Brittany's baby blue eyes.

"Ok," Brittany said with a tiny smile. She leaned in and planted a friendly kiss on the corner of Natasha's lips.

"Are you ok Brittany? That was really awful!" Rachel asked nervously as she approached the two girls.

"Yeah, I'm ok," Brittany said, smiling bravely. She beamed at Natasha when Rachel threw her arms around her in a warm hug. Natasha couldn't help but notice the fact that her smile didn't meet her eyes.

"I'm so sorry that happened. Those girls are awful. I should tell my Dads and really get them in trouble-," Rachel started as she let Brittany go.

"Just forget about it Rachel. I'm going to. They're just stupid girls who hate things that they don't understand," Brittany told her softly.

"Well. The offer is there if you two ever need it," Rachel replied with a smile.

"Thanks, Hobbit," Santana's voice came from behind her. Rachel spun around, intending to give Santana an earful about the nickname but was cut off when the Latina swept her into an extremely unexpected hug. "I mean it," she whispered, before releasing her. "Don't tell anyone I did that."

"We all saw it. Admit it Santana, you like my little Jew-Berry," Puck said teasingly. Santana glared at him before looking around. Only the members of the Glee Club were left in the house and they were all watching on with similar expressions of anger and concern.

"Shut up Puck," Santana mumbled, before turning to Brittany. "You ok Britt-Britt?" she asked tenderly.

"Yeah. Tasha gives awesome hugs. And so does Rachel," Brittany told her. The sadness in her eyes receding at the sight of all of their friends, crowded around them in support.

"Speaking of, Tashie you're pretty badass for a cripple," Santana joked, trying to lighten the atmosphere.

"I did tell you that," Natasha said, her voice laced with fake exasperation. "Come on, let's get our drink on, Glee Club styles," she suggested.

"Hell yeah!" Puck cheered.

"I want to play spin the bottle again!" Brittany said, jiggling in excitement. The thought of Brittany kissing other people made Santana's stomach churn but after the night they'd had she would have done anything to make Brittany happy again.

An hour and a half later and most of them were certifiably drunk or at least pleasantly buzzed and they had decided to move on from spin the bottle to truth or dare.

"I dare…I dare," Natasha slurred at Santana. "I dare you to do Brittany's drunken stripper dance!" she cackled so hard she fell over, landing in Lauren's lap. The bigger girl set her back upright and glared at her. "Sorry Lauren," she slurred goofily, leaning against her shoulder for support. "I like you," she stated, eyeballing the other girl comically.

"You all think I'm just going to be a stripper when I grow up!" Santana burst into tears. "I'm smart, and I'm awesome and I'm so hot, and I'm so not going to be a stripper!" she bawled hysterically. Rachel reached over to pat her head like she was a dog.

"Shhh Santana, it's just a dare," she slurred comfortingly. "You don't have to do it."

"You think I can't do it Hobbit?" Santana went from bawling to angry in a heartbeat and Rachel recoiled in fright. Next thing anyone knew the Latina was stripping her clothes off and dancing provocatively on the coffee table in her underwear, mimicking Brittany's stripper-drunk dance.

"Wooo! You're so hot Santana," Brittany cheered happily. Santana sat back in the circle, still in just her underwear.

"My turn," Santana shrieked gleefully. "Hobbit! Truth or dare?"

"Dare!" Rachel shrieked, her pitch almost deafening Santana.

"I dare you to kiss Natasha! With tongue!" Santana burst into giggles as Rachel paled at the dare. Natasha caught Rachel's eye and shrugged lightly, showing that it was no big deal to her. Rachel shrugged back and smiled sloppily as the colour returned to her cheeks. The kiss was brief and Santana burst into tears again when Natasha wasn't mad at her for the dare, crawling into Brittany's lap and curling against her as the blonde clumsily stroked her hair and made shushing noises. Santana quickly fell asleep with the combination of booze and Brittany's soft strokes. The game went on a little longer as club members started falling asleep or passing out one by one. Quinn had literally fallen asleep sitting up and had slowly toppled into Natasha's lap, wrapping her arms unconsciously around the other girl's waist. Natasha and Brittany had fallen asleep leaning against each other with their backs against the couch. Puck was sprawled on the coffee table, snoring loudly and Sam was underneath the same table with his legs sticking out. The others had either managed to find a bed, a couch or a ride home.

Glee!

"Oh man I am so stiff," Quinn complained as she dropped onto Brittany's bed the next morning, rubbing at her neck.

"You're stiff? At least you were lying down to sleep," Natasha whined.

"Both of you shut up," Santana growled as she crawled up the bed buried her face in Brittany's pillow. Her head was throbbing angrily and Quinn and Natasha's whinging wasn't helping matters. Brittany had disappeared into the bathroom as they'd come up the stairs and now she entered her room, with a water bottle and a packet of aspirin.

"Who wants aspirin?" she asked quietly, trying not to make her own head throb any more than it already was.

"God I love you Brittany," Natasha sighed happily. She leaned up on tiptoes and pulled Brittany down slightly to kiss her cheek as she took the aspirin from the blonde, before turning to distribute it amongst the four of them. They passed the water bottle around, taking turns to swallow their pills. They had planned on coming back to Brittany's the night before so Brittany had already had her and Amelia's mattresses pushed together and made up on the floor, just like the last time Natasha had stayed over. Natasha's mind couldn't help but flicker back to that night and it made her shudder.

"Who wants to sleep where?" Brittany asked after a few minutes of silence, interrupting Natasha's trip down memory lane.

"Quinn and I will sleep on the mattress," Natasha replied quickly, wrapping an arm around Quinn and tugging her toward the bed on the floor. Santana lifted her head to look questioningly at her, confused at her lightening fast response. "I know what you two were doing in that bed yesterday," Natasha told her with an exasperated glare. Despite smirking proudly, Santana still had the decency to blush at the statement. Brittany just laughed.

"Oh it's ok. We had to change the sheets 'cos Santana-," she started, only to be interrupted by Santana slapping her leg, hard.

"It's safe!" Santana said quickly; suddenly eternally grateful for having darker Latina skin that hid her blush somewhat. Natasha groaned.

"Ew, ew, ew, ew. TMI Britts. Major TMI," she buried her face in her hands as Quinn buried hers against the back of her shoulder.

"Huh?" Brittany looked totally confused as she searched her friends' faces and rubbed at her stinging leg.

"Too much information," Santana explained, still humiliated. She was saved when Helen stuck her head into Brittany's room.

"Come and have something to eat girls," she told them with a smile.

"Thanks Helen," Santana jumped up and bolted out of the room.

"Thanks Helen," Quinn echoed as she walked past the woman with a small smile. Brittany bolted past, pausing to kiss her Mom's cheek on the way past. Natasha smiled shyly as she walked up to Helen.

"You called Child Services," she said softly.

"I…I did," Helen replied cautiously. She flinched when Natasha lunged forward, her arms wrapping around her waist, her head coming to rest on her chest. She looked down at the scruffy dark hair and carefully hugged back.

"Thank you," Natasha whispered. "No other adult ever cared enough to do that. They all noticed but they all did nothing. I couldn't talk about it and so they didn't ask," Natasha's shaky voice trailed off as she held on tighter to Helen. Tears sprung to the older woman's eyes at the girl's words. She pulled back to look at her, reaching out to cup her cheeks and plant a kiss on her forehead.

"Come on sweetheart. Come and have something to eat," Helen just didn't know what to say to Natasha's words, but it didn't seem to matter to Natasha, she just smiled and allowed herself to be led to the kitchen where the others were already digging into the bacon, eggs and toast that Helen had prepared for them.

"I'm not thrilled about the underage drinking ladies," Helen said as Natasha sat down, helping herself to toast and a piece of bacon. Natasha, Santana and Quinn looked guiltily at their plates but Brittany just laughed.

"You can't talk," she told her mother, staring her down when the older blonde glared at her daughter.

"That's why I said 'I'm not thrilled' instead of 'no more'," Helen told her. "I'm at least happy that you're responsible enough not to drive or anything stupid."

"Like get pregnant," Santana said softly, earning a punch in the arm from Quinn. "Oh I'm sorry. Like get pregnant _again- _Ow fuck!" Santana yelped as Quinn punched the same spot again.

"Santana Lopez! Language!" Helen scolded.

"Sorry," Santana mumbled sheepishly. "That really hurt," she glared at Quinn, who shrugged and put another bite of bacon in her mouth.

"Don't you want eggs Tash?" Brittany asked.

"No thanks," Natasha replied.

"Don't you like them?" the blonde asked curiously. Natasha shook her head a little. "Weird," Brittany commented. "Eggs are awesome." They ate the rest of their meal in silence and headed back to Brittany's room after they did the dishes, sprawling out on their beds. Santana was on her back on Brittany's bed, with Brittany stretched across the bed sideways with her chin on Santana's stomach. The other two were side by side on their backs.

"Can you believe we only have one more year of high school?" Quinn commented randomly.

"I know," Santana replied. "It's kinda scary."

"I can't believe how much has happened in the last three years," Natasha said softly. "I never knew so much drama could fit into such a short amount of time."

"I'll say," Quinn replied, her own voice soft and reflective. Her hand travelled unconsciously to her flat stomach, rubbing gently. Sometimes she still missed the constant companionship of the wriggly little life she had carried inside of her for nearly nine months. Natasha caught the movement and shuffled closer, linking their arms together. Quinn looked up and found three sets of eyes watching her compassionately.

"Do you miss her?" Santana asked softly.

"Sometimes," Quinn replied honestly. "Sometimes she's all I can think about. And I wonder, where she is, how she is, what she's like."

"I miss her too. She liked me," Brittany murmured against Santana's belly. Quinn smiled softly. Brittany had been one of the few club members to have seen baby Beth the night Quinn gave birth to her. The blonde had managed to slip away and sneak into Quinn's room after Santana fell asleep in the waiting room. The dancer had climbed onto Quinn's bed, curling her body around Quinn's as she held her daughter and she had just hugged Quinn and stared at the baby, eventually unable to resist reaching out to hold her little hand. The baby had squeezed Brittany's thumb for the longest time and the blonde had decided that that was a sign of the baby's affection toward her. Brittany's silent support had meant the world to Quinn that night. It still meant the world to Quinn. Where everyone else had continuously told Quinn that she was doing the right thing or that it was her decision to make or that she was brave and courageous for choosing to give her up, Brittany had just sat silently, supporting her as she said the hardest goodbye of her young life.

"Yeah she did B," Quinn replied after a few moments.

"She was beautiful Q. I never told you she was beautiful. She looked just like you," Brittany lifted her head to look at Quinn, searching hazel eyes. Quinn just smiled sadly, tears pooling in her eyes and trickling slowly down her cheeks. Natasha cuddled closer and wiped at them with her sleeve.

"I never saw her," Santana said quietly. She had never even seen a photo of the baby. Quinn pulled out of Natasha's grip and grabbed her bag where it sat on the floor. She pulled out her wallet and reached into it, pulling something out. She ran her fingers over it before leaning over Natasha and offering it to Santana. The Latina took it gently. It was one of those wallet sized booklets for keeping business cards in. Santana looked at Quinn carefully before opening the book. It was filled with photos. They were mostly just of Beth, but there were a few with Quinn in them too and one near the back of Beth and Puck. She smiled when she flipped to the last photo; a black and white close up of a tiny fist wrapped around a pale thumb that Santana immediately recognised as Brittany's. Santana stared at it for the longest time before she handed the little book back to Quinn, who handed it to Natasha to look at. She sat silently awhile as Natasha looked at the pictures. Natasha grinned and handed the book back to Quinn.

"Gorgeous," Natasha said softly as Quinn put the book away. Quinn smiled sadly and picked at her nails. She never even saw Santana move until the Latina's arms were around her from behind, her chin on her shoulder. Quinn tilted her head so that her cheek pressed against Santana's temple, smiling slightly at the familiar position.

"Oof! Jesus Britt!" Natasha grunted. Brittany had evidently wanted in on the hugging and had launched herself off of the bed and onto Natasha, almost smothering the smaller girl in a Brittany-hug. After a few seconds she shifted to lie next to Natasha who shuffled to the edge of the bed to give her more room. Santana and Quinn lay down on the other side, squishing them all onto the too small bed in a row. "I couldn't have gotten through all this shit without you guys y'know," Natasha suddenly said quietly. "I couldn't have. I'd have given up. I'd have given in and let it strip me of who I am. I'd have let it turn me into someone bitter and jaded and I'd have crumbled under the strain of it all." Natasha had sat up as she spoke, her eyes flicking from blue, to hazel to chocolate brown and back again. "And he really would have won."

"You're stronger than you give yourself credit for Natasha. You'd never have let him win. You'd have gotten through with or without us," Santana said, conviction in her voice.

"No," Natasha shook her head vehemently. "I don't know if Brittany told you about what happened with Karofsky?" she asked. At the two nods she received she continued. "Everyone saw it happen, everyone knew that wasn't a normal reaction to what he had done. But they just stood there. Not that I was expecting anyone to do anything. They knew something was wrong but they chose to ignore it. Like everyone at my last school. Then Brittany was there. And she was worried and even when I ran away she followed. She made me show her my ribs and she cared about what had happened. She saw through the excuses and she was worried. I could see it in her eyes. Do you remember the day I sang that first song in Glee?" Natasha was staring hard at Santana, almost willing her to remember.

"I remember," Santana nodded, recalling her conversation with Brittany after the girl had sang, Brittany reading more into the song and Natasha's body language than any of the others.

"I was planning to kill myself that weekend. He was taking mom and Jem shopping and I'd been told I wasn't allowed to leave the house. I was going to kill myself while they were gone," Natasha's voice cracked. "I wasn't safe at home and I had nowhere else to go. Everyone at school hated me and I knew it was only a matter of time before someone found out what I did at my old school and started throwing it in my face. I had no-one. I was scared and alone and I was so tired," Natasha shook a little as she remembered the way she had felt back then. "Then later that day as I was leaving, Brittany walked up to me in the hallway and pushed a piece of paper into my hand. It had her address and phone number on it. She told me that if something was wrong that I could come to her, anytime, and that if she couldn't help me that you guys would and if you guys couldn't help then we could all find someone who would." Natasha looked Quinn and Santana in the eyes as her hand sought Brittany's tangling their fingers together. "It was a simple gesture, but it meant the world to me. Someone one saw me, but not only that, someone actually cared enough to try and help. She offered me a safe place to go. No one ever did that before. It shook me. I sat there that weekend and I tried to work up the courage to end it. But I couldn't. Someone cared about me and I just couldn't bring myself to do it. You were so nice to me B, and you were so genuine. The next time he attacked me," Natasha sucked in a wobbly emotional breath. "The only face I wanted to see was yours," Natasha's voice fully cracked now and the next sentence came out amongst broken sobs. "You all showed me so much love and care that night, and I am so, so grateful." Brittany sat up and wrapped her arms around her friend, pulling her body against hers and burying her face in her neck as her own tears spilled over. Santana and Quinn were both in tears too, they were both shocked and stunned at how drastically their simple actions had changed the life of the girl in front of them.

"I knew things were bad," Brittany whispered, pulling back to search green eyes. "I could see it in your eyes. It was all I could think of to do to help and I just hoped it'd be enough."

"It was more than enough Britt. It was everything," Natasha told her, reaching up to wipe at her tears, then hugging her tightly. "And I can never thank you enough. Any of you." she pulled back and smiled at her friends. Quinn and Brittany offered watery smiles in return. But Santana wouldn't look at her, she stared at her hands, her throat and jaw were working as she tried not to cry. Natasha climbed over Quinn and Santana until she was kneeling on the floor beside the bed. She put her arms around Santana, hugging tightly.

"I told her to stay away from you. I told her you were a loser and an idiot and she should stay away from you if she wanted to stay friends," Santana's voice was surprisingly calm. "What if she had?" she asked, her composure slipping now.

"She never would have," Quinn replied. "You know that."

"And she didn't. 'What ifs' are no good to you now Santana. They'll just make you crazy," Natasha told her gently. "We shouldn't focus on the things that could have happened; we should focus on what did happen and how far we've all come since then." Suddenly she took a deep breath. "It's getting depressing in here!" she stated, arching an eyebrow. Santana managed a smile and wiped her eyes.

"We should watch Anchorman!" Brittany said excitedly, her baby blues lighting up at the idea.

"Oh totally," Santana replied.

"I'm in," Quinn and Natasha said in unison.

"Yay!" Brittany jumped up and went to put the movie on. Natasha leaned in and kissed Santana's forehead then her cheek before she climbed over her, wriggling obnoxiously in between her and Quinn, grinning cheekily when Quinn mock glared at her. She linked her arms with theirs and pulled them tighter to her. Brittany bounded back over with the remote and stretched out on her bed. Santana detangled herself from Natasha and moved to join her, kissing her lips sweetly before curling into the taller girl's arms. Quinn and Natasha exchanged a smile at their antics.

Later, as the end credits rolled Brittany and Santana were asleep and Quinn's eyes were drooping heavily as Natasha gently prised the remote from Brittany's hand and turned the DVD player off.

"Tash?" Quinn said sleepily.

"Yeah?" Natasha replied softly.

"This year is going to be amazing. We have to make it amazing. We all deserve it," Quinn told her.

"Yeah we do," Natasha nodded.

"We just have to put all of the crap aside and just enjoy it. Whatever happens," Quinn gazed almost desperately at Natasha, pleading for her to understand. She knew that she and Natasha had both had a rough couple of years and she so desperately wanted her last year of high school to be a good one.

"It's not going to be easy Quinn. Especially for them," she gestured to the two girls tangled up in each other in the bed beside them.

"I know," Quinn nodded.

"But we're better than that. We're stronger than the people who give us shit. Most of them have no idea what we have all overcome and we need to remember that. What didn't kill us these past few years has made us so much stronger," Natasha told her with a sweet smile. "It won't be easy but we'll stick together and we'll make it through." Quinn smiled back and closed her eyes, quickly drifting off to sleep. As Natasha lay in the quiet room, the sounds of her friends' soft breathing lulling her closer to sleep, Natasha couldn't wipe the smile off of her face. She wished that this moment would last forever, lying here; happy and carefree in a room with the three people she loved more than anything else in the world. For now her life was stable, safe for the first time in a long time. She was happy, contented. Granted she still had regrets but who truthfully comes through their life without regret? For the first time in her life Natasha felt like her life had promise, a future where anything was possible. Quinn shifted in her sleep and stretched out against Natasha's side and Natasha hoped for her sake that the new school year would be everything that Quinn wanted it to be and more. They couldn't get back what had been taken from them but they could move on from it and be better and stronger for it. As Natasha felt herself slip into the warm grasp of sleep a smile crept across her lips. Right now? Life was pretty damn close to perfect.

Glee!

I hope you've enjoyed reading this as much as I have enjoyed writing it for you. Hopefully I'll be able to get the epilogue up sometime in the next few weeks and then it'll be complete. It's been a hell of a ride and I wish I could personally thank each and every one of you who had read, reviewed, favourited and alerted but alas, I can't so this will have to do: THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU ALL! You are all amazing and the reception this fic has gotten has been unreal. Thank you!


	25. Epilogue

Appearances

**A/N:** It's been a long time coming but here it is. The Epilogue. Thanks to everyone who has faved and alerted the story and me, it's meant a lot to me. This has been a long and winding journey and while I'm kind of sad to see the end of it I'm kind of happy to move on from it as well. On to other things…speaking of which if anyone has ideas/prompts they would like written up, PM me or leave me a note in a review on this fic and I'll give it a go for you :-)…thanks again for reading and all of the lovely reviews.

Oh and for the purposes of this chapter they were all in the same year at school, including Jacob Ben Israel.

Also…long Epilogue is long…over 10k words in fact…

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Glee…

Glee!

Epilogue:

_McKinley High School Auditorium, 2022._

"I truly hope that you can all keep that in your minds, in case a situation like this ever does arise in your life, so that you can hopefully change the life of someone who feels like they have nowhere else to go and no options left to get out of a bad situation. I was so incredibly lucky to have had the people around me that I did. If I hadn't the outcome would have been very, very different. Sooner or later Cameron would have snapped, regardless of where we were and who we knew," Natasha breathed deeply to settle her jumpy heart before continuing. "If it hadn't been for these girls reaching out to me then my sister would have had no one that she felt she could trust enough to call that night. If it hadn't been for them…we never would have got to that night. I'd have ended it long before then," she said candidly. "I'm not ashamed to admit that I was someone who felt like I had no options left."

Natasha looked out at the packed auditorium, seeing her Mom, Dad and Jemimah sitting with Santana, Quinn and Brittany in the front row. The rest of the Glee Club was there too, as well as Mr Schuester, Ms. Pillsbury-Schuester (she still refused to just change her name, much to the original New Direction members' amusement) and surprisingly, Coach Sylvester.

"This isn't the first time I have spoken to a group of high school students about this. But it's the first time I have done it back here at McKinley. This is the first time any of my family or friends have been here to hear it. So I want to change it up a bit and I want to say, to everyone involved back then: Thank you. Thank you, from the bottom of my heart. Thank you to Coach Sylvester and Mr Schue for coming to my rescue that night. Thank you to Ms. Pillsbury-Schuester for all of her loving words to me throughout the rest of my school days here, I know I was kind of resistant to them at the time but they really did mean so much to me. And they have stuck with me. Thank you to my Mom, my Dad and my little brother and sister, for letting me heal, for letting me go through what I had to go through to get to a point where I could cope with everything, for putting up with so much crap from me during my darker days and for never losing faith in me. Thank you to Rachel, Puck, Finn, Lauren, Kurt, Tina, Mercedes, Blaine, Artie, Sam and Mike, for just being there, for picking me up when I was down and for providing so many laughs and good times to cheer me up. You guys are all so awesome…" Natasha took a deep breath. "But most of all I want to take this opportunity to thank Brittany, Santana and Quinn. There aren't enough words in the English language, or any language for that matter, that can convey my gratefulness to the three of you. You were pulling me out of the darkness, even before the worst of it hit. You showed so much love and compassion to someone you barely even knew. As long as I live I will never forget how safe and loved I felt that night at Brittany's. I can't put into words how it feels to feel like you have nowhere to go and then to have someone give you a place, a place that's safe, where you don't have to lie, but you don't have to explain either, a place where you can just be. It meant everything to me. It means everything to me. Wherever we are and whatever we do; you three will always be my safe place. Always. I love you guys," Natasha finished, shrugging shyly, her nose slightly scrunched as she grinned. The auditorium burst into applause at the woman's display gratitude.

"Ok, ok," she giggled shyly into the microphone. "I have a little more time, does anyone have questions? Or comments?" she asked. A young girl near the front raised her hand. "Yeah?" Natasha asked, gesturing at her.

"I just wanted to say that you're really brave standing up there and telling your story. You're really inspiring and I love that you've taken an awful situation and used it to do something really, really good in the world. And your friends sound awesome," the girl added with a grin.

"Aw thanks," Natasha beamed, her eyes welling up. "And yeah, they are." The girl sat down and a boy further back put up his hand. "Yes," Natasha indicated at him with a smile. Natasha answered a couple of questions and fielded lots of comments about her bravery for the next half hour until the bell rang, signalling the end of her time with the students. She was packing up her laptop and chatting with Quinn when a young boy approached her.

"Uh, excuse me Miss Isaacs?" he asked timidly, staring at his converse sneakers.

"Yes?" Natasha asked politely.

"I..I just wanted to thank you. I used to go to school in New York and you presented there one day. My dad was beating me and my Mom up at the time. People noticed but no one did anything. After you came and talked about what happened to you my friends told the teachers and they called the cops. They threw my dad in lockup and my mom moved us here to get a fresh start. If it wasn't for you sharing your story, we'd still be in that house," The boy never looked up from his feet.

"I…I…," Natasha struggled to find the words. "I'm so glad to hear that," she finally told him softly.

"I was wondering if…maybe it's inappropriate," the boy shrugged before finally looking Natasha in the eye. "But I was wondering if maybe I could give you a thank you hug?" he asked shyly. Natasha felt the lump in her throat and tears welling in her eyes as she carefully held out her arms. The boy cautiously stepped into them and gave Natasha an almost bone crushing hug. "Thank you," he whispered next to her ear. He let her go and smiled at her brightly before turning to walk away. "Bye," he called over his shoulder. Natasha managed to say a shaky 'Goodbye' back, still wrestling with her emotions.

"I guess that's why you continue to put yourself through this," Quinn said softly from behind her. Natasha nodded, not trusting her voice yet. Quinn stepped up behind her and wrapped her arms around her waist, planting a kiss on Natasha's cheek before resting her chin on her shoulder. She held her tightly as she fought to get back in control of herself. Quinn had been getting more and more exasperated lately with Natasha's determination to make the best of her situation by helping others, seemingly at the expense of her own happiness. After every presentation so far Natasha had wound up crying herself to sleep, curled up in a tiny little ball on the end of Quinn's bed. It was exhausting for both of them but Natasha insisted that if she could help one person, it would be worth it. She also claimed it was therapeutic, so when Figgins had offered her the chance to present to William McKinley High while they were in town for their ten year reunion Natasha had jumped at it. Quinn had sighed and begun preparing herself for the emotional fallout. She had the feeling it'd be a lot harder for her, talking about this back where most of it had happened.

"You ok there Warrior Princess?" Puck asked gently as he walked up. Quinn smiled at him and squeezed Natasha tighter to her.

"I'm good Puck," Natasha replied, smiling at him.

"You did good up there," he told her, reaching out to wipe away a stray tear that was about to drip off of her chin with his thumb.

"Thanks," Natasha smiled.

"Threesome?" he asked with a lecherous smirk, sending Natasha into a fit of hysterical laughter.

"Puckerman, fuck!" Santana cursed from behind him, reaching out to slap the back of his head, hard. "You have a wife you asshole." Puck just laughed and walked away with a small wave. Santana rolled her eyes after him with a grin before turning to her friends. "We're all going to Rachel's Dads' place to drink, catch up and reminisce all night," she told them.

"Sweet," Natasha extracted herself from Quinn's grip, picking up her laptop bag before slinging an arm around Santana's waist. Santana kissed her temple and Quinn couldn't help but smile at the easy affection between the two of them. Being back here she couldn't help but think of the way they used to be and how much had changed in ten years.

Glee!

Back at Rachel's, the original New Directions members all sat around in the basement, catching up. Their various significant others had all gone and left them to their catch up session. They were all talking about where they were at today. Natasha, Santana, Quinn, Brittany, Rachel, Blaine and Kurt were all in New York. Brittany and Natasha had opened a small performing arts school together and taught dance and singing classes, while Santana was working as an orthopaedic surgeon. Brittany and Santana had gotten married three years after leaving school and had a three year old daughter Mikaeli who was currently at Santana's parents' house. Natasha had been with her current girlfriend Alannah for nearly three years.

Quinn was working as an Assistant District Attorney, mostly prosecuting homicides. It was heavy work and she had deflected most of the questions her old friends had asked with a sad little smile. It was an emotionally difficult job but Quinn truly believed that she was making a difference in the world by putting away some of the most violent criminals in the city. Her and Natasha were incredibly close and Quinn was firmly of the opinion that she would be in a padded room somewhere if it wasn't for Natasha's (and Santana and Brittany's) unwavering love and support. Her boyfriend of a year, Rob, was a chef, who owned and ran Quinn's favourite restaurant.

Rachel, as everyone had known she would be, was now a star on Broadway. She had had lead roles in several amazing plays, her current play, which had run for the last two years and showed no signs of ending anytime soon, had been a hit from the start with people all over the world coming to see it. The man she married had come as a surprise to most of her friends (and her Dads as Natasha had found out during one hilarious drunken night), they had always thought she would marry another actor, her own leading man. But she had fallen in love with the lighting director of the play and married him six years ago. They had a four year old son Jayden who had told Rachel at age two and a half that he was going to marry Mikaeli Lopez-Pierce, much to Brittany's delight and Santana's apparent horror.

Kurt had had a few small roles on Broadway before realising that that actually wasn't what he wanted to do with his life. He was now an interior designer, designing for the stars. He still popped up on stage every now and then and often came to teach Brittany and Natasha's students a thing or two about singing. The younger singing groups loved it when Kurt came in and hit those high notes for them. His relationship with Blaine had ended roughly and after five years of no contact they had run into each other at one of Rachel's shows and had put the past crap aside and become firm friends again. Blaine was teaching English at a nice private school and was getting some recognition as a writer. Both had gotten married, Blaine three years ago and Kurt just one year ago.

After leaving Ohio, Puck had, in his own words, boned his way through half of the women in California before settling down in LA as a mechanic, restoring vintage cars in his spare time. He had met his partner Kate four years ago and they had two sons, Jacob who had just turned two and five month old Riley. He had settled down a lot since high school, and the former Glee Clubbers had given him a good ribbing and a round of 'I told you so!' when he had told them that he had chased Kate for a long time, but that she had only agreed to start seeing him after he had started thinking with the correct head and had finally stopped referring to himself in the third person as 'the Puckasaurus' and 'Puckzilla'.

Finn had taken over Burt Hummel's shop and had settled down in Lima with a Cheerio he had started dating senior year and they already had four kids; Samantha, eight, Toby, five and a half, Lacey, two and Georgia 6 months. He also worked part time at McKinley teaching students to play the drums.

Mike and Tina had moved to LA together and split up shortly after. It was an amicable split though and they were still friends. Both had broken into Hollywood, with Mike working as a choreographer on several movies and reality shows and Tina finding her niche as a makeup artist specialising in special effects make-up and prosthetics. Mike had a steady girlfriend of two years and Tina was quite happily single.

Sam was also in LA, writing and producing an Avatar inspired sci-fi TV series that he had created. The special effects company Tina worked for had the makeup contract for the show and Tina herself had actually done some work for him. Sam was briefly married to an actress/dancer on the show named Heather but had split with her after two years. He was now dating one of his production assistants.

Lauren had gotten a pro wrestling contract and was still all over the country winning championships. She had been selected for the Olympic Women's Wrestling team and had won a silver medal. She had a boyfriend of five years who she seemed to greatly enjoy bossing around, much like she had Puck in high school. They were all pleased to find that she had mellowed out a lot since high school.

Artie was working as a medical researcher, specifically researching and studying spinal cord injuries. He was working in a facility in Dallas, Texas and had met his wife of two years, a fellow researcher, there. Gina was five months pregnant with their first child, but had been unable to come on the trip with Artie due to work.

Mercedes had gone to LA chasing a recording contract. She had worked damn hard for a long time before it all paid off. Six years after leaving McKinley she released a single that had hit number one on the charts in the US, the UK, Australia and New Zealand. Since then she had released two hit albums and was currently working on her third. She was currently single after breaking it off with her manager who she had been dating.

Mr Schuester had married Emma Pillsbury and they had a son and a daughter together Brady, seven, and Laura, five. Emma had just returned to McKinley part time after being a stay at home mom to the kids until Laura started kindergarten. Mr Schue was still coaching the New Directions, who had won Nationals four times since their first win in 2012.

Sue Sylvester had pulled a Houdini after her second loss at Cheerleading Nationals that same year and had seemingly disappeared off of the face of the planet. She had turned up back at McKinley four years later demanding her coaching job back. Figgins had refused because they already had a coach but after said coach was mysteriously injured in a hit and run, he had given in and Sue had taken over the Cheerios again. They had won six consecutive national championships since then. There were several conspiracy theories about where Sue had been those four years – all of them probably started by Sue herself – but no one actually knew for sure. She hadn't changed much and if anything she had become _more _deranged as the years wore on. At one point that morning the group had heard her screaming a new version of one of her classic lines at some poor Cheerio that had messed up the routine. "You think this is hard? Try being swallowed whole by a python and then climbing back out! That's hard!" The former glee clubbers had found it almost comforting to find that the woman was still as bat shit crazy as she had ever been.

Glee!

"It's weird right? Us all being back here. I feel all nostalgic!" Rachel laughed. They had finished catching up on each others' lives and there had been a lull in the conversation when Rachel spoke.

"I know. We had some epic Glee Club parties here senior year while your Dads were away," Puck grinned at the tiny brunette. "Remember that one when you caught Brittany and Santana doing it in the bathroom?" Rachel cringed at the memory, while Santana threw her head back and laughed her ass off across the room.

"You screamed so loud we all went running up the stairs at top speed because we thought someone was trying to murder you," Kurt told her, trying to stay serious but cracking a smile at the last minute.

"Thanks for refreshing that trauma in my mind," Rachel shook her head.

"Why is it that most of my senior year party memories have something to do with those two doing it?" Finn asked, glaring over at the women in question. Santana smirked her old arrogant smirk while Brittany just giggled, completely unashamed.

"Not just party memories," Natasha commented from where she was snuggled against Kurt's side. "Who remembers Nationals senior year?" she grinned.

"When we almost lost because we almost didn't get on stage in time, because we couldn't find Brittany and San- EW!" Rachel cut herself off when she realised Natasha's implication. "That's why we couldn't find you? You almost cost us Nationals because you were _doing it_?" she yelled incredulously.

"Well actually we found them in plenty of time," Natasha told her. "We were almost too late because Britts, Quinn and I were trying to haul Santana off of Puckerman before she murdered him because she caught him videoing them on his iPhone," she explained.

"Motherfucker!" Santana spat venomously from across the room. She was still pissed about that one.

"Unbelievable," Rachel shook her head in disbelief.

"The best part of that trip was when we all got drunk at the hotel and Puckerman streaked buck naked through the dining room," Mercedes spoke up, sending them all into fits of hysterical laughter at the memory. Natasha and Rachel – who had loosened up considerably throughout senior year – had snuck the booze in and while Mr Schue had left them to their own devices to go out to dinner with Emma they had gotten absolutely hammered. It was only 8pm and they were playing truth or dare. Santana had dared Puck to 'shave Finn's junk' (as payback for him daring her to grope Rachel's boobs for a full minute) and he had chosen to do the forfeit, which was supposed to be streaking naked down the hallway and back. Puck being Puck had had to take it one step further and had run down the stairs and through the hotel dining room without a stitch of clothing on.

"Man Mr Schue had to do some serious damage control that night," Finn laughed.

"Yes I did," came a voice from the stairs. Mr Schue grinned down at them. "Mind if I join you?" He was met with an enthusiastic invitation to sit down and as soon as he did, Finn handed him a beer. "I'm so proud of all of you, you've all come so far in your lives," Mr Schue said fondly. "I have to say I've had a lot of kids come and go in Glee Club and each group has been awesome and had its characters and its drama, but none of them have been nearly as outrageous as you lot were." He was met with a chorus of cheers and laughter. "I'm serious. You lot take the cake. I still wonder how I didn't completely lose my mind. I mean, I thought senior year once you all got over the backstabbing and lying and the practically incestuous partner swapping that you'd all settle down and things would go smoothly. But the better you all got along the worse your misbehaviour got!" he shook his head when they all laughed. "The grey hair," Mr Schue pointed to his head. "That was you guys doing!" he laughed.

"Hey at least we gave you good work stories to tell Mr Schue!" Artie told him.

"Well that's true," the teacher agreed.

"Remember the camping trip?" Natasha asked and the whole room burst into laughter again. As a last trip together as a group, Mr Schue had hired a cabin on a lake and taken the glee club camping there.

"Oh lord!" Mr Schue shook his head. "Please don't bring that up in front of Emma. She still hasn't recovered." The whole room laughed again.

"Poor woman was horrified," Natasha wiped at her eyes.

"Whose idea was it to go skinny dipping at 3am?" Schue asked. His eyes bugged when Quinn sheepishly put up her hand.

"That would be me," she giggled.

"And _that_, ladies and gentlemen, is why we don't leave Q unsupervised with a bottle of Petron!" Santana announced. Quinn blushed. She had had far too much to drink and had thought it would be a brilliant idea to skinny dip. She had done it first and then dared the rest of them to follow suit. Santana, Brittany, Puck, Tina, Natasha, Finn and Rachel had agreed to do it and when Ms. Pillsbury had come out to investigate the racket they were making she had unfortunately gotten in the path of the seven naked teenagers who were barrelling toward the lake at full speed. She hadn't been as germ-a-phobic at that stage but apparently that many naked bodies brushing past her had still been a bit much. It had taken Mr Schue all night to calm her down.

"I still can't believe you didn't check our bags for booze Mr Schue," Puck laughed. "I mean after Nationals we were sure you'd be onto us."

"Evidently I was far too trusting. After that night, I learned," Mr Schue sighed in exasperation.

"That last night was awesome though," Brittany said quietly. It was the first time she had spoken in ages, having been content to snuggle into Santana and listen to the others talk.

"Yeah it was," Natasha sighed, shifting away from Kurt and reaching out to link pinkies with Brittany. The last night of the trip they had all dragged their sleeping bags out and laid under the stars. None of them had gone to sleep until nearly 5am, content to just lie there talking about anything and everything. They all went quiet for a bit, remembering.

"So is Sue still hell-bent on destroying the glee club?" Mercedes asked.

"She goes through phases," Mr Schue told her. "For the past six months she's been trying her damndest to get the football team disbanded," he groaned.

"What? Why?" Finn asked incredulously.

"Who knows? She just up and decided that it was a waste of time. We did remind her that if she disbanded the football team then the Cheerios would have no one to cheer for but that didn't seem to bother her this time," he rolled his eyes.

"Woman is nuts. Does anyone know where she went when she pulled her Houdini?" Santana asked.

"No idea. There are a lot of theories, each one more ridiculous than the last. Last month I heard her telling the Cheerios that she was 'hiding in the Amazon trying to figure out how to clone herself in order to create an army of Sues for the purpose of complete world domination'," he told them.

"Maybe she was checked into a psychiatric facility somewhere?" Natasha asked with a laugh.

"Nah, they'd never have let her out," Mercedes deadpanned.

"She possibly should be in a psychiatric facility somewhere," Quinn replied dryly.

"Possibly?" Brittany asked sceptically, causing everyone to laugh.

"Hey Brittany what was up with your dumb blonde act in high school?" Mr Schue asked the blonde. "You don't seem so spacey now." The blonde shrugged sadly.

"It wasn't an act. It was a dissociative disorder. I had a lot of horrible crap going on in my life from when I was little. My Dad left then came back, then left again and then came back again just in time for us to watch him die of cancer. I kind of just withdrew into my own little world to get away from it. It was just easier that way," she told them. "Tash had the same thing for a while after we left school and when they explained why she was doing it Santana realised I was doing the same thing. So we both got treated, together."

"I'm sorry Britt," Schue apologised, realising he had touched on something a lot more serious than he had thought. He had been aware that Natasha had had a hideous few years after high school as he and Emma were quite good friends with her mom and she had kept him posted, but he hadn't known about Brittany. Natasha had done really well in therapy for a while but then all of a sudden it had been like it had all caught up with her at once. She had been diagnosed with post traumatic stress disorder and for a while it had seemed like even Santana, Quinn and Brittany wouldn't be able to save her from the self destructive downward spiral she had gotten caught in. It had been Quinn who had gotten through in the end - and just in the nick of time too - and the two had been practically inseparable ever since.

"Shit happens," Brittany shrugged in reply, a small smile pulling at the corner of her lips. Santana reached up and turned her wife's face toward her to kiss her softly, before nuzzling her face against the blonde's neck comfortingly. Mr Schue smiled at the affectionate display.

"You know I always hoped you two would be forever," he said softly. "You overcame so much to be together. You climbed all of the obstacles in your way when most kids would have given up and moved on because it was just too hard. You two restored my faith in love," he smiled at them.

"Aww, you are such a sap Mr Schue," Mercedes teased as Santana and Brittany blushed.

"Do you guys realise that we were like, _the_ gayest glee club ever?" Natasha asked, breaking the moment and sending the room into fits of laughter again.

"I guess we were," Mr Schue agreed with a chuckle.

"Five out of fourteen is pretty impressive," Blaine nodded, sipping his beer. Puck suddenly sniggered from where he was sitting, his eyes far away, obviously remembering something.

"Getting high at Santana's eighteenth?" Rachel asked knowingly, quickly figuring out the connection he had made.

"Totally," Puck laughed uproariously. Rachel, who had been stoned out of her gourd after Natasha had talked her into trying it, had ended up passionately making out with Quinn on a dare…which Natasha had also talked her into. She had then freaked out big time and managed to sneak out of the house undetected, sparking a glee club, town wide man hunt for the small brunette. They had wound up calling Mr Schue to help them look so that Rachel's Dads wouldn't kill them all for losing their only child.

"Oh my God Lou was so pissed when she came home!" Natasha shook her head before putting a hand over her eyes, remembering Louisa Lopez's fury at finding the entire glee club drunk and stoned in her living room.

"She's still pissed about that," Santana shuddered. At a couple of questioning looks the Latina elaborated. "Every time I do something that annoys her – which is often - she brings that up."

"I can't say I blame her, I'm not thrilled either," Mr Schue piped up. "It took me two hours to coax Rachel into my car after we finally found her wandering around the streets at three am! And then once I got her home it took me and both of her fathers another hour to coax her out of the car and into the house." He was met with gales of laughter.

"How did you even get out of my house without us noticing?" Santana asked the smaller girl curiously.

"I have no idea," Rachel replied ruefully. "All I remember is making out with Quinn and then freaking out, then riding in Mr Schue's car and then my Dad yelling at me, while I tried to keep a straight face because Daddy was trying desperately not to laugh his ass off behind him. Oh and I remember Britt yelling hysterically because she thought you guys had broken Tasha's brain."

"Broken her brain?" Mr Schue asked, staring questioningly at Brittany as the others burst out laughing again.

"She was sitting by the window staring out and we could _not_ get her attention. She was light-years away. She wouldn't respond to us talking to her or shaking her, she wouldn't even blink," Brittany replied.

"Where did you guys even get weed?" Mr Schue asked.

"Puckerman," everyone said in unison as Puck raised his hand.

"Where did you get it?" Mr Schue asked Puck.

"Chronic Lady," Puck replied, waggling his eyebrows.

"Ah, Sandy Ryerson. Probably should have figured that out myself," Mr Schuester rolled his eyes.

"Oh speaking of former teachers, guess who I saw the other day in one of the clubs we frequent?" Natasha piped up.

"Who?' several people asked.

"Holly Holliday," Natasha replied with a grin.

"Holly?" Mr Schue said incredulously. "How is she?"

"She said she was good but…she's still chewing through guys and refusing to be tied down. She's still subbing," Natasha told him. "Still bubbly and crazy which was nice to see. I always wondered if she might go the bitter and twisted route like Sue."

"God. I haven't seen her in years," Mr Schue shook his head. Silence settled over the group as they remembered their favourite crazy blonde substitute.

"Do you guys ever miss this?" Tina finally asked. "High school, I mean." She was met with a slow chorus of yes' almost all of them had an unspoken 'but…' after them.

"I guess I miss parts of it. I miss us all being together, the way we were senior year, when we put the drama aside and got along," Rachel told them after a long pause. "I don't miss the previous years," she almost whispered, looking down at her hands. Santana and Quinn looked away guiltily, while Brittany shot an apologetic look at the brunette. Natasha untangled herself from Kurt long enough to reach over him and grab Rachel's hand, pulling it up to plant a kiss on the back of it.

"I miss that too Rach," Brittany replied. "And we truly are sorry. You know we love you right?" she asked sadly, blue eyes gazing imploring into Rachel's brown.

"Yeah I know," she smiled softly. "And I do forgive you, for all of it. It's just not so easy to forget is all," Rachel explained.

"I miss us all hanging out like this," Finn spoke up, interrupting the sad moment. He grinned at the chorus of 'Me too' that followed.

Glee

The reunion itself was a hilarious mess of an evening. It started out well, the old cliques had all reunited and caught up on each others' lives. Quinn, Natasha, Brittany and Santana had caught up with the Cheerios for a bit before their night was disrupted by Sue and her bullhorn.

"You're all failures!" She yelled through the bullhorn at the group of Cheerios. "All of you, except for Q, Natasha, Tweedle Dumb and Airbags. They all learned that you have to be exceptional if you want to get anywhere in this world. Airbags is an orthopaedic surgeon, Brittany and Natasha's performing arts school has put out five top cheerleaders in the last two years alone and Q is putting murders and rapists in prison. The rest of you are average! And average equals failure in the Sue Sylvester book of life! Look at you all. Housewives and office workers…You should be ashamed!" she ranted. Santana glared at the resurrection of Sue's favourite insulting nickname.

"Uh I'm a cheerleader for the Dallas Cowboys," one girl spoke up, offended. Everyone else knew better than to bother.

"Failure!" Sue yelled through the bullhorn, before turning on her heel and heading toward Rachel, leaving the former Cheerios rolling their eyes at her retreating back.

"Well she's in fine form tonight," Natasha said casually, her lips quirking up at the end as she watched Sue move to stand over Rachel, clearly with the intent to intimidate the tiny woman.

"Berry! You managed to get out in the world and not become a complete failure. I'm vaguely impressed…but still; your very presence in this world offends me!" Sue ranted at Rachel before catching sight of someone else she felt the need to harass.

"I wouldn't have expected anything less from her," one of the other girls commented. Natasha looked across their circle to smile at the girl when she noticed who was standing next to the other girl. She smiled shyly at Jennika, who smiled back widely and waved. Natasha and Jennika had stayed together through their senior year but had both had very separate dreams. Natasha wanted to go to New York and teach dance with Brittany, while Jennika had wanted to go to LA to study to become a teacher. They had made the heartbreaking decision to break it off instead of trying to pursue a relationship cross-country and they hadn't seen or been in contact with each other since. Natasha waved back before ducking out of the circle and around to stand next to the other girl.

"Hey," she said shyly.

"Hi," Jennika beamed. She hesitantly opened her arms and stepped toward the other girl. Natasha hesitated before stepping forward and wrapping Jennika in a hug. "I've missed you," Jennika whispered, hugging the smaller girl tightly.

"I've missed you too," Natasha said shakily, realising that she actually had.

"So did you bring this lovely lady of yours with you?" Jennika asked with a grin.

"Nope," Natasha smiled back. "She had to work. She wanted to come though," she explained.

"Oh that's too bad. Mine had to work too," Jennika replied. The two women made awkward small talk for a while, talking about their partners, their jobs, Jennika's two adopted daughters, and the current government. They soon ran out of superficial small talk and lulled into awkward silence. After a moment Jennika suddenly grabbed Natasha's hand, leading her away from the group a little before reaching up to cup Natasha's cheek tenderly, causing Natasha to tense up and break off eye contact, suddenly nervous. "It broke my heart walking away from you that day. Actually, scratch that, it absolutely shattered my heart into a million jagged pieces walking away from you that day," she said softly. "It destroyed me. It still destroys me. But, and I don't mean for this to sound awful, I'd do it all over again to get to where I am now. I wouldn't change a thing," Jennika dropped her hand from Natasha's cheek to grab her hand and give it a squeeze.

"I feel exactly the same," Natasha smiled and exhaled shakily. "My life is amazing. I think Lani is truly the love of my life. Breaking things off with you like that was absolutely horrendous, but if you and I hadn't ended things they way we did, I never would have found her. I really did love you. I think I still do in a way. I'd love if we could keep in contact," she finished nervously.

"I'd like that," Jennika beamed. Natasha couldn't help but smile back. Without that tension between them the conversation became easier and soon Brittany had wandered over and joined in, tired of listening to Santana regaling the jocks with stories about the gnarly injuries she had treated while working at the hospital.

"Uh, can I have your attention please," Figgins' voice echoed through the auditorium. People stopped talking and turned to face the stage. "It is my honour to welcome you all, the McKinley High School Senior class of two thousand and twelve, back to McKinley for your ten years high school reunion," Figgins spoke in his awkward phrasing. "And now the McKinley High New Directions will perform a song to welcome you back," he grabbed his mic and walked off of the stage. The current New Directions group performed a fairly average rendition of a pop song while Mr Schue watched on with a frustrated look on his face. Once the performance was over one of the girls grabbed the microphone from Figgins.

"Um on behalf of New Directions, we would like to welcome you all back to McKinley. We would also like to invite the original New Directions up to sing a song if they'd like to," she said in a very bored voice. "Mr Schue seems to think that you guys were better than us for some reason. I don't know why. We're awesome and you guys looked like a bunch of nerds," the girl said haughtily, before walking off the stage.

"Thank you for that Alyssa," Mr Schue, who had bolted onto the stage midway through the girl's 'speech', said awkwardly. "Sorry guys," he apologised.

"Give us a half hour and we'll throw something together to make her eat her words," Rachel called back, her own voice haughty now, miffed at being labelled a nerd again after so long out of the high school system.

"Thank you Mr Schue," Figgins moved to take over again. "I would just like to say tonight, how very proud of you all that I am. Almost all of you have gone on to represent McKinley well out in the big wide world," he cringed on the word 'almost' and it was all anyone could do to not burst out laughing. There was probably no one in America who hadn't seen the recent, very public arrest of one Jacob Ben Israel, who had been caught peeping on movie stars. Of course his entire history was laid out for the world to see, including his less than savoury activities at William McKinley High School, which had copped some flak for not taking action in regards to his well-known obsessive, perverted behaviour way back then. "I would like to congratulate you all on all of your accomplishments in your lives, the big and the small-," Figgins was cut off by Sue shoving him out of the way and aiming her bullhorn at the microphone.

"Look at all of you mouth breathers, standing around, drinking free booze and talking about your mundane little lives. Like anyone else wants to hear about your average-ness!" the whole room shrank back from the sheer volume of her voice when magnified twice. "It sickens me to see that my carefully cultivated Cheerios have lost themselves to the drag of everyday life and ignored my valuable lessons on the importance of doing anything and everything to cement your place at the top of the social food chain. The nerds are famous," she gestured in the general direction of the former glee club, who were chattering between themselves to figure out what they were going to sing. "And my Cheerios and the stars of the football team are average. AVERAGE!" she shot them a filthy look as they all winced at the volume again. "But so far as I know, none of you are homeless, rapists or murderers and only one of you is a pervert and we already knew that, so I suppose that overall you haven't done too badly. Regardless, I blame one William Schuester for the bizarre twist in the social hierarchy, him and his disturbingly hypnotic, mind-controlling, lard-filled curly hair," Sue turned her rant onto her favourite subject, causing eye rolls all around. "Now I suppose we have to be subjected to a performance from the original band of merry rejects that Will Schuester tried to call a Glee Club. I SUGGEST YOU PLUG YOUR EARS!" the whole auditorium jerked back as she yelled into the bullhorn, which was amplified by the microphone. She stalked off of the stage and Figgins cleared his throat and floundered for a few seconds. In the end he gave up on trying to finish his speech in favour of introducing the next couple of speakers. After a few more of their teachers and Coach Beiste had spoken, Mr Schue took the stage again.

"I would just like to say-," he began.

"I'M BORED!" came Sue Sylvester's amplified voice.

"Seriously, Sue? We let you come up here and rant like a crazy woman without interruption, now it's my turn," Mr Schue told her.

"Fine!" she snapped, putting her bullhorn down on the table next to her, crossing her arms and glaring at everyone and everything.

"I would just like to say that I am so proud of all of you. You have all achieved so much in your lives and as a teacher it's been fantastic to see how much you have all grown and changed and I have loved catching up with you all tonight. I hope we can do it again in another few years. Now I have to say to my amazing, fantastic original Glee kids. You guys are my living inspirations, when I'm having a bad day, when I feel like giving up I think of you guys and I remember how much you went through, how well you put all of the fighting and the crap aside and supported each other through an incredibly traumatic experience. Finn when you stood up and led that Glee Club it was something to behold. They got themselves together and did some amazing things under your guidance and you should be so proud of yourself. Rachel your constant striving for excellence kept us on point and seeing the supportive, caring leader that you became in senior year was a privilege to be able to watch. Brittany and Santana, I said it before and I'll say it again for everyone to hear; you two restored my faith in love, you fought such a huge battle within yourselves and with the people that surrounded you for acceptance and you never gave up when most would have, you stood by each other through thick and thin, through happiness and sadness and you battled through every obstacle in your path and came out the other side stronger and even more in love than ever. Natasha and Quinn you two went through some major, hugely life changing events, in front of the whole school, that can't have been easy but you both rose up and showed your amazing inner strength and some incredibly admirable bravery. Puckerman, you were the biggest pain in my ass," the room burst out laughing at that.

"You were reckless, obnoxious and you rarely thought with your brain…or thought at all for that matter…but under all that you were one of the most loyal, caring members of that club, with a huge capacity for forgiveness and I watched you go from a reckless juvenile delinquent to a thoughtful, caring, fiercely protective…juvenile delinquent," Mr Schue grinned as the room burst into laughter again.

"Mercedes you showed your ability to fight hard for what you felt that you deserved and it's definitely paid off for you, Mike I always knew you'd be big time one day, you always had the serious moves," Brittany whooped in the crowd at that.

"Tina I watched you go from a shy, stuttering girl who rarely said a word to a confident, happy, outgoing girl who isn't afraid to stand up for herself and her friends. Sam, you never let anything get you down, you were always such a positive easygoing guy and it definitely rubbed off on the rest of the group…thank god," Mr Schue grinned again.

"Artie you rose above your disability and showed that where there's a will, there's a way and you always found that way. You inspired me to never give up and I just know that one day you'll be the guy who finds a fix for spinal cord injuries. Lauren, you were a force to be reckoned with and another one who proved that you can do anything that you put your mind to, even when people shoot you down and make fun of you for it. And you certainly showed that you don't take crap from anyone," Mr Schue looked pointedly at Santana who puffed out her chest and glared at him menacingly. He had to cringe a bit, the girl may have softened for the most part but she definitely still had that Head Bitch in Charge buried in there.

"Kurt," Mr Schue cleared his throat. "You overcame some serious bullying and you never let it change who you were. You were so courageous and you made me so proud, and Blaine you were instrumental in helping Kurt to rise above it all and shine like the star he is. You were such a support and your positivity and ability to cheer us all up on the crappiest days is something that we were all incredibly lucky to have experienced. Anyway, I'm rambling now, what I'm trying to say is that I was so lucky, and so privileged to be able to watch you grow and change into the wonderful people you became and I'm so happy to be able to see you again tonight to see the even more wonderful people that you have become in the years since you left McKinley High. Thank you all, for being who you are and for giving me my reasons for doing this job," Mr Schue finished, his voice nearly cracking with emotion. "Now are you ready for this performance?" he asked. Rachel nodded and the group headed for the stage.

"Thank god-," Sue started to say through her bullhorn, only to be stopped by Santana yanking it out of her hand and giving her a filthy look. The Latina handed the device back with a warning glare and Sue drew herself up to her full height, towering over Santana menacingly before backing down again and giving the girl a curt nod of approval. "Nice balls you've grown there Lopez," she called approvingly through the bullhorn. "I guess that Head Bitch is still in there somewhere." Sue sat back down in her seat before lifting the infernal bullhorn again. "Anyone else who tries that will get dragged down Main Street tied to the back of my Le Car! Naked!" she warned. The Glee Club all walked onto the stage and Finn moved up to the microphone.

"Thanks for all of those lovely words Mr Schue," he said shyly. "You were a super awesome teacher and we all love you too," he told the man, who blushed.

"Gay!" Karofsky coughed loudly from the audience where he was holding hands with his husband. He grinned and gave a salute when Finn attempted to glare at him, only to fail miserably. Natasha unashamedly flipped him off from her position on the stage, a gesture Karofsky promptly and lovingly returned. The two of them had developed a strong brother-sister type relationship and had always kept in touch after school had ended.

"Alright alright, let's just do this thing," Finn laughed. Brad appeared as if out of nowhere, looked more annoyed and jaded than ever and took his spot at the piano. A couple of the old band members that Santana had rounded up and intimidated picked up the instruments that had been left onstage by the current band and they began to play the opening notes of the song. The crowd in the auditorium began clapping out the beat as they belted out a very raw, albeit impressive, completely unrehearsed rendition of Journey's 'Don't Stop Believing'. After that the group goaded Rachel into singing 'Don't Rain On My Parade' which met with huge applause and half shell-shocked, half impressed looks from the current New Directions. The girl who had dissed them earlier looked suitably resentful and horrified at the realisation that there were people out there that were better than her. She reminded Rachel of herself in high school. The group all lined up back on the stage as Santana stepped toward the microphone.

"Mr Schue we wouldn't have gotten through those tough years without you there, supporting us. Much as you pissed us off sometimes by giving all of the solos to Berry and all of the duets to Berry and Finnocence," Santana rolled her dark eyes. "You were there when we needed you, be it during school…or at 3am on a Saturday morning when one of us was under the influence and lost," she twisted to shoot a look at Rachel who blushed and giggled. "And you got better at being fair to everyone and you gave us a fantastic senior year. We do all love you too and thank you for all of the lovely things you had to say about us. We appreciate it and we want you to know that we care for you as much as you do us. Thank you for giving us our safe and accepting place and the best part of our day," she finished, walking over to hug her former teacher. Puck leapt forward followed by the rest of the club for a group hug.

"I will vomit in this punch bowl if you lot don't stop that sickening display of contrived emotion right now," Sue hollered through her bullhorn.

"Oh my god would someone just destroy that thing?" someone yelled.

"SHUT UP!" Sue barked, upending the table she was standing next to, before upending every punchbowl in sight, creating a hell of a mess, before stalking out of the auditorium.

Glee

The rest of the night had been a blur of drinking and dancing, no one wanted it to end, but it had to and the next morning they all met up back in the Berry's basement. No one talked much, they just soaked up each other's presence, making the most of it before that evening and the next day when they would all start going their separate ways again. Finn was the first to speak after a long silence.

"We should make this an annual thing," he told them. "Getting together for a weekend I mean. We wouldn't always have to do it here. We could just make a date each year and all meet up somewhere. We can catch up and keep in touch more than we have before this. I had no idea how much I missed you guys until we were all back here together," he admitted.

"Me neither," Rachel sighed, curling a little sleepily against Santana's arm. "I think an annual thing would be a great idea," she smiled at Finn. "It might not be easy to get a date we all agree on but you guys all have to promise to try your hardest, kay?" she told them all, receiving a series of nods in return. They all lapsed into silence again before it was broken by a quiet sniffling. There was a flurry of people searching each others' faces before they all finally found the source of the sniffling. It was Brittany, her face tucked securely into Natasha's neck, Natasha had tears in her eyes too, she had never been able to see Brittany cry without it making her cry too.

"Aw Britt," Mercedes sighed tenderly.

"I don't want it to end," Brittany whimpered into Natasha's neck. Natasha held her tighter as Santana moved to hug her from behind. Her distress quickly set off the rest of the girls in the room and even most of the guys were looking decidedly teary eyed. The next half hour was spent hugging and comforting each other and swearing black and blue to each other (but mostly to Brittany who seemed disbelieving that it'd actually happen) that this time they would definitely keep in touch much better than they had before.

Puck was the first to have to leave, wanting to get back to his family he had booked a 4pm flight and had to get packed up. The others slowly followed until it was just Finn, Rachel, Tina, Brittany, Santana, Natasha and Quinn left as they were all leaving the next day. Brittany was snuggled limply and quietly between Santana and Natasha on the couch, having exhausted herself bursting into tears each time someone else left. The two girls kept shooting worried glances at each other over the blonde's head.

A few years after Natasha's whirlwind of self destruction and the beginning of their subsequent treatment together, Brittany had become an emotional wreck whenever she was under stress. She would be oversensitive and would have periods of being so completely overwrought that it took all three of her best friends hours on end to calm her down again. It was a constant source of worry for them all but her therapist had explained that Brittany was just struggling to deal with all of her emotions now that she was facing them instead of detaching from them and that she just needed love, support and to keep going to therapy sessions to improve. She had actually generally improved quite quickly but she still had a tendency to really struggle when she was particularly stressed or upset over something.

"Ok Britt?" Rachel asked tenderly, pushing a glass of water into the blonde's hand. Brittany swallowed a few mouthfuls of water before nodding and smiling weakly. "Ok," Rachel smiled back, brushing Brittany's bangs out of her face and leaning down to kiss the woman's forehead. As she straightened up she reached out to squeeze Santana's shoulder comfortingly. Santana smiled up at her tensely catching her hand and squeezing it briefly as Rachel pulled it away.

"I just didn't realise how tough it'd be being back here with everyone," Brittany said softly, smiling as Natasha reached up to wipe at a stray tear on Brittany's cheek with her sleeve.

"It brings a lot of stuff back. I mean it's one thing to come back for a bit for Christmas and maybe see a few of the old crowd around again but just, all of us being together, back in that school…it's a lot," Santana replied as she watched the exchange between Brittany and Natasha.

"It is," Tina spoke up quietly. She had an unreadable expression on her face. At questioning looks from some of the others she smiled and shrugged. "I'm really glad to see that you guys all stuck together. You all just…made each other better people in high school. It's nice you're still doing that." Natasha smiled softly at the girl, who smiled back.

"We'd be lost without each other. We've been so lucky that we've been able to stick together and still be big parts of each others' lives. That's not exactly the norm," Quinn replied. Santana's phone rang then and the Latina excused herself to answer it.

"But you can't deny that you've had to fight hard for that," Rachel piped up.

"True," Quinn smiled. Santana came back then, looking apprehensive.

"That was my mom. She says that Judy, Greg and Gen and Helen and assorted kids are there and we're having a late lunch together," She told them, her eyes locked on Brittany. As she expected the blonde's face crumbled and she burst into tears again. They decided to make their goodbyes quick so that they could get her out of there and settle her down again and so, after brief hugs and see you next times they headed out.

Lunch was a noisy crowded affair and after everything had been cleaned up and Mikaeli was busy following Elijah, her newest crush, everywhere he went, the four women snuck away to Santana's old room, closing the door and squeezing onto her king sized bed side by side. It was no easy feat.

"I swear this bed shrank, Natasha whined, hooking a leg over one of Santana's so that she didn't fall off the bed.

"Nah you just got fat Tashie," Santana retorted with a smirk and a prod to Natasha's belly.

"Funny I thought it was _your_ ass that had doubled in size," Natasha came back, pinching Santana's arm in retaliation.

"Ow! Fuck you!" Santana yelped.

"Don't be mean you two. If anyone's ass got fat it was mine after having Mikaeli," Brittany said with a quiet smile. She laughed when she was met with three simultaneous scoffs.

"Brittany your ass is in no way fat. I swear you're skinnier now than you were before you got pregnant," Quinn said, rolling her eyes. "And you made it look ridiculously easy. I felt like I had to work myself to the bone after Beth to get my body back," she complained.

"Yeah but most of it came off when I was breastfeeding," Brittany replied. "And walking around the living room for hours every night when she had colic and reflux."

"Yeah I guess that was the difference," Quinn replied thoughtfully. Since Shelby had come back with Beth in their senior year and Quinn had gotten to become a part of her daughter's life, she had stopped being a taboo topic of discussion.

"And you're not allowed to be jealous 'cause you came out of it with like, four little stretch marks and I have like four thousand," Brittany told her, with a nudge of her elbow into Quinn's ribs.

"I apologise. I will never complain again," Quinn said, breaking into a wide, goofy smile at the end.

"This is what I miss about high school," Natasha said suddenly. "Just hanging out in a puppy pile on one of our beds, nothing better to do, no jobs, no kids to worry about – not that I don't love Kaeli to pieces - but just hanging out and talking. About boys and girls, about how much our parents sucked and how we were never going to be like them. About school and Cheerios and Glee and everything. This is what I miss the most."

"Yeah, me too. It's funny how back then we couldn't wait to get the fuck out of Lima and leave it all behind, and now in a way we wish we could go back and live those carefree days again," Santana agreed. "Although there's no way in Hell I'd want to relive junior year," she said, her voice softening and trembling slightly at the thought.

"It wasn't all bad," Natasha replied threading the fingers of her right hand with Santana's as Brittany did the same on the other side.

"It wasn't exactly good," Santana retorted.

"No. But someone asked me a question at one of my presentations recently and it really made me think. This girl asked me 'If you had the opportunity to go back and have the choice of the life you've had, the life you've got, or a life where none of the abuse would happen, what would you do?' At first I thought, obviously, I'd change it. But then I realised that if none of that had happened, I probably never would have met you guys. I wouldn't have you in my life today and the thought of that…well I didn't want to think about that. I truly love my life. In spite of everything I've been through, everything I'm going through. I love it. And I wouldn't trade such an amazing life for one with a little less pain. Because, you know what? I think the pain of the past is what makes the present so amazing. That pain, that darkness is what makes the good times so good and it's what reminds me to never take the good, happy times for granted. If I could go back and choose? I'd choose this life. Every single time," Natasha finished, her cheeks flushing and her voice full of passion.

"God I love your outlook on life," Brittany mumbled after a few minutes of silently letting Natasha's words soak in. She dabbed at her teary eyes with her sleeve. "And I think I'd do it all again for the life I have now too."

"Me too," Quinn agreed. When Natasha put it like that how could she not agree?

"Makes sense I guess," Santana said softly, her eyes sad and teary. Natasha untangled her fingers and reached an arm around Santana's waist to hug her as best she could in their current position. "But I still wish that you didn't have to go through so much pain."

"I know honey," Natasha said with a smile as Brittany rolled over to hug Santana too making Quinn smile at the display. She never would have guessed in their first two years at high school that there was such a sensitive, sweet, loving girl inside that mean, angry bitch who had challenged and manipulated her way to being Quinn's right hand woman. But then she figured that other people probably hadn't guessed that there was an insecure, miserable girl named Lucy who was hiding behind the formidable ice queen Quinn Fabray either, or that there was an emotionally damaged, deeply sad yet incredibly sweet girl that hid behind a vacant, bubbly, vapid façade named Brittany Pierce, or even that there was an angry, terrified, suicidal girl that had hidden behind the force of nature that was Natasha Isaacs.

As they lay quietly, listening to the noise coming from downstairs and contemplating the way their lives could have turned out had things been different, Quinn realised that when you meet people, they appear a certain way. For most people these appearances are natural, not even consciously thought about…but other times they are carefully cultivated to hide what lies beneath. All four of them had been the latter and she thought that if things had been different, then chances were they would all be wherever they had ended up, still hiding who they truly were from the world. Always carefully cultivating their appearances to make sure that no one ever got in close enough to find what lay beneath. And with that thought, Quinn had never been more grateful for everything that had happened junior year.

Glee!

A/N: Thank you once again for reading and reviewing etc. It's been awesome.


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